Entropy
by silver-footsteps
Summary: Every time he wanted to apologize, she would reply, "We were too young, we were too selfish and you were too lost." It had taken two words to shatter their bond. But it took many more to heal it. SasuSaku
1. Sunflowers

Honestly, I hate Sasuke right now, but it used to be my OTP and all the great fics I've been reading lately have been swaying me back on this angsty ship.

Since this is still under construction, critique and feedback would be super-appreciated.

Enjoy!

* * *

><p>If there's a graceful way to die, I must have missed the memo.<p>

Naruto's body is sprawled a few feet away. I can feel his cold hand against my bare toes. Every once in a while, they twitch.

My boots? Incinerated in a blast of exploding tags and a well-aimed Katon Jutsu. Rain pelts my face in angry, stinging drops.

I can barely make out Naruto's shaky, wet breaths through the sound of water splattering against the mud. He chokes once, coughing weakly. But just when I am afraid that he will be silent forever, he sputters and begins wheezing again.

I want desperately to crawl over him. His lungs are filling with blood. He's drowning. If only I could get my hands on a kunai and slit his side to drain his lungs. Then, he would be okay until help arrived. Even if I died right here, he would make it.

He would be okay.

But my body melds into the cold mud. I can't will my arms and legs to move. I can't feel my right foot. The rain pours even harder. Water trickles into my eyes, clearing away the blood and dirt. My side aches. I'm probably bleeding internally. The rain tastes sweet against my tongue.

My eyelids droop.

So tired.

Naruto coughs again, a wet, sickening sound. I love him so much, my brother.

I just want to sleep.

"Captain!" a voice shouts through the rain. Heavy feet slosh through the mud. There are a few different voices all shouting. Someone curses loudly.

"Hey! Over here!" one of them calls. The splashing comes closer. A dark figure looms over my face, blocking the cold rain. He leans over and until I can make out wide eyes the color of honey. I recognize the fear. His icy hands shake as he checks my pulse and tilts my head to check for head trauma. I can't really tell if the droplets falling are tears or raindrops.

"She's alive," he announces in a shaky voice.

There are a few sighs of relief.

"Sensei. If you can understand me, look up," he says, looking intently into my eyes. Very slowly, I will my eyes to comply.

"Good. Sensei, I'm going to pick you up. I think you broke some ribs so this will hurt," he informs me. The pain sears through my middle and up my back as he lifts me from the mud. I want to scream but my voice is gone.

But through the suffering and the deep agony that pierces my shattered right leg, I feel undeniable pride.

"T…Taku…mi." I force my aching throat to say his name. His eyes widen.

"Good job," I manage to say before blacking out.

His panicked voice shouts "Sensei!" until the sound fades into the soothing rhythm of the rain.

And from somewhere far away, I hear a voice whisper:

_"Sakura, don't you dare leave me alone."_

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 1: Sunflowers

Sakura stood in front of the black gate. The rough metal scraped against her fingertips as she lifted the rusty latch and slipped into the front yard. The plastic bag dangling from her left hand rustled as she climbed the steps and knocked on the front door. She listened carefully and heard laughter from the backyard. She unlocked the door with the spare key in the mailbox and left her boots in the foyer.

"Hello?" she called through the silent house. When she passed the kitchen, the smell of miso soup made her stomach growl. After a few more steps, she was at the back of the house. The back door was open. She could see their shadows on the back porch.

"Hi!" Sakura greeted as she opened the screen door with her foot. Her parents looked up at her with identical expressions of surprise. And then, Haruno Hisako opened her arms with a bright smile.

"Sakura! What a wonderful surprise!" she laughed as Sakura enveloped her in a tight hug. When Sakura pulled away, Hisako looked worried. She patted her daughter's arm.

"Honey, I think you've lost some weight," she commented. Sakura didn't reply. Instead, she turned to her father. He smiled. But Sakura frowned. She looked deep into his eyes that were the same color as hers, crossing her arms over her chest. Her gaze darted down to his knee and then back up to his face. Haruno Yuusuke's shoulders slumped.

"Dad," Sakura began in a reproaching tone. She plopped down on the deck in front of him, her hands flaring with green chakra. When her hands made contact with his right knee, Yuusuke sighed. He put his hand on top of hers with a sad smile.

"I can't fool my daughter, the medic," he said. She shook her head as she quickly checked his knee and temporarily soothed his pain. When she finished, she patted the old, gnarled scar.

"Honestly, Dad. If you had gotten this properly treated ten years ago, you wouldn't be in so much pain," Sakura scolded as she deposited the bag of peaches in her mom's lap. Hisako peered into the bag with a smile.

"Thank you, dear. I'll go wash these," Hisako said as she got to her feet. Sakura tugged on the bottom of her skirt as she passed.

"Do you need any help?" Sakura inquired. Hisako shook her head as she went back into the house.

"How are things, Sakura?" Yuusuke suddenly asked, claiming Sakura's attention. She crossed her legs as she thought for a minute.

"I've been okay. I had a couple of emergencies at the hospital this week but it's been pretty quiet. How's the store been?" she replied, leaning back on her hands. She looked into her father's face, more wrinkled than it had been during her childhood. His dark hair, going gray at the sides, was cropped short. There was a new mole on his cheek. She reminded herself to keep an eye on it just in case. Yuusuke scratched the light layer of stubble on his chin.

"Pretty good. Business is slow but your mom and I are getting by," he said. He caught the worried look in Sakura's eyes and promptly scowled.

"Dad….are you sure you're ok?" Sakura asked. Yuusuke sighed. It was the beginning of the same conversation they always had. He reached over and squeezed Sakura's hand.

"Sakura, I may be getting older, but your mom and I are getting along just fine," he replied and she dropped the subject. She knew how stubborn her father could get. Her infamous obstinacy had to have come from someone after all. She opened her mouth to say something else when Hisako reappeared with a tray of washed and quartered peaches along with glasses of iced tea. She sat beside Sakura and watched contentedly as her family ate.

"So, what brings you here?" Hisako asked as she watched Sakura spear another slice of peach with her toothpick. Sakura slowly chewed the fruit as she gathered the words. Seeing her serious face, the smiles faded off her parents' faces. They watched her with wary expressions, steeling themselves for the worst.

"I…was thinking about going back to the border for another rotation," she finally announced. Hisako's hand flew to her mouth. She grabbed her husband's hand, mute with shock. Yuusuke's mouth tightened into a line. He slowly lowered his toothpick, his eyes boring into his daughters'. Identical shades of jade stared at each other.

"But you just got home, honey," Yuusuke finally said as his eyes softened.

Sakura set her toothpick down on the tray and stared her parents straight in the eyes. Her mother, so gentle and so optimistic: she was just like any other civilian parent. She was scared to death of war. Unlike the shinobi clans that hailed those that went to war as heroes, her parents instinctively flinched away from the idea of violence. But Sakura steeled her resolve. She was fighting for people like her parents- people that couldn't protect themselves. As she reminded herself of just why she was choosing to go back to the battlefront, she placed a hand on her mother's knee.

"They need me," Sakura firmly said.

Hisako thought for a long moment, her gray eyes wide with shock. But after some time, she seemed to a wilt a little. She looked at her husband and they both gave sad sighs. She reached out and took her daughter's strong hand in hers. They were almost the same size, both of them with slightly crooked pinkies. But Hisako's hands were soft and Sakura's were scarred from years of weapon-training and overusing chakra.

"If it's what you believe in," Hisako finally relented as she looked down at Sakura's hands.

Sakura pulled her mother into a tight hug, pretending not to notice when she felt tears wet her shoulder. And as she looked at her father over her mother's shoulder, she promised, "I'll come home again."

Two weeks later, Sakura covered her furniture to keep the dust off and cleared out her refrigerator. She spent extra hours at the hospital to tie up loose ends and file the necessary paperwork. Although she trusted the remaining staff to run everything smoothly in her absence, she couldn't help but worry about the smallest details. Finally, after days of cleaning her house in between signing paperwork, Sakura flopped back on the floor of her bedroom and sighed. She stared up at the white ceiling and listened to the birds chirping outside. In just 15 hours, she would be leaving Konoha and travelling for three days to reach one of the camps on the border of Fire Country.

During every spare moment, she had tried to find Naruto but he had disappeared on a mission. It wasn't too unusual for Naruto to be on some classified mission for months at a time. Still, it worried her that he hadn't even bothered to say anything to her. She had begged Tsunade for details but the Hokage had remained mysteriously tight-lipped about the details. It was after the fifth time Tsunade refused to disclose her secrets that Sakura had finally given up and left her stubborn mentor with a fond smile.

Sakura flinched when she felt a familiar chakra draw dangerously close to her house. She squeezed her eyes shut, praying that he was just paying a visit to Rock Lee who lived a block away. Despite her desperate wishes, the footsteps stopped directly in front of her front door. The doorbell rang. Sakura groaned and flopped over on her side. She knew it would be rude to keep him waiting so she reluctantly stood and made her way to the door.

She slowly unlocked the door and opened it.

"…Hi," Sakura said with hesitation, leaning against the doorframe. There stood Hyuuga Neji, his dark hair pulled back with an elastic band. His face, infuriatingly handsome and calm, was unchanged. The proud jut of his noble chin made her stomach roll. His porcelain mask dangled from his fingertips. A backpack sat at his feet, battered and covered with dust.

"…May I come in?" he finally asked. Sakura took in the sweat on his face and the way he was breathing a little too fast. He had come to see her right after a mission. That wasn't unusual. She sucked in a deep breath and smiled. She was aware that her expression was too fake as she stepped aside. Neji gave her a look. The serious look that made her want to wring his neck because she knew that he thought he understood everything about her. And she hated seeing that face on him. It made her believe, for a moment, that he might actually care about something other than her body.

"Sure. Do you want coffee or tea?" she said, playing the part of a good hostess. He paused to take off his sandals. Sakura turned away from him, heading to the kitchen. She listened to his footfalls, light as a whisper. He stood in the doorway, watching her as she filled a kettle with water.

"Haruno," he quietly said. She tried to hide that her hand was shaking as she set the kettle on the stove. It landed with a loud clang that rang through the warm kitchen.

"Haruno," Neji repeated as he took a step forward. Sakura wrung her hands together, refusing to turn to him. His hand felt hot through the fabric of her shirt when he touched her shoulder. A shudder ran through her body. Even though she was so familiar with that hand, it suddenly frightened her. She took a step away from him, feeling his fingers lightly slide off her. As she expected, he didn't make any move to get closer. Of course. That was how he always was. They had been stuck in the same dance for so long, never moving forward and never going anywhere.

"Please… I don't want to hear this right now," she quietly said, trying to keep her voice level.

It had been so much easier not to think about anything. At night, she could almost pretend that his eyes were looking at her tenderly. If she really tried to convince herself, she could imagine that he was calling her name and not Tenten's. But before the sun rose, he would always be gone. Outside of his small apartment, they would go back to being regular acquaintances. It made her sick to her stomach to imagine what he thought of her.

Easy. Desperate.

"I heard you're leaving tomorrow. There is no other time to talk about this, Haruno," he said in his perfectly logical tone that made her want to scream. It was always the same. There was never any emotion in his voice.

"Please… leave. I'm sick of dealing with you… with this," Sakura sighed, suddenly too tired to deal with him. She pressed her palms against the countertop to steady herself. With baited breath, she listened to him stand quietly for another moment before his footsteps creaked across the hardwood floor. He paused by the entrance to put on his sandals. Without any indication that he cared, he picked up his bag and slipped out the door. Sakura listened to his sure steps as he walked down the sidewalk. He didn't hesitate once, didn't turn back even one step.

"You don't need a damn mask," she sighed as she remembered the owl painted in delicate blue strokes across the white porcelain. Pressing her palms against her throbbing temples, she closed her eyes and took deep breaths through her nose. But no matter how much she tried, she found that she couldn't calm down.

With a growl of frustration, she stormed through her living room. She impatiently shoved her feet into her boots and then opened the kitchen window. She channeled chakra to her hands and feet and crawled off the ledge to scale the wall. On the roof of her house, she broke into a run, listening to her feet pounding against the shingles. When she reached the edge of the roof, she threw herself into the air, wind sweeping through her short hair. She landed on the building across the street with ease. She travelled across the village, relishing the feel of getting out of the hospital and using her muscles. At the far end of the village near the south gates, she found a thick patch of trees growing by a small pond. Anyone else would walk past without noticing anything. But she ducked under the foliage, following the faint path pressed into the soft dirt. The ground was speckled with the little flecks of sunlight that made it through the trees' thick cover. After a few minutes, she found the little cottage that belonged in a book of fairytales. Ivy crawled up the sides of the house, sprawling across the dark stone, complete with a brick chimney. There was even a brass doorknocker in the shape of a lion.

"Sakura?"

She turned to find Sai sitting in the lower branches of a tree with a sketchpad in his lap. As he dropped to the ground and approached her, he carefully closed the sketchpad and tucked it under his arm. He wiped the charcoal on his fingers off on his dark pants. Instead of his usual outfit, he was wearing a blue t-shirt and black sweatpants. Barefoot, he treaded through the grass. It was so different from how he normally looked that it startled her each time she saw him.

"What's wrong?" he asked as he headed back into his house. He didn't ask her to come inside but he really didn't need to. She had visited so many times that she didn't feel like a visitor anymore. Sai ducked to avoid hitting his head against a low wooden beam. Sakura slipped off her shoes by the front door and followed him inside. The walls were plastered with half-finished sketches and soft watercolors. The entire downstairs was his studio. Tubes of paint and discarded drawings covered every available surface. Sai's latest painting stood uncompleted on the easel by the window. Sakura stopped in the middle of the room to just look. It always amazed her that the emotionally crippled person she had known had come so far. Every single piece of work had a title, each one filled with some sort of emotion. Sakura spotted her favorite piece wedged in the doorframe leading to the kitchen. It was a simple sheet of paper with a rough pencil sketch. It was her and Naruto and Kakashi hunched over the counter at Ichiraku, slurping on their individual bowls of ramen. Maybe it was the way that Naruto's mouth was completely stuffed as he ate or the way Kakashi looked amused and irritated all at once or the way that she was smiling, but she never grew tired of looking at the drawing. Sai had even added Ayame and old Teuchi peeking at them from behind the counter. The longer she looked at it, the more she could imagine the salty smell of ramen in the air and the low babble of conversation in the restaurant.

"You like that one the most," Sai observed as he joined her, wiping his hands on a clean rag. He tossed the rag over his shoulder and moved around the room digging through piles of paper and paint-stained rags. When Sakura turned around, he approached her with a sheet of paper that had been torn out of one of his sketchpads. She lightly gripped the edges as she looked into Sai's face. Although he wasn't the most animated person, she could tell that he almost seemed…nervous? When she finally examined the drawing, she understood why.

She recognized Naruto's messy hair and his mouth opened in a huge laugh. His head was flung back, arms stretched out at his sides. The strong wind tangled his hair, pulled at his clothes and sent leaves spinning in the air. And then, towards the bottom of the picture, she saw a woman lying in the tall grass. Her bare feet dug into the soft earth and her arms were carelessly thrown to the sides. There was something so mysterious and beautiful about her smile. She looked so content just to be there, to be herself. But as Sakura looked closer, she saw that the hem of the woman's shirt had ridden up, exposing her flat stomach and a suspiciously familiar mark. She hesitantly looked down, touching the spot where her scar would be. When she looked back at the drawing, she began to recognize the face.

"Sai… is this me?" she breathed. Sai moved away, his bare feet padding lightly against the floor.

"Yes," he simply replied. Sakura turned, her face glowing. She smiled so hard that her cheeks hurt. Then, hugging the sheet of paper to her chest, she closed her eyes.

"Thank you, Sai."

When he didn't reply, Sakura looked around. She still felt his chakra but he wasn't anywhere in the room. A moment later, he emerged from the kitchen carrying plastic buckets. She watched him look up at the roof, set a bucket on the ground and carefully slide it a few centimeters to the left and then to the right. He repeated the process with the other containers before taking a couple of steps backward to stand next to her. Sakura put her hands on her hips, looking from the high-beamed ceiling to the old buckets. It almost seemed as if part of the ceiling was darker than the rest.

"What- Is your ceiling dripping?" Sakura demanded as she watched a drop of water slowly fall through the air and land in one of the buckets with a high-pitched dripping noise. Sai mimicked her, his eyes fixed on the droplets that gathered and fell. Their heads moved in unison, looking up at the ceiling before following the quiet descent of each drop.

"You…should probably get someone to look at that," she finally commented after a minute. Sai shrugged. When she returned the drawing, Sai looked surprised and even a little insulted.

"It's for you." He said it as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. No amount of refusal would have swayed him. Not with that stubborn look on his face. Instead, she hugged it against her chest and smiled at him.

"Thanks… I've been having a pretty crappy day so this makes up for it," she said. And it was true. All her stress from getting ready to leave and all her frustration from dealing with a certain Hyuuga were so easily forgotten. It would have been absolutely perfect if Naruto had been there with her. As the thought crossed her mind, she felt her smile fade. Sai must have seen it too because she saw him quickly struggle to change the topic.

"Are you leaving tomorrow morning?" Sai finally inquired. Sakura nodded absently as she flopped back on the half of the sofa not covered with sketchpads and opened boxes of charcoal. Sai sat on the arm, one foot dangling in the air. They listened to the water dripping from the defective roof, not really saying anything. Then again, Sakura had never felt pressured to fill the silence with Sai. He was genuinely comfortable in his own skin and that confidence had a tendency to radiate. Over the years, he had gone from annoying, unwanted Sasuke-replacement to one of her closest friends. It was Sai that she went to whenever she wanted to cry over a lost patient. It was Sai that supported her when she stumbled home completely drunk while an equally drunk Naruto trailed after them, singing.

Sakura hadn't realized that she had fallen asleep until Sai was shaking her awake. Slowly, she opened her eyes and found herself staring at Sai's chest. There was a dark gray across his t-shirt that hadn't been there before.

"Sakura. It's almost seven," he said. Sakura blinked once and then yawned, cracking her jaw in the process. Satisfied that she was awake, Sai walked off, wiping his hands on a rag. There was fresh yellow paint splattered across his pants. After a moment, she decided that she didn't care what time it was and dropped her head on the armrest and closed her eyes again. But instead of sleeping, she listened to Sai moving around in the kitchen. The refrigerator hummed in the background as the faucet ran. Sakura heard the familiar sound of Sai cleaning his paintbrushes off in the sink. The wood handles scraped against each other as they fell against the counter.

Then, there were Sai's footsteps, light and measured, just as a shinobi's should be.

"Sakura?"

With a sigh, she opened her eyes again. Sai was sitting on the floor in front of her, his legs crossed. Still a little groggy, she craned her neck to catch a glimpse of the clock next to his easel on the other side of the room.

Crap. 7:13.

She had been asleep for almost 5 hours. But for some reason, whenever she took a nap at Sai's house, she always felt refreshed. Something about the smell of oil paint and crisp paper and little box of lavender growing in his kitchen calmed her. Or, she realized as she looked at Sai's blank expression, it was Sai's presence. She didn't trust anyone more with her life than Naruto and Sai. Maybe it was just being near her teammate, knowing that she was safe, let her sleep so well.

"Oh, sorry. I completely passed out," Sakura apologized, stifling a yawn. He half-shrugged, letting her know that he really didn't mind. After all, most of her days off for the last six months had been spent here with Naruto, dozing off in the warm sun while Sai drew the scenery.

"I should get home and pack up everything else," she announced as she got to her feet. Sai did the same. Sakura paused when her hands felt strangely empty. She looked back at the sofa and found Sai's drawing pressed between two of the cushions. Berating herself for nearly forgetting, she carefully folded the paper in half and tucked it into her belt. When she turned back to Sai, he looked confused.

"Should I say goodbye now?" Sai asked, genuinely unsure. When she and Naruto had left for their rotations at an ANBU base two and a half years ago, Sai had been on a mission. They had left him letters in his mailbox saying goodbye, but, it occurred to Sakura, that she had never really had to part with Sai face-to-face. It felt a little wrong to be leaving him.

"I guess. I'm leaving before dawn tomorrow so you probably shouldn't see me off," she conceded. When she held her arms out for a hug, Sai's eyes grew wide. He tried to copy her, spreading his arms open in an awkward, stiff stance. She stifled a giggle as she took a step forward and wrapped her arms around him. And slowly, Sai hugged her back, his actions so careful and slow that Sakura nearly burst out laughing. When she drew back, his old fake smile was back on. He was nervous. How silly.

"I'll see you in two years, Sai."

"Bye, Ugly."

And the insult sounded so fond that she couldn't even try to get angry. With one last smile, Sakura squeezed his arm and walked out of the house.

It was still humid outside when she left Sai's home. There weren't many street lights in this corner of the village so she let her feet guide her through the thicket of trees. When she emerged back onto paved road, she took a moment to adjust. It was almost like Sai's little cottage was in a completely different world. It was so quiet, like a scene from a fairy tale, but as soon as she passed the trees, she was bombarded with the sounds of people chatting and laughter from inside restaurants and bars. Sakura took a deep breath and jumped, feeling the air whip through her hair, and landed on the roof of the library. From up here, she could see the entire village bathed in soft lantern-light. But the warm color was swallowed by the dark sky that glittered with millions of stars. As she stared up into the endless universe, an all-too-familiar ache tugged at her heart. So many years ago, she had lain, watching the same sky with the same sense of wonder. To her left had been Naruto, snoring with his mouth wide open. And to her right lay Sasuke. For some reason, under the starry sky, she had convinced herself that they were somehow closer, that they were connected by some bond.

Tilting her head back, Sakura cupped her hands around her mouth and yelled, "Naruto, come home safely!"

And in her heart, she wondered if Sasuke was seeing the same stars as she was.

Every once in a while, she would indulge herself with moments like this. She had seen him attack Konoha. She had watched him trying to kill Naruto, his supposed best friend. And the dark aura that had surrounded him had been suffocating. The moment he had stepped foot in the village, she had known that he wasn't the same boy she had loved. She couldn't deny that anymore. Still, she had clung to some small hope. It hadn't mattered that her love was unrequited. After all, she had given up on those feelings when she was 16. All she had wanted was for her team, her precious people, to be reunited.

But during their last fight, Naruto had blurted out the truth about Sasuke's clan and everything had fallen apart. Naruto had defeated Pein, breaking up Akatsuki for good. And Sasuke, leaving his second team behind, fled the village.

Sasuke had always been good at that, running away.

It had been three years since then and Konoha had been at war ever since. It had become a regular thing to see groups of shinobi lying in the ER, screaming and gushing blood. All she could do was try to ease their pain and heal what she could. But lately, she lost more people than she could save. Each night, her feet dragged her into her office, sleeves dyed red. She would huddle up in the black chair, and clamp her wet hands over her ears, trying to block out the sounds of the agony in the hospital. Other nights, she would simply collapse from exhaustion over her desk. When she finally did leave the hospital, she would drag her heavy limbs back to her house. There, she would strip off her clothes and scrub them in the sink until her hands were numb and the water was pink. No matter how tired she was, she would always take a hot shower before finally crawling onto the sofa and fall asleep to the mindless drone of the television.

It would be a lie to say that she enjoyed her job. When she took a step back, she could honestly say that she was proud of her work. But in the moment, there was nothing enjoyable about watching the life fade from someone's eyes. Still, on her days off, she would encounter the wives of shinobi she had saved, the children of civilians she had treated, and they would all thank her. Only then, did she feel like the red staining her skin seemed meaningful.

Sakura sucked in a deep breath through her nose. She firmly grabbed a hold of Sasuke and all her negative thoughts and shoved them back deep into her mind. She was done indulging herself. There was no point drowning herself in the past when there was so much to get done now. With a clear head, she ran back to her house.

The alarm blared loudly at 4 am. But Sakura was already awake. She slipped out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her middle and took a second to shut off the alarm. Her tired eyes flickered to the light switch, but they ached at the mere thought of bright light. So she dressed using the faint light that filtered in through the windows. She rubbed her hair with the towel before tossing it over the footboard of her bed.

A yawn escaped her throat as she pulled on a mesh tank top. But when she put on her standard ANBU vest, she wriggled a little and found that her mother had been right. It felt a little loose in the tummy area. In retrospect, losing weight wasn't exactly a terrible thing for women, but Sakura reminded herself to eat more vitamins. Weight loss as a result of stress was never a good thing for a medic. Next were standard black pants and the medical apron on top. She sat on the edge of the bed as she secured her shuriken pouch on her upper thigh with a length of white cloth. The weight was familiar, almost comforting. Even on her days off, it stayed under her civilian clothes, a constant reminder of what she did for a living. She secured the buckles of her medical pouch across her left hip, listening to the metal and glass click together quietly inside. As she glanced around the room to check to see if she had forgotten anything, she gathered up her damp hair into a messy ponytail on top of her head. Snatching her black gloves off the dresser, she stuck them in her pocket and then found her katana propped up against the door. She hefted the weapon in her hands, testing the weight. She had become oddly fond of the katana during her recent time with ANBU. Whenever she was stuck in battle, trying to conserve chakra to heal, she found that the blade was light and efficient. She strapped it to her back and took one last look at her bedroom. Then, hefting her backpack over her shoulder, she opened the door and walked out.

After a piece of toast and a glass of water, Sakura locked her door, slipped the key into her bag and flitted through the sleeping village. The scent of baking bread spread through the cool morning air as she stopped in front of her parents' house. She hopped over the gate and looped around the back. As she had suspected, her parents were sitting on the back porch, still in their pajamas. Hisako looked up, her graying hair falling out of its loose braid. She gave a frail smile that concealed her concern very poorly. Sakura stepped onto the porch and knelt in front of her parents. Hisako took her hands as tears gathered in her eyes.

"I came back once. I can do it again. Take care, mom," Sakura softly said as she hugged her mother. Hisako nodded as she dabbed at her eyes. She gave a watery smile as she reluctantly released her daughter. Sakura turned to her father. Yuusuke's expression was weary as he put his arms around her.

"Take good care of mom, dad. I'll come home. I promise," she said. Yuusuke drew back and with eyes the same color as hers, he smiled.

"Be safe, honey," he simply replied. Sakura nodded and then with one last look at her loving family, she stood and teleported to Konoha's main gates. When she reappeared in a puff of smoke, there were already three people waiting for her.

"Is this everyone?" Sakura asked, automatically assuming leadership. They nodded in unison, like bobble head dolls. They must have been younger than her because they seemed to twitch with every sound and their movements were jerky. Sakura half-smiled.

"Is this your first time going?" she inquired.

"Ah… yes. Is it that obvious?" one of them nervously replied. Sakura laughed a little.

"Let's get going. I want to get to the base in three days. Don't fall behind," she ordered, sobering. The three other shinobi bowed. Sakura nodded once and then turned on her heel and sprinted out of the gates.

True to her word, Sakura kept up a brutal pace. She jumped from branch to branch as the wind whipped against her face and her calves began to ache. One of her teammates managed to keep pace with her but the other two struggled a little, huffing and complaining under their breaths. Still she ignored this, pushing them until it was absolutely necessary to stop and set up camp. By the third day, her three teammates lagged behind her about one or two steps but she didn't say anything. The muggy Fire Country air was thinning out, giving away to a drier type of heat. The foliage seemed to thicken, closing in around them. Sometime around noon, there was a bird call. Sakura abruptly ground to a halt and her teammates nearly knocked into her.

"Shiroi hane*," she called out to the treetops. It was completely silent for a minute. And then, several meters ahead, something dark dropped out of a tree. Out of the cover of the forest, an ANBU emerged with a fierce red wolf painted across his mask. Sakura let out a little sigh of relief as he approached.

"Ah, a sight for sore eyes. I didn't know you were coming back," Kiba greeted as he gave her a one-armed hug and she could sense his grin through his mask. He tugged his mask down and set it on top of his head. The jagged pink scar on his right cheek caught her attention for a moment. He caught her stare and his smile dimmed.

"Yeah, well, I couldn't trust you guys to take of yourselves. Are you alone?" Sakura quickly replied, forcing her eyes away. She glanced around but she couldn't feel any other chakra signatures in the area.

"Uh there are three other guys on sentry duty around the area and one other guy just went back around ten minutes ago to let base camp know you guys are on your way," he reported. Sakura nodded. With that, the group of five took off into the forest. Sakura let her feet lead her through the maze of trees that she had spent two years navigating. She noted, with satisfaction, that all signs of travel had been covered well. It took another hour of travel before there was another shrill bird call. As they continued forward, Sakura felt the faintest ripple of chakra hit her.

"This barrier's new," she commented as she channeled chakra to her finger and lightly touched her forehead. Everyone else did the same. In an instant, the thicket of trees in front of her vanished, revealing a narrow opening between the tree trunks. Kiba grinned.

"Yeah. Kurenai-sensei stopped by to erect it about a week ago," he informed her as he followed her through the small path. Here, she could barely make out the watch tower covered with vines and ivy so it blended in with the nearby trees. Far up ahead, she could see the city of tents that housed the many shinobi living there. To the far right, she recognized the mess hall and all the way across the base, there was a small wooden building she knew was her own.

"Lady Tsunade did say she was sending someone good over," Shikamaru drawled as he emerged from the central tent. His lazy steps led him straight to Sakura. He firmly clasped one of her hands with both of his. Sakura eyed the cigarette in his mouth with disapproval but she also noted the deep shadows under her friend's eyes and kept her mouth shut. Every shinobi had his crutch. For Kakashi had his porn, Naruto had his ramen and Shikamaru had his cigarettes. She could begrudge Shikamaru at least that. After a moment, Shikamaru's smile faded and he eyed the three new recruits hovering unsurely behind Sakura. He shoved his free hand into his pocket as he plucked the cigarette out of his mouth.

"Ah, you're the replacements for Tenzou-taichou's* squad. He should still be in the mess hall," Shikamaru said, jabbing his cigarette toward a long building at the far corner of the camp. Sakura laughed quietly, drawing his gaze.

"You haven't changed, Shikamaru," she said. Shikamaru followed her gaze to his cigarette-turned-pointer and snorted.

"Neither have you," he replied. They stood together, watching the base camp slowly rise. Sleepy shinobi drifted out of their tents to the showers and the mess hall. Some shaded their eyes from the summer sun, cursing under their breaths. Sakura took in a deep breath of the sweet air and tilted her head up to watch the cloudless sky. From a distance, someone screamed "HARUNO-TAICHOU!" with glee. Several more voices joined. A swarm of shinobi swallowed her in tight hugs and laughter.

She was back.

* * *

><p>Reviews, as always, from you wonderful people is always appreciated. I'll be sure to clarify ages and current situations in later chapters.<p>

*Shiroi hane means white wing

*Taichou means Captain


	2. Arrowroot

Sorry for the shortage of writing. School's started up and it was my mistake to take three literature courses in one semester. But since things have settled down a little, I'll probably be able to start writing a little bit more. This chapter's not at all near satisfactory for me, but if I didn't get these ideas down, I'm pretty sure they would have turned into cancer or something.

As always, thank you to all my wonderful, patient readers. I hope you enjoy this chapter!

* * *

><p>"You're turning into an old spinster, Sakura."<p>

Sakura scowled as she tossed a handful of popcorn at Ino. Ino stuck her tongue out at her as she stuffed a bunch in her mouth, chewing as obnoxiously as possible.

"But seriously," Ino continued, munching loudly between words, "When are you going to snag yourself a man?" As if rubbing it in, the blonde happily wagged her finger in her friend's face, showing off the cute jade bracelet Chouji had bought for her. Sakura rolled her eyes as she pushed Ino's hand away.

"When people stop showing up in my hospital bleeding to death, you pig," Sakura dryly retorted.

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 2: Arrowroot

Sakura couldn't help but laugh as the men crowded around her. They shoved each other, trying to get some sort of contact with her. After some chaos, they all settled for passing her around, doling out tight hugs and big grins. Konohamaru, who was now a full head taller than her, squeezed her in a particularly long embrace, earning a barrage of insults from his teammates. When she was finally set back on her feet, she put her hands on her hips. There stood her squad, 10 bright-eyed ANBU; their black tattoos were still pitch dark on their skin.

"We didn't know you were coming back, boss!" Konohamaru blurted out and the others nodded in unison. Sakura rolled her eyes.

"I can't believe that all of you are still here. Your rotations ended a while ago," she shot back. Her remark was met with a scattering of laughter.

"It's not like any of us have wives to go back to. Besides, now that our favorite lady's back-" the cheeky response was cut short as several people rushed to clamp their hands over his mouth. Several wide eyes turned to her. It seemed that in her absence, none of them had forgotten her fierce right hook. Sakura held back a chuckle at their antics. But her expression sobered as she noticed the weapons held loosely in their hands. They were geared up in the standard ANBU vest and some had their masks hanging loosely from their necks.

"We were just about to head out for a quick scout. We'll be back by sundown, Haruno-taichou," someone spoke up, noticing her serious expression.

"Alright. We'll have a briefing once you get back since I see a couple new faces here. Come find me later. I'll be surveying the damage," she replied, pointing at the wooden clinic at the far end of the camp. With a scattering of salutes, her team took off into the woods. Sakura couldn't help but smile as she noticed Konohamaru take the lead as they bounded off tree branches. She stood, watching the men race off until they disappeared into the thick foliage.

"Hey, are you headed to the clinic?" Shikamaru called out as he ducked out of the central tent. Sakura turned on her heel as her friend crossed the camp to stand by her. He fished in the pocket of his vest for another cigarette and this time, Sakura retaliated by lightly smacking the back of his hand.

"No smoking in my clinic," she firmly said as she began walking. Shikamaru sighed but he followed alongside her with a faint smile, quietly dropping the offending cigarette.

"You're such a hard-ass, Sakura," he half-jokingly grumbled, earning a laugh from her.

"I know," she replied as they reached the narrow wooden building. For a moment, she simply stood outside, taking in the familiar cabin. The roughly-sewn linen curtains she had mounted last spring fluttered in the breeze. A small chuckle escaped her as she eyed her uneven stitching. As she climbed the wooden steps, the door exploded open and a pair of frantic honey-colored eyes stared out at her. At first, she couldn't quite register the face through the blood spattered across his skin. But when his hysterical chakra spurted out of him, she quickly recognized her apprentice.

"Takumi!" she exclaimed as the boy pulled her into the cabin. Kiyomizu Takumi had just turned seventeen a few months ago. He had ranked at top of his class in academics during the ninja academy but his combat skills were not nearly as proficient. Like the Haruno clan, his family had once been a small ninja clan that had become mostly civilian over many years. She had hand-picked the boy out of dozens of promising candidates because his healing skills and chakra control had been exceptional. His ability to handle high-stress situations, however… was less than perfect. He began pulling at his dark blonde hair as she followed him further into the medical building.

On the very last bed, one of the men from Shikamaru's team was sprawled out. His clawed hands twisted into the bloodied sheets. As he squinted up at the new visitors, he reached out a hand for Sakura.

"Haruno-taichou," he wheezed, his other hand scraping at the exposed skin on his stomach. His face turned oddly white for a moment and then he retched thick, dark blood all over the front of his shirt. Sakura heard Shikamaru curse quietly from somewhere behind her.

"When did this start?" she demanded, slipping into professional mode as she channeled chakra to her hands and laid them on the man's abdomen. As usual, when she assumed command, Takumi seemed to relax almost immediately.

"He was brought in last night for poisoning. I thought I had it under control. But this morning, he started complaining of stomach cramps and then just a few minutes ago, he started vomiting blood," Takumi reported, his anxious eyes studying her every move. Sakura sent pulses of chakra through the man's system, scouring every single cell for the source of his problem.

"Water!" she ordered, not looking up. She listened to her apprentice scurry around filling a basin with warm water and quickly dropping it beside her hand, sloshing droplets over her arm. Before he could apologize, she drew the water into a sphere around her hands and pressed it into the patient's stomach. He immediately arched off the bed, mouth snapping open in a loud groan of pain. She briefly glanced back and Shikamaru looped around to hold down his shoulders while Takumi pressed down on his legs. The man thrashed weakly as Sakura continued to shove the water through him, gathering the dark purple poison that had gathered in the depths of his upper intestines. Sweat beaded down her brow as she carefully sucked up every last bit of the toxin she could reach and painstakingly guided it out of the man. She just barely managed to release the now purplish-gray water in the basin before she lost control over the poison extraction completely.

Sakura sighed as she sat on the edge of an empty bed. As she watched, her patient's brow smooth out before he breathed a sigh of relief. His entire body relaxed, sinking into the thin mattress. Shikamaru paused to look into the full basin and make a face. He looked up at her, brow furrowed with disgust at the murky water swirling around. Sakura couldn't help but a laugh a little.

"Looks like you've been busy, Takumi," she remarked as she looked over at her apprentice. The boy smiled nervously, as if awaiting a lecture for his panicking. But Sakura patted his arm as she got to her feet.

"Good job keeping him hydrated and tending to his wounds. You clean up here. I'll take care of the patient. I've seen this poison before," Sakura said as she opened one of the cabinets and began rummaging through the various vials filled with dried herbs. She quietly muttered to herself as she grabbed a few ingredients and a clean mortar and pestle. With chemical formulas swirling around in her head, she set everything down on her desk and began measuring out the brittle leaves. She tossed in a few more things and then, with skilled fingers, took up the pestle and began grinding everything together. The dry grating of the stone against stone filled the quiet cabin. She vaguely listened to Takumi scampering about, wiping up blood and sterilizing surfaces.

"I don't know how you get by without me. This place is a mess," she lightly joked as she looked up. Shikamaru was leaning against the edge of her desk, watching her work with interest. But his expression was completely seriously when he met her gaze.

"It was rough. Shizune's good… but she's not you," he admitted. Sakura smiled as she gave the contents of the mortar one last good crush.

"Well, Shizune-senpai's been through a war before. I'm sure you would've been fine with her," she assured him as she poured clear liquid into the mixture. She stirred it well, watching with satisfaction as the edges bubbled a little.

"Not with the medicine she makes. They taste a million times worse than yours," Shikamaru muttered, scowling as he watched her pour the greenish-gray mixture into a glass. Sakura snorted as she skirted around him to reach the shinobi lying peacefully in the narrow bed.

"No sleeping yet. Drink this," Sakura instructed as she shook his arm. The man grunted as he lifted himself up on his elbows. Sakura placed a hand between his shoulder blades, steadying him as she tilted the glass against his lips. He gulped everything down in one go, grimacing and coughing as she set the empty cup on the nightstand.

"Get some sleep. The worst is over," she assured him as he flopped back on the bed and closed his eyes. Within moments, his peaceful snoring filled the room. Sakura smiled as she watched his serene expression. Her eyes drifted to the basin filled with dark liquid and they narrowed.

"Is this the first poison victim you've had?" she suddenly asked Takumi who froze in place at the sudden sharp tone in her voice. He thought back for a moment and then shook his head.

"We had another one last week but it wasn't nearly as extreme as this one," he replied. Sakura's eyes stared at the basin of poison-filled water for a moment. She looked over at Shikamaru whose face was creased in a frown as he caught on to her train of thought.

"They're refining it," she muttered to herself.

"I'll warn everyone to watch out for poisoned weaponry then," Shikamaru said and Sakura nodded. Shikamaru lingered for a few more minutes to catch up before he exited the cabin, leaving Sakura to check through inventory and skim through the recent reports that had been sent from Konoha. All the while, Takumi quietly scampered around, cleaning and sterilizing equipment with diligence.

"Takumi," she said and his head popped up from behind a bed, "We're going to have to make a lot of this antidote and distribute it to everyone here. We can't risk someone getting poisoned out in the field." Takumi's head bobbed in a nod before he went back to work. Sakura surveyed the quiet cabin for another moment and then she slipped out.

A few of the ANBU from other teams greeted her and she responded with quick nods before she reached the central tent. When she pushed the canvas flap aside, she was met with Yamato reclining in one of the folding chairs placed around the round table.

"Yamato-taichou, please wake up," Sakura sighed and he smiled good-naturedly.

"I wasn't sleeping, Sakura. I was wondering when you would come say hello," Yamato said as he sat up straight. Shikamaru's head popped into the tent and Sakura nodded once. With a harried sigh, Shikamaru took his place next to Yamato and both men looked expectantly up at her.

"Takumi and I are going to start producing more of that antidote. We're going to issue one dose to each of the soldiers here to be carried around at all times," Sakura announced. Yamato's thick eyebrows slanted downwards as he thought.

"Is that really necessary?" he asked. Sakura understood. Just mass-producing the antidote would take a lot of time and resources. But something nagged at the back of her mind. Something about the poison bothered her, like it was warning her of something even worse. And her intuition had proven right on more than one occasion.

"Why don't you just immunize them?" Shikamaru spoke up as the smoke from his cigarette filled the tent.

"Immunize them?" she repeated, turning the idea over in her head. After a minute, she crossed her arms over her chest and began pacing the dirt floor. Out of nowhere, she stopped and turned back to Shikamaru.

"But we can't have all 30 of them fighting off the vaccine at once," Sakura protested.

"We usually have at least 2 teams here. Why not do it in batches so we'll still have enough healthy guys left over in case something happens?" Yamato suggested. Sakura nodded as she considered the scenario in her head.

"It's up to you, Sakura. You're Supreme Boss Medic after all," Shikamaru added, squeezing in the ridiculous name someone had thought up during her last rotation. She tried to scowl at his levity, but all that came out was a smile. Her arms fell to her sides.

"Okay. We'll start with your team, Shikamaru," Sakura declared. After nods from the other two captains, she emerged from the central tent and made her way to a group of men chatting together. When she approached, she was greeted with smiles and a few cries of "welcome back".

"I need you to assemble everyone from Shikamaru-taichou's team at the medical cabin in 10 minutes," she said. The men looked puzzled but complied and scattered off to the rest of the base camp to rally their teammates. Sakura broke into a jog as she made her way back to the makeshift clinic. The door was propped open and Takumi was already busy at work trying to read through her scrawled antidote recipe.

"Change of plans. We're vaccinating them," Sakura announced, making Takumi jump. He stared at her blankly as she took the basin full of water and extracted poison.

"Um… is that even possible, sensei?" Takumi asked, bewildered as she gathered chakra to her hand. Sakura didn't reply as she pumped her fingers full of healing chakra and added it to the poison, watching it turn from dark purple to a lighter shade of lilac. As her apprentice nervously hovered near her, Sakura cut her palm open and let her blood drop into an empty petri dish. One drop of the light purple vaccine fell into the dish too, blooming black through the small sample of blood. Sakura met Takumi's stare with a smug smile.

An hour later, Sakura heaved a sigh as she bottled the rest of the vaccine in a glass flask. She handed it to her apprentice before settling in an empty chair. It always amazed her how many ANBU, full-grown men and women, were terrified of needles. She glanced around the cabin once. Not much had changed in her absence. There were four narrow hospital beds lined up against a wall. In the far corner was her sturdy wooden desk and chair that were both nearly unidentifiable under opened scrolls and books. On the opposite wall were metal cabinets with glass doors and wooden bookshelves filled with various medicines and supplies. In the back was a door that led to a tiny storage room she had used as her room two years ago. Just beside it was a deep metal sink stocked with plenty of soap.

"Take a break, Takumi," she ordered as she got to her feet.

"Sensei?"

"Go eat something and then get some sleep. Your dark circles are worse than mine," Sakura said as she picked up an old encyclopedia of illnesses left on her desk. The boy hesitated for a moment. But he had worked with her enough to know that there wasn't much use arguing with her. With a little bow, he slipped from the cabin, closing the door behind him. She hefted the heavy tome in her hand and slid it into the empty spot in one of the bookcases. A little curious, she crossed the small cabin and opened the door in the back. She half-expected it to be overrun with crates from Konoha and old books. Instead, it was just as she had left it.

When she and Naruto had arrived at the border at the start of the war, there had been a shortage of tents. While Naruto and some other familiar faces had offered to share with her, she had refused. Naruto snored and she didn't trust herself not to break a nose if hands found themselves in the wrong places during the night. So she had spent an entire day cleaning out the miniscule back room that was little more than a broom closet. In the end, she had found enough room to spread out her sleeping bag. The shelves were nice places to leave her personal items as long as she remembered not to hit herself in the head when she got up. Now, over six months later, the wood floor was swept clean and the few old scrolls and books she had left behind were left untouched. It was as if she had never left in the first place.

"There're tents open, you know," Shikamaru remarked from behind her. He was leaning against her desk, munching on a piece of beef jerky from the canteen.

"Yeah. It's just… this is… where I belonged," she replied. Shikamaru harrumphed in his chest but didn't really protest.

"Your boys should be getting back soon," Shikamaru began as Sakura unhooked her sleeping bag from her pack and shook it once to brush off any dust or dirt.

"Good," she replied, spreading it out on the floor. She heard Shikamaru heave a deep sigh.

"You're not sleeping tonight, are you," he guessed, probably eyeing the huge pile of work overflowing from her desk. Sakura got back on her feet, slapping the dust from her hands. She turned around to face him with a smile.

"Probably not," was her response.

* * *

><p>In her seven-month absence, a lot of things had gone uncared for. Sakura realized this as she slumped over and let her forehead hit the cool surface of her desk. It had already been three months since she had first arrived during one muggy summer day. Since then, it had been endless days of reviewing medical files, sending requests for supplies to Konoha and chasing down the people who needed follow-up after injuries. Somehow, these grown men and women were more stubborn than the little children who visited the hospital to get their shots.<p>

And then there were the strings of poisonings that had spread across the border. The two other bases scattered across the northern border of Fire country had all run into the unpleasant concoction. While the medics at the other bases, Ino and one of her former students, were competent enough to handle the poison, it was the nearby civilian villages that were hit the hardest. It disgusted her that these enemy shinobi had no qualms about attacking defenseless people and pillaging their villages.

"Your protégée's drinking again," Shikamaru sighed from outside the open window. Sakura groaned as she sat up, stretching her stiff arms over her head. She had yet to teach Takumi how to alter his body's metabolism to burn off the alcohol quickly. On top of that, he was naturally a lightweight, often leading to her spending the morning after nursing his hangover.

"We just got a wire from the Hokage that she's sending someone to replace Yamato-taichou in a week," Shikamaru added. Yawning, Sakura got to her feet and pushed her chair under the desk. She ambled over to the window and found Shikamaru leaning against the wall outside.

"Yamato-taichou's going home? I'm going to miss him," Sakura grumbled. Shikamaru didn't respond as he began rooting around in the pocket of his jounin vest. Sakura hung out the window to punch him in the shoulder.

"No smoking in my clinic," she sternly reminded him. Shikamaru arched his eyebrows at her.

"I'm not in your clinic," he argued but Sakura scowled down at him until he reluctantly released his cigarette and shoved his hands into his pockets.

"Anyway, you're heading to 1 tomorrow, right?" Shikamaru suddenly said and Sakura nodded wearily.

"Good luck. Get some rest, Supreme Boss Medic," Shikamaru drawled as he pushed off the wall.

There were three base camps spread along the northern border of Fire Country. She was currently at Base Camp 2 (simply called 2), which sat in between 1 and 3. While 2 sat just along the border with the relatively peaceful Waterfall village, 1 was directly on the border with Sound, making it the prime target for attack. 3 lined up with Hot Springs Country but still dealt with a lot of enemy shinobi sneaking over the border. Ino was the head medic at 1 and one of Sakura's former students named Kei managed 3. With the influx of soldiers wounded on the battlefield, Konoha's supply of medics had been forced to stretch thinly. And while Ino had grown into a good healer and Kei was talented, neither of them had enough experience to handle everything on her own. Every once in a while, one of the two other camps would call for Sakura's assistance and she had no choice but to oblige.

"Take some of your guys with you. Kiba told me he's been getting some unpleasant activity to the northeast," Shikamaru said, looking out into camp. Sakura nodded. After a few minutes, Shikamaru heaved a grand sigh.

"Good night, Sakura," he said as he walked off into the dark camp, towards the flicker of bonfires nearby. Sakura lingered at the window for another minute to enjoy the passing breeze before she headed outside. It was easy to find some of her boys since Konohamaru's chakra signature was a bright pinpoint of light. He was growing more and more like Naruto with each day. She found him, along with a group of his teammates, gathered around a campfire with a couple bottles of beer.

"Konohamaru," Sakura called out as she approached them. Almost immediately, they perked up, discreetly sliding the bottles of beer out of sight. She gave an amused huff but didn't comment.

"I'm heading out to 1 tomorrow. Konohamaru, gather four people and tell them that we're meeting at the south tower at dawn," she ordered and Konohamaru's face lit up with a boyish grin

"Got it, Haruno-taichou!" he exclaimed, throwing his beer bottle at one of his comrades and taking off across the camp. Shaking her head at his eagerness, Sakura greeted the remaining shinobi standing around the campfire and made her way to the mess hall on the other side of the basecamp. She wasn't surprised when the saw a faint glow of orange from one of the windows. She pushed past the open door and found a figure sitting at one of the long tables, huddled over a cold bowl of leftovers.

"Midnight snack?" she inquired as she sat at the table across from him.

"Slept through dinner," Kiba replied sleepily as he picked up a chunk of beef and popped it in his mouth. Sakura hummed noncommittally as she propped her face up in her hands, watching him eat. After a couple extra slurps, Kiba's annoyance at being stared at overpowered his hunger.

"Can I help you?" he inquired with a huff of amusement, looking up at Sakura from his meal.

"I'm just surprised to see you here. Weren't you supposed to be taking over for Gai-san at 1 right before I left?" Sakura asked as she picked at lint on her shoulder.

"Nah. They ended up picking Shino for the position because he's more level-headed. 'Sides, I'm not really a leader," Kiba explained with a shrug. She nodded once and they lapsed back into silence again. After a few more mouthfuls of food, Kiba seemed to remember something. His head perked up and he flapped his hand in her direction.

"So why're you back, Sakura?" Kiba demanded with a grin. Sakura tilted her head to the side.

She and Naruto had been one of the first soldiers sent to the borders to set up camps against enemy attacks. In fact, she and Naruto, along with Shikamaru, had been the original captains to establish Base Camp 2 when they were all just 18 years old. According to Konoha's laws, she and Naruto had rotated back home after a regular 2-year campaign. However, Shikamaru had chosen to remain on the front lines like many of the other soldiers.

"Why'd I come back?" Sakura repeated as she turned over the question in her head.

"And without Naruto. I thought you two were joined at the hip," Kiba added, pointing his chopsticks at her. Sakura shot him a dirty look and he immediately raised his hands in a pacifying gesture.

"Not in a dirty way. I just meant you guys are close," he hastily tacked on, diffusing her anger.

"You know, I don't even know where Naruto is right now. Apparently it's a top-secret mission," Sakura said and Kiba's eyebrows lifted.

"So top-secret that Tsunade-sama won't tell you?" asked Kiba, disbelief coloring his tone. Sakura nodded with a little shrug.

"And I'm here because I've been at the hospital tending to all the poor kids you guys were sending home because you couldn't heal them out in the field. Some of my medics have been pulling double-shifts on a regular basis," Sakura said, scowling at the tabletop.

"While you're pulling triple-shifts?" Kiba wedged in half-jokingly. Sakura laughed too as she looked up at him. But there was a tinge of sadness that he must have caught because he suddenly stopped smiling. A small pause stretched between them before Kiba opened his mouth again. But before he could speak, Sakura cut in.

"It's good talking to you, Kiba. But I've got to get some sleep since I'm leaving at dawn. Enjoy your food," she said as she patted him on the shoulder. His brows furrowed, since he obviously had something to say. But when Sakura smiled at him, he let out an exasperated breath and gave her the usual grin that revealed his sharp canines.

"Night, Sakura," he sighed, waving her off.

The walk back to the small clinic was uneventful, although she caught one of the younger recruits on duty dozing comfortably in a folding chair. As she passed, Sakura kicked his chair, jolting the boy awake. His head swiveled around comically as he woke with a snort, face flushing with humiliation. After a quick stop to the showers to wash up, she trudged back to the wooden building, changed into one of Naruto's old shirts, and settled in her sleeping bag. She was asleep almost before she closed her eyes.

Too soon, though, it was time to leave. She dressed mechanically, pulling on her armor and wrapping her weapon pouch in place. Eyes still heavy with sleep, she could barely keep them open when she groped for her katana in the darkness and finally managed to sling it across her body. When she opened the door to her small room, she was surprise to find Takumi standing in the clinic with a cup of hot coffee.

"Ah, my pupil, you've learned well," she sighed half-seriously as she accepted the warm mug and gulped down the contents as fast as she could without burning the inside of her throat. She lingered for another minute to calm her apprentice down before she headed out to the south end of camp where there was already a small group of people waiting. They greeted her enthusiastically, some of them fresh out of the ANBU training program and excited to go on their first real missions. Konohamaru took his usual place to her right as she briefed them on the details of their mission before she took off into the thick foliage.

The nearly 11-hour trip went by rather quickly, interrupted only once for a short break when Konohamaru had exclaimed that he needed to find a nice bush before his bladder exploded. Soon, Sakura felt the ripples of one of Kurenai's genjutsu settle over her shoulders like a fine net of spider web. As always, she was impressed by the precision of the older woman's technique. Had she not been informed earlier of the defensive barrier, she might not have noticed it at all. She channeled chakra to her temples, feeling the threads of control wither away. When she opened her eyes, her team was doing the same. A little further ahead, there was a shrill bird call that didn't quite fit in with the other chatter of animals in the forest. The radio attached to the collar of her uniform crackled a little as she pressed the little button on the side.

"Shiroi hane," she murmured into the miniscule microphone before she raised her hand, signaling the rest of the squad to stop. After a minute, the leaves in the canopy rustled above them. Before her mind could react, chakra was rushing down her arm in a hot surge of adrenaline-fueled energy. The angry crackle of energy pierced through the air as her hand swung in an arc, stopping just a fraction of an inch before the pale neck that appeared in front of her.

"Haruno," a sickeningly familiar voice greeted her calmly. The white mask on his face held the dark blue marks of an owl etched in sharp, sinister strokes. For an instant, her chakra flared white-hot but she reluctantly lowered her hand. But her gaze remained fierce as she stared into the dark slits in his mask.

"Hyuuga-_taichou_," she greeted him, placing emphasis on his title. He must have caught on because he hesitated for a moment before he spoke.

"Well, Haruno-taichou, we're glad that you've arrived safely. Allow me to escort you back to camp," he smoothly said before he turned on his heel and gracefully took off in the opposite direction.

If given the opportunity, she would have wrung his neck or at least knocked out a couple of his teeth. Luckily, when they arrived at the west entrance of camp, she was greeted by two warm faces that took off the edge of her anger.

"Good thing you're here. Ino's been a mess lately," Tenten greeted her as they exchanged tight hugs. The scrolls tucked into the front pockets of her vest dug into Sakura's side painfully, making her wince. Tenten grinned apologetically as she patted one of the bigger lumps. Since the women stationed at the border were so scarce, the two female captains had easily bonded during their exchanges. Beside Tenten was the green-haired third captain stationed at Base camp 1.

Isami Shigehito was a few years older than the Rookie 9. He came from a small but respected clan within Konoha well-known for their skill with swords.

"Ah, there she is. Good to see you, Haruno," Shigehito exclaimed with his usual roguish grin. Sakura stared pointedly at the cigarette in his mouth. Shigehito sighed, rolling his brown eyes as he snubbed the offending cigarette out under his boot. It was only then that Sakura smiled and gave him a one-armed hug. They exchanged the usual greetings, asking about friends and sharing new gossip. The men in her squad dispersed, mingling happily with the comrades they hadn't seen in a while. Only Konohamaru stuck to her side with a vigilant gaze before Sakura glanced his way and smiled.

"Go find Moegi, kid. Take it easy for the night," Sakura ordered, laughing at the way Konohamaru's face lit up. He bowed hastily before he stumbled off into the camp, undoubtedly honing in on his girlfriend's chakra signature. After a few more minutes of chatting, Sakura quietly excused herself and weaved her way through the crowds of tents and people until she reached the canvas medical tent in the center of camp. When she ducked under the tent, she was promptly pushed back by angry, clawing hands.

"No outside personnel! We're in the middle of a procedure!" Ino barked. But her hands froze for a minute as she seemed to take in the presence behind the canvas. Another moment passed before Ino poked her head through flap and peered up at Sakura with bloodshot eyes.

"What the hell took you so long, Forehead?" Ino demanded. Sakura rolled her eyes as she pushed past her friend and into the tent. She took in the patient heaving up dark chunks of red into the basin by his side. The stench of flesh hung thick in the air as Ino's two assistants frantically scurrying around drawing a giant seal on the dirt floor.

"….wow," Sakura finally commented, putting her hand on Ino's shoulder.

"That's what I said," Ino sighed, wiping her hand across her forehead. Sakura nodded sympathetically before she grabbed Ino's hand and pulled her back into the fray.

The months flowed into each other that way. If she wasn't healing people at her own base, she was running around to the other ones to help manage some emergency. Through the hours of medical records to fill in and inventory to re-organize, she barely had time to sit down and think. In fact, she barely had time to miss Naruto. So when a letter arrived for her from Naruto, she really didn't know what to expect.

It had been close to three months since she had arrived. Takumi was dozing peacefully in his chair with a thick medical textbook resting in his lap. Dried blood was still crusted on his forearms from where he had helped her suture up a pair of scouts after an ambush. A light sigh escaped her mouth as she picked up the crisp envelop in one hand and a clean kunai in the other. With one neat motion, she slit the top open and plucked a surprisingly thin sheet of paper out.

_Sakura-chan,_

_We found him._

_-Naruto_

Takumi's head jerked up when the kunai fell to the floor with a loud metallic clang. Hot tears were welling up in her eyes while her throat suddenly felt unbelievably dry.

"Sensei?" Takumi sputtered, bewildered. He knelt beside her, putting a hand on her shoulder. But Sakura couldn't hear him. She couldn't see anything except the short letter clenched in her hand. Even when the ink began to mix with her tears and run, she could still see the words perfectly because they were seared perfectly into her memory.

And she couldn't tell whether the horrible throb in her chest was one of relief or terror.

* * *

><p>Reviews are always appreciated!<p> 


	3. Pinks

"What's your dream, sensei?" Takumi suddenly asked. Sakura's steady hands never stopped rotating the mortar as her pestle continued crushing leaves as she looked up at her apprentice. Her eyebrows rose.

"Why the sudden question, Takumi?" she queried in response. She took a moment to look back down at her work. Dipping her pinky into the thick paste that had formed, she spread it on the small paper cut on the back of her left hand. With a quiet hiss, the skin began stretching tightly around the spot, cells frantically dividing to fill the gap.

"Just… curious, I guess?" Takumi replied. Sakura smiled as she transferred the mixture into a glass jar for storage. As she handed the container to him, Sakura patted his shoulder.

"I guess, my dream is to stop having crazy dreams."

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 3: Pinks

During the week, somewhat of an unspoken agreement developed that nobody disturbed the clinic unless absolutely necessary. And necessary was defined as somewhere along the lines of having a kunai stabbed through the chest. So the usual array of noses and fingers broken during sparring were quietly treated by the fumbling apprentice in his tent. It wasn't that Sakura was any less agreeable than usual. She could still set and heal a broken bone in a couple minutes with only the smallest stab of pain during the procedure. And it wasn't that she was any less tolerant of the shameless flirts that some of the younger recruits tested out on her.

It was just…something about her expressions seemed a little empty. Her pleasant smiles and loud, clear laughter were all somewhat muted, like someone had placed a sheet of plastic wrap on top of her.

Although no one said anything, Sakura felt the sharp decrease in the number of people filtering into her clinic every day and she was grateful if a little lonely. So all the time usually spent tending to daily mishaps was channeled into researching poisons and experimenting with new antidotes. Four days after she had received the letter, half of the flat surfaces in the wooden cabin were cluttered with glass flasks and thick books with scribbles filling the margins.

It was only when Takumi cautiously edged his way into the clinic did she realize that she had worked through the night without eating or sleeping at all. After some persuasion from Takumi, Sakura reluctantly put her work down and headed to the building on the north side of camp.

Unlike many of the other bases scattered across the borders of Fire Country, Base Camp 2 had been converted from the remains of a village that had been abandoned long ago instead of constructed from scratch. The old schoolhouse was mostly dismantled and rebuilt to serve as the mess hall while the communal bath house had been renovated from its molding shambles. The modest clinic had once served as an apothecary, leaving behind shelves for storage and a small sink in the back that often came in handy for emergency scrub-ups. The rest of the buildings had been taken down and the materials used to construct the 4 watchtowers that kept vigil over the camp and the forest beyond.

Since it was still early in the morning, the baths were deserted, leaving Sakura with plenty of privacy. She stopped by her small room in the back of the clinic to pick up a towel and a change of clothes and then made the quick journey to the bathhouse. The generator in the back had been shut off for the night so the inside of the building was dark. As she walked past, she performed a small fire jutsu and lit up the candles mounted along with walls. Barefoot, she stopped at the round bath at the far end of the echoing room and shed her clothes, leaving them in a neat pile in one of the cubbies lining the walls. When she stepped into the warm water, her tense muscles seemed to sigh with relief. She sank low into the tub, thoroughly washing herself with the soap that had been shipped from Konoha a few weeks earlier. But after a while, she reclined against the wooden side of the tub and closed her eyes, relaxing in the steaming water. She closed her eyes for an instant, letting her heavy head fall back.

"TAICHOU!"

Her head jerked up as the cry bounced off the walls. She sprang out of the water, yanking the towel out of the cubby and hastily winding it around her middle.

"What's wrong?" she demanded as she saw Konohamaru running towards her in the dim light.

"It's… it's… You need to come outside," he said, eyes wide with excitement before he ran back out to let her dress, nearly slipping on the tile floor as he went. Sakura hurriedly hooked her bra in place before she forced her arms through a black bandeau and yanked on her panties. After pulling on her tight black leggings, she wrung her hair out as best as she could, jammed her wet toes into her boots and grabbed her shirt before running out of the bathhouse. Her feet carried her through camp as her water-wrinkled fingers fumbled to clasp the buckles of her skirt. But as she reached the doorway, the tired dredges of her chakra picked up three signatures that made her freeze in her tracks.

"Oh." The simple syllable caught in her throat as she raced to the south entrance of the camp, drenched hair wetting the back of her neck. There was a small crowd gathered there and she couldn't really see well over the tall silhouettes of the men there. But as soon as they saw her, they backed away, forming a path from her straight to the new arrivals. Tears sprang up in her eyes as she caught sight of a brilliant glint of gold.

"Oh," she said again. This time, it was almost a sob and Naruto turned at the sound of her voice.

"Sakura-chan," Naruto called out, his face splitting into a grin. She couldn't find the voice to say anything back as she ran and threw her arms around his neck. He put his arms around her, lifting her up and spinning her around. Even her laugh was breathless and quiet as he squeezed her so hard that she almost couldn't breathe. When Naruto set her back on the ground, Sakura immediately found Sai and grabbed him in a tight hug. As expected, Sai awkwardly patted her back until she let him go. At the sight of his slightly befuddled expression, she giggled a little. Naruto chortled too, in extremely high spirits as he threw his arm over her shoulder and held her close to his side.

"Look who we brought!" Naruto proudly announced. At this, Sai took a step to the side, leaving a clear path in front of her. And even though she had recognized his chakra signature, even though she knew he was standing, watching her, she found it incredibly difficult to tear her gaze from her best friends to face the person they had brought along with him.

Sasuke's dark eyes were blank as he stared back at her. But unlike Sai's often bland expressions, something about the emptiness in Sasuke's face made her cringe. His dark hair framed his haggard expression like a black crown. The deep shadows under his eyes spoke of something other than sleepless nights, something more sinister and festering deeper than she could see. On instinct, she tensed, hand straying down her leg to touch the top of her missing kunai holster.

It was foolish to think that he didn't see. Sasuke had always seen everything, even when they were younger. She didn't know whether he didn't see her as a threat or he honestly didn't care, but Sasuke took a step towards her and it took all of the willpower in her body not to take a step back. Naruto's arm tightened reassuringly around her and she took a deep breath. When Sasuke took another step, she smelled the distinctive stench of cigarette smoke. Out of the throng of suspicious stares, Shikamaru emerged and came to stand to her right.

"Sasuke, the Hokage sent me a letter about your situation a few days ago. Are you coming here to serve willingly?" Shikamaru called out and Sasuke's gaze drifted to him in a slow, almost leisurely manner. His eyebrows slanted low over his eyes, mouth thinning into a hard line.

"Yes," Sasuke replied in such a muted voice that she almost didn't hear him. But Shikamaru seemed satisfied because he nodded deeply as he let his cigarette drop. After he ground the smoldering bits of tobacco out under his heel, he looked Sasuke full in the face.

"Naruto has taken full responsibility for you. You'll report to him from now on," Shikamaru said before he turned. He eyed the rest of the shinobi standing around and frowned.

"Back to your posts. This isn't a summer camp," he said in a louder voice and there was a moment of hesitation before they all went off in clumps, drifting back to the mess hall or off to the sparring grounds. He cast one last glance at Sakura over his shoulder and she gave him a tremulous smile. As Shikamaru slouched off, Sakura's eyes were drawn back to Sasuke who hadn't moved at all. They watched each other, her with wariness and him with a strange hollowness that made her stomach clench painfully.

Finally, Sasuke took three long strides toward her and his hand rose. She sucked in another deep breath through her mouth, her throat going dry. Arm shaking, she reached out and grasped his hand. His palm was dry and cool and hers felt all sweaty and clammy. A quiet noise came from somewhere and it startled her. It was a high-pitched sound, breathy and whimpering. And when Naruto's hand that had been holding her suddenly turned to patting her head consolingly, she realized that her chest felt constricted, like a giant fist was closing around her rib cage. Another stifled huff escaped her mouth and she tightened her hold on Sasuke's hand, like if she let go, he would disappear again. From the way his expression stiffened, she knew that she was hurting him. But it was Sai standing just a little ways behind him, his face blank with confusion, his fingers gripping a sealed scroll that brought the tears.

It was her boys, all together again. It was Naruto's grin and Sasuke's silence and the Sai's tense smile that tethered them all. And even though Sasuke's expression was all wrong and his hand was somehow so much bigger than she remembered, everything was right.

When a few tears fell from her eyes, she felt Naruto shudder against her and she realized that he was crying too.

* * *

><p>Yamato left that morning and Naruto easily reclaimed his old position. His old squad was ecstatic to see him since most of the original members of the team remained. Although Konoha's laws required a 2-year rotation for all shinobi drafted, most often, they chose to stay far longer than that. In fact, their enthusiasm was so great that they seemed almost able to forgive Sasuke's presence. For the time being, they seemed to ignore him, which was better than anyone could have asked for.<p>

As it turned out, Sai had been sent along with Naruto to assure that Sasuke safely transferred hands. Although it had been sanctioned by the Hokage herself, Sakura had a guess that it had more to do with the elders than anything else.

"Are you heading back already?" Sakura asked when she wandered out from the clinic, wiping her hands on the front of her apron. The smell of herbs clung to her as she sat next to Sai on a crudely-constructed bench made from dead tree branches. There was a biting chill to the morning air that would soon fade in the hot autumn sun but the whispers of winter were already creeping in. She pulled the sleeves of her dark shirt over her hands before peering over at Sai in his short-sleeved shirt under his grey armor. Just looking at him gave her sympathetic goose bumps.

"I'll leave in a few hours. I'm supposed to report back directly after the traitor-" Sai stopped when Sakura jabbed her elbow into his ribcage.

"When _Uchiha_ changes hands," Sai amended, "But we made good time so I have some time to rest."

"I'm sorry. I was listening. But how the hell are you not cold wearing that?" Sakura said after he finished speaking and Sai looked down at his arms.

"Why are you ogling my body, Ugly?" Sai demanded in a serious tone and Sakura scowled at him.

"Do you want to die before you make it back to Konoha, Sai?" she retorted as she cracked her knuckles threateningly. His dark eyes flickered to her hands and he cleared his throat, undoubtedly remembering the many times she bashed him into submission during their first few years as a team.

"No need to resort to violence. I understand that many people suffer from lack of sexual release during their duty at the border," Sai said and Sakura turned red as she punched him in the arm.

"Ugh! You're so weird!" Sakura groaned as she punched him one more time for good measure.

"Sai, just shut up before Sakura-chan ends up really killing you," Naruto sighed as he emerged from the central tent and wedged himself between the two. The stench of Shikamaru's cigarette smoke wafted off of him and Sakura gave him an exasperated smile. Although he put up a front of indifference, she knew that Shikamaru was smoking up a storm to relieve his stress.

"Knowing those elders, if Sai ended up dead, they would blame the whole thing on Sasuke and have him locked up," the blonde joked and Sakura couldn't help but snicker a little.

"Actually, if you say that Sakura here did it, they might believe you," Sai insisted and Sakura turned to glare at him.

"Sai, I'm only going to not kill you because you're my friend and I love you," she simply said in a low voice that made Naruto roar with laughter.

After a little while, Sai stood, hoisting his light backpack onto his shoulder. Shikamaru emerged from the central tent, smoke exiting in a large cloud after him. Avoiding Sakura's stern gaze, he handed over a scroll to Sai that was sealed with a bloody thumbprint.

"Have a safe journey, man," Naruto said, slapping Sai on the shoulder. Sai nodded before he turned to Sakura. She dug into her pocket to pull out a vial filled with clear liquid. She tucked it into Sai's vest, firmly fastening the clasp so that it wouldn't fall out.

"There have been some poisonings in the area. Be careful," she said as she squeezed him in a short hug.

"Stay ugly, Sakura," Sai replied with a smile that only pulled up at one side of his mouth. Rolling her eyes, she put her hands on his shoulders and walked with him all the way to the south entrance of camp. There, Sai ruffled her hair before he took off into the treetops. She stood by the watchtower, feeling for his strong chakra bobbing in the foliage until he grew too far away to feel. When she turned around, Naruto was staring off into the forest with a frown scrunching his face. Arms crossed over her chest, Sakura nudged Naruto in the side. His forehead still furrowed, Naruto lifted his arm and hugged her to his side.

"Holy shit- take a shower, Naruto. You smell awful," Sakura exclaimed, trying to twist out of his grasp. She hadn't noticed it at first, simply elated that her best friend had joined her, but now that she had calmed down, she was hit full in the face by the stench of sweat and dirt that rolled off of him. Chuckling heartily, Naruto tightened his hold on her, rubbing her face into his shirt.

"You're disgusting!" she snarled as she jammed her elbow into his side and wrenched free. Naruto cringed as he held his ribs, poking gingerly at them. But Sakura rolled her eyes, knowing she hadn't done more than given him a good bruise.

"Ouch," Naruto said but she shrugged unapologetically.

"Go take a bath, Uzumaki-taichou," she replied as she walked off.

By then, the news of the two new arrivals had spread to everyone else. And though there were grumbles and complaints between many, it was mostly shunted aside by Naruto's team's exuberance. Their loud shouts of joy filled the air, mingling with alcohol as the sun went down. By nightfall, most had gathered in the mess hall to partake in the crates of beer and sake that had been shipped from home. From the window of the clinic, Sakura saw the golden lights inside the wooden building shimmering and dancing.

"Are you alright, sensei?"

Sakura sighed heavily as she sat on the edge of her desk. Her apprentice was lying in an empty bed and reading from one of her thick books. He rolled onto his back to look up at her. There was a pen held in his right hand, ink smearing across his fingers.

"Huh? Oh…. I'm fine," she automatically said, not really paying attention. She knew without seeing who was in the mess hall, happily celebrating. And even if she wasn't sure then, the occasional laughs and shouts that carried between the buildings let her know that at least Naruto was enjoying himself. She could join them, easily fit herself in and laugh and drink and maybe bruise a few prides in arm-wrestling contests. But the noise and light didn't appeal to her as much as it should have. When she looked around the clinic, she realized that the dim quiet of the place she normally loved wasn't what she wanted either.

"I'm going to get some air," Sakura vaguely said to Takumi as she slipped her boots on and stepped out of the clinic. The cool night air enveloped her as she weaved around the tents and campfires set up in clusters. She came across a small group of her own men sitting around a low fire, passing around an ice-filled bucket filled with beer bottles. Laughing and patting the boulders they sat on, they asked her to join. But she simply plucked two cold drinks from the bucket and went off, ruffling one of the men's hair as she walked past. She cut through camp until she reached a fire nestled below the shade of a tall tree.

"Hey," she said as she approached. The wood still glowed inside the circle of stones, giving off some heat as she drew closer. She had felt him sitting at one of the boulders jutting out of the ground before she saw him. Sasuke was hunched over, elbows on his knees, head bowed low: the pose of a sinner before an angry god. When she spoke, he slowly lifted his head. He had undoubtedly felt her long before she had sensed him. Sasuke had always been that way, been one step ahead of her. She handed him a beer before she settled on the other side of the boulder. She could almost feel the heat from his back, almost sense the tension in his muscles.

"Drink up. Tomorrow's going to be hell," she told him as she snapped the top off her own bottle. When she twisted around and held out her bottle, he didn't reciprocate. It was only when she nudged his arm with the cold beer that his head turned towards her.

"Cheers," she insisted. Sasuke's sigh was long and drawn out as he held up his drink to her. She clinked the glass bottles together with a smile. Turning back around, she took a swig and coughed a little as the beer went down the wrong pipe. After she cleared her throat, she sipped again, feeling the subtle warmth trickle down into her stomach.

"Ah. Look at the sky," Sakura sighed as she tilted her head back. Away from the village, a billion new pinpricks of light made themselves known. They glittered in the vast sky, diamonds against black silk, or maybe granules of sand swept away into shadowy ocean tides. She could never decide which one it was more like.

"What are you doing here?" Sasuke's voice was raspy, quiet, as if he hadn't used it in a while. It was hollow, lacking the quiet dignity he had always commanded. Sakura swallowed more beer and tapped the bottle against her thigh. The condensation wet the fabric of her leggings, leaving a cool kiss on her skin.

"I outrank you, grumpy. I can be wherever I want to be," she replied.

"No. I mean… why are you talking to me?" Sasuke clarified in the same raw, soft voice that pierced the air between them. It wasn't quite sadness. It was closer to weariness, a heaviness that smothered and suffocated. Sakura drew her leg up to her chest, hugging it with her free arm. She shifted at the same time that he did and their shoulders bumped. The way he flinched back reminded her of animals that had been abused by their owners. He curled back into himself, wounded and tender but too stubborn to say anything.

"That guy Sai told me that I hurt you and Naruto too much. He said that I was unforgivable." At this, Sakura laughed out loud, the sound startling a nearby bird out of its hiding place.

"Sai's such an asshole without meaning to be," she muttered mostly to herself.

"And don't forget, Sasuke; Naruto and I are idiots. We don't know how to give up," Sakura added as she stood. She drained her bottle and tossed it into the nearby trash bin. When she turned back to Sasuke, he was watching her with an expression like he was in immense pain. Shaking his head, he dumped out the rest of his beer onto the dying embers. Placing her hand on his shoulder, she looked up at the sky again. He looked up too, his arm tensing from the effort not to recoil.

"Welcome back, Sasuke-kun."

The next morning, Sakura washed up and dressed just as the rest of the base camp woke. She was on a strange mixture of caffeine and adrenaline that kept her from sleeping much at all. Clad in black pants and a long-sleeved blue shirt, she stuck her feet into her boots and gathered her damp hair into a ponytail at the back of her neck. When she stepped out of her back room, she found Takumi slumped over at her desk, his cheek pressed firmly against the page of the same book he had been studying rigorously since the night before. She snorted as she grabbed a clean blanket from the cabinet and draped it over him.

"You too?" Shikamaru asked in greeting when she pushed past the flap of the central tent. The air was already thick with smoke. She nodded wearily as she watched Shikamaru grind his cigarette out under his heel. He looped around the table to tie the flap up to let fresh air in. As the blue-gray haze began to clear, Sakura rolled up the sleeves of her shirt. He fell heavily into the chair across from hers, rubbing roughly at his scratchy beard.

"You okay?" Sakura asked, eying the maps scattered across the table. There were lines and scribbled crisscrossing over the pages, marking and predicting and charting out possibilities that only a mind as acute as Shikamaru's could manage all at once.

"Just got another wire from 1. Ino says she's got the same poisonings in some of her guys. But she says that antidote you sent isn't doing anything. And Isami says they've had a lot of skirmishes with Oto these past few days," Shikamaru sighed as he pushed over a map littered with red arrows and X's. Sakura traced the paths with her finger.

"I have to go," Sakura said, crossing her arms over her chest. Still, even as she spoke, she eyed the thick concentration of enemy groups swarming the path between 2 and 1.

"Sakura, you are the single best medic this village has. If they take you out-"

"That's the plan, isn't it?" Naruto interrupted as he ducked into the tent. His expression was grim as he sat in the third chair. Shikamaru rubbed his hands over his face.

"My boys can do this. This is what we've trained them for," Sakura insisted.

"Sakura-chan, this won't be some training drill. You and your boys would get destroyed out there," Naruto countered with hard eyes. It took a long time to convince them. Shikamaru was right, of course, but both he and Naruto knew Sakura would never choose her safety over the lives of her comrades. So after nearly two hours of debating back and forth, Naruto and Shikamaru reluctantly agreed.

"We'll leave at sundown, use the dark as cover," Sakura said, leaving little room for argument as she stood.

"If you die, I'll kill you Haruno," Shikamaru called after her as he reached into his pocket for a cigarette. The three of them let out hard laughs, each trying not to reveal fear. When Sakura gathered her team to brief them, she could see their excitement. Despite their attempts to appear serious, she picked up on the twitches of their smiling mouths and the jittery legs. When an older ANBU had taken over her team while she was in Konoha, since they no longer had to accompany her between camps, they had not had much opportunity to get out. And though most of the men in her team were only one or two years younger than her, if not older than her, their undying devotion was palpable.

"And I need you to watch out for poisoned weapons."

"I thought you vaccinated us all, taichou," one of the older men interjected. Sakura bit the inside of her lip and the smiles suddenly vanished.

"Something's changed," she quietly replied. Her eyes passed over each face and she watched, almost with satisfaction, as their gazes hardened, sensing danger. Sakura cleared her throat.

"We'll meet at the western entrance at sunset. Dismissed."

Only Konohamaru lingered. Despite him being one of the youngest in her squad, she had seen him throughout the meeting. Dark eyes sharp with concern, he had taken in all her words without chatting to his teammates. He hesitated, mouth opening like he wanted to say something. But when their eyes met, he simply lowered his head in a bow and walked off.

Sakura went back to the clinic. At some point, Takumi had put away the blanket and the book, leaving everything as tidy as she had left it. Sakura swept her hand over an empty bed and smoothed out a slightly wrinkled sheet as she passed. She stood in the middle of the small wooden structure, looking over her lines of books and shining glass bottles. She sensed a chakra signature in the doorway that had been so deeply ingrained in her to fear that she automatically tensed up, muscles preparing for combat. But after an extra second, her brain reminded her body to relax, that it was only-

"Sasuke-kun," Sakura said as she turned. Even though he was so tall and his body so strong from years of combat, something about his presence in the doorway felt shriveled.

"Is something the matter?" she asked when Sasuke didn't say anything. He took a step forward, looking around with red eyes filled with suspicion. She put her hands on her hips, rolling her weight onto her left leg.

"My side… hurts… That kid told me to come to you," Sasuke slowly said. Sakura had almost forgotten that every new soldier out here was given a check-up, usually by her young apprentice who had more free time. Sakura turned and found Sasuke's file sitting at the desk where Takumi had slept. She sifted through the papers, reading off the short list of missions he had completed as a genin before she moved on to Takumi's report. Not looking up at him, Sakura motioned for Sasuke to come closer. His footfalls, though muted and far apart, were steady, almost reassuring. She could hear his soft breathing when she finally finished reading and set the file back down on her desk.

"Sorry, my hands are a little cold," Sakura warned him as she slipped her left hand under his shirt while gathering chakra to her palm. His chakra automatically rallied, pushing her out. When she fixed him with a frustrated look, she felt his energy slowly dissipate to let her continue her examination. Part of her knew it wasn't his fault. She had originally been a genjutsu-type. It was natural to try to repel foreign chakra to shatter illusions. It was necessary even.

"How you do break four ribs and not go to a hospital?" she huffed as she found the source of all the inflammation. She carefully lifted his shirt to reveal a faint splotch of burgundy on his ribcage. Tough, lean muscle covered his body but the sharp jut of his bones under his white skin almost hurt her to look at. The occasional scar interrupted his skin, a raised line on his hip, an X over the right side of his stomach. It took effort to stop herself from running her fingers along each one. Each one was a memory that she had missed, a story she would probably never know.

"There's quite a bit of scarring around the area. I'm guessing this was some sort of rough stabbing and twisting motion. These three are okay but I'm going to have to re-break this bottom one. You'll be out of commission for about a week," she explained, tapping her pointer finger on the rib in question. Sasuke eyed her without saying anything. But she had been working with hardened veterans for years now and she recognized the glimmer of suspicion.

"Oh please. I could have killed you the minute you let me touch you. Besides, if I was going to try to kill you, I'd go straight for the throat," she scoffed. Trying to lighten the air between them, she glanced up at him to offer a nervous smile. Something about the blank way he regarded her made her experienced fingers a little unsure. That hadn't changed. Sasuke had always had the power to make her feel smaller than she was. Even when he nodded his assent, Sakura hesitated for an extra second. Then, gathering a little chakra to her pointer and middle fingers, she rapped those two fingers against the rib, neatly snapping the bone. Sasuke blinked a few times in rapid succession, the only indication that he had felt anything.

"I did this once for Naruto and he started yelling and complaining that he was dying," Sakura said mostly for the sake of breaking the silence as she pressed her palm against his side and began healing.

"It didn't hurt," Sasuke quietly replied, startling her. A smile tugged at her mouth as she continued working.

"I know. That big baby," she snickered as she retracted her hand.

"I'm going to be gone tomorrow so I won't be able to check on it. Stay away from any really strenuous activities and it should heal the rest of the way on its own," Sakura instructed him. Sasuke nodded and then the same awkward silence fell over them. She cleared her throat somewhat unnecessarily before she suddenly became occupied with rubbing a spot of dirt off one of the glass panes on her storage cabinet. Even though she pretended to be focused on other things, Sakura clearly felt Sasuke watching her for a minute before he quietly exited the cabin.

After another captains' meeting and dinner, Sakura stood inside the clinic, patiently wrapping her kunai holster in place on her right thigh. She patted the bindings once to check how secure they were before she slipped her black mesh shirt on over her bandeau. The brush of the slightly rough material tingled as she fixed her sleeve. As she bent over to slide extra weapons into her boots, there was a quiet knock on the open door.

"Hi Kiba. Come in," she said without looking up. His feet clomped across the rough wood boards before they stopped a few feet from her. He waited for her to finish adjusting her boots and straighten before he spoke. Kiba's hair was damp and he smelled faintly of soap. The scar on his right cheek seemed to glow in the low lamplight.

"When do you think you'll be back?" Kiba finally asked. Sakura stuck her hands into gloves, tugging at the edges to make sure they fit snugly. As she flexed her fingers, Sakura looked up.

"Hopefully in two days. I'm not sure how long it'll take to handle the situation. Why do you ask?" Sakura responded as she turned to pull her ANBU vest on. As she slipped her head through the opening, she thought she heard Kiba speak. When her head popped out, she smiled apologetically.

"Sorry. What was that?" she asked.

"I asked if you were seeing anyone," Kiba said. They stood in silence for a moment. She hesitated, remembering Neji's cold expression as he turned to leave her house. A long breath left her.

"I'm not," she firmly told him. Thinking for a moment, she spoke again.

"I'm sorry," she added. Kiba didn't seem at all discouraged. He let out a light-hearted sigh with an expression that almost made it seem as if he had fully expected the rejection.

"I figured. Just making sure. Is it my fault? I've gotten better, I swear," Kiba joked and she couldn't help but laugh.

"No. It's not. It's just…. I'm not really interested in getting involved with anyone right now," she replied. Kiba nodded as he took in her words. Sakura fastened her sword to her back and tugged on the buckle once to secure it. When she turned back to Kiba, he had his arms crossed over his chest, watching her with a curious expression.

"You regret it?" he asked.

"What? That you were my first? No, Kiba. Never," Sakura told him. They exchanged secret smiles, from knowing something that no one else did. They had both been 17. It had been a short-lived relationship- barely three months. She hadn't been in love with him and he probably hadn't either. Still, she always looked back on it with a certain fondness. He had always respected her and she had always appreciated that.

"I've got to go. We're okay?" Sakura said as she headed for the door.

"We were always okay, Sakura. Good luck," Kiba easily told her, pulling her into a light one-armed hug. Sakura poked him once in the uninjured cheek as she pulled out of his grasp and headed to the western watchtower.

Most of her team was already assembled at the western entrance. Some of them already had their masks in place while others held them loosely in their hands as they chatted. At her approach, Konohamaru broke off from the rest of the group.

"Taichou, we're waiting on two people," he informed her. Sakura nodded as she lifted her mask and fixed it in place. The smooth white surface gave way to bright red swirls that painted out the face of a dove. Taking a deep breath through her nostrils, listening to the rustle of leaves in trees as a gentle breeze blew past.

* * *

><p>A week after Uchiha Sasuke arrived, the low rumbles of dissension that had been playing in the background suddenly rose to in a sharp crescendo. It was in the mess hall during dinner after a particularly nasty skirmish. One of the soldiers had lost his left hand and had been sent home along with the unmoving body of one of his comrades. The loss had affected Shikamaru's team greatly. As Sakura stepped into the building, she grabbed a plastic tray and got in line. Naruto, who was sitting at a table already with Konohamaru, waved at her when he saw her. She piled lukewarm udon into her bowl before she set her tray down next to Naruto and slid onto the bench next to him.<p>

"It's not as good as ramen but…" Naruto sulked before he slurped up a mouthful of noodles, splattering broth in every direction in the process.

"Naruto!" Sakura complained as she knocked her shoulder into his.

"Not sorry!" Naruto cheerfully replied through a mouthful of more food. Rolling her eyes, Sakura snapped her chopsticks apart just as the door opened and Sasuke walked in. Their gazes briefly met and she offered him a smile. Sasuke didn't smile back (she privately wondered if he even remembered how to) but he did nod at her. When he went to take a tray, three burlier men that she recognized from Shikamaru's team shouldered past him. One of them stepped on Sasuke's foot and Sakura automatically grabbed Naruto's shoulder, shaking him to get his attention. Sakura watched Sasuke grind his teeth together but say nothing. For a moment, she saw the glimmer of pride she had once seen in his eyes, but then Sasuke shut his mouth and averted his gaze. The inside of Sakura's chest tightened at the sight.

"They give food out to scum like you, Uchiha? I'm surprised the Hokage didn't have you executed the second you set foot in the village," one of the offenders sneered and his friends guffawed along with him. It had gone completely silent in the mess hall. All other conversations tapered off as eyes flew to watch Sasuke warily.

"Come to think of it, why're we the ones stuck with you out here? It's not like you give a shit about our village," another chimed in.

"They're hoping he dies out here. Just like his filthy trash brother."

At the word "trash", Sakura felt the buzz deep in her chest an instant before the crackle of electricity sang through the air. She lunged at the same time that Naruto did. Naruto grabbed Sasuke's shoulder at the same time that Sakura grabbed a handful of one of the men's shirts and yanked hard.

"You're Aokawa, Inoue and Kunizawa. From Shikamaru-taichou's squad," Sakura said, recognizing the faces of each man. The one she was holding on to sneered at her.

"What're you doing, Haruno-taichou? Defending that piece of shit traitor? What for?" he demanded. His two friends nodded in agreement. Sasuke let out an incoherent snarl of frustration as he jerked free of Naruto's grasp and turned to storm out of the building. Sakura glanced back to meet Naruto's eyes. She mouthed the word "go" as she jerked her head in the direction Sasuke had gone. Naruto hesitated, probably worrying that she would cause substantial property damage if left alone.

"Go," she said out loud this time. Shaking his head, Naruto ran off to catch up with Sasuke. Letting out a deep breath, Sakura tightened her grip on the man's shirt before she looked back at him.

"As for you three, let me make this clear. You are to mind your manners and treat every single person here as an equal shinobi of Konoha. Understand?" Sakura instructed with a hard edge to her voice.

"That bastard is no shinobi of Konoha. He's a worthless traitor and a threat to our village. It would be best if someone slit his throat," one of the other men argued. Pursing her lips, Sakura released her hold on the clear leader of the group. She sucked in a breath through her teeth and then fixed on a pleasant smile.

"Bite down or I might dislocate your jaw," she warned him.

"Wha-"

Her first connected with the left side of his face, sending him flying straight into his friends. Sakura watched with some satisfaction as she watched him spit blood out along with one of his molars.

"Ta….Taichou," Konohamaru weakly said as Sakura calmly walked back to her table and took Naruto's abandoned bowl along with hers. Without even touching her food, she calmly emptied the bowls into the garbage and tossed them into the pile waiting to be washed.

The air that washed over her when she left the mess hall was tinged with cold. The long-sleeved blue shirt and black pants she had on weren't even enough to block out the chilly note in the wind. Closing her eyes, she felt carefully and she noticed Shikamaru slowly travelling towards them, probably alerted by the angry flare of Sasuke's chakra. Sakura took a moment to look back through the small window in the door and she found the one-tooth-deficient shinobi picking himself off the floor, still spitting blood. The situation itself was rather self-explanatory but she figured Konohamaru would be willing to supply the details.

Dusting her hands off rather proudly, Sakura made her way back to the quiet calm of the clinic. Takumi was gone, probably catching up on some desperately needed sleep. She took a moment to check on the two men sleeping soundly under the influence of morphine before she struck a match to light the lantern sitting on her desk. A gentle orange glow illuminated the neat stacks of folders and medical texts. The wooden chair creaked as she lowered herself into it. After a quick search, she plucked out the files of her two patients and began filling in new reports in black ink. It was just the soft scratch of her pen and the occasional rustle of paper to accompany her.

Around an hour later, there was a quiet tapping on the window. Sakura glanced up from her work to acknowledge Naruto peering at her through the glass.

"Did you dislocate his jaw?" he casually asked as he strolled in and flopped happily into the only unoccupied bed. Sakura watched Naruto quickly clap a hand over his mouth as he realized that her two patients were still sleeping in the other two beds. But Sakura wasn't worried as she rose from her squeaky chair and walked over to check on their IV bags and record their vitals on their charts.

"They're on morphine, Naruto. They're not waking up until tomorrow night," Sakura sighed. Naruto seemed to relax a little as he sat up, crossing his legs.

"Was Sasuke-kun really upset?"

Sakura almost regretted her question when Naruto's usual grin faded. He scratched the back of his head as he looked around the clinic.

"Uh…. I mean, it's sort of hard to tell nowadays with him, but I think Sasuke was more pissed that those morons brought up his brother…" Naruto finally said as he scratched at the faint stubble on his chin. Sakura didn't say anything as she sat at the end of the bed and patted Naruto's right leg. They listened to the crickets chirruping lazily in the grass outside. A few birds chattered too, though most had their heads tucked safely under their wings as they slept. When Sakura drew in a deep breath, she felt Naruto's eyes on her.

"I don't know how to talk to him anymore. I mean, I never really did, but now I'm really not sure at all. That was your thing. You guys were always like brothers," Sakura admitted, clasping her hands together in her lap. As she spoke, she let her eyes drift over to the clear plastic bags filled with colorless liquid. The light from the two lanterns in the cabin flickered. The orange hue that filtered through the bags danced, warping and shifting in a sluggish waltz.

"That's not true, Sakura-chan," Naruto chuckled, drawing her attention again. Sakura didn't look at him. She knew his face would look haggard and sharp in the dim light. She didn't want to see him like that. That wasn't Naruto's face.

"I tracked him all the way up to Snow Country. He was holed up in some shitty shack in the middle of nowhere. He didn't even try to run away when I knocked on the door. He just answered it like some kind of idiot," he began. It was the story she had been waiting for. She knew Naruto had been strictly ordered not to tell anyone where he was going. Otherwise, he would have told her and Sai everything before leaving. She had waited the entire week, hoping that maybe as they were drinking beer together that Naruto would launch into this story.

"And he was wearing Itachi's ripped, bloody cloak. He wouldn't take off that stupid thing until we got back to Konoha and then he set it on fire by the memorial," Naruto recalled, shaking his head as if he still couldn't believe it.

"Why **did** he even come back? I thought he wanted revenge, not forgiveness," Sakura interrupted. Her voice came out a little sharper than she would have liked. It wasn't right for her to be mad. It wasn't her family that had been slaughtered. It wasn't Naruto that had hurt her. But she kept remembering Sasuke's blank expression, the vague look of disinterest he always seemed to have, as if it didn't matter whether he lived or died. And she couldn't be mad at Sasuke. Not at the man he had become anyway.

"I… I didn't get the full story. But… apparently Itachi was brought back by that sick bastard Kabuto's technique… and Sasuke had the chance to talk to his brother. Sasuke won't tell me what they talked about, but I think that's what changed his mind. It's scary, Sakura-chan. He doesn't know what his purpose is anymore," Naruto sighed in a hushed voice. In the darkness, he reached out to take her hand and it was surprisingly clammy.

"I don't think anyone does except you, Hokage-sama," Sakura weakly teased. And though her attempt at levity was pitiful at best, Naruto humored her by cracking a smile.

"Anyway, I stayed with him in that crap place for about a month. I went into the nearby village to buy food and stuff but I mostly just sat there. I think he thought I had come to kill him. For a few days he just sat staring at me and I did most of the talking. But after about a week, he started telling me stuff too. And then, for no real reason, he wakes me up at the crack of dawn and just says, 'Can I come home?'"

Sakura interrupted again by frowning.

"That doesn't sound like him at all," Sakura said not quite under her breath.

"That isn't Sasuke out there, Sakura. Our Sasuke died when his brother died that second time," Naruto said in reply. And such words coming from such a kind face nearly broke her heart in two. Mostly because she couldn't find a reason to disagree with him.

"What took you so long after you got home then?" Sakura demanded, trying to distract herself.

"Ah, meeting with those crusty elders, trying to strike up a deal. You know, they wanted him executed and the old lady and me were flipping tables and yelling and- you get it," Naruto sighed, scratching the back of his head. At the sound of his exasperation, Sakura couldn't help but laugh a little. She was well-acquainted with the elders and how difficult it was to reason with them. Part of her job as Tsunade's apprentice had consisted of sitting in on such meetings and learning the politics.

"So?" Sakura prompted with another stab of impatience.

"Yeah, they decided that they'd send him out to the border since he's likely to die anyway. So if he can serve a two-year rotation and receive positive feedback from his superiors, he would be allowed to come back to Konoha with a two-year seal put on his chakra. And then probation, guard, you know," Naruto listed off. Part of Sakura wanted to complain about such a harsh sentence. But she made the mistake of glancing over at Naruto and seeing the hard expression etched deep into his furrowed eyebrows and the hard set of his mouth.

"… I guess that's the only way the other kages agreed to not killing Sasuke-kun on the spot, right?" Sakura guessed. Naruto's silence was more than enough confirmation.

"But I think you scared the crap out of Sasuke too, Sakura-chan," Naruto suddenly said as his expression brightened. Sakura released his hand while raising an eyebrow.

"You popped that asshole's teeth out, right?"

"Tooth," she corrected as she tried her best not to smile.

"You should've taken out at least three," Naruto grumbled. Sakura rolled her eyes as she mock-punched his arm.

"Enough sad talk. If you want, you can go chat with him. I think he's mostly pissed at himself for losing his temper," Naruto suddenly grunted as he hopped off the bed and stretched his back in a serious of loud cracks and pops. Sakura shook her head.

"Remember? You guys have a bond. It's different between Sasuke-kun and me," she sighed as she stood too. The odd expression on Naruto's face startled her when she turned around.

"You're the one he said goodbye to," Naruto countered.

"Yeah, because I followed him like some weird stalker," she snorted.

"No. I think he could've avoided you, Sakura-chan. He chose to say goodbye to just you," Naruto assured her, reaching out to ruffle her hair. Sakura pretended to scowl as she reached up to push her bangs out of her eyes. But she couldn't hold onto the expression. She ended up smiling because it was impossible to try to do much else with Naruto.

"I think I'll hit the hay. See you tomorrow, Sakura-chan," Naruto said with his usual grin before he slipped out of the clinic. And Sakura leaned against the doorway with her arms crossed over her chest. She let her head fall to the side as she watched Naruto's back retreat into the darkness. Without realizing, Sakura felt for Sasuke in the mass of people. It wasn't too difficult. He was like a pinprick of radiance, even amongst all these trained killers. Her eyes slid shut as she followed his path from the bath house, skirting around tents and behind the mess hall before she could sense him drawing closer to her. When her eyes fluttered open, she could make out his silhouette slinking through the shadows. Just the red glint of his stare gave away his position. When their gazes locked, for the first time in many years, she didn't feel an automatic stab of panic.

So she lifted her hand to wave weakly at him.

And she thought she saw him wave back.

* * *

><p>Thank you to all my readers and reviewers. I'm really swamped right now so I don't have much time to get any writing done but I'm really grateful to all the people that have stuck with me up until now.<p> 


	4. Maiden Flower

"Are you intoxicated yet, Sakura?" Sai asked. Grinning over the rim of her glass, Sakura shrugged.

"Why? Are you drunk yet, Sai?" she queried right back. There was a rosy flush to Sai's pale face that answered for him even before he shrugged too.

"I'm not sure. I've never been drunk before so I wouldn't know what it felt like." Sai peered carefully down at his drink as he spoke. Puffing out a big breath, Sakura leaned back against the sofa.

"Then you're definitely not drunk enough," was her solemn reply. As she reached over to refill her cup, she felt Sai's finger poking her shoulder.

"Sakura?"

"Yeah?"

"Happy birthday, okay?"

Laughing, she snorted out one word: "Okay."

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 4: Maiden Flower

"Sakura. Sakura, wake up."

Sakura groaned as she squinted in the darkness. She knew it was Shikamaru not just from his chakra signature but from the stench of smoke rolling off of him. Even though her tired body protested, Sakura sat up.

"Naruto's back. He sent a runner ahead to alert us."

At this, Sakura dragged her hand across her eyes to clear them. She nodded sleepily before Shikamaru slipped out of her small room in the back of the clinic. Her apprentice was snoring away at her desk, an encyclopedia of poisons open in his lap. She spared a moment to throw a random cloak over his shoulders so he wouldn't catch a cold. Fumbling around in the dark for her shoes, she found them thrown in a sad heap near her desk. Her clothes were sleep-rumpled. She had collapsed in her bed right after returning from 1 the night before. After seeing the pattern of continued poisonings, Sakura had deduced that something had been contaminated. Though they had fanned out to take samples and test everything from all major sources of water to the air itself, nothing had been found. So, though there were still many men left to care for, Sakura had been forced to return to care for her own. Kurenai had sent a wire a day before to report that several soldiers had gone missing a few days earlier. Naruto's urgency couldn't be a good thing.

Just as Sakura crammed her feet into her boots and exited the clinic, she sensed Sasuke and Naruto in the distance. It took an extra second to notice the men with them and her heart fell when she counted one less than they had left with. She quietly skirted past the tents of sleeping shinobi. Her internal clock was muddled from exhaustion but she guessed that it was sometime around 3 am. When she made her way to the central tent, she found Shikamaru sitting, his ear glued firmly to the radio. The runner Shikamaru had mentioned was standing stiffly at the tent's entrance, his hands clenching and unclenching.

"Who's missing?" Sakura demanded. She watched Shikamaru chew angrily on the end of his cigarette before he spat out an answer.

"Kiba. Kiba's gone."

"Shit," she swore, collapsing into an empty chair. Her fingers twisted into her hair as she stared off at the distance, tracking Naruto and Sasuke through the winding paths in the forest. She barely restrained herself from running blindly into the woods to meet them. Her gut burned and clenched as it always did when she knew that she was relatively safe while Naruto was not. Sasuke added to the mix really did not help lower her stress levels. Gnawing on her chapped lower lip, she stared vacantly out at nothing until she heard the crunch of feet on fallen leaves.

"We were ambushed," Naruto hissed as he pushed past the tent flap and threw himself into the chair next to Sakura's. Their eyes met for an instant before her gaze turned restless, searching for blood, for cuts and bruises. It was only when Naruto reached over to pat her hand with his scarred fingers that she stopped chewing on her lower lip and turned to look at Shikamaru.

"What do we do?" she asked no one in particular.

There was cold, dreadful silence. Before anyone even opened their mouths, she felt sick to her stomach. The call had to be made.

"We can't risk going out right now. Our only choice is to wait until we can get a better grasp of the situation. And in the meantime, you're going to need to heal those guys, Sakura," Shikamaru finally said, his thumb rubbing along the gritty stubble covering his chin.

"We got three down, Sakura-chan. One of them might have lost an eye," Naruto added, looking grim. Sakura swallowed down the hard knot of anger in her throat as she nodded. She ruffled Naruto's dirt-crusted hair as she walked past him and ducked out of the tent. To her surprise, it wasn't the runner hovering just outside the tent. It was Sasuke, his posture oddly stiff. In the past two months, she hadn't seen much of him. Either he was out on intelligence-gathering missions or she was off giving an extra pair of hands to one of the other camps. In fact, it was the first time she had seen him in over two weeks. Her eyes scanned over his face, over his exposed arms and throat. Sasuke was ragged but he looked mostly unhurt.

But then she realized that he was squinting at her.

"Oh no," she sighed, taking him by the hand. As she dragged Sasuke along behind her, she caught sight of the rest of Naruto's team huddled by the east entrance. She barked orders at them to bring the injured to the clinic before she hurried Sasuke into the darkened cabin. Takumi, who had been slumped over her desk, bolted upright at the noise. He hurriedly stood, trying to make it seem like he had been productive.

"Naruto's team just got back. I'm going to need your help," she softly said. Takumi nodded blearily. He barely managed to rub the sleep out of his eyes as the clinic door swung open again. He ran over to prop the wooden door open as someone hobbled inside, his arm thrown over the shoulder of his companion. Sakura took one look at the sticky river running down the side of his face and then back at Sasuke.

"Here," Sakura sighed as she took Sasuke's hand again and led him to the door in the back of the clinic. She shoved him down onto her clean sleeping bag despite his muttered protests. After soaking a cloth in cool water, she wrung it out and placed it over Sasuke's eyes.

"Get some rest. I'm going to have to take a look at those eyes in a bit," she said before she shut the door and hurried over to help the others. Sakura quickly shooed Takumi off to handle the small broken fingers and scrapes of the ones healthy enough to stand. The three that Naruto had mentioned were lying in the narrow hospital beds. Compound cranial fractures and internal bleeding seemed relatively harmless when she came to her third patient.

"Is that…. Is that what I think it is?" Takumi whispered, peering over her shoulder. He had tended to the smaller injuries and sent those men off to bed. Sakura didn't answer him. She grimaced as she peeled back the rough bandages thrown over his face to find a bleeding mass of raw nerves and flesh.

"I think I'll be able to replicate tissue but I'm not sure if it'll be functional…" Sakura mused as she ripped off the useless bandages and tossed them into the tray Takumi held.

"What happened to you guys out there?" Sakura asked when she saw that her patient's other eye was open. He blinked rapidly, eyeball swiveling around wildly until it landed on her face in the darkened cabin. His adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed thickly.

"I don't know. Fuckers came out of nowhere. Can you fix it?" It took her an extra moment to realize that the last sentence was referring to his eye.

"I'll try," was all she could honestly say before she placed her hand over it and began pouring out her chakra. Once the actual shape of the eyeball had been somewhat restored, she had Takumi dress area with alcohol and clean bandages. The man had stayed conscious throughout the procedure despite his blood loss. When Sakura leaned over him to make sure her apprentice hadn't missed anything, he reached up to pat the inside of her wrist with trembling fingers.

"I think with a few more sessions I'll be able to rebuild the actual eyeball. If you're willing, I can try to reattach the nerves after that. It'll hurt like hell though," Sakura warned, not looking at him.

"Thanks, Haruno-taichou. You're pretty awesome," he sighed, lowering his hand. Sakura smiled as she glanced at him.

"You want that morphine now?" she asked. He nodded and Takumi immediately sprang on him, disinfecting and inserting the needle for the IV. Sakura took a moment to check the vitals of the other two before she was satisfied that everyone would be stable for the night. Takumi, still jittery with excitement from being able to help, stood next to her, his light brown eyes eagerly following each of her smallest movements. Sakura let out a loud yawn as she nudged the curtains aside to see that the sky was already shifting from deep purple to bright bursts of scarlet and gold.

"I'm going to go check on Sasuke and then crash for the day. Do you think you could update their files for me?" Sakura asked, pointing to the stack of folders on her desk. Takumi nodded so hard that he reminded her of a bobble head doll. Laughing a little, Sakura patted his shoulder.

"Good job," she sighed before she opened up the door to her tiny room. Sakura was surprised to find Sasuke sleeping rather peacefully. Something about the way his mouth hung open just a little bit made her want to drag Naruto in there so they could laugh together. She tiptoed around him as she slipped out of her boots and slipped out of her skirt. There was a moment of hesitation when she got to her shirt. Her gaze darted over to Sasuke who, from his chakra, was truly asleep. Sighing deeply, she decided to keep her blood-crusted shirt on along with her leggings. Just in case.

She really wanted to check on Sasuke's eyes. A few years back she he stumbled upon Kakashi staying in the hospital after a particularly grueling mission. Though the details were classified, one look at his inflamed, blood-shot eye made it clear just how dangerous it had been. She had tried her best to reduce the swelling and to reverse some of the deterioration, but she had a strange feeling that he could undo her work so easily. According to Kakashi, it felt like someone hammering nails into his eyeball. So Sakura wanted to at least get a look at Sasuke, to see if she could help even just a little. But he was slumbering on so peacefully that she decided it was best to let him rest.

So Sakura curled up in a ball in an effort not to wake Sasuke. She dropped almost immediately into a chakra-depleted sleep. But her rest was interrupted just a couple hours later by the tap of Takumi's shoes on the floor. She was used to it already. This wasn't the first time she had caught up on much-needed rest while leaving her apprentice to watch over things. It wasn't that she distrusted the boy, but the sound of his feet drawing near always pulled her from her dreams. There was a quiet knock and she opened her eyes just in time to see Sasuke's dark eyes snap open. Their gazes locked as Takumi whispered an apology and opened the door.

"I'm so sorry, sensei. But we received a wire for you and they say it's urgent," Takumi informed her in a hushed voice. Sakura frowned as she pulled herself into a sitting position. She nodded to assure him that she had received his message. Bowing nervously (probably because of Sasuke's murderous glare), Takumi closed the door again.

Sakura groaned as she rubbed at the back of her neck. She had still been huddled up on her corner of the sleeping bag and now her body protested the abuse. Sakura glanced over at Sasuke and found him trying to cover his eyes with his hand against the bright sunlight streaming in through the small window. Sakura hoisted herself to her feet and grabbed a towel that she pinned up with a couple of stray senbon to block most of the light. Then she settled on the sleeping bag right next to Sasuke and pried his fingers off his face.

"Like someone's hammering nails into your face, right?" Sakura guessed when she watched Sasuke wince. She couldn't see his expression after that because she covered his eyes with her hands. Channeling chakra to her fingertips, she delved into the delicate network of nerves and capillaries tangling up inside his eyeballs.

"Yeah. How'd you know?" he grunted in a voice still scratchy with sleep.

"Kakashi," was all she said in response. There was a pause and then she noted the way Sasuke's mouth twitched.

"Ah," he responded.

They were both quiet as Sakura concentrated on helping her chakra flow through constricted blood vessels. She relieved the pressure, working on re-opening the pathways that had constricted. There wasn't much she could do other than reduce inflammation in nerves that had begun to strain from overusing the sharingan. Sasuke let out a huge sigh when she flooded his eye sockets with soothing chakra to settle the worst of the swelling. When she pulled her hands away several minutes later, his eyes were closed. His dark lashes fluttered against his cheek as he cautiously cracked his eyes open. Though he had to blink a few times to clear his vision, the relief on Sasuke's face was clear. Sakura smiled triumphantly when Sasuke's eyes fell on her.

"You're welcome," she said as she got to her feet. Still in her wrinkled and bloodied clothes from before, Sakura paused to slip on her shoes.

"Stay in here and sleep. I'll be back in a bit to finish up the healing," Sakura instructed before she slipped out of the room. One of the beds in the clinic was already vacated. The shinobi with the cranial fracture had probably woken up and gone off feeling dandy from all the painkillers running through his blood. Sakura shrugged. He would be back in a few hours when he realized just how much pain he was in.

When Sakura ducked into the central tent, she was shocked to find Hyuuga Neji sitting inside, talking in hushed tones with Naruto. Shikamaru was nowhere to be seen.

"Oh crap," she sighed as she chose to remain standing.

"Someone from 1's gone missing too. Neji was on a routine patrol of the borders with some of his team when they were attacked," Naruto told her. As he spoke, his bright blue eyes narrowed in on her disheveled state. No matter how tired she was, it was rare for her to keep bloody clothes on, always complaining about the risk of infection and contamination. He stood, ignoring her half-hearted protests as he shoved her into the chair he had been occupying.

"Was it Sound?" she asked, not meeting Neji's eyes.

"We're not certain but it seemed like it might have been some of the Root operatives that escaped with Danzo a few years back. We have reason to believe that Danzo's joined forces with what remains of Sound Village," Neji replied in a crisp voice. Sakura resisted the urge to punch his haughty face in. And it didn't necessarily have anything to do with their messy entanglement that had lasted for about six months. She just didn't like him very much as a person. This, added with the fact that he had seen her naked, was what led her to bite her tongue so she wouldn't do anything she might regret later. Pushing her fantasies of breaking his teeth to the back of her head, Sakura looked over at Shikamaru who had just joined them.

"A couple of Hyuuga-taichou's men were injured and we happened to be closer than 1. You think you could spare some chakra?" Shikamaru asked, eyeing her bloodied clothes. Sakura flexed her fingers thoughtfully. She had definitely used up a fair chunk of chakra earlier that morning but she knew she couldn't send injured men along just because their captain was a phenomenal pain in the ass.

"Haruno-sensei!"

The sound of Takumi's panicked voice was something everyone had begun to recognize. Only Neji was the one who tensed up, hand automatically flying to the sword strapped to his back. Sighing heavily, Sakura tilted her head back just in time to catch Naruto rolling his eyes.

"Your puppy's calling, Sakura," Naruto snorted, wincing when she punched him in the arm.

"Yes, Takumi?" she called back, an invitation for him to poke his head in under the tent flap.

"Um… well….Some random bleeding men showed up and… Uchiha-san is… missing…" Takumi nervously informed her. Before Takumi had even finished talking, Naruto and Sakura were rolling their eyes at each other. She let her head slump forward to hit the table while Naruto chuckled and kneaded her tense shoulders.

"Anyway, we need to make some adjustments to our patrol paths. I'll fill you in later. Now go fix some shit," Naruto snorted, giving her one last reassuring thump between the shoulder blades. Sighing and sighing again, Sakura reluctantly got to her feet. She raised a hand to Shikamaru as an apology before she ducked out of the tent, briskly walking across the damp grass while Takumi ran to keep up with her.

"Take care of the severe wounds first. I'll be along in a minute. I need to deal with Mr. Sourpuss," Sakura said and Takumi scurried off. She didn't even need to look for his chakra. Sasuke was up in the same tree as always because he was Sasuke and preferred to avoid human contact if possible. She stood at the base of the trunk, hands on her hips as she peered up at his foot through the gold and orange leaves.

"Are you stupid by any chance?" she asked. He didn't respond.

"I'm guessing you are. I told you to rest. Exposure to sunlight is terrible for you right now," Sakura explained.

"I'm in the shade," Sasuke retorted.

Sakura was tired. She was exhausted, actually. Her temples were throbbing and she desperately needed caffeine. And Sasuke's attitude was just irritating enough for her to land a solid kick to the tree trunk. She shouldn't have laughed when, with an undignified 'thump', Sasuke tumbled off his branch and landed on his ass.

She couldn't tell who was more surprised, her or Sasuke. She looked down at him, pursing her lips to stifle laughter while he stared up at her with wide eyes.

"Did I just knock you out of a tree?" Sakura finally said.

"No," he snapped back a little too quickly. Sasuke's gaze flickered around to make sure that no one else had seen the rather humiliating exchange. Sakura ignored the acid bite of his glare when she grabbed his wrist and dragged him around tents back to the clinic where she could already hear Takumi's frantic footsteps and mutterings as he scrambled around trying to handle everything at once.

"Sensei-"

"In a minute. I just need to take care of this grump over here," Sakura interrupted her apprentice when they stepped into the clinic. She watched Sasuke's lip curl at the ridiculous nickname but she figured he was still too embarrassed to muster up much of a retort. With an exasperated sigh, Sakura pointed to the door leading to her tiny room.

"Take a nap or something. I'll get to you once I take care of these two….handsome gentlemen," Sakura ordered as she finally looked over the two new patients. One of them had two perfect black eyes along with a gash along his chin. The other was missing a couple teeth and looked vaguely as though he'd been thrown through glass. When Sasuke's eyebrows knitted together, Sakura jabbed her finger toward the door again. She waited for him to slink away before she turned her attention to Takumi who looked ready to explode from anxiety.

"Alright. Let's get to work. What do we start with?" she patiently began.

* * *

><p>The excitement died down rather quickly after that. Inuzuka Kiba was an easy-going man with a good sense of humor and an incredibly high tolerance for bullshit. He had been well-liked and his absence was easily noticeable in the solemnity of the soldiers.<p>

Hyuuga Neji and his ragged team left a little after noon the next day, intent on returning to their own base to report the latest developments. Almost reluctantly, she had shoved a vial of her latest version of antidote into his hand. It would delay the onset of the poison but not stop it completely. The chemical make-up had evolved almost too quickly for that. It felt hollow to give someone something so incomplete, something so incapable of really helping. Even if it was Neji, she wouldn't wish some of the gruesome suffering she had witnessed on him.

Shikamaru seemed aware of the odd dynamic between the two captains but did nothing more than raise one eyebrow at her. Naruto, of course, preoccupied by the heavy blow to his team, noticed nothing amiss.

Surprisingly, it was Sasuke that hovered at Sakura's side. Under the pretense that her threats and nagging actually held any kind of power over him, he showed up surprisingly obediently in the clinic twice every day for a week. She knew that the eyes watching her weren't his. Even if she hadn't heard the rumors, Sakura would have known. They were the wrong color: deep brown instead of dark grey. She couldn't bear to ask him the truth about what had happened to him these past years. There weren't any free beds left for him so Sakura held their healing sessions in her little room. The dusty old scrolls she had once stumbled upon in the Hokage's personal archive had mentioned that once a transplant took place, sight deterioration would no longer be a problem. They hadn't mentioned anything about pain though.

"Something's wrong," Sasuke suddenly said. Sakura started, her head whipping around to face the door. But Sasuke was looking up at her with a solemn expression.

"You're sad. And it's not about Inuzuka," he observed in such a detached way that she was almost reminded of Sai a few years back. It hurt to have Sasuke staring at her like that. As a child, she would have given up her right arm just for Sasuke to have looked her way at all. Letting out a short, humorless laugh, Sakura slid her hands over his eyes so she wouldn't have to feel him drilling his gaze straight down into the pit of her soul. There was something so childlike about Sasuke lately that it always made her feel like she had done something wrong.

"Yeah. I'm sad that your eyes are a mess. Did something happen to them that shouldn't have?" she inquired with a little laugh to lighten the mood. When she pulled her hands away, Sasuke was still staring up at her. His stare lingered on her for a moment and then he reached up with his pointer finger to drag the corner of her mouth down in a frown.

"Don't do that. People who can't deal with their pain piss me off," he flatly said. Something tiny and almost-forgotten tugged at the corner of her chest. Smirking Sasuke's disdain, him calling her weak, him commanding her to murder some girl she didn't know. She thought for a minute, and then she reached out to pinch Sasuke's left cheek with a scowl.

"Well people that tell me I'm not dealing with my pain piss me off. I'm handling it and you can shut up," she retorted. Sakura secretly wished she was still innocent and foolish enough for Sasuke's appraising look to have been enough to make her smile again. They stopped talking for a while during which Sakura returned to healing the extensive scarring around the optic nerve that she hadn't really been able to notice before with all the inflammation.

"Who performed this transplant? A child with a hacksaw could have done a better job!" Sakura huffed.

"Uchiha Obito," he quietly said.

Sakura's hands froze. She hadn't expected him to tell her anything at all. Her fingers curled into her palms, like they were resisting the very idea of touching him again. Sasuke was quiet and it almost looked like he was waiting for some kind of reaction.

"That must've hurt. He's not a registered medic," Sakura finally responded in a soft voice. She ran her thumb along the tiny scar in the outer corner of his eye. It was as clumsy mark, made with unskilled hands. She could have done it without a trace. Then Sasuke wouldn't have been in so much pain in the first place.

"Well…at least I know why there's so much discomfort," she suddenly said. She saw his mouth twitch into a frown again.

"There was a lot of damage to the optic nerve and surrounding tissue when he removed your original eyes. And then your nerves weren't encouraged to reconnect properly. Basically, your eyes aren't fully attached," Sakura explained patiently. She didn't realize that her hand was still resting on his cheek until his eyes focused on it. Feigning ignorance, she slowly moved to put her palm over his right eye, pressing to his closed lid.

"So my eyes are going to fall out of my head," Sasuke flatly surmised. Sakura's chakra sputtered to a stop.

"Did you just make a joke?" she demanded. He raised his eyebrows.

"That's what you made it sound like," Sasuke responded with a shrug.

"No. They're not going to fall out. It's just that a few nerves and muscles are doing a lot of work. I can try to encourage regeneration and growth if you'd like. It would probably reduce those headaches you get," Sakura offered. Sasuke sat up. Leaning back on his hands, he gave her a level stare.

"How long would that take?"

She took a moment to do a few mental calculations.

"Maybe three or four half-hour sessions?" she finally said, counting one more time to make sure.

"Do it," Sasuke immediately told her. Sakura smirked.

"Only if you say please, Sasuke-kun."

* * *

><p>A week after the abductions, Sakura found herself lolling back in a creaky folding chair next to Tenten. Though the poisonings had disappeared (a happy coincidence that she just couldn't trust), there was no end to the shinobi that managed to get themselves blown up or stabbed. Normally, Ino could handle these occurrences on her own. But there had been an urgent matter involving cranial hemorrhaging. And when it came to the brain, there was no one more adept at saving the smallest capillaries and nerves as Sakura was. The only exception, perhaps, was Tsunade.<p>

"How'd it go?" Tenten asked.

Sakura wanted to rub her face with her hands but they were still covered in blood.

"I'm not sure. He might have some memory loss. We won't know until he wakes up," Sakura sighed, opting for rubbing her cheek against her shoulder. After a moment, Sakura glanced over and noticed Tenten's glum expression.

"How're things going with you and our Green Beast?" Sakura queried. To her surprise, Tenten puffed her cheeks out in a childish pout.

"I haven't seen him in months. And you know, the last time I got temporary leave to go home for a week, he was sent out on a mission," Tenten complained, obviously relieved to have someone to vent to. Shaking her head, Sakura rubbed at a spot of red on her knee.

"When the hell are you two going to have time to get married?" Sakura wondered. Tenten grimaced.

"My thoughts exactly. You know, it might have worked out better if Lee had been set up here instead of Isami or Neji," Tenten added, still sulking. Sakura tried not to let her smile falter. Tenten still had no idea how much her words would have hurt Neji had he been listening. Fortunately, he was all the way on the other side of camp, sparring with some of the others to pass the time.

"You know, everyone always thought you were going to end up with him, not Lee," Sakura mused.

"What? No way! We'd always be arguing," Tenten snorted. Sakura considered this for a moment.

"Yeah. Throwing crap around, breaking tables…" she conceded after some thought.

"Speaking of which. You getting any action lately, Sakura?" Tenten asked with a leer. Sakura responded by hooking her foot around the leg of Tenten's chair and yanking it out from under her. Falling back with a grunt, Tenten began laughing. As Tenten righted the chair, Sakura raised an eyebrow at her.

"Okay. A dry spell. I get it," Tenten said, raising her hands in a passive gesture.

"Whatever you want to think. I'm checking on the patient one more time before I take my boys and leave. You guys need any more supplies?" Sakura abruptly announced, getting to her feet.

"I wouldn't know anything about that. Go ask Yamanaka," Tenten called after her as Sakura pushed past the tent flap. 1 was set up much like 2 with the captains' tent in the middle and various tents set up around. The only difference was that the mess hall and clinic were also big tents and bathing was restricted to the nearby lake. It was easy to find Ino's chakra signature, angry and pulsating, inside the clinic. Sakura nudged the flap to the side and found Ino squawking into someone's ear as she set his arm with a rough twist.

"And this is why Shizune almost failed you for bedside manner, Ino," Sakura remarked as she stepped inside. Ino glowered at her before she turned to find a splint.

"Sparring against Hyuuga-taichou?" Sakura asked, eyeing the red marks dotting his forearms. Gritting his teeth, the young man nodded. Sakura grasped his wrist with his right hand to carefully lift his arm. Chakra flowed out of her palm in a soothing wave that carefully melted the break in the bone together. Cooling the inflamed area, she used her fingers to lightly brush up and down to check her work.

"Better?"

Letting out a sigh, he slumped forward, letting his forehead hit her collarbone.

"Can you stay here forever, Taichou?" he requested.

"What, am I not good enough?" Ino immediately demanded.

"Unfortunately, you'll have to bear with Ino's nagging for a while. I'd be careful with that for the next day or two just in case," Sakura laughed. The young man flashed a smile as he nodded and hopped off the hospital bed. As he hurried out, Ino put her hands on her hips.

"What do you mean she almost failed me?"

Sakura feigned innocence while moving around to check the stocks of medicine. After a pause, she turned to face her friend.

"Ino, you can't terrorize people who are already in pain. I mean, you're great at your job. It's just the people part I wish you'd work on. We only save tormenting for the particularly stubborn patients…like Shikamaru," Sakura amended. Ino tried not to smile but her lips quirked up anyway.

"That's stupid. Are you heading back soon?" Ino scoffed, walking over to bump her hip against Sakura's.

"Need anything? You holding up here okay?" she asked, pausing to rifle through some of the vials of medicine.

"Sakura?"

"Hmm?" Sakura replied without looking up. She picked up a glass flask and shook it to examine the contents carefully.

"I'm going to quit once I go home."

Sakura dipped her head in a nod before she went back to flipping through labels and matching up the vials of medication to them.

"You're not going to stop me?" Ino sounded hurt and almost a little bit angry.

"I've seen plenty of people try and then decide this isn't it. It's taxing, emotionally and physically. You should do what you want, Ino. We don't live long enough to be wasting time," Sakura responded with a heavy sigh. Leaning her hip against the edge of the cabinet, Sakura gave her friend a tired smile.

"Let me guess. You're joining your dad in the Interrogation Force?"

Ino pursed her lips.

"Yeah, but now I'm reconsidering. I'd expect you to be more heartbroken over my betrayal, Forehead," the blonde teased. Drilling her finger into Sakura's side, she elicited a laugh from her ticklish companion.

"I'm crushed, Piggy. Devastated. I'll never recover," Sakura gushed. After some playful swatting and pinching, Sakura threw her arm over Ino's shoulder.

"I hate you, you asshole," Ino giggled, sounding like a kid again. To emphasize her point, she knocked her forehead against Sakura's.

"I know," sighed Sakura in response with a laugh of her own.

That night, with just three men from her squad, Sakura made the long journey back to 2 in the darkness. It was easier that way with the shadows to cover their movements in the thick foliage. Since this was still Fire Country, they were familiar with what plants rustled, what branches muffled footfalls. The foliage was their friend. They stopped about 6 hours in to take a quick break for water.

"Um… Taichou. Quick question?" one of them whispered. Sakura squinted and she saw him hanging upside off a branch by the soles of his feet.

"Shoot," she responded, her palm resting against the tree trunk to sense for any strange vibrations.

"You were teammates with Uchiha, right?" he ventured. There was a muffled yelp as Sakura could guess that one of his comrades threw a rock at the back of his head. Suppressing a smile, Sakura made a noise of assent.

"Well… are all the rumors about him true? I mean you usually don't put up with anyone's crap. So I'm wondering how you forgave him so easily after he betrayed you."

There was a deafening silence. Only the shrill calls of cicadas filled their ears as Sakura searched for the right words. She could feel their eyes on her. She had always been the strong leader to them. Impervious to the advances of grabby men and never weak even in times of chaos. Biting her lower lip, she tilted her head back to stare up at the black tangle of leaves swaying above her.

"It's much harder… to hate someone who's been broken. He's been stripped down to this raw, empty core and it's like… it's almost like he's drifting through days instead of living them. How can you be angry at someone like that? How… can you hate someone when all they have left is you?" she finally said in a quiet voice. There was another thud as another rock was thrown at the back of the young man's head.

"Ouch! Quit that, Konohamaru!" he hissed, finally releasing his hold on the branch and flipping onto his feet. Sakura let them shove each other for a minute before she rapped her fist against the tree.

"It's fine. Really. Sasuke's not a forbidden topic or anything. But we should get going. I'd like to get back before dawn," Sakura announced. With those words, they took off into the forest again, this time with a slightly heavier atmosphere following them. Once or twice, she glanced back at her boys with wondering eyes. Did they see her any differently? But it was too dark to see their expressions and if they thought anything of her words, they didn't voice such opinions. By the time they made it back to 2, the sun had already begun to climb up over the treetops.

"Good work, you three. Get some rest today," she sighed, rubbing at the back of her neck as she headed for the central tent. But she stopped when she realized that all three of them had stopped walking.

"What's wrong?" asked Sakura, glancing back at them over her shoulder. With solemn expressions, they stared right back at her.

"It's nothing," Konohamaru finally answered. Sakura didn't have much time to ponder their strangeness as she heard her name being half-screamed.

"SENSEI!" Takumi practically sobbed as he ran across camp toward her. With a sigh already on her lips, she turned toward him. But her joke about him missing her died on her lips when she saw the fresh blood dripping from his fingers.

There had been another ambush. Since it had been a routine scouting, just a few of the men from Shikamaru's team had gone out without their leader. No one had been abducted. But there had been an anticoagulant coating the knife. It had been two of the soldiers affected. One of them had suffered a severe cranial laceration; he died just after being carried back by his comrades. Takumi had sat at the remaining patient's for five hours making sure he didn't bleed out from the gash in his side. When Sakura quickly recognized the agent and whipped up an antidote, Takumi nearly sobbed from relief. Hunched over on a stool, he clasped his hands together and gritted his teeth.

"I almost…" he choked out in a tight voice. Putting her hand on his shoulder, she squeezed gently.

"You did well," she responded in a soothing tone. Sakura didn't mind when Takumi pressed his face against her hands and cried for a little while. Though it felt like a million years ago, it really hadn't been that long since she had first seen the cold blue lips of a lost patient. It wasn't as intense now after years of practice. But there was always a hollow sort of despair, a phantom pain that didn't quite hurt her chest.

"I'm very proud of you, Takumi."

She sent Takumi off to sleep once he had calmed down a little. Hiccupping and sniffling, he stumbled back to his tent, hands shaking so hard that he barely managed to open the door by himself. Arms crossed over her chest, Sakura stood in the doorway to watch him stagger through the darkness toward his tent.

"He doesn't look cut out for this," she heard Sasuke's voice reach out to her. He had been standing outside for a while, probably from when she had first returned to camp. But she was so drained, so busy and maybe it was because she was so used to Sasuke now that she didn't feel surprised to see him anymore. She glanced to the right and there he was leaning against the side of the clinic.

"I couldn't hold a scalpel for a week after the first time I lost a patient. I don't think he's doing too badly," Sakura responded with a shrug. When she turned away to clean up, she heard his light footsteps tap up the stairs and into the clinic. He leaned against the doorway, silent as he watched her. The soothing sounds of antiseptic wipes rubbing over surfaces bridged the gap between them. Sakura turned back for a moment to look at him.

"How've your eyes been?" she asked before turning back to her work.

"Better," Sasuke responded without hesitation. Sakura waited for him to say something else but he fell silent. Stripping the blood-soaked sheets from the bed, she tossed them into the laundry basket to be disinfected and cleaned. To her surprise, when she retrieved a fresh set of bedding from the cabinet, she heard Sasuke's footsteps approach. Not asking, not offering anything, Sasuke wordlessly took the other end of the fitted sheet from her hands and moved to the foot of the bed to help her.

Something about Sasuke performing such a domestic task with such a serious face was almost funny. Smiling a little to herself, Sakura tucked the sheet under the mattress with quick, efficient movements. They easily spread the flat sheet down over it and folded the corners under fresh pillows.

"What's wrong?" Sasuke suddenly asked. Sakura blinked and found that her fingers had curled around the edge of the mattress. She quickly smoothed the fabric back down.

"What do you mean?" she responded briskly. She had to keep her hands busy. She fluffed the pillows, washed her hands. Every time she moved, she could feel Sasuke's eyes on her back. His gaze wasn't angry or accusatory. But it still burned a little, like a physical heat between her shoulder blades.

This Sasuke was different. He wanted to know how she felt sometimes. Sakura always wondered if he was actually worried about her or if he was just trying to remember how to feel. Sometimes she thought it was a little of both. Forearms resting on the edge of the sink, Sakura stared down at the scrubbed metal basin. Takumi kept it spotless.

"I wonder… I wonder when I started to forget the patients I lost…" she finally began. Sasuke sat in her desk chair, his dark gaze fixed on her as he waited. Sakura sucked in a deep breath through her nose.

"You know, I used to remember the names and faces of all the patients I couldn't save. They used to haunt me for a while. But now… now I can't even think of what they looked like," Sakura explained as she lifted her head to look at him. After a long moment of silence, the chair creaked as Sasuke leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees.

"Why does that bother you?" he demanded. His bluntness pierced her. When had Sasuke become like this? Didn't he understand the value of human life anymore? Had he forgotten that after years of killing and wounding just to survive? But when their eyes met, Sakura didn't see the same blankness he had first reappeared in front of her with.

"Because…Because they were people, Sasuke-kun. They had families and friends and lives and- What do you mean? Doesn't that matter to everyone else? Doesn't that mean anything to you?" Sakura breathed out. She watched his eyebrows knit together for an instant.

"But… It's your job to try to save people. You're not a god. You can't do the impossible. But you save more than you lose, right? You can't expect yourself to do more than that," Sasuke finally said. Clenching her hands into fists, Sakura lowered her gaze.

"I want to. I don't want to watch anyone else die," she whispered.

The chair groaned as he stood. His even footsteps travelled toward her. A low sigh escaped his mouth. And then she felt his fingers brushing her left arm. He didn't hold her hand, just held her wrist with a touch so light that it almost wasn't there. Slowly, she looked up to meet his eyes. Sasuke didn't look angry. He just looked frustrated.

"What you do is much better than good enough," Sasuke murmured.

And she looked into those heartbreakingly clear eyes, so light brown that they were almost amber. She looked at him and she finally felt herself smile.

"You think?" she asked, voice cracking. She didn't understand how his one nod almost brought tears to her eyes.

They stood that way for a long time before Sakura gently extricated herself from his grasp. She brushed past him to check on her patient still slumbering away in the corner. As she made sure that his IV bag would last through the night, Sasuke sat in her chair again.

"So?" Sakura prompted without looking up.

"So?" Sasuke repeated. She almost rolled her eyes.

"What brings you here? I'm sure it's not because it's so fun to watch me work," half-joked Sakura in return. She looked up just in time to see Sasuke spin around in her chair once, knee drawn up to his chest.

"I…wanted to ask your opinion on something…" Sasuke admitted a little haltingly. At this, Sakura's stare drifted to Sasuke's face. His eyes were focused on her hands as they hooked the IV bag back on the stand. Curiosity piqued, Sakura walked over to the empty bed closest to him and leaned against the railing to listen. Only when she crossed her arms over her chest and lifted an eyebrow at him did Sasuke speak again.

"Naruto and Shikamaru were talking. And some scouts said they found what looks like an enemy camp. Which means Inuzuka might be there," he began.

"And… I was thinking that I wouldn't go if they decided to investigate it," Sasuke added, eyes not meeting hers.

"What? Why?" Sakura immediately demanded.

Sasuke was silent for a long time. He fixed her with a level stare that she remembered even after so many years spent apart. He was looking at her like she was asking the most obvious and redundant question in the world.

"Sasuke-kun," she sighed.

"I shouldn't be there," Sasuke insisted.

"Sasuke-kun!" Sakura said a little louder this time. Sasuke met her frown unflinching.

"If things go wrong, Sakura, who are they going to blame first?" he inquired through clenched teeth.

"Why are you assuming that things will go wrong?" was what Sakura asked in return.

"Sakura, the chance that Inuzuka's still alive isn't too good. And if we can't recover him, people will start to get suspicious if I just **happened** to be with the team that failed." They fell silent. Sakura's glare softened just a little as she took in his words. Sliding off the bed, she took the few steps that separated them. Standing right in front of him, Sakura sucked in a deep breath.

"But what if you succeed? What will they say about you then?" she wondered out loud. Giving an exasperated sigh, Sasuke glanced at her out of the corners of his eyes.

"Are you just saying that? Or are you really that stupidly optimistic?" Sasuke snorted. Sakura wasn't hurt by that.

"A little of both," responded Sakura with a half-hearted shrug. They were quiet again for a long time. When Sasuke finally turned to really look at her, his gaze was even.

"Are you scared, Sasuke-kun?"

Sasuke blinked a few times, almost wonderingly. He tilted his head back to stare up at the ceiling.

"I don't know," he finally said.

So Sakura bent to press her hands to his shoulders and stare him directly in the eyes. And like she had done to Naruto a million times before they ran out into the middle of a smoking battlefield with chakra screaming from their limbs, she pressed her forehead to Sasuke's. Sasuke was stiff, his eyes unblinking as he watched her.

"Sasuke, don't you dare leave me alone. Don't you dare run away. You'll get through this," she whispered fiercely. Eyes burning, she stared at Sasuke until she saw something shift in his gaze. Just for a moment, he brought his hands up to squeeze her upper arms, to say that he understood. Only then did she let herself smile.

"Good," she sighed, knocking her forehead against his just enough to make him blink. She released him and then straightened.

"Sakura," Sasuke called out just as she began to wonder if she would be able to sneak in a quick nap before patients started streaming in with the usual array of injuries. She turned back on her heel to look at Sasuke.

"Thank you."

After a lot of discussion, they agreed to send Naruto and his team to investigate rumors about the enemy camp while Shikamaru and Sakura held down the fort. A week later, they were off a few hours before dawn. Sakura didn't see them off. She lay in her sleeping bag to stare up at the wooden beams supporting the building after a sleepless night. Once she couldn't feel their chakra signatures anymore, she sat up, curling her knees up to her chest. Even though it would be a few hours before the day really started, she got to her feet and dressed in the dark. On the way to the central tent, she passed Takumi's little tent. A lamp was still on inside and she could see his thin silhouette hunched over his lap, probably reading furiously to figure out what he had done wrong.

The boy had taken his first death hard but he was still trying.

"I was going to ask if you ever actually sleep but I realized that's a stupid question," Shikamaru greeted her as she ducked under the tent flap. She was so tired that she didn't even bother to reprimand him for the lit cigarette resting between his fingers. With a vague nod, she settled in the chair next to his and kicked her feet up on the table.

"You okay, Haruno?" Shikamaru suddenly asked.

The standard response would be to brush off his concerns, to assure him that she was fine. But this was Shikamaru. So she let out a deep breath before crossing her arms over her chest.

"Probably," she finally responded.

Exhaling a ring of smoke, Shikamaru just nodded.

Exactly three days later, they were back and Sakura actually dropped her coffee when she counted the signatures and counted again. Leaving a slightly puzzled Takumi to clean up, she threw the door open and almost tripped in her hurry. Running barefoot across packed earth and lightly-frosted grass, she flung herself straight at the first important face she saw. Sasuke managed to catch her before he fixed her with a level stare. He smelled a little of burning wood and there was a scrape on the corner of his mouth but otherwise he seemed fine. But she didn't even have time to say anything before she met Naruto's clear cerulean eyes that glittered with excitement.

"You big fucking moron!" she exclaimed as she threw her arms around him. Naruto squeezed back just as tightly even though there was a huge gash on his temple and she could feel the thick bandages wound around his middle even through his armor.

They brought Kiba into the clinic on a crudely-constructed stretcher thrown together from tree branches and scraps of rope. Someone had thought to knock him unconscious, probably the most merciful alternative to leaving him aware during the rough trek back. Takumi shuddered when the stench of raw flesh filled the cabin. Only Sakura's expression remained steely as she rolled up her sleeves to get to work.

* * *

><p>The off-white curtain closing off Kiba's bed from the rest of the room fluttered. An old folding chair held the wooden door open, letting the cool breeze sweep into the small cabin. The dark monitor beside his bed flickered with each quiet beep that measured his heart rate. Sakura stretched her arms over her head, leaning back in the hard wooden chair until her joints let out a satisfying pop. She paused for a moment, listening to the almost-silent wheeze of his breaths.<p>

She stood and the chair's quiet creak grated against the easy silence. A huge yawn escaped her mouth as she made her way over to Kiba's bedside and lightly touched his unharmed cheek with the back of her hand. She marked down 'reduced fever' on the chart at the foot of his bed and then took another moment to look up at his sleeping face. Very carefully, she pulled the thin blanket free from the messy knot around his legs and placed it over him. When she straightened, she took another look around the dark room.

The distant flicker of the campfires outside casted a light orange glow across the walls. A teetering pile of medical texts stood in a corner from where she had frantically sat flipping through them just a few hours before. Half of her bloody handprint glistened on one of the leather covers. Even though her dry eyes were begging to slide shut, she grabbed a bottle of alcohol from the nearby cabinet along with a wad of cotton and set to wiping the book clean. The biting smell of the antiseptic was so familiar to her that it was almost soothing. With a few unhurried swipes, the peeling brown leather was clean once again, gleaming in the low light.

As she crossed the room to place the book back on the shelf, a chakra signature caught her attention. It wasn't slow and lethargic like that of a sleeping person's. It was sharp, almost piercing as it quickly approached. She sucked in a sharp breath as the familiar pattern triggered a million different alarms in her brain. The usual knot of anticipation and shame burned in her gut, festering like an old wound. For a moment, she considered slipping out the back door and into the woods beyond but she knew that he wouldn't let her escape so easily. Instead, she leaned against the edge of an empty bed, tracing the cool metal frame with her fingertips. His footsteps were slow and light as they tread through the grass.

"You're awake," Hyuuga Neji sighed as he stopped just outside the door. She could smell the faintest hint of beer on him as he took a few steps inside. A half-frown tugged at her lips. She tilted her head back and the warm air tickled at her exposed throat.

"Why are you here?" Her words came out as more of a sigh than a question. He took another step towards her and she recognized the pattern. He had always been the one to start, but it had always been her decision to take that extra step to reach him or to walk away. This time, she refused to move any closer or farther. She was tired of this game.

"Uzumaki wanted to talk to me about one of the problems with the border," he vaguely replied. Her head reflexively snapped up, her personal issues with the captain suddenly forgotten.

"You mean the one where Kiba almost got skinned?" she demanded, staring directly into his eyes. The colorless irises sucked her in, stealing the breath from inside her lungs. Still, she refused to break his gaze, glaring straight into him until he gave a small nod.

Her throat tightened as she cast a quick glance back at Kiba's slumbering form. Even in the dark, she could see the thick slices of skin missing from his face and neck, revealing the dark red tissue beneath. The IV in his arm pumped him full of painkillers. Even with the soothing salve she had received from the Hyuuga clan, the pain would be excruciating once he woke. It would take at least a few weeks of regular healing sessions to fully regenerate the flesh missing from more than 50% of his body. The physical therapy needed to regain true feeling and function could span over months. And she couldn't even tell how badly his nerves had been damaged in the process. It would be cruel to force him to stay awake to test his reflexes when every inch of his exposed skin burned like fire ants were burrowing into it. Even now, Sakura could barely suppress the same rage that had boiled in her chest when he had been dragged back to camp early that morning.

"I hope we find the bastards that did this," she growled as she turned back to Neji. He gave Kiba a brief look too, his jaw tightening, but didn't comment. Then, she felt his eyes focus in on her, tracing her body in a way that made her skin tingle.

"But that's not why you're still here," Sakura added and Neji's burning gaze finally travelled back up to her face. His white, even teeth gleamed as he sighed through clenched teeth.

"I suppose not," he finally replied as he moved even closer, until she could feel the very fronts of his sandals bump against her bare toes. His long fingers traced up the side of her throat, finally twisting into her short hair. Her fingers tightened around the edge of the bed as she watched his mouth hover dangerously close over hers. For some reason, the shape of his lips, his narrow, almost feminine jaw… they all felt repulsively wrong. Her suddenly shaky fingers unhooked themselves from the bed and pushed against his chest. But his face was still so close to hers, familiar skin grazing her skin.

"Stop," she demanded, shoving him again, harder this time. His lips were on her throat, teeth biting down almost painfully on the tender flesh. When had his fingers become manacles on her wrists? She squirmed in his iron hold but all the strength had been sapped from her body when she had healed Kiba. Her breath came in short jerking gasps that she desperately wanted to claim was from distress and not something else. His mouth travelled lower, pressing to her collarbone. There was another prick of pain as he marked himself there, leaving a red blotch on her skin. Even when she tried to jerk her knee up in a last-ditch effort, he smoothly countered, wedging his leg between hers to keep her still.

"Hyuuga, stop!" she hissed, trying to jerk away from his mouth.

Acid burned in her throat. The back of her neck felt hot. She recognized the feeling easily. It was shame. Shame at being caught up with the man she had sworn to forever walk away from. Shame at not being strong enough in more than one way to push him away.

"You coward."

Neji's mouth suddenly disappeared. The hands encircling her wrists grew painfully tight, squeezing until she could feel the blood draining from her fingertips. His narrowed eyes were staring into hers with an intensity that she had never seen before. But besides his anger, there was something else that seized her attention. It suddenly felt like someone had stabbed her through the chest with a hot knife. There was such burning rage in the air that she was sure that she could reach out and grab a handful of it. The intensity of the chakra seemed to steal her breath away. It was beautiful and terrifying all at once, colored icy blue with rage: it was Sasuke.

"Your traitor coming to the rescue?" he inquired.

"You're hurting me. Let me go," she replied in an equally even tone. But he seemed not to hear her.

"I'm **not** Tenten. Let me go," Sakura said, louder this time. Even if she couldn't fight him, she could feel Sasuke's spiking chakra drawing closer and closer. For an instant, Neji's eyes widened, as if her words had stabbed at some deep, tender part of him. His fingers slid from her arms, dropping to his side like lead.

"You're pathetic, you know. You haven't even spoken to her since Lee proposed to her," she continued as she looked down at the red splotches on her arms. When she looked up, his eyes were ice. She folded her arms over her chest, lifting her chin high. His attempt at intimidation was useless. She had dealt with her share of murderous looks from a certain teammate before.

"At least I had the balls to say what I felt," she spat, matching his fierce expression with a glower of her own. Neji's lip curled.

"Your shallow obsession with the Uchiha? Is that what you're referring to?" he replied with a snort.

"Yeah. It was shallow. **I** was shallow. But at least I told him everything. I told him that I would die for him. I told him that he was everything to me. And even if he didn't return a fraction of my feelings, he listened to me and then…." She suddenly trailed off, remembering Sasuke's sad smile as he glanced over his shoulder at her. And then, his fingers were stabbing her pressure point and darkness seeped into the edges of her mind, consuming everything in its path. Her right hand rose, absently rubbing at the spot, touching it to make sure it was real. She looked back up at Neji with a smirk. She could sense Sasuke hovering just outside the cabin, hiding in the shadows by the door.

"He thanked me. And that was enough for me."

She turned away from him, to look out the window, at the stars spilling across the dark sky above.

"Don't come looking for me again. I'm done with this," she firmly said. She could feel the warmth of his fingers hesitating just an inch away from her. She could feel his gaze linger on her wrists where she knew the bruises were darkening nicely.

And like always, he didn't say anything as he turned his back and walked out the door. As he left, she felt Neji's chakra flare as he passed by Sasuke. She waited for Sasuke to attack him or to burst into the cabin to see if she was alright. But a minute passed, and then two and Sasuke's presence drifted farther from her, wandering out in the campsite. She could feel the irritated throbbing in his chakra, but it had calmed significantly. She considered going after him, but she stopped herself, shaking her head. Sasuke had his own way of approaching things.

Sakura took a deep breath as she looked around the room, desperate for something to keep her occupied. After a moment, she decided that it was suddenly far too quiet- far too cold to do anything so she took a spare blanket from the cabinet and draped it over her shoulders. An instant before she looked, she felt Sasuke's chakra flicker- far away and then close.

Sasuke filled the doorway, his dark eyes focused completely on her.

"Are you alright?" he demanded, fierce stare indicating that he wasn't playing dumb about overhearing her earlier conversation.

"Huh. I don't know," she finally replied, meeting his unreadable gaze. For an instant, it looked as if the corner of his mouth was curling up into a smile. He crossed the room with his usual steady pace, like nothing in the world could force him to speed up. She had always liked that about Sasuke. Even if he didn't know where he was going, the steps he took to get there were always sure. He hesitated a few steps away from her, fingers lingering unsurely in the air. Sakura smiled for real as she sat on an empty bed and patted the spot next to her.

"What's wrong?" she asked as Sasuke sat on the edge of the foam mattress. The side of his face blocked her view of the door. She sucked in a breath. His profile, soaking in the dying glow of the campfires outside, was so beautiful that it almost hurt to look at. He sat, mute for a moment. Slowly, he closed his eyes, dark eyelashes casting deep shadows across his cheeks. The angry pulsing of his chakra had quieted somewhat, but she could still feel the irritation rolling off of him. When he opened his eyes, he turned to look at her.

"How's Inuzuka?" he finally asked. Sakura reflexively looked over at Kiba's bed on the other side of the room. She sighed.

"Better. I'm not worried about him dying anymore. I'm just worried about all the pain he's going to be in when he wakes up," she replied. Sasuke's eyebrows slanted as he followed the direction of her gaze.

"What… did they do to him?" he asked with a hint of hesitation.

"They bound him with handcuffs and chakra restraints. They didn't give him food or water. And when he didn't answer their questions, they started skinning him," Sakura responded as the shadow of anger began burning in her stomach once again. She could feel Sasuke start to try to respond. But she knew him. He wouldn't know what to say so he would stay quiet. And for once, she was grateful for his silence. They sat together, watching Kiba's heart rate monitor and listening to the breeze rattle through the drying leaves still clinging to tree branches.

"Disgusting…" Sasuke finally said. She sighed.

"Yeah," she agreed. Another quiet moment passed between them. Somehow, the awkwardness between them had begun to fade away. It was easier to breathe around him now, maybe because she didn't feel the need to look good around him anymore. A strange thought nagged at the back of her brain.

"You're not here to ask about Kiba either," Sakura suddenly said. When she glanced over, the outline of his full lips was pulled into a grim line. There was a little wrinkle in his forehead as he turned to her. It was too dark to really see his face except for the way his obsidian eyes glittered. They were black holes that seemed to devour all the light, swallowing it whole, until all she could see was him.

"I… wasn't trying to eavesdrop…" Sasuke quietly said. Sakura sucked in a shaky breath. She watched his fists tighten a little as he waited for her to speak.

"…I was lonely… and Tenten had just announced her engagement to Lee a week before. It was just after a long mission… one of my teammates didn't make it," she sighed, staring up at the wooden ceiling as she thought.

_Sakura hurried into the pub, slamming the wooden door shut behind her. Still, the icy wind seemed to cling to her body as she sat down at the far end of the bar. She rubbed her gloved hands together as she waited. The stout, old bartender cast a brief glance in her direction and muttered to himself as he rummaged under the bar. She had come here enough times with Naruto or Kakashi for him to recognize her._

"_Tough day?" he asked in a gruff but kind voice as he waddled over to her and set a shot glass in front of her. When he slid a bottle of dark amber liquid over to her, Sakura arched an eyebrow. She wiped the layer of dust off the label and squinted to read in the dim light._

"_You look like you need it," the bartender said before he went off to tend to his other customers. _

_The night passed in a blur of familiar faces nodding at her as they walked past. Her teammate for the mission, a man a few years older than her, stopped by at some point and shared a quick drink with her before leaving. Unlike her, he was married and had a son. The sting of grief took a back seat to his excitement to see his family. _

_The alcohol was just starting to fill her with fizzy warmth when __**he**__ walked in. Rock Lee dragged him by the arm, his free hand holding Tenten's. Lee laughed enthusiastically as he guided his team to a booth and then took off to buy drinks. Sakura pressed the cool glass against her temple, letting out a big sigh. To her surprise, the bar stool beside her scraped across the floor and she heard his hands hit the bar. Very slowly, she raised her head to meet Hyuuga Neji's grim expression. He didn't need to speak. The misery in his eyes said enough. _

"_Can I get another drink here?" she called to the bartender_

"_Why did you come here if you're going to be so down?" Sakura suddenly inquired, turning back to the quiet genius. She watched as a clean shot glass slid down the bar, straight into Neji's waiting hand. His pale fingers were elegant as he poured and drank. _

"_They are my teammates," he stiffly replied. She snorted and he looked up at her to scowl, obviously insulted. _

"_So?" she retorted. She paused to drain the contents of her glass, making a face as the alcohol burned down her throat. She could feel his gaze on her as he waited for her to explain. _

"_No matter how much I love Sai and Naruto, I would never tag along if I knew I'd be miserable," Sakura said with a little laugh. Poking her finger in his direction, she elaborated: "You're too nice." Her fingertips trailed along the cool rim of her empty glass. If she hadn't been listening carefully, she would have missed his quiet voice among the babble of the pub._

"_I'm not nice at all."_

_The instant she met his eyes, electricity sped through her. The intensity of his expression seeped into her skin, adding to the pleasant warmth of the alcohol humming through her body. His reached out to rest lightly on her left knee. It lingered there, an unspoken question. She sucked in a breath, unable to look away from him. _

"_My place is kind of far from here," she heard herself whisper. _

_For the first time in her life, she saw Hyuuga Neji's mouth curl into a smile._

Sasuke was silent as he took in her story. Sakura clenched her fingers in her lap, waiting for his reaction. Just as she had feared, when he turned to look at her, his expression was hard. Anger burned deep inside his eyes as he wordlessly stared at her. She shrank back a little and his eyebrows narrowed for an instant before he quickly turned his head away.

"How…How long?" he finally asked.

"About six months," she responded. She held her breath when she saw the muscles in his back tense, ready for his disgust to pour out. Maybe she was masochistic. But she waited for his judgment and his anger.

"What a scumbag," Sasuke coldly said.

And there it was.

Only it wasn't directed at her. Sasuke was looking at her and he was furious but not at her. His red eyes glared at her fingers clenching into the fabric of her shirt. The anger in his face was replaced by confusion as he looked carefully at her.

"Are you afraid of me?" Sasuke demanded. When she didn't respond, he reached out and grasped her arms, forcing them away from her body. She flinched just a little from where his fingers touched the still-tender spots on her wrists.

"When you're mad. You're only scary to me then," she said with a hollow laugh. Sasuke's hands stilled so instead she reached out and matched her fingers up against his. His skin was a little warm and a little rough.

"You should be mad at me too, Sasuke-kun. I let him use me. And I was using him too," Sakura suddenly insisted. But Sasuke's stare was just as even as calm. He shook his head and then he curled his fingers over hers.

"Any man who does that to a woman is the lowest kind of scum," he firmly said.

"You're… a really good friend, Sasuke-kun," she laughed.

"No I'm not," Sasuke immediately responded. Still smiling, Sakura used her free hand to pat his.

"You should get going. I've still got some work to do," she spoke as she almost reluctantly tried to free her fingers from his. But he wouldn't let her. Sasuke's expression was unreadable as he looked into her face.

"But you don't like to be alone."

Like he had pulled the thought straight from inside her head. He wasn't wrong. Sometimes, not very often though, she liked the silence of solitude. Late at night, going through patient files in the quiet was nice. But usually that emptiness was something she tried to avoid. It always felt somewhat wrong.

"We all have to be alone sometimes, Sasuke-kun. It's not a bad thing," Sakura responded. He watched her for another long moment before nodding. They both watched their fingers finally separate, hands falling to their sides. But Sasuke was still looking at her unsurely, as if he was debating whether or not it was really alright to leave her alone. Rising on her tiptoes, Sakura put her arms around Sasuke in a light hug.

"Thank you. You really are a good friend," whispered Sakura before she released him. The look on Sasuke's face- not quite shock, not quite confusion- didn't disappear when he nodded at her and then walked out of the tiny clinic. Still standing in the same spot, Sakura took another deep breath. Just as she looked toward her desk, a low groan from the corner of the room pulled her from her thoughts. As she walked over to Kiba's bed, she saw that one of his eyes was wide open, the other squinting against the pain ravaging his body. She patted his forehead, one of the only uninjured parts of his body. To her surprise, Kiba let out a wheezy laugh.

"Geez, Haruno. Did I miss the show?" Kiba rasped. When she looked confused, he waggled his eyebrows, undoubtedly misunderstanding her talk with Sasuke. Sakura's eyes widened as she stared down at him. But when she saw Kiba alive and smiling, she couldn't help the laugh that left her mouth.

* * *

><p>Reviews if you will, please.<p> 


	5. Squill

"Say, Sakura-chan."

There was the dry rustle of pages turning. Slowly, Sakura looked up from her notes. Naruto was lying on his back next to her, squinting intently at the large book in his hands. When she waggled ink-dyed fingers at him, he sat upright to show her what he had been staring at for so long inside one of her old medical encyclopedias.

"What's a breech birth?" Naruto inquired with wide blue eyes.

Sakura stared down at the diagram drawn out beside the words.

"It's when instead of being born head down, a baby comes out feet first," she explained, blinking the unexpected wetness out of her eyes.

"Isn't that bad for the baby? It can't breathe, right?" he prompted, eyebrows pinching together as he thought.

"Yeah."

"Does that mean the baby will die?"

"Sometimes," she said, trying to keep her tone light. Looking into his suddenly horrified expression, she could almost see the wheels turning in his head. Practically throwing the book aside, Naruto pulled her close.

"What are you doing, you idiot?" Sakura laughed as she lightly thumped him on the back.

"Sorry. I shouldn't have said that. That was stupid," Naruto muttered, arms tightening a little more.

She played it off easily, lightening the mood with a few jokes. And though Naruto's expression eased out and he lay back down to continue squinting and shaking his head through the rest of the thick book, Sakura stared unseeingly down at the notes she had been taking on the margins of the page. Glancing over at Naruto, she saw that he was still carefully observing the chapter on breech births again.

"You ever wonder if maybe that's the right way to be born and everyone else is born all wrong?" she muttered. Naruto didn't even look up.

"You say something?" Naruto asked.

"Nothing," sighed Sakura.

Entropy

Chapter 5: Squill

A drop of coffee had landed on her white coat.

It had been a gray Monday that had started too early after a long night out with Ino. Pressing a hot mug to her pounding right temple, Sakura had sat at the window, waiting for the samples to stop spinning inside the centrifuge. It was supposed to have been an easy day. Sorting samples, cataloguing pathogens- the sort of work she had once done as an apprentice. She almost missed this sort of work. The quiet of the lab on a weekend morning and the smell of slightly burnt coffee had been her life for a few years. Running around in the hospital in place of Tsunade after her retirement, though it gave her a great sense of fulfillment, was exhausting. Closing her eyes, Sakura had waited for the little series of beeps to tell her that it was time to move on to the next step.

And Naruto had burst in through the doors, panting and covered in blood that wasn't his as he choked out that war had just been declared. She remembered slamming her cup down.

And a drop of coffee, just one drop, had landed on the edge of her coat.

It was a little sad (in retrospect) that all she had to do was run home to grab the suitcase that had sat packed for months in preparation. It was a little sad that she wasn't as terrified as she was excited. With a quick kiss for each of her crying parents, she was sprinting out the gates after Naruto. Kakashi said that was proof that she had still been a child back then. Children don't understand war. Once you witness war, once you feel it in the core of your heart, a horrible black and ugly thing, Kakashi said, that was when you stopped being a child.

And now, three years later, Sakura sat staring at the little bit of coffee that had splashed onto her desk. With a sigh, she wiped it with the edge of her sweater and made sure that none of it had dripped onto the papers. Taking tiny sips, Sakura slowly shuffled through the latest file open on her desk. She had sent Takumi off to do some light taijutsu training with her boys (with a heavy emphasis on 'light') about an hour ago and it had become incredibly quiet in the clinic. Sakura hadn't realized just how much Takumi's questions and scurrying footsteps filled up the place. When she set her mug down on the desk, she felt Sasuke a moment before he knocked on the door once.

"Hey," she greeted. Spinning her chair around, Sakura caught an odd look on Sasuke's face. Dark hair falling into his eyes, he stepped inside and quickly shut the door. Even so, cold seeped inside. The space heater sitting next to her desk helped ward off the worst of the chill but Sakura couldn't help but shiver a little bit as the wind hit her. Sasuke stood in front of her, his dark eyes searching her expression for a long time.

"What's wrong?" asked Sakura after a long silence.

"Nothing. I just felt like coming here," replied Sasuke with a slightly sullen expression. Biting back a smile, Sakura ran her fingers through her hair before turning back to the files open on her desk. Sasuke stepped a little closer; a shadow fell across the papers as he leaned over to look too.

"How's Inuzuka?" asked Sasuke as he skimmed her scrawled words. Rolling her eyes, Sakura leaned back in her chair to look up at him.

"I'm keeping him sedated because he keeps scratching now," she huffed, shooting a little glare in the direction of the bed curtained off from the rest of the room. The silhouette of a lump lying in the bed was visible through the thin fabric. Sakura paused to listen for the sound of Kiba's deep exhale as he slept on. Other than changing his bedpans and swapping out his IV bags, there hadn't been much else to do for him as the healing balms took effect.

"Scratching?" repeated Sasuke with a frown.

"Regrowing skin is an itchy business," Sakura solemnly explained. He nodded without comment, eyes drifting to Kiba one more time before they returned back to her. Jotting down one last note to update Kiba's medical records, Sakura shut the folder and tucked it into its spot in the filing cabinet.

"Sorry to kick you out but I've got to go train a little. Do you want to come along?" Sakura offered, groaning a little as she stood. Stretching her arms high above her head, she felt her sore muscles and joints protest in unison. Pulling a cloak over her shoulders, Sakura looked in time to see Sasuke nod at her. He led the way out of the wooden cabin. Sakura followed while tugging her customary black gloves into place.

It had snowed a few days ago and there was a brittle covering of white all over the dead grass and mud. Sasuke glanced over his shoulder at her a few times before Sakura grabbed onto the back of his shirt and tugged a little. They both stopped with Sasuke half-twisting around to stare at her.

"What's wrong?" Sakura demanded with a little laugh. The suddenly sharp look Sasuke gave her almost made her take a step back. Chewing the corner of her lip, she watched him slowly reach out to trace the faint scar on the side of her throat, just under her jawline. She had gotten it almost a year before and it always went unnoticed. Even she had forgotten it existed at all. But Sasuke's eyebrows slanted low as he ran his fingers over it once and then twice before letting his hand fall away.

"Nothing," he finally muttered before he started walking again. What should have been the normal relaxed slouch of his shoulders looked sad- if sad was the right word to ever describe Sasuke properly. The sound of snow crunching under his shoes was too loud. Sakura hurried a few extra steps to duck under the arm hanging loosely at his side. With Sasuke's arm now slung over her shoulders, Sakura peered up at him to smile.

"Relax. I'm not that much of a pushover," Sakura said as brightly as she could. Before he could respond, Sakura bumped her hip against his and then hurried off to the cluster of men. There was a small section near the center of camp that had been cleared of all trees and tents. Sakura's approach went largely unnoticed as she quietly stepped up to them. There were two of her men grappling with each other. Roaring with laughter and jabbing half-heartedly, it was more of a way for them to let off extra testosterone rather than to hone their skills. Takumi stood off to the side, his eyes darting nervously between the two, probably fretting about the possible injuries that could occur each time someone moved.

Without warning, Sakura clenched her right hand into a fist and smashed it into the ground. The frozen ground cracked apart, sending the two toppling over and forcing Takumi to jump back.

"Good. Evade! But don't go on the defensive, Takumi. What do I always say to you?" Sakura yelled as she slammed her heel into the ground. Her apprentice stumbled a little, catching himself just in time to twist to avoid a large piece of rubble flying toward him.

"What do I say?" Sakura insisted. Charging forward, she aimed a bone-shattering punch at his face. Eyes wide, Takumi caught her fist with both his hands, his palms lighting up in an almost iridescent shade of bright green. The chakra cushioned the blow, absorbing the impact from a hit that would have probably broken all the bones up to his elbows. Pumping more chakra to his arms, he twisted to fling her aside. Sakura flipped, landing on her feet with a grunt of approval.

"My defense is my offense!" Takumi finally replied.

Nodding, Sakura took a deep breath before her hands glowed and then she took an odd step backward, feet fumbling and hands twisting awkwardly.

"Scrambling electrical impulses. Smart," she mused. For an instant, Takumi's gold eyes lit up with pride. But then the chakra gathered in Sakura's hands pulsated white, rippling up her arms and down her body like a shockwave.

"But not as smart to use a trick against the person who taught it to you," Sakura added.

Sakura didn't feel like going easy on him that day. They sparred for a few more minutes until she used a replacement technique to dodge his barrage of kunai. Appearing behind him, she caught him in a tight headlock, right hand glowing with a dangerously sharp chakra scalpel. After a few seconds, Sakura released him and mussed his hair.

"Pretty good. I think your speed's getting better," Sakura announced when Takumi turned around to stare at her with an expectant expression. Grinning brightly, he reached up to fix his hair. Nodding at one of her own men looking expectantly at her, Sakura took a few steps back, out of the circle the shinobi had formed. Glancing over her shoulder, Sakura wasn't surprised to find Sasuke right behind her, his arms crossed tightly over his chest. Fighting a smile, Sakura picked someone at random from the group and gestured for him to step into the circle as well. She oversaw the rest of the sparring, sometimes stepping in to offer advice and stamping her foot down a couple times to break up fights that were getting a little too intense. At one point, Sakura glanced back to raise her eyebrows at Sasuke who just stared back at her.

"You want a turn?"

"Pass," he grunted. To her surprise, two of his teammates piped up with easy smiles.

"Come on, Uchiha. You won't cause _too much_ lasting damage with Haruno-taichou around. Sure you don't want a go?" one of them teased.

"Yeah, Uchiha. I've got a pretty mean punch myself," another offered, tilting his head to the side.

"Don't give him any ideas. I don't want to be piecing together shattered prides along with jaws. Why don't you two give it a go?" Sakura laughed, deflecting their attention as she gestured to two relatively new faces from Shikamaru's team. As another pair stepped into the empty circle, Sakura poked at Sasuke's side with her elbow.

"You seem to be getting along better with your team," she noted in a low voice.

"…I guess so," Sasuke responded very slowly. Something about his tone felt slightly off. Mouth drawing down in a frown, she turned around. Her eyes searched his expression, for any clue. It had never been easy to figure out anything about Sasuke even when they were children. That much hadn't changed about him. Sasuke was Sasuke- broken and bitter but still himself in all the strangest ways. In response to her probing gaze, he raised an eyebrow at her.

"What's wrong?" she asked a second time. Her voice came out slightly more desperately than she had intended. Sakura put her hand on his arm, fingers curling around his bicep. Blinking once and then twice with those strangely soft brown eyes, Sasuke sighed.

"Stop bothering me," Sasuke said. Even though his voice was quiet, his words were just as piercing as she remembered. Thrown out in a careless breath, they dug into the crevices of her heart, settling into the cracks with a familiar throb of pain. Still, she smiled as she let her hand fall to the side. Even as she took a step away from him and she could see a flicker of something in his stare, Sakura let it drop. Sasuke always ended up hurting her. What was worse was that he never meant to hurt her. He just needed space. He needed time. He needed and needed and she needed to give so she told herself that the soft ache in her chest was something easy to ignore.

Turning on her heel, she crossed her arms over her chest and went back to watching the fight. In the short minute of their exchange, no one had even noticed Sakura's temporary lack of input. No one, at least, except Naruto standing on the opposite side of the circle. When he had joined, Sakura didn't know but their eyes met and even while she smiled, she could feel Naruto's blue gaze reaching out to her. It was almost annoying how well Naruto knew her, how easily he saw through her brave face. Sakura had to try her best not to tear up when she felt Sasuke's hand touch her shoulder for a brief moment before he slipped away.

It was an apology.

* * *

><p>Winter settled over the border so gradually that Sakura didn't realize how cold it had become until she stood in the clinic cranking the space heater up another setting. She was glad that they had thought to run power lines from base to the nearest town with electricity. They had buried the lines underground so they couldn't be traced but it was still only used minimally: heating water and the clinic.<p>

"Still cold?" asked Sakura. She pushed the heater away with her foot and walked over to Kiba's bed in the corner of the room. While she fiddled with the IV bag and marked down a few more things on his chart, Kiba's mouth pulled up in as much of a smile he could muster with his still-healing skin.

"Why? You offering to warm me up?" Kiba teased. Sakura brought her clipboard down on the top of his head where he was uninjured.

"Anything bothering you? Does anything hurt more than it should?" she asked. Recognizing her intent, Kiba struggled to sit up straighter against the pillows. As Sakura peeled the covers back, she kept a neutral expression. Even though she hadn't been there to witness Kiba's torture, his mangled body told her everything she wanted to and didn't want to know. Each scrape mark, each gouged patch of skin told her what shape the instrument was, how much force had been used. She might as well have been in the room with him, watching as he was peeled like a ripe fruit. Her expression must have slipped because she felt Kiba's fingers curl around hers as best they could through heavy wrapping. Sakura offered him her calmest smile while slipping out of his weak grasp.

With the help of medicines from the Hyuuga and Nara clans, she had formulated a topical salve to encourage cell regrowth and help control the excruciating burning and itching involved in growing skin. Large patches of his legs were wound with heavy bandages, coated with the stink of herbs. When Sakura pulled the edge of his gown up, Kiba coughed. He hadn't developed an infection but the skin on the tops of his thighs had grown irritated as of late and she had removed the bandages to allow more oxygen through.

"Never thought you'd be staring at my naughty bits again," he sighed. Sakura tried her best to keep a straight face but a smile pushed its way through.

"I hate to burst your bubble but pus and scabs aren't exactly my cup of tea, Kiba," she snorted, pulling the gown down to cover him again.

"But the good news is that nothing looks infected. I'm going to keep you on the antibiotic flush until the rash goes away just to be safe," she added. Dropping the jokes, Kiba let out a heavy sigh. As she sat on the edge of the bed, Sakura raised her eyebrows at him.

"Be honest, Sakura. How shitty do I look right now?" Kiba inquired after a long moment.

"Just as hideous as you were before. Why?" she responded lightly. The corner of his mouth lifted before he shook his head.

"Seriously."

The change in his tone made her really look at him. His tormenters had obviously taken their time with him. The top layer of skin and flesh from his left cheek had been neatly peeled off. His right cheek, already scarred, had been left alone, like an insult. Even with the missing parts beginning to grow back, Kiba looked like something out of one of her more macabre anatomy textbooks. Her gaze skimmed over his sheared neck and then to his raw arms. There would be heavy scarring, even with her help. His eyes followed hers almost anxiously and it struck her as odd how much her opinion seemed to matter to him in this moment.

"You look… like a pretty decent warrior," Sakura said after some careful thought. She pretended to be busy looking down at her hands when a single bitter tear wobbled out from his left eye to streak down his burning cheek. Kiba composed himself quickly and then Sakura went on like nothing had happened. She smoothed his sheets out and got him a cup of water before she pulled her cloak on. When she slipped out into the cool morning, biting air greeted her cheeks. Pressing her gloved hands to her ears to keep them from freezing, she walked over to the main tent to duck under the flap. As she coughed against the haze of smoke that choked her, Shikamaru ground his cigarette out against the tabletop.

"Hey there, Cap. You're looking miserable," Sakura greeted him, flicking a stray piece of ash off the table as she sat across from him. Shikamaru let out a dry laugh.

"Have you seen Naruto around?" he asked as he stared intently at the maps scattered around the table. Surely there was some sort of order to their arrangement but Sakura honestly only saw a mass of forest. Over time they had marked out their regular scouting paths along with the probable paths from enemies they had run into. Sakura considered herself somewhat intelligent but she couldn't figure out how Shikamaru's brain even processed so much information at once. Closing her eyes, she felt out across camp for Naruto's signature. It took less than a second. Eight years of trusting blindly in that chakra. For eight years they had watched each other's backs and sobbed the same angry tears of defeat and loss. They had picked each other up and kicked each other's asses when it was needed. Naruto was especially good at that. He had always been the one to shake her out of the emotional ruts she was prone to falling into during the end of the summer- right around the time of the year that Sasuke had left all those years ago.

And there was Naruto, striding over to the central tent. She could almost hear the confidence in his crunching footsteps.

"He'll be here in a second," Sakura responded. As she immersed herself in looking over the maps too, the tent flap was pushed aside a few moments later. Neither of them looked up to greet him. From the way he puffed out breaths and rubbed his hands together, it was clear who it was.

"How's Kiba?" Naruto asked as he put his hands on her shoulders. Sakura flinched away from the cold with a scowl.

"Naruto, he could get better care if we just sent him home. I don't mind being a personal nurse when there's no one else to treat but our equipment out here is just the bare essentials at best," Sakura began with an argument she had brought up at least three times before. Each time, both Naruto and Kiba had adamantly refused her proposal. It wasn't like there was a high-tech hospital staffed with the best nurses and doctors Konoha had ever had. (This was blatant bragging on Sakura's part since she had played a big part in training many of these employees.)

"Sakura-chan," Naruto groaned. He collapsed into a chair and then scooted over to be closer to her.

"What? They could make the same medicine back home. And it sure as hell's a lot cleaner!" she pointed out for what felt like the millionth time.

"But Sakura-chan, we've gone over this. We'd need people to take Kiba back home first of all. Second, they might have better **stuff** back home but we've got the best **medic **here," he listed off while counting on his fingers. Sakura shoved him with her shoulder.

"And Shizune's in Konoha. She's way better at all this skin and cosmetic stuff. I'm all about the squishy bits inside," Sakura added, wriggling her fingers for emphasis. Naruto wrinkled his nose. He put his right arm around her, squashing his stubbly cheek against the side of her face.

"Gross, Sakura-chan," Naruto almost whined and she could hear the echo of 13-year-old Naruto somewhere in his voice. Their exasperated stares met. Only when Naruto knocked his forehead into hers did she smile.

"I guess Kiba's just going to have to deal with your incompetence for a bit," teased Naruto with his best grin. Sakura stuck her tongue out before she tried to shove him off her. Naruto released her before she had a chance to swing a real punch at him.

"Okay, so what are you doing with all these maps? We already did a scout this morning and it was all clear," inquired Sakura.

"So you remember how Naruto's team went to rescue Kiba and discovered an enemy camp in the process?" Shikamaru began. Sakura nodded slowly, not liking the direction his words were heading. Of course Naruto had divulged all the details of the mission to her and Shikamaru upon his return two weeks ago. But glancing over at Naruto, she found that he looked just as confused as she felt at the moment.

"Well…I think I've figured out where the next nearest enemy camp is. I'm thinking of contacting 3 and 1 to come up with a unified plan of attack," explained Shikamaru.

Contacting the other camps by radio wasn't exactly the most efficient way to get things done but it was definitely the safest option. With voices buzzing in over the crackling speakers, they argued and brainstormed with the six other captains located at the northern border. 3 was so far away that they almost never journeyed all the way out to them. Then again, with Kakashi, Kurenai and Shino running things, Sakura wasn't too worried. The head medic taking care of things there was one of her former students. Whether she never asked for help was a testament to the captains' skill or her own was something Sakura could never figure out.

"Hey, Sakura," Kakashi suddenly interjected during a lull in conversation.

"Yes?" Sakura said without looking up. Her eyes followed the new paths Shikamaru was drawing in on his series of maps.

"You think you could make it out here? Sasaki-san says there's something she needs you to see," he said. Sakura didn't like the way his voice sounded. Tearing her eyes away from the map, Sakura stared at the radio speaker.

"Kei-chan said that?" she mused mostly to herself. Sasaki Kei had been in the first batch of medics Sakura had trained. Like her, Kei's talent lay within internal medicine and she had spent almost two years shadowing Sakura through the hospital before transferring to ANBU as a medic. It struck Sakura as strange that someone as competent as Kei would ever ask for assistance. And even as a trainee, Kei had always tried her best to do things on her own. Drumming her fingers against the tabletop for a moment, Sakura thought carefully. Shikamaru's gaze drifted to her as he capped his marker.

"It might be a good idea anyway. It's been a long time since you've had a chance to check up on things there," Shikamaru pointed out.

"You might want to keep the group small though, Haruno-san," Kurenai suddenly advised, "We've been running into a lot of trouble around here. It might be better to avoid being noticed."

"Take Sasuke," Naruto said.

Sakura blinked a couple times. Naruto blinked right back at her.

As she had predicted, her team wasn't too happy with this news but didn't complain in front of her.

"Make sure nobody does anything stupid while I'm gone," Sakura instructed Konohamaru who nodded proudly. There was some ribbing and jostling mixed with remarks from his teammates. But everyone knew that Konohamaru was most suited to take charge so even the most severe resentment was settled in a few joking insults.

Back in the clinic, Takumi sat at Sakura's desk to watch her pack. Opening up a glass cabinet, Sakura stared at one of the leftover vials of antidote she had prepared a few months ago. Something nagged at her gut when she remembered the sudden disappearance of the powerful poison. And something else scratched at the corner of her brain. The poison wasn't completely unfamiliar to her. It was similar to something she had seen before. But she had encountered so many different toxins from so many different countries that she honestly couldn't remember where. Lips twisting into a frown, she ignored that particular vial and grabbed handful of pills and emergency antidotes she might need.

"You know, sensei, if you really wanted this to be super-stealthy, you could just take someone from your own team. Isn't there someone from the Aburame's? Or Sarutobi-san…" Takumi said quietly. She glanced up at his reflection in the cabinet door. There was some curiosity in his tone.

She liked the sound of that.

"That's true. You've gotten smarter, Takumi," replied Sakura as she weighed a vial in her palm before slipping it into the top of her boot for easy access.

"So then…why choose Uchiha-san?" asked Takumi in an even softer voice. Sakura fixed Takumi with a careful look. She could tell that the boy didn't exactly dislike Sasuke. Then again, he was so young that he had probably only heard vague rumors about Sasuke's defection from the village. The generic rumor that gossiping housewives loved to spread around. And Takumi was too smart to really believe a rumor. Fully believe, at least.

Mouth pulling up into an impish smile, Sakura shrugged.

"Be good while I'm gone, okay? Make sure Kiba doesn't scratch all my hard work away or **I'll soak him in salt water when I get back**," she said, raising her voice a little so Kiba could hear. She saw his silhouette flinch past the curtain in response.

"I'll keep my mittens on, _sensei_," Kiba yelled as she walked out of the clinic. Takumi stood in the doorway, his teeth gnawing furiously on his lower lip. When she reached the eastern entrance, Sakura put her hand on her hip and waited for Sasuke to hop down from the nearest tree. He landed gracefully in the way that only Sasuke could ever manage to do. It was funny how they didn't need to say anything to each other. They looked each other over once before Sakura nodded and they slipped out of camp and past the genjutsu barrier, into the thick of the forest.

While the journey to 1 only took about half a day, the trek to 3 took about two full days. Three days if they took breaks and paced themselves. But there had been too much enemy activity during the past few weeks and Sakura couldn't get rid of the nagging worry that had hardened in the pit of her stomach. So they pushed themselves, sleeping a few hours less and eating two of their three meals a day on the go.

The first night, Sasuke built a fire out of hardwood that didn't give off much smoke. While he gathered the branches and lit everything with a small series of seals, Sakura dug into her rucksack for her journal. It was a thick, leather-bound book crammed with everything from records of surgeries to notes for developing new medicines. She had started using it just after starting her training under Tsunade. Ignoring Sasuke's questioning stare, she settled on a flat rock close to the fire and flipped through the thick pages. Sasuke bit into his rice ball before sitting on a rock next to hers. It was only when Sasuke had finished his dinner that Sakura reached the page she had been thinking of.

"Something's not right," she muttered mostly to herself as she ran her finger down the list of chemicals.

"What's not?" Sasuke asked.

"I'm not sure…" Sakura sighed. Finally looking up, Sakura saw that Sasuke's narrow face was glowing bright gold from the fire. She listened to the wood sizzling softly, to the occasional pop of sparks that exploded like tiny fireworks. And then she picked up a rice ball and crammed half of it into her mouth at once. She thought she saw Sasuke crack a hint of a smile at her lack of manners.

"I'm hungry!" she defended herself even though he hadn't spoken. Raising his eyebrows at her, Sasuke prodded at the fire with a long stick. As Sakura ate, they both looked into the flames. Not because it was awkward. It was just because there really was nothing else to look at in the darkness.

"Are you mad at me?" Sasuke suddenly demanded. He jabbed at the fire again, orange bits of light swirling into the air as he did. Digging the toe of her boot into the snow, Sakura slowly shut the book. It rested flat on her lap, heavy and slightly cold. Still not speaking, Sakura curled her fingers into fists and tucked them under the edge of her cloak.

"That's a stupid question to ask, you know," Sakura finally replied. A long, shaky exhale expelled white smoke from her mouth. She watched it spiral into nothingness, invisible wisps around her face.

"You're stupid," she added with a smile.

"Naruto chewed me out the other night. He said not to be such an asshole when you're just trying to be a good friend," Sasuke admitted in a slightly surly tone. His upper lip curled and Sakura knew he wasn't angry because Naruto had called him out. Sasuke was mad because he knew Naruto was right.

"I'm not trying anything, Sasuke. I'm just an idiot like that."

Implications. She hadn't meant it that way but as the words tumbled out, she realized just how cruel of a jab they were. That she would be foolish enough to be kind to even him. Like her kindness would never reach him anyway. Eyes widening, she looked over at Sasuke who was staring into the fire with nothing but intensity. There was no emotion. Just focus.

They were silent again. Sasuke began stoking the fire again- needlessly. He prodded at the crumbling wood and dug into ashes like he didn't even realize his arm was moving. Sakura wrapped her arms around her middle to keep warm. There was an extra blanket somewhere in her bag. And she knew Sasuke had packed a tent. But she couldn't move. It was so stifling- not the air, but just them being there.

Wordless and stuck.

It took a long time for her to find her voice again.

"We were born on the same planet, in the same year, in the same village. We ate the same things and watched the sun set over the same horizon. But somehow, you were always someone I could never reach. You were like some…some far-off being." Her words were quiet, subdued. His stare drifted from the crackling flames to her face.

"You seemed better than human. But somehow less than human too. For all your anger and stubbornness and your stupid hair that never lies flat, you were so perfect that it broke my heart a little bit more each time I saw you."

She smiled. It wasn't a tight expression.

"I know. You were in love with me," Sasuke responded in an equally soft tone. But she shook her head.

"I was in love with the **idea** of you. I loved everything I thought you were and all I hoped you could be," she corrected him. They listened to the fire murmur for a long minute.

"I never knew you. I still don't know," she added. When she prodded at the hot coals with a stick, sparks flew into the air. Smoke stung at her eyes as a breeze flowed through the swaying trees.

"If it's any comfort, I don't know you either. I come back and suddenly you're some tree-smashing beast sewing people back together," sighed Sasuke. Sakura turned her face away to hide her smile.

"You should be nicer to me then, Sasuke-kun. I can demolish boulders too," Sakura replied in a light voice. To her immense surprise, she thought she saw Sasuke smirk. Not in a cold way. Just in the way that the old Sasuke used to whenever he watched either her or Naruto doing something stupid.

"I think I'll take my chances. Naruto's still alive, isn't he?"

She knocked her shoulder against his.

"Naruto's got a thick skull though," she retorted.

In the morning, just when dawn was beginning to creep over the tops of trees, they were already moving. Chewing through handfuls of nuts and fruits, they ducked under branches and hopped over outstretched roots. There was something wrong in the air, something thick about the shadows and something a little too quiet about the air. It was normal to run into a few woodland creatures foraging for frozen berries and leaves in the snow. But their feet crunched through pristine white and there was no flash of tawny hide darting through the undergrowth. Sasuke didn't say anything but she could see it in his quick glances that he felt it too. His eyes burned bright red, searching the woods ahead as they broke into a sprint. That night, after camp had been set up, neither of them really slept. The stagnant silence of the forest screamed too loudly to get any real rest. They moved out before dawn, burying the ash from their small fire beneath the snow.

About 10 miles away from 3, a ripple of chakra hit them, so strong that it hit her in the gut like a physical blow. This wasn't what had been in place the last time she had come through with a few of her boys. Even as she focused on dispelling the genjutsu, she could feel the edges of her mind growing blurry. Everything wavered even as she blinked rapidly to clear her eyes. Fumbling blindly, she groped around until her left hand reached back and found Sasuke's. Squeezing her fingers into his tight enough that she was hurting herself, Sakura took in a shuddering breath.

"I can't get out," she ground out between clenched teeth.

"Neither can I," Sasuke hissed back, "Is this more of Kurenai's handiwork?" Before Sakura could respond, there was a shrill screech. Her head whipped up just in time to meet kunai slicing through the air. They embedded themselves in her skull, in her eye sockets, twisting and gouging as hot blood sprayed into the air. The sickening aroma of **person** sprayed out, filling the air with the smell of metal.

"Sasuke."

Her fingers slipped from his before she landed. A crumpled heap of flesh. The thud of her body hitting the ground was muffled by the snow. As the white around her began to darken to red, there was a soft voice.

"Sasuke."

Again, a distant call. The world blurred around the edges, softening and sharpening all at once. And then sharp pain erupted in the side of his face and Sasuke was blinking tears out of his eyes as his hand flew up to touch his cheek. It was hot to the touch from where he had just been slapped. And judging from the throb, it hadn't been a half-assed blow. Sucking in as much air as his lungs could handle, Sasuke stared up at Sakura. He filled her eyes with her so that he could forget the grinning face that had watched him from the direction the knives had flown from.

His own face.

* * *

><p>The genjutsu was one of Kurenai's sneakier tricks. It twisted things around, making its victims think it was their comrades being attacked instead of themselves. The first time she had been up against it, Sakura had watched Sai being dismembered until his smiling head had been tossed at her feet and Kurenai had been forced to release it herself. The reality of the horror was so strong that she always almost forgot that it was fake. Sakura had been caught in it for just a couple seconds before releasing it- before Sasuke could suffer his horrible false end. Sakura shook her head as she looked back to find Sasuke staring off into face, his right hand clutching at air.<p>

But this was Uchiha Sasuke. So she waited for a couple moments, waited for him to blink and then come back to reality with the same calm look on his face.

"Sasuke," Sakura said, nudging his calf with the toe of her boot. And then the exact opposite of what she had expected happened.

Sakura watched Sasuke's jaw clench, saw sweat bead at his temples. And then his eyes snapped open as wide as she had ever seen them. Mouth falling open in what could only be described as the look of absolute horror, Sasuke's right arm stretched out, reaching desperately for something. It sickened her, seeing Sasuke that way.

"Sasuke!" Sakura called again. When he remained unresponsive, she slapped him, infusing her palm with chakra to break the illusion. Sasuke toppled over, so graceless and so just not-Sasuke. Biting her lower lip, she crouched over him, lightly touching his throat and then pulling his eyelid up just to make sure he was okay. His eyebrows drew down in a fierce frown even before he opened his eyes. They stared at each other for a bit until Sasuke swallowed thickly.

"What're you doing with that dazed expression? Did you have a nice dream or something?" she teased. Because she had to. The look on Sasuke's face made her gut clench even though she had no idea what he was going to say. Sasuke reached up, his fingers grazing her cheek. It was only then that she could even see that his hand was trembling. The light brush of his skin against hers said so much but she just couldn't understand. His arm flopped back down pathetically.

"You…" Sasuke finally rasped out. Sakura waited patiently, balancing on the balls of her feet.

"How the hell are you joking around?" he demanded. As he waited for his answer, Sasuke pulled himself into a sitting position. And Sakura shrugged.

"Then would you prefer that I cry? Would that make you feel better?" Sakura replied with the same smile.

If anything, Sasuke just seemed to grow angrier.

"What the hell did you see that you're so cheerful?" he growled.

"I dispelled it just before I watched you get decapitated. But that's not important. It wasn't real," she responded in as casual a tone she could muster. Because really, she was trying her best to hide that her hands were shaking. She clenched her teeth in a smile. Sasuke was just lashing out because he felt vulnerable. He was scared and Uchiha Sasuke didn't know **how** to handle being scared so she told herself that it was okay to just smile and let it go.

"It's not…important?"

Sakura kept quiet as Sasuke's face contorted. The haughty look of distaste that Sakura remembered from their youth emerged. She steeled her heart against words that she knew he would regret.

"Really? It doesn't matter to you? It must be nice to live so thoughtlessly like you." Piercing words. Knives, really, that flew from his mouth. Sakura wanted to keep her pleasant expression, to let him vent and then go on like nothing had happened. He would apologize later, always genuinely sorry. If she gave him enough time, he would explain what had upset him, remind her that she was a good person for putting up with him. Only this time, Sakura felt something snap inside her.

"Then should I start sniveling? When I was little, when every night I would watch you leaving Konoha in my dreams and I would wake up crying- should I do the same thing now? Should I sob like a fool that you're gone and do nothing?" she found herself snapping back. Her voice rose higher and higher until she was screaming at him with her hands clenched into angry fists.

For the first time in her life, Sakura found it ridiculously easy to read Sasuke.

He couldn't say the say he was sorry. He couldn't even find words. An emotion that had no name just surfaced- something she had seen on Naruto when she had finally lost her temper with him one day and screamed that Hinata was in crazy, ridiculous love with him. It was the expression on Sai's face when Sakura had told him to stop being so dense and realize that he was one of her best friends. It was the look on Kiba's face when she had asked to break up because neither of them was in love with each other. That look should have been satisfying. To see Sasuke proven so **wrong** and so obviously regretful should have been a triumph. Instead, the indignation just boiled hotter. She grabbed the collar of his shirt, shaking him just to make herself feel a little better. All the color had drained out of Sasuke's face and he was still dazed from the genjutsu but Sakura really couldn't bring herself to be kind.

"You're hurt. And I'll never experience the same things you have. I'll never _get_ your pain, okay? But don't you dare belittle what I've gone through. And don't you dare act like I haven't suffered too," Sakura snarled. Swallowing thickly, she released him and then sat back on her haunches. Letting out a noisy sigh, she avoided looking at Sasuke just sitting where she had shoved him and instead tried to take calming breaths. They sat there long enough for Sakura's toes to start to cramp from their squished position inside her boots. It was around then that there was a flicker of very familiar chakra. There was a faint rustle from one of the frozen trees and then Kakashi dropped to his feet right next to her.

"Pakkun heard some yelling so I was worried I'd have to put you two in time-out," he greeted them. Rolling her eyes, Sakura raised her hand toward him. Kakashi grasped her forearm, she grasped his, and he pulled her to her feet.

"Very funny, senpai. Why aren't your radio channels open? We didn't know about the genjutsu's reach being extended this far out," Sakura huffed as she tapped at the small black piece in her ear. She had tuned it to the usual frequency to communicate with the sentries but had been receiving nothing but a low level of static. Her eyes narrowed as she watched Kakashi's visible eye flicker around to scan the trees. When their stares locked, Sakura understood that it definitely wasn't safe to talk out here.

She ran ahead of Sasuke and Kakashi. Though Sasuke had stood and brushed the snow off his legs, he was unusually quiet even by his usual standards. From Kakashi's stare focused on the back of her head, Sakura knew he had caught on to the strange atmosphere between them. He had probably heard most of if not all of their argument but Sakura was happily ignoring him for the next few miles. They hit a second genjutsu, this one much kinder on the psyche and much more easily dissolved. There were sentries set up in some of the trees but they seemed to easily recognize her.

"We'll do formalities later. Sasaki-kun has her hands full at the moment," Kurenai said as soon as they saw one another. Sakura nodded as she strode past. Base 3 had the same basic layout as the two other camps along the northern border of Fire Country. The central tent in the middle with tents for the individual soldiers scattered around. On the edges was a large canvas tent with smoke coming from an open window flap- definitely the mess hall. And on the other side of the clearing was a slightly smaller tent. And as soon as the wind was blowing in the right direction, Sakura could smell something so **wrong **that she actually broke into a run.

Rotting. Decay. Not even blood, not an infected wound. It was the smell of a corpse. Sakura sniffed again. More than one corpse.

"Kei!" Sakura called before she even touched the tent flap. She pushed past it, preparing herself for something horrific. She sucked in a hollow breath as she let her gaze fall on the nearest occupied bed. Kei, with her dark brown hair pulled back into a tight bun, was bent over the patient. Hearing Sakura, she turned around to reveal used bandages clenched in her gloved hands. Instead of blood, there was a dark red-almost black liquid soaking the linen. And there was another layer of something viscous and clear on top of it.

The stench.

The stench was horrible.

"Necrosis," Kei uttered.

"How many patients?" Sakura demanded as she ripped her black gloves off and threw them onto a random tray. She stood pulling clean latex gloves on while Kei glanced around.

"Three," she responded after some hesitation. Sakura turned and noted a fourth occupied bed. When she raised her eyebrows, Kei just shook her head.

"Three surviving patients, sensei," Kei whispered.

Skin rotting from the flesh of a living person. Sakura had only seen this occur a handful of times in the hospital back home. Often it was the work of some sort of viral or fungal infection. With the right medication and organ donations, patients very often survived. But Kei had already run through the blood work and found nothing of the sort. There were just dying cells and an unidentified toxin that ripped through the body, tearing everything apart. Sakura paused for a moment to stare into the microscope set up on Kei's desk. She switched between slides, comparing the samples a few times before she realized what she was seeing.

"I'm sorry, sensei. I've analyzed the components, but I can't seem to identify the toxin," Kei sighed as she continued redressing someone's wounds. Sakura didn't even need to see the state of the open flesh to know that it would be bubbling with pus and dark blood. The smell was so strong that she wanted to gag a little. Keeping a straight face, Sakura looked up from the microscope to jot something down on the margins of Kei's notes.

"There have been drastic changes but the cell damage doesn't look much different This is the same poison from a few months ago," Sakura sighed.

"But the effects are so different," Kei protested.

"The previous poison encouraged premature cell death. This is just the same thing amplified. They were using us as test subjects to refine it. And I think now it's complete." As she spoke, Sakura peered into the microscope again.

"I don't like the way this looks, Kei. Can you run an analysis on this one more time? Something doesn't feel right," requested Sakura. She took over for Kei, redressing wounds and cleaning festering skin as best as she could. Once everyone was clean and sedated, Sakura settled on a stool and pushed her chakra into the nearest patient. She felt a little guilty for not knowing who this person was but the roster had changed since her last visit to 3 so there were many new faces. At the same time, it was a little easier to survey the damage to his body when he was just a nameless patient.

"Liquefactive necrosis," Sakura muttered as she closed her eyes to concentrate better. She followed the pathway of collapsing blood vessels and dying muscles. After recording her observations in her leather-bound journal, Sakura pulled her sleeves up to begin healing. It was an exhausting process. First she had to heal cells enough that they could resume their normal processes but the toxin seemed intent on destroying just as quickly as she could restore. But to have time to purge the toxin from the system, she needed to heal the body enough for it to be able to handle the stress of a poison extraction. Sweat beaded on her temple and on the back of her neck as she pushed more chakra into the faltering body.

They had arrived at 3 just before noon that day. Sakura didn't stumble out of the medical tent until just before midnight. After a few steps, her knees wobbled and there was a hand grabbing hold of her upper arm.

"We have a couple open tents. You should take a break, Sakura-chan," Kakashi said as he held her until she could regain her balance. Scowling, Sakura shook her head.

"I need to talk to you right now. Is everyone awake?" she croaked. Kakashi looked her over from blood-covered sleeves to gaunt expression.

"Kurenai's gone to bed already and Shino's busy doing some intelligence-gathering. We'll talk in the morning. You should get cleaned up and get some sleep," Kakashi insisted. They stared each other down before Sakura realized that a bath sounded wonderful. But the river nearby would be frozen and she was not keen to jump into icy waters. As if reading her thoughts, Kakashi released her arm and jabbed his thumb toward the south.

"Let me show you one of the reasons Kurenai extended her genjutsu," he said. As they walked through the mostly sleeping camp, Kakashi slowed down a little to let her catch up. Putting his arm over her shoulders, Kakashi fixed her with a look.

"Is everything okay?" Kakashi inquired in a low voice. Chewing on her bottom lip, Sakura shrugged.

"I kind of lost it and said some pretty shitty stuff to Sasuke," she admitted with a little twinge of guilt. Kakashi huffed out a muffled laugh through his mask.

"You know, Naruto and I are still waiting for you to beat him to a pulp. Whatever happened to you giving Sasuke a good ass-kicking when he came home?" he asked teasingly.

"Stop it, Kakashi-senpai. I smell like blood and I really want to wash up," Sakura sighed. She was so exhausted that she couldn't even keep up their usual playful banter for long. Dropping the subject, Kakashi stopped for a moment.

"Ah, good timing. Sasuke, you should come with us. We usually only need one person to stand guard but this is the **lovely** Sakura-chan," Kakashi said, whacking a foot dangling off a tree branch. There was a slightly awkward pause and for a moment, Sakura thought that Sasuke would refuse. But then he hopped down, graceful and as stoic as ever. Their eyes met for a moment and Sakura frowned a little as she quickly looked away.

"I thought you were taking me to some secret place of magical hygiene. Why are you bringing him?" Sakura asked as Kakashi started off again. Kakashi hummed.

"You'll see," he just responded. They walked out of the south entrance, nodding to the two sentries on duty. There were probably more scattered in the trees further away but they were keeping themselves well-hidden. Sakura's eyes flickered between Kakashi and the trees as she realized that they were wandering quite far from the relatively safety of camp. Thankfully, Sasuke trailed a little behind them, sparing Sakura from having to figure out what kind of expression to face him with.

About fifteen minutes into their nearly silent walk, Sakura sniffed at the air and wrinkled her nose. Glancing at her sour expression, Kakashi chuckled.

"This is the best thing about being stuck out here in the mountains," Kakashi said.

"An onsen?" It was the first time Sasuke had spoken and Sakura almost jumped at the sound of his voice.

"We weren't as fortunate as you guys to have plumbing. We stumbled onto this place about half a year back and it's been the greatest thing ever. Normally we come out here in groups of five or six. One guy guards while the rest bathe," explained Kakashi as they climbed over a few fallen tree trunks.

"Sulfur. Can't say I like the smell but a bath sounds good," Sakura sighed. She spotted steam rising up ahead. Puzzled, she tugged onto Kakashi's sleeve to get his attention.

"I know you've extended the perimeters of Kurenai-san's genjutsu. But what about the steam?" asked Sakura, pointing at the white trail of vapors curling up into the gray sky. Kakashi raised his silver eyebrows.

"Don't worry. You'd be surprised at how high up she can get the coverage; besides, water vapor dissipates pretty quickly," he said with a shrug.

They reached the actual hot spring a couple minutes later. The actual pool of water had been achieved by digging into the side of the mountain. As a result, what was left was a hot spring with a natural wall of solid rock behind it. Surrounded by thick covers of trees, it was a relatively isolated spot that lent itself quite well for a relaxing soak as long as proper precautions were taken. Sakura put her fists on her hips and turned to face the two men.

"If either of you peek-" she began in a warning. But Kakashi interrupted with an exaggerated sigh.

"I'm sure neither of us feels like being smashed into the side of a mountain today. I swear on my mother's grave that I won't peek," Kakashi assured her with a hint of a laugh. Leveling him with a stern look, Sakura shook her head.

"Swear on your entire collection of written filth," Sakura ordered.

"It's classy literature," Kakashi insisted. When Sakura just continued to stare, he grumbled something under his breath.

"I swear on my collection of _Icha Icha_. And Sasuke swears on it too. Now hurry up. I want to get back before all the beer's gone." When she was sure that neither of them were peeking, Sakura dropped her bag to the ground and hurriedly shed her clothing. Yelping when her feet made contact with the snow, she ran the last few steps before she carefully stepped into the hot water. The liquid was clear but there was the smell of minerals that was almost intolerably strong when the steam first hit her full in the face.

"Be sure to get behind the ears," Kakashi reminded her.

"Yes, **mother**," Sakura snorted. She sunk down low in the water, blowing bubbles. As she watched, Kakashi shifted his weight to one foot and his hand reached into his back pouch.

"If you start reading your porn while I'm naked behind you…" Sakura growled. Slowly, Kakashi's hand retreated to rest innocently on his right thigh. Eyes closed, Sakura let her head fall back to rest against the rocky wall.

"You look tired," he remarked after a while.

"So do you," she responded in the same worn out voice. She leaned back, wetting her hair in the bubbling water. Her mother always told her about all the health benefits of natural hot springs but Sakura was certain that it was probably the most beneficial for her mental wellbeing. The roiling water eased the kinks out of her shoulders and back like a talented masseuse. As sticky blood was cleansed from under her fingernails, Sakura could almost forget the smell of rotting flesh.

Almost.

"There's something missing," Sakura suddenly remarked out loud. Lifting a foot out of the water to check if her toes were wrinkly yet, Sakura let out a frustrated sigh.

"What is?" It was Sasuke and not Kakashi that had asked the question.

"Poisons and any manner of chemical warfare have to be made by someone. And every person has a sort of chemical signature. It's not intentional. Just the way that they combine ingredients and choose one compound over another gives them away," she explained. When she caught sight of her wrinkled fingers, she decided that she had been soaking for long enough. She stood, a violent shiver running through her when the cold air made contact with her skin. Steam rose off her as she caught the towel Kakashi threw backwards at her.

"Anyway, I did notice some sort of signature but I can't figure out who it is. There aren't many people in the world with the technical proficiency to pull off a powerful agent like this one," Sakura continued. Toweling her hair dry, she stepped out of the water and onto a fallen log so she wouldn't have to be standing on snow barefoot.

"How good would someone have to be?" Sasuke queried. Sakura paused for a moment to think. Pulling her underwear on, Sakura chewed on her lower lip.

"I'd say about my level or higher?" she said after a moment. While she busied herself dressing, Sakura watched the tense line of Sasuke's shoulders.

"Do you think it could be Kabuto?" asked Sasuke in a stiff voice.

"No way. He usually relied on ingredients from up north. This stuff is all from down south…almost like…. Almost like it's familiar…" Sakura trailed off. At her silence, both Kakashi and Sasuke turned around to look at her.

"Son of a bitch!" she spat. She didn't even care that they had broken their promise not to peek at her. In her hurry to shove her feet into her boots and throw her cloak over her shoulders, she nearly fell backwards into the water.

"What's going on?" Sasuke demanded as he and Kakashi trailed Sakura's frantic dash through the forest. Holding onto the used towel Sakura had flung at him in her rush, Kakashi just shook his head.

"I don't know. But I think it's best not to get in her way," he answered quietly.

They arrived back at camp in under five minutes and Sakura didn't even stop to chat with the guards or greet anyone. In fact, all she did was pull her wet hair up in a ponytail in rough yanks as she screamed, "KEI!"

"Sensei, what's wrong?" the girl asked, running out of the tent.

"Tell me you're done with that poison analysis," Sakura said, sweeping past her to duck into the canvas tent.

"Almost."

"And do we have a clean sample of the poison from the weapon?"

"Stored over there in that vial."

"Get me a syringe," Sakura ordered. She popped the top off a bottle of iodine and dunked a cotton ball into it. While she disinfected the skin inside her elbow Kei ran around gathering the materials.

"Sensei, what are you doing?" Kei sputtered as Sakura plunged the syringe into the top of the vial.

"I'm going to need you to keep me hydrated. Don't let my potassium levels drop and- one last thing. Kei," Sakura said her name in a steely voice. She waited until Kei was staring her in the eyes to speak again.

"Do **not** heal me. I don't care how dire it looks, **don't** heal me. Do you understand?" she instructed. Only when Kei tentatively nodded did Sakura grit her teeth and stab the syringe into her skin. As she pushed the plunger in all the way, the tent flap moved and Sasuke and Kakashi walked in, no doubt drawn by the noise.

"Sakura?" Kakashi slowly said, eyeing the syringe and then Kei's horrified expression.

"Chair, Kei," Sakura ground out. Fire spread slowly through her veins. It radiated from her arm, down to her fingertips and up into her shoulder. Kei pushed her into an open chair and then hurried to hook her up to an IV drip.

"Please tell me you didn't do anything rash and stupid," Kakashi begged in a tone that implied that he knew the very opposite. Cracking her best smile, Sakura sucked in a deep breath through her nose.

"I didn't. I did something rash and very, very brilliant," she responded.

And in the next instant, a thin line of blood dripped down from the corner of her laughing mouth.

* * *

><p>I won't apologize for the insane delay between chapters because school has devoured my life and my soul. I would, however, really appreciate reviews as encouragement. Thanks for reading.<p> 


	6. Cyclamen

Hope everyone's been enjoying 2013. This chapter's pretty rough and unrefined but I've hit a sort of rut in terms of writing so I'm giving myself a little break. So here's the severely-delayed chapter 6.

Enjoy!

* * *

><p>"I WIN!" Sakura roared as she sprang to her feet. Letting out a loud groan, Naruto grabbed the deck of cards off the table and flung them into the air. To his left sat Kakashi quietly nursing his sore hand against his cold drink while playing cards rained down on his silvery head.<p>

"In your faces!" she sang with glee. Sai stared down at his reddened hand.

"I think something might be broken," he quietly admitted. Looking up, Naruto and Kakashi were eyeing him with identical expressions of misery.

"Seriously. I don't know why we keep playing Egyptian ratscrew against Sakura-chan," Naruto sighed.

"All she ever does is destroy our hands," Kakashi agreed.

"Don't be such sore losers!" she sang, twirling around on her stool.

"You're a mean drunk, Sakura," Naruto grumbled.

"Come on, boys. Next round of drinks is on you three," Sakura laughed, throwing her arms around Naruto's shoulders, mashing her cheek against his until he was smiling too.

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 6: Cyclamen

A feverish, trembling night passed. When the sun crept warily over the horizon, the sleepy camp stirred awake to the sound of static-filled shouting from the central tent.

"She did what?" Naruto hollered over the radio. Kakashi stuck one finger in his ear with a sigh. Kurenai sat, legs crossed and arms crossed even tighter. Her usual shade of bright red lipstick was absent. Shino stood next to her, so calm that he almost didn't seem to belong there.

"Now, Naruto, yelling isn't going to fix anything. That was Sakura's choice and she is an adult," Kakashi said. But there was sputtering from Naruto's end.

"I know that! But this is crazy! She'll kill herself!" Naruto insisted. There was some more crackling.

"I hate to be a downer, but she did once donate so much of her blood to you that she almost died, Kakashi-san," Shikamaru drawled in.

"When it comes to her comrades, Sakura-san spares herself very little thought," Shino agreed.

"But you're forgetting that she's the best of the best, Naruto. She knows what she's doing," Kakashi argued.

"That's what worries me," Naruto responded in a quieter tone.

"I'm sure she'll come out of this fine. I know her just as well as you do-" began Kakashi in one of his falsely cheerful tones that had failed to pacify Naruto for years.

"No you don't!" Naruto interrupted, "You don't even know that Sakura-chan can't...forget it. Keep us updated on her condition." He trailed off in an unusually surly tone. Kakashi glanced over at Kurenai to make sure he wasn't hearing things. She looked perplexed as well.

"What's Sasuke doing?" asked Naruto suddenly. Kakashi's silver eyebrows rose.

"The role of rabid guard dog sounds about right," grumbled Kakashi.

At the same time, Sasaki Kei was keeping careful records.

At 1:48 am, her trusted mentor had injected herself with a fatal toxin. With her skill, the needle had easily reached a vein. It had hit the bloodstream almost instantly. Fever spiked less than a quarter of an hour later.

Even if Sakura hadn't instructed her not to interfere, Kei doubted she could have made much of a difference. The dose was almost triple what most people didn't survive. But she did as instructed. Kei tended to the three survivors, healing as much as she could without draining her reserves. She changed bedpans, checked IVs. It wasn't that she didn't care. Even just a short time following a girl barely older than herself around a huge hospital had been such a life-changing experience that Kei knew she would forever be in Sakura's debt. If she knew how, she would fix everything now, bring Sakura back. But this poison had her absolutely stumped and more than useless. It didn't seem to matter too much to everyone that Kei was helpless in this situation.

Because Uchiha Sasuke had set himself up in the tent like some murderous, terrifying guardian angel.

Sasuke stood with his hands deep in his pockets, cold eyes fixed on Sakura like a gloomy statue. Her whimpers, her grinding teeth- they seemed to have no effect on him. Kakashi couldn't stand to watch her writhing for more than a minute before quietly excusing himself. And Hatake-taichou had a reputation for being such a tough man. Only Uchiha Sasuke could stay. A person of stone with a heart made of stone too, Kei told herself whenever her eyes were drawn to his tall figure.

At first, it was Kei that Sakura called for in her feverish delirium. Trapped inside a rotting body, only Sakura could know what was going on inside. She trusted Kei to take accurate notes, a log of the poison's progress from the outside. That had always been Kei's greatest strength and her weakness. She could continue to function even in the worst situations, detach her heart from everything. The exact opposite of Takumi. And that was why work out in the field suited her. Anyone tending to such gruesome injuries during war needed to either close off her heart or pretend not to feel at all.

As each organ system faltered, Sakura called for the girl- to tell her what to write. At first this arrangement seemed to work until Sakura's body began to struggle. Her breathing began to come in hoarse rattles. And the other patients' conditions worsened, Kei began to find herself occupied with just keeping them alive. So it was Sasuke that began to reach her first. And so she told him what to write instead. Even if he didn't know what he was writing or how to spell some of the more complex names, he never complained. If she hadn't been able to feel his chakra, she might not have even noticed him for his silence. When the time came that her chakra needed to be pooled just to keep her liver from rupturing, it was the feel of his calloused palm brushing her forehead each time he placed a cool cloth there that remained to comfort her in the darkness as her eyes failed too. Eventually, it was only Sasuke she ever seemed to call for. And somehow, he was always there.

Time passed differently in this self-inflicted hell. Whenever Sakura seemed to be on the verge of restoring one organ, time slowed to sluggish crawl. It was a furious uphill battle to heal cells and to mend connections. And when her damn kidneys were ready to burst for the millionth time, everything suddenly didn't seem to deteriorate fast enough. The liver refused to work, her lungs wheezed pathetically until she felt herself choking not on something but on nothing. Rushes of agony and numbness seized her tortured body at random.

It was the numbness that always scared her. Being in pain meant that her body was still fighting.

Later, Sasuke told her that it was the third day, her heart gave out. The muscle pumped, faltered, pumped twice, and then fell silent. In the few seconds where there was still enough oxygen to think clearly, all Sakura could focus on was how irritating the shrill beep of the heart monitor was in her ear. But then everything went silent.

Haruno Sakura was dead for 42 seconds.

Growing desperate, Kei infused her first with chakra and slammed it down onto Sakura's chest. The jolt restarted everything. Sakura scraped down greedy gasps of precious oxygen as she tried to adjust to the fact that nothing was different. She lay heaving for a long time as she listened to her heart pounding in her ears. And slowly, the skin on the backs of her hands and on her forearms began to peel, to swell and fill with pus before the flesh began sinking into itself, melting away.

She was rotting.

Day 5 was the day that searing pain split through her skull. For the past few days, Sakura had gotten quite good at mashing her lips together to silence herself during the worst moments of agony. But this time, it was burning sensation that skewered straight into her forehead and deep into her head until tears were streaming down her cheeks. She knew right away that the poison had reached the brain membrane. The chemicals were reacting violently with the compounds in spinal fluid and blood and that was precisely when she decided that it was time to stop just healing damage and to start cleansing her system.

After all, this was something she had made.

Clenching her teeth together, Sakura took a deep breath and then focused on the tiny pinprick of energy in her chest. She imagined pulling a particularly stubborn cork out of a bottle of wine. Just some finagling and wriggling until it finally popped out and fizzy drink would burst forth. After some effort, Sakura tapped into the yin seal hidden on her chest and ripped it open. Chakra burst forward, enveloping her body in soft green warmth. It swathed her organs, curled around her fraying muscles. Coiling deeper and deeper, it dug into her spinal column, flooding everything until the pain had receded to an almost forgettable level.

"Kei, blood sample," she rasped out. Over the pounding of her own heart, Sakura could hear the girl running toward her. The syringe was pressed into her palm, still cold from its sterile wrapper. She pressed the needle into the soft flesh inside her left elbow. It sunk in easily and then she slowly pulled the plunger out until she was sure that it was full. As soon as she pulled the point of the needle out, she felt the skin close up around it. She waited for Kei to take the sample away before viciously attacking the poison.

Lying there for days hadn't just been an exercise of masochism. As she let the poison rip through her body, she had observed its patterns, noted the way it interacted first with certain systems before moving on to others. She didn't have an antidote. She didn't need one now. She had all the information she needed to destroy it on a molecular level. And as she tore the bonds apart, reducing chemical chains into fragments of sad nothing, she hated how easily she recognized the key structures binding the compounds.

Her fever burned wild for another night. Sakura had to stop every once in a while to roll onto her side and heave into a bucket. Eventually, there was nothing left for her stomach to reject so it was just her body convulsing in dry retches that made her chest ache. And if that wasn't bad enough, every inch of her skin itched furiously. Everything flaked and peeled off as new skin grew underneath, pushing its way to the surface- bright pink and excruciatingly sensitive. Even the rub of her clothes against the new flesh chafed and burned.

The eighth day, with most of her body functioning properly again, Sakura finally spared the time to work on her eyes. Mending the split connections and twisting nerves back into their normal pathways, it only took a few hours for light to begin seeping in through her cracked eyelids. As her chakra receded, Sakura opened her eyes and blinked to adjust to the bright glare of the lamp beside the bed. Her eyeballs swiveled around several times before they focused on the tall, sharp silhouette standing at the foot of the bed.

"You have a beard," she rasped out.

"Your eyes are blue," he simply said. Sakura rubbed at the side of her nose.

"They are? I guess the melanin needs time to set," she sighed.

"Stupid," Sasuke suddenly remarked.

She lay on her back, burning eyes cast up to the thin roof of the tent. They listened to large, wet flakes of snow patter against the canvas. She drew in a shaky breath. When her gaze flickered to him again, she found Sasuke watching her intensely.

"Did you know, when I was little, I used to dream about waking up with you next to me?" she croaked. For a split second, his upper lip twitched, like he was holding a smile back. He leaned back in his chair and the cheap plastic creaked.

"Not exactly like this, I'd imagine," he responded. She ran her tongue across her teeth. She tasted blood in her mouth.

"I don't know. This feels pretty romantic to me," she grunted as she tried to sit up. Huffing and puffing, she ignored the sharp pain in her gut and managed to pull herself upright. As she leaned forward to catch her breath, forearms pressed to her knees, she heard him let out a quiet snort.

"Great ambiance you've got going here," he remarked. That made her laugh. And the laugh made her hiss as everything inside her seemed to scream with pain at the sudden exertion. Sucking in a sharp breath, she lay back down. With her eyes squeezed shut, she gritted her teeth to stop a very rude word from rolling off her dry tongue. And because everything in her body was just different levels of **hurt**, she let the exhaustion grab her and drag her under for a little while longer.

"The idiot's foaming at the mouth, you know," Sasuke told her the next time she clambered her way into some form of consciousness. It didn't take long to figure out who he was referring to. It had stopped snowing outside but it was hard to tell how much time had passed from the gray light filtering in through the thick cover of clouds above.

"He's blaming Kakashi and me now. Yesterday he was threatening to come here to check on you," Sasuke informed her, rolling his eyes just a little. While she listened, Sakura struggled to sit up again. The still-raw muscles in her abdomen protested so she settled for turning onto her side, arm flailing to reach for the IV bag hooked dangling from the metal stand. After a couple tries, her fingers grabbed onto the clear plastic tube leading into her left arm. She hesitated for a moment when she saw the patch of pink extending from her wrist up to her knuckles. Some of the flesh around the edges was scabbed, still waiting to emerge from darkened patches.

"Well you can tell Naruto to….calm…his tits," Sakura grunted as she managed to yank the bag down into her lap. She turned back in time to catch the end of the smile that stretched his mouth. Sucking in a deep breath, Sakura grasped the railings on one side of the bed.

"Can you help me up, Sasuke? I need to talk to Kakashi-senpai," she requested. He walked over, hands in front of him as he tried to figure out where to put them. A huff of laughter left Sakura's mouth as she grasped his wrists and helped him out. With his right arm hooked under her knees and his left hand supporting her back, Sasuke gingerly lifted her out of the bed and moved to set her bare feet on the ground. He hesitated, eyes darting from her toes to the packed dirt underfoot.

"It's fine. I'm sure my shoes are around here somewhere," Sakura insisted, lightly patting Sasuke's shoulder. But he didn't move. Sasuke just stared at her for a long moment before he set her back down on the narrow hospital bed.

"Wha-" Sakura started to protest when Sasuke yanked the edges of her blanket around her. Wrapping her up like some invalid spring roll, he lifted her into his arms. She fixed him with a half-hearted glare but his expression was so grave that she couldn't stop her smile. So Uchiha Sasuke marched out of the tent, swaddling Haruno Sakura like an overgrown baby. The most bizarre part of his spectacle was that Sakura was laughing, pink cheeks growing pinker in the cold and that there was a hint of a smirk curling at Sasuke's lips. Without so much as announcing himself, Sasuke ducked into the central tent and lowered Sakura into a chair. Kurenai and Shino sat on the other side of the table, staring.

"Hello. I'm alive," Sakura greeted them.

"That's good," Shino responded evenly.

"Kakashi! There's a nice surprise for you," Kurenai called out. There was pause and then they heard footsteps crunching through the frozen snow covering the ground in a brittle sheet.

"Hm? A gift for me?" answered Kakashi in his lazy drawl before he pushed the tent flap aside and ducked inside. He had undoubtedly felt Sakura's presence earlier but still feigned at least a small amount of surprise. Or maybe he wasn't pretending.

Sakura watched Kakashi's visible eye widen as he looked her over. She reached out to hook her index finger with his. Swinging his arm childishly, she fixed him with her brightest grin.

"You're looking lively, Miss Corpse. I thought Sasuke was developing a case of necrophilia," Kakashi finally said. Kurenai quickly covered her mouth in an effort to hide her smile. Laughing, Sakura swatted Kakashi's arm hard enough to make him flinch. When he grunted from the pain, she put on an innocent expression of bewilderment.

"So, I'm assuming from your state that you have good news for us?" Shino spoke up. Smiles faded as Sakura stared down at the patches of newly-grown skin on her forearms and hands. She flexed her fingers, feeling the tightness of new muscles.

"Well…the good news is that I know what's been poisoning and killing off so many of us. And I think I can formulate an antidote," she slowly began. They waited for her to continue. Her pause was longer than necessary because she almost didn't want to believe what she was about to say. Twisting her hands together inside her blanket, Sakura took a deep breath.

"I need you to get Shizune on the radio, please. She needs to hear this too," Sakura finally said. A few unsure looks were exchanged but then Kakashi nodded.

"We'll try to set up something by tomorrow morning. In the meantime, you should get some more rest," Kurenai said before anyone else could speak.

"Sasuke, do you mind helping me out? I really…really need to wash up," asked Sakura, reaching up to pull at a strand of her greasy hair.

"We should send someone else. Poor Sasuke's been stuck with you for over a week," Kakashi suggested. But to everyone's surprise, Sasuke shook his head.

"I don't trust any of these meatheads. I'll take her," Sasuke flatly said. And apparently this was the end of the argument because Sasuke picked her right back up and carried her out of the tent. As they made their way back to the hospital tent, Sakura glanced down at her hand again.

"Meathead?" she repeated.

"Shut up."

After Sakura picked up her bag, they walked to the hot spring. It took a little longer than it should have because Sakura insisted on walking even though her whole body was still very much wobbly and unstable. She half-expected Sasuke to tramp through the snow with her limping along behind him or for him to hover over her with each step she took. Instead, he tossed her bag over his shoulder and continued along at a pace she could keep up with. When they made it to the onsen, Sasuke's eyes flashed red as he stared around before he nodded. As his irises faded back to brown, Sakura stood staring at the steaming water.

"What's wrong?" she heard Sasuke ask from behind her. For a moment, her eyes flickered down to her blotchy arms before she turned to give him a smile.

"Nothing. Turn around, pervert," was her light-hearted response. It was clear from Sasuke's expression that he wasn't satisfied with her reply but he still turned to give her some privacy. As if he anticipated a long wait, he swept snow off a large rock before planting himself on it. Sakura eyed the weary lines of his slouched shoulders and felt a little guilt for his obvious exhaustion. She undressed as quickly as she could. The fabric was mostly sticky with pus and sweat and dried blood and her cheeks flushed when she looked down at her underwear.

She had died for a little bit. Her heart had stopped so she had really been dead. And it was completely natural for muscles to relax upon death. So the small brown stain on her white underwear shouldn't have mattered. It was a natural body process and it really wasn't large enough to be truly horrific. Her eyes darted nervously to Sasuke's back. It was still embarrassing that she had technically shit herself in front of Sasuke though. Stuffing her panties the bottom of her bag, she promised herself that she would burn them when no one was looking.

When she was finally nude, Sakura forced herself to look. The newly-formed skin wasn't just on her arms. She had allowed the toxin to work for long enough that the top layers of her flesh had been damaged severely. From her shoulders all the way down to her toes, there were large blotches of reddish-yellow skin, still shiny and raw. The surface had swelled and ruptured and festered and her healing had managed to close up the top layers enough to prevent infection. She knew that with enough attention, she could heal it perfectly so that almost no scarring remained. And she had spent enough years as a medic to have seen even worse cases than this. Even Kiba's body was worse for wear.

But it was **her** body. Her skin. Her blackened nails and cracked bones.

Once, as a chunin, she had gone out on a short mission with Shizune to gather herbs in the forest. Rooting through thick vines and saplings, they had discovered the decaying body of a merchant who had been robbed and left to die. Somehow, the sight of his bloated figure didn't seem that far off from the ragged patchwork that was now her skin.

Still, Sasuke was tired and Kei was probably worried. Clenching her eyes shut, Sakura stepped into the steaming water. The heat stung at her raw skin so she sunk down slowly until her head was submerged too. She stayed down for as long as she could- until her lungs felt ready to collapse. When her head popped back above water, she sucked in a deep breath of sulfur-filled air. Through the wall of steam, she could see Sasuke still seated on the rock. His chin was propped up in his right fist.

"How shitty do I look right now?"

Her voice was soft but she knew Sasuke had heard because his back suddenly straightened.

"I'm guessing you know the answer already," Sasuke said without turning around.

"Sasuke-kun."

Part of her wondered why she even bothered asking. This was Sasuke. At his silence, she guessed that he had just chosen to ignore her question and she was inwardly a little grateful. But then he let out a long breath- as if he had been holding it for a bit.

"You died, sort of, and came back to life. You're not exactly picture perfect."

The water was too clouded with minerals for her to see her reflection. They were both silent for a moment. Only the sound of more hot water bubbling up from the earth spoke for them. And then, Sakura turned around so she wouldn't even have to look at the back of Sasuke's head.

"I wish you wouldn't have told me the truth," she admitted. Some softer part of her knew that this was Sasuke trying to be gentle, trying to be as soft as he could in his strange, stilted way. That didn't matter though, because anyone else would have lied to her. Naruto would have babbled about how pretty she was and even Kakashi would have softened the blow with some teasing about how she had been too attractive to begin with anyway. Sai would have probably told her the truth but then added something stupid like 'You may be really ugly now but I still like you'. Only Sasuke didn't know how to cushion the blow. He didn't know how to hit her with the hilt of his sword instead of impaling her with the blade. She sunk low in the water, as if to hide herself from the trees too.

It was a while before Sasuke mumbled out an awkward, "Sorry".

"Forget it," she snapped, glad that he couldn't see the tears leaking down her face.

When she was all clean and dressed, Sakura considered walking back to camp without saying anything to Sasuke. And because it was Sasuke, he would probably sit there on that stupid rock and let her go. She stood for a while, just staring at his back while trying to decide what to do. After a couple steps forward through the snow, she lightly touched his left shoulder.

"Let's go," Sakura said in almost a whisper. He stood, still not looking in her direction. It was only when she laced her fingers through his that their gazes met.

"Stupid," she remarked. Only when his mouth twitched, like Sasuke was trying not to smile, did she release his hand and head off. Their feet sunk into the snow together, twin footsteps. It almost sounded like a conversation, the way the cracking and crunching of the ice didn't match up under their weights. Sakura was glad. She wouldn't have known what else to say to him on the way back anyway.

When they set foot back in camp, Sakura headed straight for the hospital tent. Somehow, during the eight days without her, Kei had managed to keep her three patients alive. The necrosis had progressed and all three were now hooked up with breathing tubes, but they were alive nonetheless.

"Kei, you have my blood on ice, right?" asked Sakura as she ducked inside. The girl pointed at the cooler in the corner. Sakura lifted the lid off to find it packed with snow from outside. Inside the icy powder, a glass vial was carefully packed to prolong its life.

"Good. I'm heading back tomorrow and I need it ready for transportation. We're going to need to transport these three too," Sakura informed the girl. Kei's face pinched as she took in the plan.

"Sensei, they're definitely not in any condition to be moved. None of them are even capable of respiring by themselves," Kei protested. These were logical observations and technically the girl wasn't wrong. Sakura shut the cooler and then sat down on top of it.

"That's true. But they'll definitely die if we leave them here. If we work quickly, I might be able to isolate my antibodies fast enough to cure them," Sakura pointed out. Still, Kei, scowling, peeled her gloves off and threw them into the trash.

"That won't work, Sensei. Your original antidote was created using antibodies and it failed to even fully heal this poison when it was still in its trial stages," argued Kei with obvious frustration. Sakura tapped the top of the cooler.

"Yes, but these are **my** antibodies. Don't worry your pretty little head about it," Sakura assured her like she'd done a hundred times before with her other protégées during their training at the hospital. Kei nodded, though her expression was still wary.

If there was electricity at 3, Sakura would have started working on an antidote right away. Unfortunately, there was none. All the radios linking the base camps to each other and to Konoha ran on batteries and the lanterns used for lighting purposes ran on oil. So Sakura spent the rest of the afternoon healing herself until the sun went down. Now that the surface wounds were closed, she focused on mending the microscopic cracks in her bones before they could grow any bigger.

She considered falling asleep in the hospital tent in the one empty bed. Even though Kei had changed the sheets, Sakura felt reluctant about lying down on her former deathbed. She ultimately decided against it and went to find Shino.

"I'm guessing you don't really feel up to using one of those guys' tents, right?" Shino inquired. Sakura thought back to the three lying decaying in the hospital tent. It was true that they definitely wouldn't mind her occupying one of their places just for the night. But it was the same thing that kept her from sleeping on that one open hospital bed. After some hunting, together they found one unused tent from someone who had gone home after his rotation had ended. Konoha had yet to send a replacement for him.

Sakura crawled into the musty tent. Shino had offered to get a lantern for her but she had declined. She brushed some of the dried mud and crushed blades of grass left on the floor before she spread her sleeping bag down. Her entire body stung and ached as she crawled into the bag. But she had used up enough chakra for one day so she sucked it up. Using her cloak as a pillow, she huddled up against the chill outside and closed her eyes. Her abused body was exhausted enough that as soon as her cheek landed on her makeshift pillow, her mind began to drift. Strangely, she didn't slip fully into sleep, though. Instead, she wavered in that strange halfway state between reality and slumber. She was aware of the little noises outside. There were coughs, footsteps, and a few clinks of glass as people cracked open a couple beers. She heard Kurenai conversing in a low voice with Kakashi as they walked past. Someone roared with laughter in the distance. Rather than being annoyed by the noise, Sakura lay sucking up the sounds, letting them become parts of her half-dreams.

It might have been a while before the zipper to her tent creaked open. She wasn't sure about how much time had passed, so much. Any other instance, she would have bolted upright, ready to deal a sharp kick to the drunken idiot stumbling in to disturb her rest. But it had been months since this chakra had been anything but normal to her. She didn't mind that he didn't even ask her permission. Naruto and Sai wouldn't have asked either. She liked that. Barely aware of her own movements, she scooted over to the left to give him room.

There was a heavy thud, probably from him tossing his backpack on the ground. Things shuffled and rustled as he unfurled his sleeping bag and laid it out next to hers. The tent zipped shut and then the sleeping bag zipped open. There were more swishes of fabric rubbing together as he slid into his sleeping bag. The faint smell of soap was in the air.

"Sakura," Sasuke said. He didn't bother to whisper. At the same time, he was quiet, quiet enough that only they would hear each other.

"Hmm?" she hummed.

"You know I'm an idiot…" he began in one of his usual self-deprecating apologies. With a loud sigh, she rolled over so that she was facing him. Heavy eyelids lifting, she stared straight ahead until she could begin to make out the shape of his face in the darkness. He had shaved. Good.

"Shut up," Sakura groaned, her voice slurring.

"I shouldn't have said that before," Sasuke continued in that same solemn tone. Some part of her sleepy brain managed to wonder just how much effort it took the proud Uchiha Sasuke to apologize to her like this. A lazy smile pulled at her mouth that she knew he would be able to see. His eyes were glowing red and she didn't really care why. Maybe he was afraid of the dark. A snorting laugh left her. Sasuke scared of the dark.

"Don't laugh. I'm trying to apologize," he snapped, voice growing edgy. He thought she was laughing at him. Pride. She recognized that in him, the same pride from a long time ago. It almost felt like it was a different life, the days of chasing cats and trying to sneak peeks of Kakashi's face.

"Just shut up, Sasuke," she ordered in more sluggish words. Her mouth stretched in a giant yawn.

Then, after a moment, she snorted again. Even without being able to see very well, she knew Sasuke was staring at her.

She slowly reached over to nudge his arm. "We sound like an old married couple."

This time, it was Sasuke's turn to sigh.

"Go back to sleep, Sakura," he grunted. His sleeping bag rustled and she watched Sasuke turn onto his side, facing away from her. Even half-asleep, she mustered enough energy to smack his back.

"I thought you were apologizing," she teased.

"No."

"Come on, Sasuke," Sakura whined, poking at his shoulder until he rolled back to glare at her.

"I already apologized. Now sleep," he ground out before rolling over again. Letting out a contented sigh, Sakura snuggled deeper into her sleeping bag. It was cozy from her body heat. She let her eyelids slide shut. Gradually, she felt herself slowly drifting back into the soft limbo between worlds.

"Sasuke-kun," she mumbled his name on the edge of sleep.

A grunt.

"You know…you don't really have to apologize anymore."

There was a long pause.

"What?"

"It's okay. Because…because…" Sakura interrupted herself with another yawn, "It's okay because we were too young. We were too selfish…and you were too lost." Then, rolling over too, she pressed her back against his. As she finally drifted off to sleep, where dreams called her in sweet voices, Sakura thought she heard Sasuke say something. She couldn't have been sure and she didn't even remember having heard anything in the morning when she woke.

"Why?"

* * *

><p>A little after dawn, Sakura's eyes snapped open. She stared up at the dark green fabric ceiling, trying to figure out what had jolted her so violently. It took her a second too long to hear a second set of breathing besides her own. Unlike her, Sasuke was pretending to still be asleep. It might have fooled a lot of people, but definitely not her. She had spent enough time at the hospital to known when patients were feigning sleep when she knew they had just been up and about a second before she had entered the room.<p>

Then, Sakura heard a voice.

"I don't know, Hatake-taichou. I heard Uchiha-san went into the same tent last night. I don't want to interrupt anything," Kei said from outside. Rolling her eyes, Sakura flopped onto her back. She let her head loll to the side and found that Sasuke was looking right back at her with the same exasperated stare.

"Trust me, Sasaki-san, it's nothing like that. My team just gets along really well. Isn't that right, Haruno-taichou?" Kakashi responded, calling out to Sakura. The zipper flew open and the weak winter sun rushed in along with frosty air. Pulling her sleeping bag over her head, Sakura groaned.

"Go to hell," she grumbled. She peeked past her arm and saw that Sasuke just lay on his back, glaring upwards as Kakashi poked his head inside.

"And since when have you been our teammate? You're just a stinky old sensei," Sakura added after a moment. A huff of air left Sasuke's nostrils. She suspected that was as close to a laugh as Sasuke was capable of so early in the morning.

"Don't make me drag you out here, Sakura. We're connecting with Konoha in half an hour. You'd better get moving," Kakashi informed her, graciously ignoring her jab. Instead of leaving, Kakashi lingered, his gaze flickering between the two of them.

"And by the way, if anything _is_ going on between you tw-" Kakashi was interrupted by Sakura throwing her cloak in his face. Chuckling softly, he closed the zipper and walked off.

"Stupid Kakashi," Sasuke grunted in a scratchy voice.

"Stupid," she sighed her assent.

Still, Kakashi was right and it really was time to get up. Not bothering to change her clothes, Sakura wriggled out of her sleeping bag. There was soft heat in the middle of her chest. Too tired for modesty, Sakura pulled the front of her shirt down to get a look at the yin seal on her breastbone.

Much like Tsunade, Sakura had chosen a visible shape to help her focus her chakra into it. It was a tiny turquoise square. It nestled just above the front of her bra, barely noticeable against black cotton. Releasing it two days ago meant that all of the energy stored up inside had been released. After the poison had been purged, it had faded into the background, quietly healing up some of the damage to her organs before finally fizzling out just this morning.

She pressed her thumb against the raised shape for a moment. Then, straightening her shirt, Sakura kicked her sleeping bag aside to climb out of the tent. She had slept with her boots on because it did get very cold toward the middle of winter up in northern Fire Country.

"You coming?" she asked, turning to look back at Sasuke. Sakura had shared a tent with Naruto and Kakashi on missions enough that she knew how slovenly they were in the morning. Hair sticking up in all directions and jaws slack, it always took them a bit to come back to life after waking up. But Sasuke was different. His face was sharp with exhaustion, like he hadn't slept at all. Shadows and tight lines were all that made him up. Rubbing his face with his right hand, Sasuke just nodded. It wasn't like Sasuke to roll back over and go to sleep again. But still, years of looking after Naruto and Kakashi had made their mark on her. Sakura zipped the tent shut.

After gargling with mouthwash and rinsing her face with icy drinking water, Sakura knotted her hair on top of her head and headed to the central tent. There were a few people at the radio, twisting dials and muttering to each other. Shino was sitting on the edge of the table while Kakashi sat backwards in a folding chair, his fingers drumming against his thigh. Kurenai stood in the doorway, arms crossed firmly over her chest. Sasuke joined them a few minutes later. When the connection finally went through to Konoha, Kakashi nudged Sakura forward to speak.

There was the usually squawking and ringing from long-distance radios when she held the mouthpiece up in front of her. Sakura tapped the mic a couple times until she heard a familiar voice.

"Hello? Hello? Can you hear me?" Shizune demanded.

"Hi. Is Tsunade-shishou mad at me?" greeted Sakura. There was a loud huff that sputtered through the radio speakers.

"Sakura, you know that radio communications to Konoha should only be sent during times of grave importance. And yes, Tsunade-sama is furious. She's demanding that someone punch Kakashi at least five times for letting you do something so reckless," Shizune sniffed in return. Biting back her smile, Sakura shook her head.

"Okay, listen. I need you to go check on our stocks of Delta-Hachi," Sakura said with urgency coloring her tone. Shizune was quiet for a few seconds.

"Why would you need D-8? Are the casualties really that bad out there?" When Sakura didn't respond, there was a faint clatter. And then keys jangled noisily from the master set of keys for the hospital that Shizune kept hidden in her office.

The hospital had a large collection of drugs created both locally and imported. That room was kept carefully guarded in case of greedy nurses or sneaky thieves looking to score some easy highs. But there was a second storage kept well-concealed from most people. As far as Sakura was aware, the only people who knew of it were Tsunade, Shizune, and herself. This was where the most risky compounds were stored. Even samples from foreign poisons were isolated and stored here in case the need for an antidote ever arose.

Sakura was patient. She knew it would take a bit for Shizune to get from her office on the third floor to the stash hidden away in a secret room not visible even on the hospital schematics. When Shizune picked up the radio a few minutes later, her voice came out in a frantic jumble.

"They're gone! Everything! There's not a single sample left," gasped Shizune.

"Are you sure?" asked Sakura in a tight voice.

"The shelves are bare. I haven't had time to do inventory since…since…" When Shizune trailed off, Sakura squeezed her eyes shut.

"Since the war started," Sakura finished for her.

"Wait. What's Delta-Hachi?" Kurenai inquired. Her calm voice sounded out of place with Shizune still gasping for breath and Sakura's stiff words. Clenching her hands into fists, Sakura sucked in a calming breath. Curious eyes turned to her. Only Kakashi continued staring at the boxy radio.

"Delta-Hachi. We call it D-8 sometimes. It was developed for ANBU about a little over four years ago," Sakura began. When her stare met Kakashi's, she thought she saw something flicker in his steady gaze.

"Anyway, just before the war ANBU started having too many encounters with enemies in our territory. And sometimes there just wasn't time to burn the body or bury it deeply enough to avoid detection…" Sakura drifted off because Kakashi was definitely looking at her strangely now. She raised her eyebrows at him until he let out a heavy sigh. But he shook his head so she understood that it wasn't something pertinent to the current conversation. Nodding a little, Sakura continued speaking.

"So Delta-Hachi was developed. Hachi is sort of a pun we developed at the research lab. Hachi, like the number eight, because there are eight of the deadliest known toxins included in the core structure, and hachi, like bee, because the venom from Fire Bees is in here too," she explained. Kurenai's nose wrinkled.

"Some of you lab guys have twisted senses of humor," Kurenai commented. Sakura shrugged.

"So Delta-Hachi was a poison?" Shino inquired.

"No. We used it to melt corpses," Sakura corrected. It suddenly fell silent in the room. Even the noise of people talking and moving around outside couldn't fill the void.

"Melt?" It was Sasuke that finally spoke again. And though, technically, this was a captain's meeting, no one seemed to mind his presence there.

"We found a combination of chemicals that would speed up the body's natural decomposition while dissolving bones. No one had ever developed something like this before," Shizune piped up. Sakura jumped a little. She had nearly forgotten that Shizune was there on the radio too.

"It was to hide enemy corpses to cover our asses. ANBU loved it. Maybe a little too much," added Kakashi.

"We suspected that maybe some people were starting to abuse its power. It might be used to hide a mistake. A civilian. A rival. Anyway, Tsunade-shishou thought things were starting to get out of hand so we recalled all of the Delta-Hachi and disposed of it. After that, we kept the only remaining samples locked up in storage back at Konoha," Sakura concluded. Kakashi's visible eye narrowed.

"That's all good and well. But how do you know this is precisely your Delta-Hachi? There are reports of similar things being developed in other countries. It might not even be the same compound but just have similar results," Kakashi interjected. At this, a humorless smile curled at Sakura's mouth. When she didn't respond, Shizune let out a drawn-out sigh that crackled the radio.

"Do you know what cyanide is, Kakashi?" asked Shizune rather suddenly.

"It's a poison. It makes people dizzy and vomit before it kills them," answered Kakashi with visible confusion.

"And I'm guessing it's one of the chemicals included in this Delta-Hachi?" Shino surmised. Sakur nodded, crossing her arms tightly over her chest.

"And does anyone know where cyanide is found?" Shizune asked. There was a brief pause and then Kurenai spoke up.

"My mother used to tell me not to eat apple seeds because they had cyanide," she offered.

"That's true. And you're close. The cyanide we extracted is from the pit of a very special type of cherry grown only in the village. We've been cultivating them specifically for toxins and antidotes for a long time now," explained Shizune. When there was more silence, Shizune snickered.

"Cherry. _Cherry_. Cherry blossom," she spelled out for them.

"Sakura," Kakashi sighed.

"I explained before that there are always signatures whenever someone creates a poison. That's mine. Cyanide from the black sakura…" Sakura said in a quiet voice.

"Why is it called that? I've never seen any black cherry blossoms in the village," demanded Kurenai.

"If you prune one of the trees, if you cut off a branch to harvest flowers, the exposed part of the tree turns completely black," Shizune immediately responded.

"It was the first toxin I developed. And the last, now that I think of it," Sakura added, mostly talking to herself. After a moment, she shook her head to clear her thoughts.

"At any rate, the black sakura can't be found anywhere else because it's not found in nature. This is our Delta-Hachi, meaning that someone's stolen all of our samples and has been using it as a base for this poison," explained Sakura.

"By someone, you mean Danzo," Sasuke added.

"All my equipment is at 2 so I'm going to need to get back as soon as possible. And I'm going to need to take the patients with me," she said, leaving little room for argument. Kakashi, however, was an expert at using that little room.

"I thought they were in critical condition. And are you saying that Sasuke will be enough protection for the four of you?" Kakashi demanded in such a sharp voice that Sakura was almost hurt by his mistrust. She stared at him, hard and steady.

"I'll use my summons. And we need to hurry," she almost snapped.

There was a long moment when eyes just flickered around, staring and measuring for a long time.

"We will provide the support you require, Sakura-san," Shino finally responded. He stepped over to extend his arm to her. Sakura grasped his hand and shook it. Even though the new skin stretched across her palm burned, she had to stop herself from grinning like an idiot.

Sakura left the prepping to Kei. She was capable enough to handle unhooking a few IV bags and administering final shots to help boost the faltering immune systems of the men lying silently in their beds. Admittedly, Sakura herself was again hooked up to her own IV because she knew that after days of continual healing, her own body was in desperate need of proper nutrition and rest. Despite this, her stomach still felt like a shriveled knot of pain pounding in the center of her abdomen that ached at the mere thought of food. But she tucked the clear bag into her weapon's pouch and pretended to forget about it while she walked over to the cleared space normally set aside as training grounds.

"Are you going to have enough chakra?" asked Kakashi as he shadowed her steps. Pushing her sleeves up to her elbows, Sakura stared down at her bare hands.

"I hope so," she responded in a barely audible voice. When she glanced back at him, Kakashi took several steps back to give her space. Sakura was aware of the curious eyes as she bit down on her thumb until she could taste metal in her mouth. Cold air washed over the stinging as blood welled up in the indentations from her teeth. Her stiff fingers formed the string of seals almost mechanically. As she slammed her right hand down against the ground, chakra surged through her arm. Black markings poured out of her palm, mixing with the blood and seeping into the hardened soil. Puffs of white smoke exploded into the air, clouding her vision. A few seconds later, the smoke began to clear and the silhouette of a large slug came into view. Wiggling its white eyestalks at her, the slug slowly turned to face her.

"Tamiyo," Sakura greeted.

"Sakura-san. This is rare. You hardly summon me these days," Tamiyo sighed.

"Healing. Summoning uses a lot of chakra," she said and the slug almost looked apologetic.

"Of course. What can I help you with?" inquired Tamiyo.

Sakura had signed the contract to summon slugs later on during her apprenticeship to Tsunade. Though she did have both the skill and permission to summon Tsunade's favored slug, Katsuyu, Sakura knew that Katsuyu was often occupied helping Tsunade at the hospital as well as with administrative tasks in her smaller form. The next largest summons available was Tamiyo, who stood a few heads taller than Sakura. Though she wasn't as experienced as Katsuyu out in the field, she was perfect for the current predicament Sakura found herself in.

"I have three patients in rather delicate conditions. I need you to transport us back to 2," explained Sakura. Tamiyo twisted to look in the direction of the hospital tent that Sakura indicated. The patches of dark red on her back weaved in down in a sinuous pattern. Smaller spots of the same shade twisted up to her head and scattered over her eyestalks.

"Back? Is there someone I'd be able to lock on to as a point of reference?" the slug asked.

"Naruto," Sakura immediately said. Tamiyo let out a little huff.

"Well that should be easy. Just the four?"

"Five," corrected Sakura.

"Five then," Tamiyo amended. She followed Sakura through the camp until they reached the hospital tent where Kei had already begun wheeling the narrow hospital beds outside. Kei handed Sakura the precious vial of blood which was safely stowed away. Despite her sore muscles, Sakura helped Kei lift each person over to Tamiyo who opened her toothless mouth to suck each patient inside. Tamiyo specialized in transporting the injured to safety during battle. She tucked each into her cheeks where they lay cushioned from further harm. When everyone else was in, Sakura looked around until she spotted Sasuke walking up to join her. On his back was his own pack while he held out her backpack to her. He waited for her to slip her arms through the straps before he arched an eyebrow at the large slug.

"How are we supposed to ride this?" Sasuke demanded, eyeing the slug's sleek skin. Not speaking, Sakura held her hand out to him. He only hesitated for a moment before grasping it firmly. She stepped into Tamiyo's open mouth, pulling Sasuke with her. They were enveloped in damp darkness that smelled vaguely of some sort of herbal medicine. Then, without warning, invisible fingers grabbed onto them, their faces and bodies, squeezing tightly before dragging them forward so impossibly fast that their bones rattled painfully. Tumbling over and over, Sakura sucked in a greedy lungful of cold air when Tamiyo spat them out. She heard Sasuke grunt as he sat up, rubbing the elbow that had probably banged against the ground.

"Your slug teleports?" asked Sasuke with a hint of groan. With wobbly knees, Sakura struggled to stand. But her legs buckled and she fell against Tamiyo who nudged her back upright.

"Sort of. She can hook onto a familiar chakra signature and transport to it. But not over very long distances. And she has to rest between most journeys," Sakura said, reaching to lightly pat Tamiyo once in thanks.

"I'm still very young. My mother is much better at all this," Tamiyo chimed in. Her eyestalks drooped a little to emphasize her sadness.

"Katsuyu has been Tsunade-shishou's summons for **decades**. I think you can cut yourself some slack," scolded Sakura. Because it was true that while Tamiyo wasn't perfect, she had been Sakura's personal summons for almost four years and the slug had yet to fail her even in the most trying circumstances. It did take a large amount of chakra to summon her, however, so Sakura often tried to avoid calling for the slug while out in the field.

"Thanks for your hard work. You should go back and rest up now. I'll need you again in a bit," Sakura added. Tamiyo rubbed her eyestalks together as she thought.

"I will. But just one thing before I go," she responded, bending over. Before Sakura could react, Tamiyo opened her mouth. Viscous green liquid dripped onto Sakura, covering her arms and face and saturating her clothing. Steam curled softly into the air, hissing gently in a barely audible sound.

"A present for you, Sakura-san. Good luck," were Tamiyo's parting words before she disappeared in puffs of white.

Sakura was familiar with slug methods of healing. From a young age, the slugs were fed on a strict diet of herbs and medicines. As they grew older, their own bodily secretions were imbued with healing properties. These secretions worked differently than the regular healing chakra generated by a medic. Sakura remembered being fascinated by this process early on during her training. The more powerful secretions did more than heal fresh wounds. Some of them could even eliminate scars and mend bones.

The skin on Sakura's upper arms peeled and quickly pushed to the top. But instead of the raw, blotchy pattern she had seen before, the slug healing smoothed out the rising layers of skin. Though her own work had left her skin burning and itching, there was none of that pain this time around. It felt more like soaking in warm water, letting the heat erase all the little things that added up to discomfort.

"Slugs are freaky," Naruto remarked as he strode up to greet them. On his heels was Sakura's team, just barely managing to keep from shoving the captain aside to get to her first. Not minding the clear layer of ooze coating her, Naruto put his arms around her, letting her sag against him.

"We've seriously got to consider investing in less slimy summons," he joked, wrinkling his nose for emphasis.

"Agreed. Now where's little Prince Panic? We've got some work to do," Sakura said, reaching around to pull the vial of her blood out of her back pouch.

* * *

><p>The next few weeks were chaotic at best.<p>

Tsunade had set her to doing lab work from the beginning of her apprenticeship so Sakura was used to separating blood cells and other related work. They managed to isolate the antibodies her body had generated during her illness. These antibodies were immediately administered to the three shinobi they had brought along from 3 who were teetering so close to the precipice of death that there really wasn't time for a full cure. It bought them enough time to keep working.

Though these antibodies were helpful in fighting off Delta-Hachi, Sakura had designed a nearly perfect compound for destroying flesh. It took several weeks of sleepless nights and days cooped up in a lab to finally start getting results. The whir of the centrifuge was an almost ceaseless noise along with the rumble of the coffee maker. Sakura was sure that Shikamaru wasn't too happy about all the electricity being siphoned off for her but he let her work in peace.

One early morning, nearly a month after returning to camp, Sakura stood at the window watching snow lazily drift down. She held a fresh mug of coffee close to her nose, inhaling the fragrance rather than drinking. The smell of coffee was always better than the taste anyway.

"You're awake? Didn't you go to bed like four hours ago?" Kiba greeted her. He was sitting up in bed, grunting as he did his usual morning stretches. The mismatched spread of his bare upper body looked like a patchwork quilt. According to him, it didn't really hurt anymore and there was just some stiffness when he overexerted himself. Sakura had consulted Shizune and according to the older woman, he needed to continue stretching to encourage elasticity while the flesh was still healing underneath. So Sakura had showed him a few basic exercises and Kiba performed them with enthusiasm. Months of being bedridden with nothing to do had definitely left him open to the idea of doing **anything** even if it was something as basic as moving his fingers in a pattern.

Glancing down at her smooth forearm for a moment, Sakura felt a familiar stab of guilt. After Tamiyo's help, Sakura's skin had knitted together nicely, leaving no trace that she had ever been covered with oozing patches of necrosis. If she could, she would have asked her summons to do the same for Kiba. But she couldn't. The gift of a slug's healing was a sacred thing and to be given it was considered one of the highest honors. Kiba insisted that he didn't mind, that his scars would make him seem even more manly so she shouldn't worry. But every once in a while, she couldn't help but feel more than a little sorry.

"Four's plenty," Sakura said with a light shrug. She hadn't bothered with her regulation attire today. A big grey sweater and black leggings were infinitely more comfortable and it wasn't like anyone was going to burst into the clinic to waggle their finger at her cotton-wool blend. The centrifuge beeped a couple times before the machine started up and began spinning in the opposite direction.

"Whatever you say. I'm off to take a leak," sighed Kiba. Sakura just hummed her approval as she turned back to her work. She still listened carefully as he jammed his feet into his shoes. Nerve reconnection was still incomplete so his steps faltered just a little. But she knew she couldn't offer assistance for something like walking to the bathroom without hurting his pride. That wasn't her knowledge as a doctor talking. It was just because she knew Kiba.

Kiba pulled himself up to his feet with a strained groan. He shuffled across the floor behind her, pausing just by where the door would be.

"Oh and Merry Christmas, Sakura," he added before stepping outside into the cold. As chilly air gusted into the cabin before being shut out by the door, Sakura blinked a couple times.

"Christmas?" she repeated.

But it was true. Time had passed much more quickly than she had realized and the holiday season had crept up upon her. Her attention drifted from her work to the window once again. She had taken down the linen curtains after she and Naruto had agreed that they were hideous and that she should never try to sew again.

"As long as you're good at sewing up people, that stuff doesn't matter," Naruto chortled, "Just find a nice little househusband who can instead."

When Takumi roused himself from underneath the pile of scrolls he had fallen asleep in, Sakura gave him the day off. The boy wished her "Merry Christmas" before running off to spend the day with his friends. It was strange. A couple years back, he had been stuck to her side. If she had given him a day off, he would have spent his day studying next to her instead of leaving. But, Sakura observed with a strange sense of pride, that this side of Takumi wasn't bad either.

Since they were still technically on alert, holiday festivities were left to opening up a couple beers at sundown. Sakura holed herself up in the clinic, trying to test out the best countermeasure to a certain cluster of toxins she had been struggling with for the better part of the week. She only stopped working when she realized that her hands were shaking too hard to hold a vial steady. She had forgotten to eat all day again.

With a little sigh of impatience, Sakura yanked her cloak on and stepped into the cold to rustle up something to eat. The designated dinner time had ended long before but she helped herself to cold rice and dried fish someone had thought to set aside for her. Probably Konohamaru. She sat in the darkened mess hall, quietly munching through her simple meal before washing her bowl and setting them in the big plastic tub to dry along with the others. When she walked outside again, she spotted Tamiyo lounging lazily by one of the campfires near the clinic.

Since there were no other animals around, Tamiyo had offered herself up as a source for antibodies. So Sakura injected small patches of her flesh with diluted amounts of the modified Delta-Hachi. They waited for the poison to work and for Tamiyo's immune system to combat it before they harvested the blood around the injection site. It was a tiring process and Sakura had suggested contacting a nearby village to purchase a horse or maybe even a cow. But Tamiyo insisted and so she had spent the better part of the month weaving in and out of their world and her home.

Sakura heard a familiar voice and turned her head in time to see Naruto stepping out of the central tent. Members of his own team met him and they walked off together. Even Shikamaru seemed more relaxed, sitting around a fire, listening to his underlings talk instead of poring over maps and strategies until it looked like his head might explode.

It took an instant. Because amidst all the chaos and laughter, there was one source of quiet. Well, really, it wasn't that he was the **only** source. But it was Sasuke. So it felt like he was. Sasuke.

He sat toward the edge of camp, by a smaller campfire. Sakura reached out toward him with her chakra, tickling at the edge of his signature with her own. Very slowly, he lifted his head, looking in her direction. And even though she should have been too far away in the darkness to see, his irises lit up red and he nodded his acknowledgement at her. She strode over to him, hunching her shoulders against the cold.

"By yourself again?" she greeted him with a little smile.

"Finally. Some guys were over here until a little while ago. They were complaining about missing their girlfriends," Sasuke grumbled almost under his breath. He picked up a long twig and prodded at the dark orange coals glowing beneath the flames.

"Don't be jealous, Sasuke-kun. I'm sure there's one lonely lady willing up to open herself up to your icy talons," Sakura teased, making her fingers into claws. Sasuke glared up at her.

"Sakura."

"Not sorry," she said as she settled down next to him on the flat rock. She tucked her knees up to her chest before pulling her cloak tighter around herself. Faint curls of smoke rose into the air before stretching and disappearing into the cool winter wind. He poked at the fire one more time before tossing the stick aside.

"Do you want to know something stupid about me?" Sakura suddenly inquired. Sasuke cast her a strange look before his expression smoothed out again.

"Sure."

"I missed you," were the words she replied with.

"I already knew that," he grunted even though she could see that he was at least a little surprised. Digging the toe of his boot into the frozen dirt and snow, he didn't look at her.

"No. Not from then…not because you left," she sighed. At this, he finally raised his head. His eyes swept over her face searchingly. She could see the faint signs of confusion- a line above his eyebrow, the downward curl of his mouth. Clasping her hands in front of her, she tried her best not to laugh at just how ridiculous she was going to sound. But at this point, she was so sleep-deprived that she really couldn't be bothered to care.

"I missed you. We missed you. We didn't get the point of you so we missed that chance to do something for you. I just… I don't know. Don't you think that if maybe we'd understood you that maybe something could have been done? Maybe you wouldn't have left at all…" she drifted off when his face suddenly grew sharp.

"No," he firmly said.

"No?" she repeated just a little sadly.

"No. Because then I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't be me," he concluded with absolute conviction. A soft smile tugging at her lips, she reached over to hook her pinkie with his thumb. He didn't shy away from the contact. He just looked down at their hands with mild interest before looking back up at her face.

"Really? Who would you be then?" she inquired. In a movement that was so unlike him, he lifted his left shoulder in a slight shrug.

"Someone. Some guy. Just not me."

They watched each other for a long time before Sasuke's mouth lifted in a tremulous smile that disappeared as quickly as it had appeared.

"You're weird, Sakura. What kind of person asks strange questions like this?" he snorted. Releasing his hand, Sakura laughed lightly.

"Merry Christmas, Sasuke-kun."

He clasped her hand in a firm handshake. She could feel the bump of his callouses from handling his sword for many years.

"Merry Christmas," he replied.

And Uchiha Sasuke was smiling again.

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading. I'd really appreciate some reviews for encouragement so I'll hopefully be able to get over this mental block quickly and get back to writing.<p> 


	7. Witch Hazel

Hi, everyone. It's been a while since I've posted anything on this website. Hopefully I'll find time to write some more this break between my job and summer classes. Hope everyone else is enjoying themselves too.

Enjoy this chapter!

* * *

><p>"Cheers!" everyone yelled as they smacked their glasses together. Beer sloshed out over the tops, foaming up and dribbling between their fingers. Tipping their heads back, they gulped down the frothy drink, choking on their own laughter.<p>

"Congratulations, Naruto. I thought I'd be stuck with a Genin on my team forever," Sakura teased as she poked her finger into his tanned cheek. Lips pulling up into a grin, Naruto threw his arm over her shoulders and squeezed her so hard that she nearly toppled out of her seat.

"I couldn't have done it without you and Sai kicking my ass every morning, Sakura-chan!" he responded cheerfully. Sai lifted his cup toward Naruto in response before taking another long swig just as they had taught him to do at parties. Naruto released her and ran off to talk to his other friends packed at the bar. Practically everyone they knew had come down to celebrate Naruto's accomplishment. As she watched a drunk Rock Lee tackle Naruto in a hug, Sakura laughed.

"You are ridiculously happy right now," observed Sai from next to her. Sakura turned to him with an alcohol-softened smile.

"Yeah," she agreed.

"Why? We're not celebrating your success," he inquired. Sakura tapped her fingers against the sides of her cup with her short nails as she thought.

"Because when you love someone, their happiness is just as important as your own." With those words, Naruto came running back to fling himself onto her in another big hug. Sighing and rolling her eyes, Sakura pulled him upright and then flashed Sai an exasperated expression. And Sai lifted his cup to her and took another sip of beer.

Entropy

Chapter 7: Witch Hazel

Sakura woke to the sound of Sasuke's sharp sigh directly above her. Head jerking up, she looked blearily around the darkened clinic until she saw him standing directly in front of her desk. She sluggishly ripped the paper stuck to her cheek off and slapped it back down on top of the pile.

"I thought you were dead," Sasuke remarked.

"Shut up," she grumped out in response. Blearily running her fingers through her hair, she looked around the room until Takumi ran to her with a cup off lukewarm coffee.

"Sorry, Sensei. I'll get a fresh pot on," said Takumi even as he handed the mug off to her. Sakura managed to grab onto the back of his shirt to stop him.

"No, it's fine. This is exactly what I need," Sakura sighed. She took a big gulp of the drink and inhaled deeply through her nose. Ignoring the continued pressure of Sasuke's gaze on her face, she slowly reached up to wipe away the thin line of drool trailing from the left corner of her mouth down to her chin. Lips twisting into a scowl, she gulped down the rest of the coffee and then leaned back far in her chair to stretch her back. The centrifuge hummed on in the background as she stared down at her empty cup. Even though she had assured her apprentice that cooled coffee was fine, she heard the coffee maker buzz in the back corner as Takumi brewed up a fresh batch. She glanced up at Sasuke again.

"I got a solid hour of sleep in. We're just waiting for the centrifuge to finish up the next cycle," she told him without being asked.

"More antivenin?" inquired Sasuke. As he spoke, he lowered himself into Takumi's empty chair next to hers. They had shoved their two desks together to create a sort of workbench in the back of the clinic. The far corner where her desk had previously sat was now cluttered with stacks of books underneath piles of notes.

"Yeah. Breaking up the Delta-Hachi with chakra takes too much time and any antidotes we've been working on are still falling flat," Sakura informed him with a sigh. Her head lolled back. With her arms draped over the rests of the spinning chair, she sank down and wondered how she hadn't had a mental breakdown after so few hours of sleep for weeks upon weeks. As she sat up straight again, Sakura stared down at the pile of papers she had been sleeping on top of. Mapping out protein chains by hand wasn't exactly the simplest task but she knew she had to analyze the chemical bonds before trying to implement any real cure. She knew the structure of Delta-Hachi well but this version had been watered down and tampered with enough to perplex her. Those researchers at Oto and Root obviously weren't half-wits.

It had been just over three months since she had injected herself with a sample of the toxin and nearly died in the damp canvas tent that already reeked of death. Since then, with Tamiyo's help, Sakura had managed to create a relatively successfully antivenin. As long as a large portion of the poison was manually extracted and the antivenin administered within the first 24 hours, patients all seemed to recover rather quickly. Sometimes Sakura looked down at her hands and thought she saw the raw, shiny patches of regrown skin from her experience. Tamiyo's secretion had virtually eliminated all of the scarring except for one small spot on the palm of her right hand. She had pooled her chakra there to make it unable to heal. That, along with the mark on her stomach and back were things she needed, she had decided long ago. Maybe it was some sort of veiled arrogance, but she felt like if she didn't have those physical scars to look at from time to time, that maybe it would be that much harder to get through those unbearably long days with the weight of pretty much the entire village from sinking her into the ground.

Sakura could tell that the small scar bothered Sasuke, though. He didn't say anything about it. But she could feel his eyes following it sometimes as he watched her work and she found it somewhat unsettling and sweet all at once. It was jagged, spreading from her pinky down to her wrist in a thin patch of dark pink.

"Don't you have anything better to be doing than bothering me, Sasuke-kun?" inquired Sakura. As she watched, Sasuke looped around to sit in Takumi's unoccupied chair. The boy was busy sorting samples and cataloging them so he didn't seem to mind his seat being taken. Still sunk low in her seat, Sakura cast Sasuke a smug look.

"I just got back from a quick scout. Everything's been looking pretty clear lately," Sasuke told her while completely sidestepping her teasing. The smile fell from her face. Tapping her bare feet against the worn floors, Sakura lolled her head this way and that.

"I know this is the best strategy but I just don't like the idea of herding everyone together. It makes us too vulnerable," she remarked. Of course this was a concern she had openly voiced and Shikamaru seemed to agree but they really didn't have any better plans. As another sigh erupted out of her, Sakura spun her chair around once. As if sensing her building anxiety, Sasuke came to visit her often. It was chivalrous- for Sasuke, anyway.

"Get some sleep, Sakura. You look like a panda," Sasuke told her.

So much for chivalry.

"This centrifuge only has a couple minutes left and then I've got to get to work before the sample coagulates," she told him a little snippily.

"You're not looking so hot yourself, Sasuke. Why don't you go rest? Nothing's going to be happening until dawn anyway," Sakura added as a suggestion. From the look that flashed across his face, Sasuke seemed ready to agree until the door creaked open and Naruto stepped inside. Rubbing at the back of his head as he strode over and then collapsed face-down on one of the open beds without greeting either of them. Sakura and Sasuke exchanged looks.

This was not the respectable Uzumaki-taichou lauded by his comrades. This was not the man to become the next Hokage. This was just plain Naruto, 24, tired. He rarely had time to relax so Sakura didn't mind letting him come vent to her every once in a while. It wasn't like Takumi was going to gossip about the things he overheard anyway.

"Heard you nearly fell asleep in your dinner today," remarked Sakura with a smile. Takumi's gaze briefly met hers and he quickly turned away to his work to hide his matching grin. It was obvious that Takumi served as her eyes and ears around the base these days- especially since she rarely had time to do anything other than work. Whatever Takumi saw, there was a large chance that it would eventually get back to Captain Haruno.

"Do you miss home, Sakura?"

Naruto's question caught her off guard. Sakura looked back to him and found that Naruto had rolled onto his side to face her. His blue eyes were droopy with exhaustion but still bright. And the answer didn't come quickly to her. She had honestly been so caught up in being busy that there had been little room in her head for feelings. But as she considered, a deep longing rose in the pit of her stomach. With a sigh, she tucked her palm under her cheek.

"My mom's shiruko," she admitted. Her eyes glazed over as she imagined the sweet red bean soup with globs of soft mochi floating around. Naruto let out a groan.

"Real ramen from Ichiraku."

"Pork buns from that stand across the street from Jounin HQ," added Sakura.

"Hot taiyaki."

"My mom's shrimp tempura," Sakura sighed wistfully. At this, Naruto's eyes rolled back as he remembered the crispy salty and sweet taste of her mother's cooking. He had been over for dinner a few times when she was still living with her parents and she had never seen Naruto enjoy eating something other than ramen as much as he had her mother's cooking.

"What about you, Sasuke? Aren't you tired of eating nothing but all these soldier's rations and rehydrated crap?" Naruto demanded.

There was a soft pause and Sakura carefully turned her chair just a little so she could see Sasuke's expression. For an instant, she wondered if they had struck the wrong chord. Because the word "home" for Sasuke surely meant something different for him. The walls of the village couldn't possibly hold the same feelings that they did for them. Thinking deeper, it struck Sakura that maybe Sasuke didn't have a real home. The same thing seemed to have occurred to Naruto because for an awful instant, they stared at each other with panic simmering just below the surface.

"That pork cutlet Sakura made and burnt the hell out of when we were Genin," Sasuke finally uttered. Naruto's face pinched as he thought. Sakura didn't need to think that hard. She knew immediately what he was referring to. Turning bright pink, she shoved his leg with her foot.

"We were 12!" she exclaimed while turning slightly red. In a fit of absolute stupidity, she had bragged about her cooking skills one day and practically dragged the boys over for dinner. Just as Sasuke said, she had burnt the pork cutlets terribly. Sitting on the plate, roasted to a horrific shade of dark brown, they had mocked her. Still, Naruto had bravely gobbled his down and even Sasuke had eaten his portion without complaint.

"Ah! I remember! That was surprisingly good!" Naruto chimed in with a grin.

"Shut up, Naruto. They were awful," sighed Sakura. Sinking down even lower in her chair, she angled her head to the side to look at Sasuke.

"The presentation was off-putting but the taste was fine," Sasuke said. His expression was surprisingly serious as he looked over at her.

"I want to eat it again," he added.

"Me too! I guess we'll have to go around eating for a week or two once we get home. There's this place that sells takoyaki that opened up near the library that you've **got** to try, Sasuke," Naruto said brightly.

They pretended that weighing the pros and cons of different flavors of ice cream really mattered right then. They acted like once the sun rose over the horizon that things wouldn't change forever. Gaze flickering back and forth between two of the people she trusted most in the world, Sakura memorized the easy smirks, the loose postures, and hoped that there would be a time when all of this was just another memory soaked in nostalgia.

It was in Naruto's smile, lingering at the corners of Sasuke's gaze- the pervasive fear that soon, this tightly-knit group, this team patched together with tape and their sheer stubborn will would crumble apart again. The love for these two overflowed in Sakura's chest until it ached to the point of bursting.

She knew there was a big chance that at least one of them was going home in a body bag.

* * *

><p>Isami Shigehito brought Ino over by dawn. They had journeyed throughout the night and Ino, slightly out of shape from years of being cooped up in the hospital, arrived a little winded. Sakura took one look at her and had someone set her up in one of the vacant tents for a full eight hours of sleep. Any less than that, Sakura warned her, and she would knock her out and force her to get some rest. The rest of the team scattered to find places to set up their own tents or to reunite with old comrades. Shigehito lingered in front of the clinic, eyes eagerly drinking in everything around him.<p>

"Let me look at that back for you, Isa-senpai," Sakura called out. She watched Shigehito turn to regard her. Arms hanging out the window and chin resting on the sill, she waggled her fingers at him. She had spotted his discomfort from the moment he had walked into camp. With a resigned sigh, he stepped inside with his hands on his hips.

"That eye of yours is ridiculous. I think I pulled something a couple days back," he admitted while stopping in front of her. Eyebrows rising, he leaned over to examine her face.

"Speaking of your eyes… were they always blue, Haruno?" asked Shigehito. Sakura pushed him away by the forehead, acutely aware of the stare drilling between her shoulders as she did so. He seemed to feel it too because he leaned slightly to the side to see Sasuke sitting on the edge of Sakura's desk. There was her old medical journal opened in his lap.

"No. I sort of had to… regrow them," replied Sakura. She shrugged nonchalantly and so Shigehito did the same. They were darker than the icy shade of powder blue from that time three months ago. It would probably take another few months for them to revert back to their normal color.

"Cool. So… back."

Not exactly appreciating his tone, Sakura jabbed him hard in the muscles with chakra-infused punches. Though it did the job and relieved the strain, she knew that the pain from the impacts would linger for a bit. With a proud smirk, she tilted her head to one side.

"If you weren't so cute, _Kohai_*, I'd kick your ass," Shigehito grumbled. He rubbed sulkily at his left shoulder.

"If you weren't so old, _Senpai_, you might be able to," she teased right back. More chakra pooled to her right hand as she ran it lightly down his back. The tension slid off of him as did a loud sigh. Sakura heard a beep so she turned around.

"What color is it?" asked Sakura. Sasuke looked down at the centrifuge next to his hand for a moment.

"The light's green," he observed before flipping to a new page.

"Good," she said. Sweeping past Shigehito, she continued to mutter "goodgoodgood" over and over again. Running her hands through her hair, she moved quickly around the clinic, grabbing books and equipment seemingly at random. Takumi's head perked up and he immediately ran over to help. She pushed things into his hands and he scuttled around balancing things while Shigehito moved over to Sasuke.

"So you're Uchiha Sasuke. I'm Isami Shigehito," Shigehito greeted him with an easy smile. Sasuke was quiet but then he reached out to grudgingly shake the other man's hand.

"I'm guessing either you're her indentured servant or aiming for that," Shigehito commented. He gestured toward Sakura's shapely rear as she bent over to get a beaker from a low shelf. Takumi stood next to her, reaching up on his tiptoes to dig for something too. Sasuke's eyes narrowed in on Sakura before they flickered back to the captain. His face darkened into a scowl that Shigehito quickly picked up on.

"She's my teammate," the Uchiha ground out. The smile dropped quickly from Shigehito's face. He awkwardly lowered his finger and this arm entirely. Instead he shoved his right hand into his pocket and cleared his throat. Sasuke slowly averted his eyes back to Sakura who was now speaking to her apprentice slowly and carefully, probably about the procedure they were about to follow.

"Oh. So you were with her and Uzumaki when you were kids? I mean, probably not for long since you left…" Shigehito trailed off. Eyes still watching Sakura, Sasuke nodded.

"Sorry, man. I wasn't trying to be rude. Haruno's a great shinobi and I respect her. It's just that some of us have been out here for almost four years and she's one of the prettiest things we get to see," Shigehito added in a low voice that wouldn't travel. This appeared to do little to mollify Sasuke who finally tore his stare from Sakura. Instead he fixed Shigehito with a piercing stare.

"You've got Ino and Tenten. That Sasaki girl's around too," he shot back. Shigehito snorted.

"Listen, Tenten's engaged. So is Yamanaka. And if I lay a hand on Kei-chan, I know Haruno would break my neck… among other things. That's the way it's always been," sighed Shigehito with a hint of tragedy.

"I did hear Haruno had something going on with someone but that's probably just rumors," he continued on. At this, Sasuke shot him a look.

"Rumors?"

"Yeah. Like she stopped showing her face at bars and her usual hangouts when she was back home. Then again, she's probably too busy at the hospital to deal with any of that."

Right hand clenching behind his back, Sasuke stared down at her meticulous journal. The sharp and thin loops of her handwriting danced across the paper. At times, they grew sloppy, like she was scrawling as she moved.

"But that's Haruno's business. I like to talk but I sure as hell won't stick my nose where it doesn't belong," Shigehito stated firmly. His impression of the man improved at this. Sasuke lifted his face to observe him again.

"I mean, unless I'm asked to do some poking," added Shigehito on a surprisingly light note. He flashed another smile as Sakura approached. She peeled her gloves off with two loud smacks and dropped them on the desk next to Sasuke. Takumi stood in the background carefully sucking liquid up into a tall pipette.

"Is Isa-senpai bothering you? I'm kicking him out so don't worry," said Sakura putting her left hand on her hip. She caught the tail end of Sasuke's tense look but didn't comment on it.

"Just having a chat between guys. No need to get strict, Haruno. If you're too stodgy, guys won't like you," teased Shigehito. Sakura rolled her eyes at Sasuke.

"Oh and I won't be able to live without a burly man to protect my frail existence," she replied in a flat voice. At this, Sasuke smirked. Their eyes met and Sakura let a smile creep up on her face too.

"Anyway, I don't need you chattering away in here like a gossiping housewife. Out," she ordered. Her hands flapped in a shooing gesture. Putting on a wounded expression, Shigehito pointed at a rather smug-looking Sasuke.

"He gets to stay? That's unfair," he complained half-seriously. Patting Sasuke's arm, Sakura smiled impishly.

"Sasuke is quiet. And he doesn't interrupt my work or stare at my ass," she responded with a stern look. Suddenly in a hurry, Shigehito briskly walked off to go "talk strategy with Nara". Sakura shook her head. When she let out a sigh, Sasuke moved his arm a little to get her attention. He lifted his chin in the direction of the departed shinobi with a click of his tongue. Obvious disapproval. Of course someone as bombastic and light-hearted would rub Sasuke the wrong way.

"He's a handful but he's a good guy. He's the one that taught me how to use a sword back when I first joined ANBU," she assured Sasuke who just gave a resigned nod. There was a slight lull in the conversation. She was still leaning on his arm.

"For the record, you don't look at my ass, right?" inquired Sakura. It was Sasuke's turn to give her a look.

"Do I look like I want to die?" Sasuke asked in return. A laugh burst from Sakura. She turned to get back to her work while Sasuke went back to skimming through the years of Sakura's life condensed in her thick journal.

Over the next two weeks, all of the shinobi at the border consolidated into one group. They arrived under the cover of the night, undergoing questioning and examination upon arrival to make sure that they weren't imposters. Sakura was suddenly inundated with all the medical files of over 60 new people and she was tempted on more than one occasion to shove them all into a fire. Somehow she always managed to gather the resolve to slog through them until she had all of them memorized too.

Luckily, Kiba had recovered enough to move out of the clinic and into his tent. He showed up for additional therapy and healings once a day in the morning. His flexibility was improving every day and his sensitivity was getting better too. After a while, Sakura signed off on his files and he rejoined Naruto's team to warm welcome. Sasuke's role in helping recover Kiba seemed to have cemented his spot in the team too. Takumi reported that he always saw Sasuke eat with his team in the cafeteria whenever he popped in to grab food for him and Sakura. She ate standing at her desk but the news was enough to bring a smile to her tired face.

Accommodating the flood of arrivals in the camp was a challenge. With some jostling and squeezing, they set up enough tents to fit everyone. Anyone sleeping in the vicinity of a snorer had to suffer through the night as there was no longer room to move away. Still, it was better than sleeping in the trees so no one really complained. A secondary medical tent was set up behind the cafeteria for emergency treatment. Ino was put in charge of this along with Kei. The two headstrong medics often butted heads but seemed to make things function efficiently while Sakura continued to research with Takumi. Ino's two assistants had been sent home. The shortage of staff at the hospital had thrown things into chaos and they needed all the help they could get.

"I don't see why you put me with **that person**, Sensei. I heard she decided to become a medic because she wanted to prove that she was better than you. Normally you'd break someone's teeth for that," Kei bluntly stated one day as she helped Sakura take blood samples from Tamiyo. The slug let out a giggle despite the pain of the long syringe in her side. Rubbing the slug's damp skin soothingly, Sakura tried not to smile too. They had tasked Takumi with running the centrifuge by himself for a while. Sakura needed to get out of the clinic every once in a while and to be honest, she had missed Kei.

Her first year running the hospital on her own, Sakura had implemented a change to the training program for medics. Out of the top students who passed the exam that winter, Sakura had hand-picked a group of three students as her own. Among them, Kei had gone on to specialize in internal medicine, assisting both Tsunade and herself in surgery several times. Takumi had gone on to focus on research before he had gotten on his knees to beg her to become her apprentice. The situation had made her think of how she had gone to Tsunade to ask the same thing. From then on, she had begun training Takumi in combat too. And the last member of the group, a girl named Ginkaku Nozomi had gone to focus in poisons. She was still in Konoha, working back at the hospital.

These three had flourished beautifully, finding their own talents and enduring brutal training. Sakura had not only picked up some love of drinking from her teacher. She wasn't a lenient teacher and several students had asked to learn under her only to give up after a few days.

It always surprised her how much her students cared for her even after all the abuse she put them through. They were fiercely defensive of her too. Even though timid Takumi usually had no voice, the second anyone shot her a lecherous look, his hand sharpened into a blade. Even when Isami had commented on her butt back at the clinic, Takumi's head had risen sharply, his hand clenching into a fist. She had pacified his anger with a pinch to his cheek. Sakura had gotten used to those comments during her time at the border and she had learned not to take offense. Or at least to let the frustration build until she had to punch one of the lechers in the face.

"I know how you feel, Kei, but Ino is still your senpai," Sakura gently reminded her. Kei let out a huff of frustration but stayed quiet. They stood calmly swapping out the filled vial for another one. The dark blood dripped steadily into the container.

"She can be a blockhead and she'll never admit she's ever wrong until the day she dies but she's still your ally and she's also my friend. I need you to be patient with her. Besides, you can always remember that you have better security clearance than her," she added with a devious expression. This seemed to cheer Kei up. She pushed a stray lock of brown hair out of her face with a tentative smile. They watched the vial fill up before they capped it and pulled the syringe out altogether. Sakura lightly touched the hole with her pointer finger and channeled a little chakra there. With the prick mark all sealed up, Sakura patted Tamiyo again.

"Thanks again. You should go get some rest," she said. Tamiyo's head tilted slightly to one side.

"Don't over-exert yourself, Haruno-san," answered the summons with equal concern. With a nod, the slug disappeared in a puff of smoke. Kei gathered the vials of blood in her hands.

"I'll deliver these to Takumi-kun. Do you need anything else?" Kei said as she took a step toward the clinic. Rubbing at the back of her neck, Sakura shook her head.

"You and Takumi take a break. Get some food in you and some sleep," she instructed.

"But the samples?" Kei inquired.

"Keep them in the fridge. A couple hours of rest won't hurt anyone. I need you two sharp in case anything happens," Sakura insisted. Kei only hesitated for another few moments before she half-ran to the clinic with the vials held to her chest. Sakura wiped her hands on her thighs as she walked. The slime from Tamiyo didn't bother her but leaving it all over doorknobs and anything else she touched tended to gross other people out.

Sakura ducked into the central tent to find Kurenai and Shikamaru chatting. The two had gotten close after Asuma's death and she knew Shikamaru had played a big role in helping to raise Kurenai's son. Kakashi and Tenten sat at the table with a large map spread between them. They were deep in conversation as they moved markers around and made lines on the map in colored ink. Shino nodded in greeting. He sat with Kakashi and Tenten but seemed to be observing more than contributing.

"You're keeping busy, I see," Sakura commented as she noticed the small black bug perched on Shino's finger. A couple more hovered near him but they didn't bother her so she didn't pay them any mind.

"I'm having them run circuits around the forest. It feels too quiet," he replied.

"Are your bugs affected by the Delta-Hachi?" Sakura suddenly asked. The only reason she knew she had startled Shino was that his dark eyebrows rose over his sunglasses.

"Yes. Even brief contact on the feet and wings results in death," responded Shino. Nodding, Sakura stored that tidbit away for later.

"How's Kiba doing?" It was Shino's turn to ask a question. Of course he would be concerned about his teammate's health. While she had dated him, KIba had admitted that Shino was his best friend despite how different they were. Though she had never really been close to Shino, she always figured that if Kiba trusted him, he had to be a good guy.

"I think other than the scarring, he's doing really well. He still has some numbness and tingling in the places that were most-damaged. I honestly didn't expect him to recover so quickly," Sakura informed him with an incredulous shake of her head.

"Kiba's always managed to pull through with sheer hard-headedness. I imagine this time is no different," Shino commented. Sakura cracked a smile and she was certain that Shino did too. Exchanging a few more words with the others, Sakura left the tent, sucking in cool, sweet air after the smell of smoke that lingered inside even when Shikamaru wasn't smoking. She found Naruto and Sasuke a little ways off, sitting around a fire with half of the team along with the two other captains. A couple of the boys saw her and scooted over to make room for her. Letting out a heavy sigh, Sakura plopped down onto the log between Naruto and Sasuke. Sasuke handed her the cup in his hand and she drank without asking what it was.

Lukewarm tea. At least it was caffeine.

"Why're you outside? I thought you'd burn up in the sun," remarked Naruto. She punched him in the arm hard enough to make him wince. But they still relaxed back into their easy smiles. Sakura never got mad at him. Not really.

"It seems Haruno's been working her ass off. Have you made any progress?" Shigehito chimed in with a sly look. Beside him, Neji stared but didn't speak.

"Well, we accidentally discovered a compound that'll freeze the blood in your veins. But other than that, all we've managed to do was make the antivenin work a little more quickly," she responded a little glumly.

"You make it sound like those aren't two really good things, Sakura-chan. Give yourself a break," Naruto scolded her with a light shove against her shoulder. Sakura scowled at him.

"Naruto, this is like you went to get ramen and you found some rice and dumplings. It's nice but not exactly what you were looking for," she threw back at him. Understanding lit up Naruto's eyes while his team stifled snorts. Of course a ramen analogy would get through to Naruto. Nothing less. Dissolving into a smile, Sakura knocked her shoulder into his. Her head perked up when she felt Kei's chakra signature drawing closer. Not feeling like turning around, Sakura leaned back until she could see the top of Kei's brown bun.

"Sensei, when you developed Delta-Hachi, did you by any chance use your own blood?" Kei asked. When Sakura nearly lost balance, she thought she heard Sasuke let out a sigh before he and Naruto each grasped her wrists to stop her from toppling over. Held in place like some overgrown puppet, Sakura didn't really mind the odd posing as she thought. Then again, she was so sleep-deprived that the notions of embarrassment or basic manners were lost to her.

"That practice was banned about eight years ago by Tsunade-shishou, so no. Why?" Sakura said in return. The words seemed to light up something in Kei. All of a sudden, her measured words spilled out in a torrent of excitement.

"We've identified some organic matter and we think that might be what's altering the chemistry so drastically. If it's keyed to a certain bloodline limit or blood type-" Sakura's eyes widened. Before Kei had even finished speaking, she braced a palm each against Naruto and Sasuke's shoulders to do a backflip out of her seat. The new information sang through her brain, completely changing all the figures rattling around inside. A strange clarity swept through her foggy head. Suddenly compounds clicked together and the numbers for equations meshed together.

As soon as her feet hit the ground, Sakura was briskly striding toward the clinic. With her hands yanking her hair into a messy knot on top of her head, Sakura's eyes narrowed.

"Haruno?" Shigehito called after her.

"Don't bother," it was Sasuke that spoke, "She can't hear you. She can't hear anyone when she gets like that."

The door to the clinic slammed shut behind her with a bewildered Kei locked outside. Takumi, on his way back from the cafeteria with a plate in his hands, stopped right next to her. He chewed slowly as he looked at the door and then at Kei.

"Did we get kicked out?" he queried.

"Yeah," Kei sighed in response. Takumi looked at his food and then at the door again.

"But Sensei never remembers to eat. I hope she'll be alright," muttered Takumi.

It was only after sunset that the lock to the clinic slowly snapped open. When the door opened up a crack, Takumi bounded inside armed with bowls of food held in front of him. Kei followed a little more cautiously, her expression wary.

Sakura sat on the edge of a bed. Smoke curled up slightly from the tall beaker sitting on the floor by her feet. Eyes unfocused, she shook her head when Takumi held the food up in front of her. However, she did accept the water and gulped it down eagerly. Kei crouched down to stare at the contents of the beaker from a safe distance. Quick flaps of her hand wafted the smoke toward her face.

"It's AB-," she told them.

"It's AB- blood?" asked Takumi with clear confusion. A puzzled look came from Kei too. Naruto poked his head into the clinic. He had learned from experience not to barge in when Sakura was deep in her work. A couple long-lasting bruises and verbal lashings were things he had learned to avoid this way. Deeming it safe, he walked in to stand directly in front of Sakura.

"It's rare anywhere but only .1% of Asians are AB-. What's more, there's something… wrong with the genome. There's an extra antigen present," Sakura explained before taking another sip of water.

"Antigens are the defense systems in blood. They attack things that aren't supposed to be there. That's why you can only receive blood from certain types," added Kei for Naruto's benefit.

"But if there's an extra, what does that mean?" Naruto demanded.

"It means it'll attack any blood type including its own. This isn't organic. It's been engineered to destroy any blood it comes in contact with. There's no way a person could have this in their body. They would die immediately," sighed Sakura. Pressing her palms to her closed eyes, she took a calming breath. It was no wonder that her antivenins weren't as effective as they should have been. The blood was hiding behind the effects of the poisons, splitting the blood cells apart as soon as the poisons had been neutralized.

"I'm an O and I tried mixing my blood with an isolated sample. O is the universal donor so it should be compatible with anything. This is what I got," Sakura continued, gesturing toward the beaker with her toe. A hiss seeped out through Takumi's clenched teeth as he crouched next to Kei to observe too. The blackened mass stuck to the bottom of the glass didn't seem like it had ever been the life-giving fluid running through the body. The charred odor of the smoke was more sickening when they knew what it was from.

"So this is bad," Naruto concluded. Hands falling to her lap, Sakura shook her head.

"No. We can add low doses of dopamine to the treatment. This'll make it a little easier to counteract the effects. It's just… gross… and terrible to know what it really is." A short snort of laughter left Naruto.

"You. Saying gross. Wow," the blond teased as he put his hands on her knees and knocked them together.

"Get out of here, Naruto. I've got work to do," she snapped through her own smile.

"Cheer up, Sakura-chan. You probably just saved like 50 people in four hours. We're gonna be fine with you around," said Naruto with such optimism that she almost believed him. Tapping her forehead against his, she gave him a little push. Naruto stuck around to give her a hug before he finally relented and left. Pausing in the doorway, he rested his hand on the frame to look back at her.

"We'll be fine," Naruto uttered again. This time it sounded less like a statement and more like a question. Putting on a cheerful grin, Sakura tilted her head back.

"Of course we'll be fine," she confirmed. Watching Naruto's back, she wondered if saying something enough times would make it true.

Her students shooed her out of the clinic while they cleaned up and mapped out her new findings in their notes. Too jittery to sleep and too worried to eat, Sakura climbed up on the roof to watch the camp like she always did. The wooden planks were slightly damp from the light rain last night but she sat anyway.

The bustle of bodies, the swell of many voices. When she closed her eyes, she could pretend she was back home, walking through the market. Even with the protective genjutsu and the traps laid out all around them, Sakura couldn't help but feel exposed. The night sky that she loved so dearly felt foreboding. The milky way was a whispered warning across the stars. She felt exposed, like her skin wasn't thick enough to protect her from what was coming.

Eventually, Sasuke found her. He always found her. They looked at each other. Sasuke seemed to examine her expression carefully before he just sat down next to her. A thin smile, a reflex, flashed across her lips. Sasuke saw through that in a heartbeat. The wrinkle in his forehead reminded her of that when he stared at her.

"So," he said. It was a beginning. A question. A prompt.

"Nothing," Sakura answered too quickly.

"Sakura." A sigh of frustration this time.

"Nothing's wrong. What are you, my shrink?" she tried to brush off with a joke. Knees pulled up to her chest, she began to wonder if her skin really was transparent if even Sasuke could see her so easily.

"Normally when you make some sort of huge breakthrough you can't wait to tell everyone about it. But you're hiding up here like a raccoon," pointed out Sasuke.

"I…" Sakura trailed off. The words stuck in her throat. That smile she always salvaged for Naruto was gone. Because he needed that assurance. She had to be strong for him. And now that he wasn't there, the terror resurfaced.

"We just started to be a team again. We were all broken up for so long and now you're here," she whispered. Her finger inched out and bumped against the side of Sasuke's hand. His eyes followed the movement, dark and solemn.

"I want us to win. I want this goddamn war to be over. But… But I don't want us to have to fight," Sakura continued on. Sasuke pulled his hand away from hers so abruptly that it stung. Before the pain could fully process, Sasuke's arm was over her shoulders, pulling her close. Pressed against his side, and slightly bewildered, she looked up at him. Sasuke's expression was as nonchalant as usual. But there was a glint of something in his eyes, in the downward curl of his mouth.

"We'll be fine, Sakura. We always are," he tried to remind her. His awkward attempt at reassurance was clumsy at best. Normally that effort alone would be enough to coax a smile out of her.

"I would die if you died, Sasuke. You or Naruto or Sai. I would just drop down dead," was her sighed response.

"Naruto's too hard-headed to die. I'm pretty sure that Sai guy's not human. I'm too strong-" Sakura cut him off with a snort. She was sure that was intentional because the corner of his mouth twitched up.

"And you're too stubborn to die," he concluded.

"…I guess," she grudgingly agreed. She mulled over his words for a while. With a wistful expression, she stared off into the sky.

"If I became a ghost, I'd haunt the hell out of Naruto. I don't think I'd be able to scare you," Sakura suddenly declared.

"After that whole Edo Tensei debacle, stuff like that doesn't mean much," Sasuke agreed. She instantly regretted touching on a subject so close to Itachi and she turned her head to apologize. But he turned her face back with his palm without looking at her and they went on staring down at the camp. Sakura tried not to smile. If it had been last fall, she would have never imagined doing something like this. She could have never begun to fantasize about leaning against Sasuke without the constant terror that he would turn right around and stab her.

This Sasuke was broken but he was slightly less broken than before and the person surfacing through the cracks was someone very dear indeed. Sakura was a terrible judge of character. Ino and half the village always said so. She fell into relationships (romantic and platonic) with the wrong expectations and sometimes she ended up getting hurt. But from the deepest part of her gut, from the depths of her soul, there was a sighed declaration of "friend" each time she saw Sasuke.

Stealing a sideways glance at him, Sakura wondered what would happen if she had misjudged Sasuke again. What if he ended up betraying her and Naruto a second time? The sharp stab of imagined pain said it all. She would weep openly again, clutching at Naruto. And once more, they would dry their tears and gather up the shattered pieces of their team. They would move on. This time Sai would be by their side and they would pull through it. Time would pass and the grief would grow softer and softer until it was nothing but a dull ache. But there would eternally be that Sasuke-shaped hole between them, a Sasuke-shaped scar in her heart. And they would carry that weight of his memory forever, not quite blaming, but not quite forgiving either.

The idea was too sad. Sakura shook her head to banish the thought and she could feel Sasuke's stare on her. She shoved those ideas far back for a later time. There would be plenty of time to brood over things like that later. Hopefully.

They sat idly. She flexed her toes inside her boots and Sasuke rubbed at the stubble on his jaw. Sasuke's body temperature always ran a little high, she noticed. The heat was nice against her side. The spring nights still had a little bite of cold to them.

Sakura let out a deep breath.

"Well, I guess that means if I die, you can have my house. Naruto and Sai can fight over my DVD collection," she laughed in an attempt to break the heavy mood. As she moved to stand, Sasuke pulled her back down. Hand pressed to the side of her head, he fixed her with a dark look.

"Sakura, don't you dare leave me alone," he uttered in a low voice that made the hair on her arms rise. She met his gaze and for a moment, his brown eyes shone with utter honesty. But then his mouth pulled into the familiar smirk and that moment of tension faded.

"How the hell am I supposed to deal with Naruto by myself?" he added in a grumble. Saying this, he let his head droop against her left shoulder. A little touched, a little surprised, and very amused, Sakura felt a smile creep up on her face.

In that moment, Sakura was absolutely certain that she had never felt closer to Sasuke than she did now.

* * *

><p>All the painstaking weeks of planning and strategy went to hell two days later. Just after dawn, an explosion rocked the camp. Swearing and stumbling out of bed, Sakura threw her clothes on and sprang out of her room. Takumi's wide eyes met hers. He stood with his back to the door, a kunai clutched in his right hand. Eyes darting around the dark room, Sakura bit down on her thumb. She muttered out the summons while rushing through the seals. With a tiny pop, smoke puffed up and three slugs appeared before her.<p>

They wriggled their eyestalks in greeting. Picking up the smallest, which fit into the palm of her hand, Sakura whispered her instructions.

"Uneru, go back to Konoha. Tell Katsuyu that we're under attack. I need you to keep us connected," she instructed in a hushed voice. With a little dip of its white head, the smallest slug poofed away. As the other two slugs silently watched, Sakura hunted through the shelves until she found and old, worn scroll.

Smearing the rest of the blood on her thumb onto the outside, she performed more seals. She flung the scroll open as she fed chakra into the aged paper in a steady trickle. All the books on the shelves disappeared in puffs smoke. The titles appeared on the worn surface of the paper one by one until the shelves were clean. She repeated the process on another scroll for the rest of the medical paraphernalia. Sakura turned to the slugs again- twins, about the size of small dogs. She spoke quickly as she rolled up the scrolls and bound them in bright red cord.

"Futa, This is the research on the Delta-Hachi and the antivenin. Keep them safe. Don't even give them to Shishou. And I need you to the take the rest of my research. This can't fall into the wrong hands." One of them opened its mouth and bit down on the leather journal Sakura treasured so much. Takumi helped it wriggle on a messenger bag filled with frozen samples of the Delta-Hachi from their research. He watched with nervous eyes as Sakura secured the two scrolls to the other slug.

"Should we alert Tamiyo-dono to come assist you?" she asked as she wriggled in the harness to make sure the scrolls would not fall off.

"No. She still has some traces of the Delta-Hachi in her. Tell her to stay far away too, Go. I can't risk her being captured," Sakura replied. The twin slugs nodded.

"Be safe, Sakura-sama," the second slug said. They disappeared in puffs of twin smoke while Takumi stood wringing his hands.

Sakura stood still for a moment. Her eyes slid shut as she reached across the camp, quickly surveying the situation but more importantly, looking for two very important signatures. As expected, she found Naruto in the thick of things, his chakra surging like a swirling storm as he fought. Sasuke was somewhere there too. She could almost hear the crackle of his chidori from here. Everyone else was scattered around, engaging in combat wherever they could. The teams were fragmented, the captains otherwise engaged.

"What're we going to do, Sensei?" Takumi whispered. Sakura opened her eyes. Her apprentice was still standing at the door, his fingers clenching the weapon. The fear shown bright in his gaze but he refused to run. She paused to spare him a slight smile.

"Ino's making her way here as we speak. Kei's suppressing her signature so I'm guessing she's trying to g-" Sakura broke off as she heard an urgent tap on the door. Takumi peered out the small window and then scrambled to let Kei inside. He shoved the door shut again, bracing his weight against it again. Brushing her tangled hair out of her eyes, Kei paused to catch her breath.

"Are you hurt?" Sakura demanded. Kei shook her head as she panted.

"Ino?" Sakura went on to ask.

"Outside. Still fighting," Kei choked out in short sentences.

"It smells sweet," Takumi suddenly commented. Both women turned to look at him.

"Cyanide sweet. I think they're deploying the Delta-Hachi," he clarified.

"What better chance to use a flesh-rotting poison than when your enemies are gathered in one place?" Sakura muttered. She stood with her hands on her hips, eyes scanning the clinic as she thought. As another explosion shook the wooden building, she made a decision. Sakura reached into her back pouch as she spoke quickly.

"This is something the lab at Konoha's been developing. It's called Siren. Very potent. It's a paralytic agent. Just a prick with one drop should keep someone out of commission for two days," Sakura said, tossing each of her companions a small metal canister.

Kei was already wearing the special glove based on Shizune's own weapon of choice. It was less of a glove and more of a holster fitted to the right arm. Kei snapped the little container into the round slot on her bicep. There was a little hiss as it depressurized. From there, the poison would flow through the small tubes and into the several different compartments holding tiny senbon at her elbows and wrists. They had made it standard medic attire for anyone going out the border. The training had been made compulsory and it tended to be a handy device. Takumi dug his own glove out from his desk and tugged it into place. As he stood tightening buckles and adjusting Velcro, Kei swallowed thickly.

"What about you, Sensei? Aren't you going to put your glove on?" she inquired. Takumi snapped his canister into position and it hissed. With the poison flowing into the glove, he looked a lot less nervous.

With a sly smile, Sakura patted her right leg. She had customized hers to be fitted into the lining of her boots. The needles shot out of the soles and it had come in handy more than once. She nudged the canisters into place with an audible snap. And then she reached onto a shelf where her mask sat waiting. They had gotten a lot less strict about wearing the mask everywhere but if there was ever a time for it, it was now. The porcelain molded against her cheekbones and fit snugly over the front of her chin. Snapping the strap in place, she let her bangs fall naturally over the front.

"I want you two to stick together. Kei, focus on the injured. Takumi, watch her back and help out where you can," ordered Sakura. As she began walking toward the door, Takumi's eyes widened.

"What about you, Sensei?" he asked. Takumi stepped aside. Not looking back at them, Sakura yanked her usual gloves on and tightened the straps around her wrists. She flexed her fingers and clenched her fists, listening to the creak of the black fabric.

"I've got my boys to take care of," she told them. She burst out of the clinic, leaving the two wondering which boys she was talking about.

The Root defectors hadn't even bothered to change their uniforms. Dressed in black with their headbands brazenly in place, they hacked away at anyone with their swords. Some of them had the audacity to proudly wear their Konoha headbands. The soldiers from Sound were swathed in a much more colorful variety of attire. They stood out against the white vests of the Konoha ANBU. They had been caught so completely off-guard that half of them hadn't even had time to put on their masks or arm guards.

As soon as Sakura set foot out of the clinic, she was assaulted on all sides by a piercing wave of sound. Resisting the impulse to clamp her hands over her ears, she took a deep breath and slammed her palms down on the ground. The ripple that cracked through the earth threw her assailant off balance enough to stop the noise. She tackled, ripping her chakra-fueled fist through the chest cavity. The frantic throbbing of his heart stilled under her hand and she shoved him away, wiping her fingers carelessly on his shirt.

All thoughts of organizing the teams really disappeared when another explosion shook the ground underneath her feet.

"SAKURA, GET DOWN!" Naruto bellowed as he charged at her. She ducked just in time for Naruto to leapfrog over her while catching the kunai aimed where her head would have been. He flung it back at its owner and it made contact in a sickening squelch. Their backs pressed together, Sakura glanced back to assess his condition. There was red flecking the bottom of his mask and the side of his armor but he didn't look hurt.

"Is any of that blood yours?" she demanded.

"Huh? No. You okay?" Naruto hissed back. Their eyes darted around, sweeping the area before returning to each other. Sakura didn't like the look of one man who landed in front of her. Angling his head to one side, he swept over her with his eyes and then licked his lips.

"I'm fine," she breathed out.

"There you are. We've been looking for you, Haruno Sakura," the slimy man chuckled out as he took a step toward her.

"Uh oh," Naruto said as several more figures landed around them.

"Danzo told us to bring you to him but he never said to bring you alive."

"Goddamn this hair," sighed Sakura.

"Why don't you make a run for it, Sakura-chan? " Naruto suggested between his teeth.

"Sure," Sakura replied. Dashing forward, she planted her foot against the chest of the man who had spoken. Her fingers pushed the trigger embedded into the palm of her glove and a single needle slipped out, stabbing between his ribs. His face frozen in a sneer, he toppled to the side. And in the ensuing confusion, Naruto exploded into three different clones and Sakura slipped off into the fray.

The smoke stung her eyes and the metallic perfume of blood was already thick in the air. She threw herself into the forest, relying on the thick swaths of evergreen leaves to cover her. They blundered through the foliage after her, not even caring about stealth. There were close to 30 of them and only one of her. Even as the sounds of fighting faded into the distance, they thundered along behind her, never falling back even half a step. Occasionally a sharp noise whizzed past her, weapons undoubtedly laced with poison thrown to mock her rather than to really harm.

With her heart pounding in her chest, she glanced back for a fraction of a second before facing forward again. Gritting her teeth, she skidded to a halt. Her arms wrapped around the nearest tree, tearing the long roots from the wet soil. She swung hard, smashing into other trees and taking down a few people in the process.

"Have you decided to fight, little girl?"

The tree crashed to the ground at her feet.

"Sure. If your mommies will let you," Sakura sneered in response.

Far away, Naruto raced toward her and she just needed to hold out until then.

* * *

><p>*Kohai is the opposite of senpai. A word for underclassman or junior.<p> 


	8. Plum Blossom

Super-long chapter because I couldn't find a good place to cut it. Super-emotional chapter because of an excuse I can't think of. I did not expect to be so emotionally exhausted after writing this.

* * *

><p>"Sakura, Chouji proposed to me, can you believe it?!"<p>

"Sensei, I passed the exam! I'm a licensed medic now!"

"Aside from you constantly smashing me through walls, I find that you and Naruto are my closest friends."

"Sakura-chan! Ramen!"

"It's nice to see that my little student has grown up to become such a fine woman."

"What you do is much better than good enough."

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 8: Plum Blossom

The soft muddle of smiles and warm laughter swirled around in her head. The biggest cliché in the world was fulfilled. Her life flooded out before her, a mélange of voices and soft hugs and the smell of antiseptic. In the brief moments between memories, in the small gaps, there was such an intense pain that her brain couldn't even fully process it. How strange it was, that the fuzzy comfort in her head and the sharp agony in her body could exist all at once. But then she heard a cough and the illusion shattered.

Mud was cold and slimy all over her. It had started raining not too long ago. And it wasn't one of those gentle, poetic showers like in the romance stories she kept hidden in the back of her bookcase. A torrential downpour soaked the earth. And the swath of forest that had been obliterated in the fight was suddenly a filthy puddle of brown goop.

With the smells of flesh and scorched earth battling inside her nose, Sakura tried to lift her head to get a better look at her surroundings. The memories of how she had gotten there were spotty at best.

She had fled camp, chased closely by some of the most stubborn enemies she had encountered in a while. When she had managed to eliminate a few of them, Naruto had thundered onto the scene with his Nine-Tails chakra flaring around him in a tight, blazing shroud. After that, the smoke from explosions and the sickening wrench of pain in her back were all that stood out in clarity. Flashes of her katana slicing through people and of Naruto weaving around dealing punches met her efforts to remember.

A trip wire. In all the smoke and debris generated during the fight, someone had set up an intricate trap. Naruto's toe tugged the wire a fraction of a second before she had noticed its presence. An enormous fireball that singed the hairs on her arms exploded in the clearing. It was a suicidal attempt fueled by desperation. Naruto, at the heart of the trap, would have been destroyed had it not been for his chakra shielding him. The enemy troops were incinerated and her distance from the chaos was all that saved her.

A hard tackle from the back? Had she stabbed him or had she smashed his face in? Either way, she had collapsed under the weight of the corpse, struggling to shove it aside with her shattered ribs. The deep throb from her abdomen alerted her of severe internal bleeding.

Following the noises of the wet coughs through the rain, she dragged her mangled legs through the muck. In one desperate flail, she groped around but felt nothing under her fingers. Then, there was a light touch against her right foot. A trembling, frail touch.

Naruto. He was still moving. He was still breathing.

And here she lay, wheezing against the heaviness of her own body. The overwhelming weariness seized her with cool hands, dragging her deeper and deeper into the mud. Because Naruto was drowning in his own bodily fluids and Sakura could feel the blood seeping out into her body, pooling where it shouldn't be.

Was it all over?

Had they won the battle?

Did any of it matter?

As she turned these questions over in her head, a strange sense of resignation washed over her. The anger drained from her limbs. All she could feel was that it was cold and that everything hurt and a voice was saying that nothing would hurt if she died.

But Naruto. Would Naruto be alright? As if answering, he let out a sickly, wet cough. His fingers curled weakly over her ankle.

"Taichou! Taichou, where are you?" a voice called through the rain. There was splashing. Feet pounded through the mud in loud squelches. Were those dogs barking the distance?

"Shit! Over here!" someone shouted. Sucking in a shaky breath, Sakura stared up at the gray sky. A shadow fell across her face, blocking out the cold droplets of rain for a moment. The clinical touch of fingers pressing against her throat and then peeling her eyelids back was reassuring. The hint of baby fat lingering on his cheeks along with the dark gold eyes gave him away. His touch probed along her side and she let out a strangled whimper.

"She's alive!" Takumi yelled out.

"Good. Someone get the stretcher out here. I don't think either of them can walk," Kakashi ordered from farther back.

"Sensei, if you can understand me, look up," said Takumi. With the pain shooting through what felt like all her nerves, it took a moment to process his words. And then, slowly, she ordered her gaze upward the slightest bit. His smile was filled with relief. Kakashi's dogs ran over with the stretcher gripped between their teeth. They lowered it down into the muck, waiting.

"Sensei, I'm going to pick you up now. I think you've broken some ribs so this will hurt," he informed her in a clear voice.

Sakura saw white as her apprentice lifted her into his arms. The voices around her wavered, warbled and distorted as her head spun. The stead throb in her abdomen rose in a crescendo that made it feel like her sides might split and let her organs spill out. A weak hiss of pain left her. Her voice wouldn't come out any more than that.

"T…Taku…mi," she choked out. Her broken fingers pawed at the front of his shirt. Bewildered eyes flitted down to her.

"Good job," Sakura whispered before everything faded in a swirling mass of gray.

"Sensei!"

This time the drifting was different. She had caught a glimpse of Naruto being lifted into a second stretcher. Takumi was here. They had found the both of them. Her broken, crooked body would pull through somehow.

And from somewhere far away, she heard Sasuke's voice.

"_Sakura, don't you dare leave me alone."_

* * *

><p>"Her right ulna is split. And her sternum is completely shattered," Takumi said in a hushed tone.<p>

"I know. Keep your voice down," whispered Kei with a soft shushing noise. Her eyes darted pointedly to the figure in the plastic folding chair next to the bed. Sasuke's arms were crossed loosely and his chin rested on his chest. Takumi glanced over too before he looked away. It was pretty obvious to the trained medics that he wasn't really sleeping. After all, the flow of his chakra and his breathing patterns didn't match up the way they should. He would fool anyone but a medical professional.

They had seen a lot of men like him before and they had seen him too many times not to notice. He kept their teacher company during her long hours of research. He pretended to be reading, to be engrossed in her dry encyclopedias. And if she scolded him about not getting enough rest, he would close his eyes and lean back in her chair, as if she didn't know he was faking it. That seemed to be enough to placate her and a man with trauma like Uchiha Sasuke wasn't going to fall asleep easily anyway.

When the rescue team had discovered the battered bodies of Uzumaki Naruto and Haruno Sakura, they had run back as quickly as possible. It had been a difficult call to make but they had decided that if Sakura lived, she would be able to heal many people. They weighed her survival over Naruto's to start her treatment first and Takumi knew she would have beaten them into a pulp if she were conscious. Because she would have killed herself a thousand times to save Naruto.

So they found the sources of her internal bleeding, fitted her bones back together as best they could. With Kei working on Sakura all through the night, Takumi and Ino had tended to the rest of the wounded including Naruto, who had fallen into a coma in the time it had taken to treat him. Three people slipped through their fingers. And it was worse because they knew Sakura would have been able to save all three of them.

The three medics healed Sakura in shifts because her ruptured kidney and punctured liver refused to stop bleeding. A soft yellow tinge rose to her skin signaling the beginnings of liver failure.

Uchiha Sasuke barely left his chair. The only times he was gone were for the bare bodily necessities or to visit Naruto. The Delta-Hachi in Naruto's system was just barely kept in check by their antivenin but the large quantity was too big for them to handle. Only Sakura could perform the poison extraction on Naruto's fragile body without killing him. With his condition slowly crumbling a little more each day, they tried to keep him on an IV to keep his body from going into shock.

What baffled everyone was why Sakura didn't break into her yin seal. Even unconscious, her body knew what to do. She should have been able to fix herself within a day. Instead, she remained silent and immobile while the desperation of the remaining medics mounted higher and higher each day.

Four days after the attack, Takumi sat with his hands over Sakura's abdomen. As his chakra poured into her, he silently willed her gushing veins to finally close up. The antidote to this anticoagulant would have been a snap for her to make. And the journal containing the formula was gone too, taken to safety by her slugs. While he lamented his inability to do anything, he noticed a strange glow coming from her.

"…Sasaki-san…SASAKI-SAN!" Takumi called, the panic making his voice go up. The clinic door immediately burst open and Kei ran in. Through all the noise, Sasuke's eyes opened but he didn't move otherwise.

"Something's happening but… is it** that**?" asked Takumi in a hushed voice. Kei's eyes widened as she yanked him away.

"Get your hands off. You'll get hurt," she snapped.

"What's going on?" demanded Sasuke. The medics turned. They had completely forgotten about him.

"Do you ever wonder why Sensei's name is Shiroi Hane, Uchiha-san?" Kei inquired. It did always seem odd that a ground type chakra would be called "White Wings".

"I've heard rumors about this. I've heard she's only used it twice before," commented Takumi in a voice soft with awe.

As they watched the yin seal on Sakura's chest glowed bright turquoise. Wisps of white rose around her shoulders and arms. The blue light focused into one blinding point, shining hot through her tattered shirt. With a loud hiss, threads of white chakra bloomed out from her seal. They unfurled, blossoming across her chest like a wilting flower.

"I don't understand. Healing chakra should be green," Takumi whispered. As they watched, the tendrils of chakra stretched upwards, stretching taut.

"That's not healing chakra, Takumi-kun. That's pure chakra, concentrated inside that seal. If you touch it, it'll burn the flesh straight off your bones," Kei replied with a solemn note. The fabric of Sakura's shirt singed off where the chakra came into contact. The white threads dipped, curling over themselves until they rested just above the yin seal. For a moment, everything was silent as they stared at the strange sight before them. And then, the threads began to condense, shapes thickening and elongating. Forearms and wrists emerged. Elbows and slender fingers. A small patch of slightly darker gray glowed on the palms of some of the hands.

"Is she going to heal herself?" demanded Sasuke. For some reason, Kei looked like she might be sick and Takumi cast him a nervous look.

"That's not what I would call it, Uchiha-san," Takumi responded in a wavering voice. Before Sasuke could pursue that line of inquiry, there was a sickening ripping sound. The wet squelch of tearing skin and flesh drew their eyes again. The hands were grabbing at her chest, splitting through the layers of white skin and dark red insides until they reached the harsh gleam of bone. And then there was a series of loud cracks that made Sasuke swallow hard. Those deft fingers broke the bones while others continued to tear through her skin. There was the scorched smell of burnt flesh and a surprisingly small amount of blood soaked into what remained of her shirt.

"The chakra's cauterizing her blood vessels," narrated Kei. Her voice was barely audible with her hand pressed firmly to her mouth. Takumi's fingers were twisting into the bottom of his shirt so hard that it looked ready to rip.

Her pink lungs rose and fell calmly throughout all this. And the steady throb of her heart was visible between the lines of her ribs. It was impossible to look away, even as those white hands continued cracking through bones and lifting them into the air.

"But we just reset those. Why is she breaking them again?" asked Takumi. All three of them flinched in unison when one of the hands pressed a palm to the flat plane of her sternum and pushed until it splintered in two. The sound of bones grinding together and snapping had made Kei turn a little green. Still, she heard her underclassman's question and glanced his way.

"We must have set them incorrectly. She'll fix anything that hasn't been done perfectly."

As if following those words, the hands that had been so deftly breaking off ribs now replaced them precisely inside her chest. As the broken ends of bone touched, they glowed with the same white light. Almost instantly, new bone grew between the parts, fusing them back together so perfectly that there was no evidence of a break in the first place. This happened for seven separate ribs until her ribcage was as whole and as perfect as an anatomical model skeleton.

Hands crept over her sternum, nudging the bone parts into place to fuse them back together too. Then the fingers dug deep between ribs, grabbing up severed blood vessels and the tiny nerves that accompanied them. In movements so quick that only Sasuke with his sharingan managed to catch them, they matched the tubes together. They connected the tiniest parts and nudged them back where they belonged.

Dark green goop pooled over her ribs. The droplets siphoned out of her blood vessels and into one blob that one of the hands then grasped. Smoke hissed into the air and then the hand opened, revealing that the goop had disappeared.

"Amazing. She metabolized the anticoagulant with her chakra," Takumi whispered with wide eyes.

The hands grabbed the flayed edges of her skin while others began meshing the torn layers of muscle back over her chest. The cells fused back together with hisses and steam curled into the air. When the final layer of outer skin was placed back on, the fingers split into tiny threads again. They weaved in and out, sewing the pieces back together with glowing stitches that melted away. After all this was done, the only hint of the traumatic surgery she had experienced was a faint peach line that slowly faded away.

"Oh no," Kei said faintly as the hands moved lower. She and Takumi jerked their heads away as the fingers tore into the taught flesh over the stomach. The gashes they had just healed split open again and dark blood bubbled up, spilling over her sides.

The sound of Sakura breaking her own bones had been terrible but the sight of her organs bared to the world was something on an entirely new level.

For hours, Sakura gouged into her flesh and unraveled things just to sew them back up again. The smell was terrible, metallic and just wrong. And the grinding, searing hisses of knitting flesh were terrible sounds that only repeated over and over again. Sasuke kept his arms crossed. His expression remained tight as he watched her. Kei kept her handkerchief clamped tightly to her mouth and she needed to avert her eyes often. Takumi held onto her sleeves, trembling furiously as he refused to look away.

After what seemed like forever, those glowing fingers of chakra patched her flesh together, leaving the skin completely unblemished except for the scar next to her bellybutton and the dark patch on her palms. They stared, waiting for her to move on to her arms and legs.

Instead, her eyes opened.

Still light and tinged with blue, her vibrant irises seemed out of place in her haggard expression. Both pupils dilated and contracted, adjusting to the darkness of the room. She sucked in a deep breath through barely-parted lips.

"Naruto?" she asked in a tiny voice.

"We found him. Ino-senpai's working on him right now," responded Takumi. Sakura's eyebrows knit together. Slowly, she turned her head to the left and then to the right, searching.

"And Sasuke?" demanded Sakura. She seemed to be having trouble finding him in the dimly-lit room. Takumi and Kei just looked back and forth from their teacher and one another. Uncrossing his arms, Sasuke leaned forward in his chair and put his hand up on the bed. A light tap from his fingers against her shoulder alerted her to his presence. Her chapped lips pulled into a pained smile. She tried to move her left hand but the broken bones sent a stab of pain through her. Sasuke's sharp gaze caught this. He moved his hand instead, letting it drift upwards. His palm cupped her cheek so she tilted her head, angling into his touch.

"You're okay?" Sakura queried. Her voice was so fragile, almost childlike.

"Yeah," he simply said.

"My boys. You're safe," was all she managed to murmur before her eyes slid shut again.

"Sensei, your arms and legs still…" Kei's hesitant worlds trailed off.

"I know," Sakura responded. Taking one more deep breath, Sakura opened her eyes again. She stared at the arms of chakra extending from her chest.

In a voice that possessed surprising strength, Sakura ordered, "Help me up. You're not done yet." And those hands seized her shoulders. The flesh underneath hissed angrily, peeling and turning bright red. Sakura gritted her teeth as she was pulled upright. As she inhaled through her nostrils, steam rose from her shoulders while the charred skin peeled to reveal an unblemished layer. The hands retreated, hovering in front of her.

"Release," she ordered.

Without hesitation, the white hands of chakra curled over her shoulders and head. The slender arms detached, floating in airy wisps that reattached themselves to her shoulder blades. The yin seal on her chest glowed a shade of bright blue that shone through the gaping tears in her ruined shirt.

"What the…" Sasuke muttered to himself as he finally realized something so glaringly obvious. The length of those forearms, the shape of the hands and tapering fingers- it was a detail simple and bewildering all at once. Taking away the ethereal glow and watching the confident grace of those arms, Sasuke realized something amazing.

"Those are your arms," he finally said. The limbs of chakra now sprouting from her back were identical to the arms lying limp at her sides. Down to the scar on her palm and the jut of her wrist bones, the details were exactly the same. And the arms cradled her softly, warm palms hovering just above her collarbones and almost cupping her cheeks. There were eight of them in total, radiant.

Wings.

Ah, white wings. The codename finally clicked into place. This was the name Sakura had claimed for herself, the name that had been bestowed upon her.

Sakura's steady stare flickered to him. Her irises darkened rapidly, the blue warping until it was the clear shade of aquamarine he recognized. Then she looked down at her arms. She clicked her tongue softly as she surveyed the damage.

Then, without warning, a glowing hand descended each to her arms. Fingers firmly grasped her wrists and then with a vicious tug, they snapped the bones again. The loud crack was somehow much worse with Sakura sitting up and watching the process. Her expression barely shifted save for the twitch in the left side of her jaw. Her skin split open under the prying fingers. The neat lines of her throbbing muscles opened up to reveal the crooked fragments of bone. While the hands busied themselves arranging the bones and rewiring them with blood vessels and lines of muscles and tendons, another strange thought occurred to Sasuke. Turning his attention to Sakura's two students, Sasuke saw that the sickness in their stares wasn't from disgust. These two were trained professionals. Their very lives revolved around the workings of the broken human body and the ways to fix them.

So what was making Kei look ready to vomit? Takumi met Sasuke's probing gaze as if reading his thoughts. Pointing a trembling finger at Sakura, Takumi flinched visibly when another bone snapped.

"When we work, a portion of our chakra goes into relieving pain and numbing the body during healing process. Things like reattaching nerves and growing new cells can be very painful. Even when we don't purposely numb, there's always some reduction to the actual pain. Sensei has found a way to bypass that," explained the boy.

"By using condensed chakra instead of healing chakra, she uses pure energy to treat injuries. It's several times more effective and efficient. The only drawback being that… the suffering of the patient…" Kei joined in but her words drifted off. Sakura punctuated the lull in conversation by tearing into her flesh to get to her upper arms too.

"A solider pill and some water would be nice," Sakura said quietly. Takumi was immediately rooting through supplies while Kei practically sprinted out of the room to get water.

Only Sasuke sat, unmoving. His hand was still pressed against her cheek. It felt a little too warm. And it was only because he was touching her that Sasuke felt Sakura trembling softly. Even though her expressions remained neutral, each crack of bone made her shake the tiniest bit.

"Why're you doing this to yourself? Why don't you just heal normally?" demanded Sasuke, even though he wasn't really expecting an answer. But Sakura's stare flickered to him. Tears were welling up that he hadn't even noticed before.

"Because… Naruto needs me. He's calling for me, Sasuke," she told him in a small voice. With a pained smile, Sakura shut her eyes. A burst of chakra rippled down from her shoulders to her fingertips. The bones and flesh sealed together in one slick movement. And then the hands were on her legs, repeating the process. The only difference was that the noises of the shattered femurs and tibias was much louder, much more sickening. By the time her legs had been reconstructed and mended, all the way down to her toes, there were tears streaming freely down Sakura's cheeks. No sound left her mouth but her teeth clenched to hold back what were undoubtedly shrieks of agony.

Takumi and Kei stood at the foot of the bed, their expressions blank with panic. So Sasuke slipped his arm under Sakura's back to hold her up. He pushed the little brown pill in her mouth, watching to make sure she ground it up between her teeth. And then he lifted the cup to her lips, listening to her swallow and silently burning the sight of her tears into his memory.

It was the first time he had seen her cry for her own suffering and not for anyone else's in a long while.

Sakura's breath came in shallow pants. Her fingers twisted and pulled at the sheets. A strangled noise escaped her mouth as her body took on a faint glow. With his forearm still pressed to Sakura's back to hold her up, he felt her skin heat up. And then she let out a deep sigh of relief, a sound so profound that it seemed to come up from her toes. Sasuke let out a breath he hadn't realized he had been holding.

The furrows in Sakura's forehead evened out. Her jaw slowly unclenched. Even the tense muscles in her back relaxed. She sat there, hands in her lap. She wiggled her fingers experimentally, eyeing the movement of the flesh over bones. Then she reached up to calmly wipe her tears.

"And that was Sensei rewiring her nervous system," whispered Kei in her final bit of commentary.

"Rewiring?" Sasuke repeated.

"After trauma, sometimes the body continues processing the pain for a long time. I sort of reset those signals. Good as new," Sakura told him. To prove her point, she reached up and tapped her pointer finger against his nose. She braced her hand against his shoulder as she tried to get out of the bed. Unfortunately, her knees buckled and Sasuke had to grab her before she could fall. She let out a frustrated huff as she sat back down for a moment.

"I guess the connections aren't completely set yet. Give me a second," she sighed, her fingers curling into his shoulder. With a grunt, she pulled herself up again, this time letting Sasuke bear part of her of her weight. She wobbled a little but her legs seemed to be handling the strain better this time.

"I'm assuming from your looks of absolute terror that Naruto's not doing too well," Sakura guessed. Takumi gulped. He knew Sakura to be relatively level-headed about most things save for when anything had to do with her teammates. He nodded slowly.

"Alright. This isn't going to last forever so we should move," ordered Sakura. As she spoke, she motioned to the arms of chakra still hovering over her.

"Sensei, Uzumaki-taichou's in worse shape than you were. We think he might have inhaled Delta-Hachi. His lungs won't inflate and he's remained unresponsive for a while," Kei reported. Sakura's gaze sharpened.

"How long was I out for?" she asked in a voice that was suddenly dangerously sharp.

"Almost five days b-" Sakura cut Kei off as she abruptly released Sasuke and hobbled off. She slammed the door open with her shoulder as she exited the clinic.

"You really shouldn't operate in your condition. Your body-" Takumi frantically insisted as he ran after her.

"My immune system's going to be shot after this regardless. A few extra hours won't hurt," Sakura assured him.

"Sensei, please wait! We should at least administer some sort of sedative to Uzumaki-taichou first!" yelled Takumi as he continued chasing her through the base. Sakura's shaky knees wobbled but didn't buckle. Her head didn't turn his way even once as she strode on.

"He's comatose, Takumi. He won't feel anything," she answered in terse words.

"But if he wakes up…" the boy continued as they reached the tent,

"Then we'll know he's alive if he wakes up screaming," Sakura firmly stated. She ducked into the tent with Takumi staring after her. The white limbs of chakra still clinging to her back were hot as they almost brushed his arm. Professionalism and logic were what he had come to expect from his teacher. Not cruelty.

Kei followed after, her eyes briefly meeting his. The uncertainty in her gaze probably matched his. Unlike him, however, she didn't say anything.

But Sasaki Kei was different from him. She and Ginkaku Nozomi were from Konoha's orphanage. They had clawed their way through the medical program on sheer intelligence and tenacity alone. There had been no family to fall back on. Even Takumi had had the option to work with his uncle as a tailor had he failed as a medic.

Sakura calling their names out of the dozens of potential candidates had been a miracle. They were the forgotten children of past wars. And Sakura hadn't chosen them for their bloodlines or their clan ties. She had observed them during training, read through their written exams, and chosen based on seat number rather than by name.

Maybe that was why Kei and Nozomi never seemed willing to second-guess her. Kei would follow Sakura to the depths of hell and so would Nozomi. Takumi knew he would do the same. The only difference was that he would have to count to 3 before jumping in.

Taking a deep breath, Takumi followed them inside anyway. In the end, even if he didn't always agree with Sakura, he knew she was seldom wrong when it came to medicine.

Ino sat hunched over a cot in the middle of the row. The long hair she cherished was stringy, yanked out of her way in a bun that was already in the process of unraveling. Sakura didn't have to speak. She walked up to her old friend to place her hands on her shoulders. Ino didn't look too surprised. She hadn't been working long enough for her chakra reserves to have plummeted. Casting Sakura a wary look, Ino clucked her tongue.

"Show-off," scoffed Ino jokingly. A smile crossed Sakura's lips. She squeezed lightly until Ino let the chakra dissipate from her hands with a soft fizzle.

"Go tend to the others, Ino. I"ll handle this one," Sakura instructed. Ino almost looked ready to say something. Her stare flitted to the glowing appendages before flickering to Kei and Takumi.

"Don't let her kill herself," she warned them before she moved on to another patient.

Sakura took in the sweat dripping down Naruto's feverish brow. The bandage around his head along with the splint setting his left arm was the most obvious sources of damage. She sniffed delicately and the subtle scent of decay became apparent too. When she tugged the sheets aside, the discoloration on his arms and legs revealed the early stages of necrosis. She took a few steps back, standing at the foot of the cot.

Sucking in a deep breath, she raised his arms in front of her. The limbs of chakra, which had previously been hovering over her, copied her, rising up in a pose that almost looked threatening.

What happened afterwards was almost too awful to be described. The extent of Sakura's procedure had been simple compared to what Naruto underwent. His lungs were already rotting to the point where they had been struggling to keep them functioning. The white fingers of chakra tore them out, harvesting living cells to generate a new pair of lungs altogether. The poison seeped out of his blood vessels, gathering into palms and dissolving with a loud hiss.

As she shifted her attention to his unresponsive brain, a sharp stabbing sensation in her gut stopped her. The hands froze mid-movement. A few sealing Naruto's abdomen shut while others hovering over his face suddenly stilled. A noise slipped out of Sakura's mouth, alerting Kei and Takumi who rushed forward just in time to catch her as her legs faltered. Sucking in tiny, frantic breaths, she struggled to stand up again.

"Sensei, you're out of chakra. If you push yourself anymore your body will give out," Takumi warned her. His eyes watered as he shook her shoulder a little, as if that would put some sense into her again. Kei, with a grim expression, simply shook her head to convey her thoughts. But Sakura gritted her teeth. Letting them take part of her weight, she stubbornly forced her legs to straighten again.

"Then lend me some of yours!" she barked. Their looks of stunned silence only aggravated her further.

"This man is going to be the next Hokage. He is going to create a better world where kids don't lose their parents and where parents don't have to watch their children go off to war never to return. Naruto is carrying the hopes of an entire village and he is the person I believe in. So forgive me for being so selfish but I will do anything in my power to keep him breathing," hissed Sakura between her teeth.

Kei was quiet as she placed her palm on Sakura's right shoulder, squeezing tight.

And then, Takumi, tears streaming down his cheeks, grasped Sakura's other shoulder.

"Sensei, you idiot. What if we kill you?" Takumi sobbed.

"Thank you," was all Sakura responded. The blue streams of chakra flowed down into her chest, spreading through the pathways until they hit her seal. As soon as the seal glowed again, the arms sprang to life again. The fingers melded into Naruto's face, sweeping upwards until they were twisting into his brain. A shock of electricity jolted through the grey matter, stimulating and generating new connections. At the second bolt of electricity, Naruto gasped so hard that his back arched off the cot. His eyes sprang open, swiveling around wildly as he tried to process all of the pain at once.

"Sorry, Naruto. I still have to reconnect parts of your brain and then grow you a new liver. This going to hurt… a lot," Sakura said to him.

The answering scream of pain when she delved deeper into his brain was horrific. And tears flowed down Sakura's face as Takumi and Kei's chakras seared into her shoulders and the wings of chakra from her back charred and regenerated the flesh over and over again. Takumi continued to sob openly as he fed his chakra into her and beside him, Kei let the tears flow too.

Naruto's agonized wails went on for another hour until Sakura was done. She would have knocked him out but her chakra would sense his unconsciousness and seek to fix it immediately. It wouldn't have let him sleep in peace anyway. By the time she had sealed up his stomach for the last time, Naruto's voice was hoarse and Sakura looked as if she had aged an extra ten years. As soon as she was finished, the hands fizzled out in wisps of white smoke. She wobbled so Takumi and Kei stopped their chakra transfer to grab onto her.

"I'm fine," she breathed in a pained gasp.

The shaky rise and fall of Naruto's chest as he struggled not to cry was strangely reassuring to her. If he was still being a blockhead about not wanting to cry in front of her, he had to be alright.

"You did well, Naruto. It's over now," Sakura said as she reached out to pat his ankle. As if these words were the cue he had waited for, Naruto's eyes rolled back as he immediately lost consciousness.

Stinging pricks of pain radiated down from her shoulders all the way to her fingertips. Sakura felt Kei's fingers on her throat, checking her pulse.

"Sensei, you should really lie down," Takumi urged in her ear. Her fingers curled around his forearm while she nodded weakly. Bearing most of her weight, Kei and Takumi slowly guided her back to the clinic. When they reached the short set of stairs leading up into the building, her legs shook so hard that Takumi almost offered to carry her. But the fierce look in her eyes stopped him from doing so. Once they were inside, Sakura stumbled her way into the back room, collapsing on her sleeping bag.

Kei lingered to tug her boots off and then she eyed the shredded remains of Sakura's shirt. It was just barely keeping her chest covered. After a moment of thought, she rolled Sakura onto her back and peeled the torn remnants of fabric off. Digging through Sakura's bag in the corner, she found a clean black bandeau. Kei struggled to pull Sakura's arms up but managed to wriggle it on so her teacher would not wake up in the middle of an emergency and run out bare-chested. Satisfied with her work, she pulled the blanket out from underneath Sakura's legs and draped it over her. She left, shutting the door with a quiet click behind her.

* * *

><p>Naruto woke up about six hours later. Just like that. His eyes popped open and he sprang to his feet with his usual grin. And Takumi stared at him like he had just seen a corpse crawl out of its grave. A yawn escaped Naruto's mouth as he stretched his arms above his head.<p>

"Where's Sakura-chan?" he asked when he looked around and only found Takumi skulking around with a frown.

"Sensei's exhausted so she's sleeping right now. Please don't bother her. She healed herself and then you so she's burnt out," answered Takumi in a surly tone. Naruto paused to look at the boy's expression. When Takumi spotted Sasuke standing in the doorway, he frowned harder and turned around to busy himself sorting bottles of pills.

"What's up with him?" inquired Naruto in a whisper. Sasuke's expression was hard. He stared at Naruto for a long time, unblinking.

"How're you doing?" Sasuke demanded. Naruto looked down at his torn clothes.

"Whoa, how'd that happen? Whatever. I'm all patched up so I'm good as new. I've been out for… like… what? Seven hours?" guessed Naruto in his chipper voice. At Sasuke's silence, Naruto's smile faded. He swiveled around to look at the tense lines of Takumi's shoulders before he stared at Sasuke again.

"Not again. That moron," Naruto sighed when the pieces clicked together.

"She's done this for you before?" asked Sasuke. Naruto stood and yanked off the remnants of his shirt. He tossed it in the trash and then twisted around to get a good look at his stomach and back.

"Yeah. I'm guessing I must've been pretty close to dead this time too. Come on." As he spoke, Naruto ducked out of the tent and into camp. It was in the middle of the night so not many people were up. The scorched earth and the remnants of some broken tents were all the proof that remained of the brutal attack. As they passed near the central tent, Naruto noticed two containers covered in seals. He pointed.

"What're those?" he queried. Sasuke barely cast them a glance.

"Danzo's head and his body. We're taking them back to Konoha," Sasuke replied in short words. Naruto's eyes widened.

"Who… got him?" he went on to ask. Something like pride glinted in Sasuke's gaze. A smirk curled up the corner of his mouth.

"Shikamaru caught him with his shadows and I gouged his eyes out. Hyuuga ripped his head off. It was strangely refreshing," said Sasuke with a shrug. Naruto's lips puckered as he surveyed Sasuke. Letting out a short chuckle, Naruto bumped his fist against Sasuke's chest.

"You, my friend, are so hardcore. I wish I could've seen that," he chortled. But they soon sobered up as they remembered why they had been walking in the first place. Even when Sasuke reached out, he could barely feel Sakura's chakra signature. It was weak and watery, so faint that he would have pegged her as a civilian. When they stepped into the clinic, they found it completely empty. The broken remnants of the centrifuge and coffee maker lay scattered across the dusty floor. Someone had ripped a few of the cabinets off the walls and the beds had been flipped over. It was evident that someone had come in here looking to steal and had found nothing.

"Root was looking for her. And her research. Kiyomizu says Sakura packed up everything and sent it off with her summons," Sasuke explained for Naruto's benefit. Naruto shook his head.

"Man, she's going to be pissed. That centrifuge cost a lot of money," commented Naruto as he stepped around the mess. He slowly opened the door to reveal Sakura curled up into a tight ball on the left edge of her spread sleeping bag. With just her bandeau on, she revealed her pale back marred with angry patches of red between her shoulder blades and on her shoulders. Sasuke stared at the finger-shaped marks and then at the occasional hitch in the rise and fall of her chest.

"Ugh, I just woke up but I'm exhausted. You can sleep next to Sakura-chan. She always kicks me in her sleep," Naruto ordered with a grunt. He stepped out for a moment and returned with one of the crisply-folded blankets meant for patients. With a flick of his wrists, he spread the blanket and wrapped it around himself.

"Naruto, what the hell are you doing?" sighed Sasuke as he watched his friend settle in the a corner of the room. The floor was hard but not too uncomfortable.

"Sakura-chan," Naruto interrupted himself with a yawn, "Sakura-chan doesn't like to be alone when she feels crappy." Sasuke was about to scoff at the notion of Sakura needing any amount of coddling. But then he remembered her soft gazes during those long hours struggling over chemical formulas in the clinic. Or that time she had woken at 3 on that snowing night and smiled at him like there was nothing wrong at all even as he watched the regenerating skin peeling off her face. Even earlier today- her broken fingers searching for his and the look of relief when she had felt his hand on her cheek.

Sasuke cleared his throat, as if to clear away those thoughts too. The lingering touches of her hands on his shoulders and the sound of her laugh in his ear felt a little too intimate to be platonic. Leave it to his memory to twist things.

"If she kicks me, we're switching spots," Sasuke finally grumbled. He stepped out of his sandals and shoved them to the side before he lay down. Turning onto his side, he could barely feel the warmth of her back against hers where his shirt rode up. In fact, it felt unnaturally cold. After a moment, he twisted around to lightly touch her arm with the back of his hand. Her skin was cool to the touch. Wondering if this was all part of the process, Sasuke thought to ask Naruto. But Naruto's snore cut him off and Sasuke knew it was useless to try and wake the blond now.

In the dim room, illuminated just a little by the light coming in through the one window, Sasuke looked at Sakura's face again. It wasn't relaxed like Naruto's. Her whole expression was scrunched up and tight and her breaths were shallow.

With another sigh, he pressed his back to hers and went to sleep too.

When Sakura bolted upright in the morning, her tired eyes glanced at Naruto slumped over in the corner. Then she saw Sasuke still curled up next to her. As soon as she had moved, he had begun stirring too. His dark eyelashes lifted, revealing bright red irises. But when he saw that it was just her, the color deepened into sepia. A frown tugged at the corner of his mouth as they stared at one another.

"Go back to sleep," Sasuke grumbled in a croaking voice. Out of habit, she reached up to run her fingers through her hair. It felt like a tangled mess so she didn't even bother to try to tame it. She squinted as she tilted her head back to look out the window. There was already steady sunlight streaming in through it. She stared at that light until it hurt her eyes too much and she had to close them. The sound of Naruto's light snores were soothing and she felt herself drifting again. Sakura let out a deep breath as she lowered herself back onto the sleeping bag. Her shoulders stung as they made contact with something and she hissed a little.

"You stole the blanket," she mumbled. Sasuke let out a grunt as he shifted a little. After a moment, the warm fabric fell onto her shoulder and then settled over her legs. She cracked one eye open and found that Sasuke had just thrown the whole thing on top of her. With a half-laugh, she scooted closer and draped half of the blanket on top of him.

"Stupid. Trying to act cool," muttered Sakura. She heard Sasuke's answering sigh before he moved and pressed his back against hers. The touch of his shirt stung her injuries a little but the heat was admittedly nice.

Three days later, Sakura decided to take the injured home. Due to quick thinking on the other medics' parts, not many people had died. But there were still several others in critical condition and with the equipment in the clinic destroyed, there wasn't much they could do. After a long talk with the captains, Sakura took Ino along with a few healthy men as guards.

"I need you two to stay here. I'm sorry that I can't let you go home yet," said Sakura as she held one of Kei and Takumi's hands each.

"After Danzo was killed, we managed to pick off most of the remaining enemies. Some of them escaped back into the forest so Nara-taichou thinks they must be holing up in a secondary base somewhere. It might get messy. So we'll handle things for you, Sensei," Takumi replied. Smiling fondly, she pressed a kiss to Kei's forehead and then to Takumi's. A roar of outrage rose from the men who had been spying on this exchange.

"Me too, Taichou! I'm staying behind too!" one complained. Raucous laughter rose behind him.

"No way. This is only for the good boys and girls," Sakura responded with a laugh.

They were back in Konoha in five days.

Chouji met them at the gate along with some family and friends of others who had caught wind of their early return. Ino flung herself into Chouji's embrace, her laugh loud and bright. Sakura smiled politely at the people she knew before she slipped away, already running toward the hospital. The nurses looked startled to see her burst in through the doors but were welcoming. Sakura set her backpack in the morgue for safekeeping because no one ever went in there. As soon as she was shrugging on her white coat, staff members were swarming her to update her on things. There were a million patients to be seen, a million forms to be signed.

Tsunade found her the next day.

Because when hadn't her mentor always been able to root her out of this big hospital?

She burst into the small office connected to the research lab in the basement, her hands on her curvy hips and tapping heels echoing ominously. Shizune stood next to her with a similarly stern expression. The overall effect was ruined by the fact that Sakura simply looked up from her coffee with a blank expression. Sitting across from her was Nozomi who was frozen with a piece of sushi held just in front of her mouth.

"You took double shifts. I told you not to take double shifts when you got back. And you were supposed to report in too," Tsunade said as she pointed at Sakura. With her chin propped up in her hand, Sakura nodded. She glanced Nozomi's way and flapped a hand at her, telling her to go on eating. It had been a while since Sakura had had a chance to see her so she had dropped by the lab with some take-out sushi. Nozomi gave the Hokage one last wary look before she bit down on the thin slice of tuna and began chewing.

"I'm taking a break now," Sakura pointed out.

"Sakura, after trauma like that, your body needs to rest. I was against you even coming in for one shift so soon. If you listened to me at all, you'd be at home for the next week eating ice cream in your pajamas," snapped Tsunade. Nozomi's lips pursed in the way they did whenever she heard a juicy tidbit.

"Trauma?" she repeated.

"I'll tell you later," replied Sakura. At this, Nozomi waggled her eyebrows but went on eating. Tsunade let out a sigh.

"Just go home, Sakura. Get some rest. Come back when the weekend's over," Tsunade said.

"But today's Friday. That's two whole days," Sakura huffed. She didn't like the idea of leaving the hospital for so long. At this, Shizune whacked her in the back of the head with her clipboard.

"I've been running things pretty well without your help. I think we can stand to miss you for a couple more days," scolded Shizune. When she sniffed peevishly, Sakura stifled a snort of laughter.

"Alright. But I'm going to be back first thing Monday morning," she relented. Shizune rolled her eyes but she seemed to have expected nothing less. Sending Sakura one last pointed look, Tsunade was off, probably back to her duties as the Hokage. As soon as the door swung shut, Nozomi was shaking Sakura's arm.

"So? Trauma?" she pried. Her dark blue, almost violet eyes glittered. Locks of her curling black hair fell into face that she impatiently brushed away.

"I used… **that**. And my body's not happy with me at the moment," Sakura responded. Nozomi let out a long groan as she shook Sakura's arm again.

"Aw, come on. You used the Divine Palms and I wasn't there to see it **again**? That's just not fair, Sensei. It's like you're doing this on purpose now!" Nozomi whined. With a loud thump, she smacked her forehead down on the table.

"Well, it's only for absolute emergencies so it's not like I can control when people almost die, you know," reasoned Sakura as she nudged her with her elbow. Still sulking, Nozomi lifted her head.

"I know. But that means that Kei-chan and Taku-chan have both seen it and I haven't. Make sure to take me with you next time. Wait, can I see your seal? What does it look like?" The words spilled out of Nozomi. In all her excitement, she was barely able to keep all the syllables from flowing into one another. With a light laugh, Sakura tugged the collar of her shirt down to reveal the mark on her chest. It was completely voided of chakra so the color had shifted from bright blue to black. Over the next few months, she would have to divert small portions of chakra back into the seal until it could be used again. Nozomi marveled at it until Sakura pulled her collar back into place. When she got out of her chair, Nozomi let out a noise of disappointment.

"Sorry, Nozomi. If I don't get my butt out of here soon, Shishou's going to come barreling through that door and punch me home," sighed Sakura.

"Well, thanks for coming to see me. And thanks for lunch, Sensei. I'll see you Monday," Nozomi said with a bright smile. Lifting a hand in farewell, Sakura left the lab, her hands clasped behind her back. She strode down the sterile hallway. Each step sent the sound echoing off the tiles and back at her. The heavy noise was a little disconcerting since she wasn't used to walking around the hospital in her boots.

Sakura ducked into the morgue to pick up her bag and then headed upstairs to the first floor. She clocked out, punching her card and then signing her name in the log book. A few of the nurses waved at her on her way out but otherwise her way home was relatively quiet. Outside, the sun almost blinded her and it took her a few seconds to adjust. Squinting up at the sky, it occurred to Sakura that her fridge was completely empty.

She had called the gas and water companies to have them turn everything back on earlier in the day as she sipped on coffee between patients. The technicians had promised to have everything up and running within a few hours so the promise of a hot shower in her own house was high up on her list of priorities. As she mulled over everything else she had to take care of, Sakura almost didn't notice a very familiar chakra signature among the swirling crowds of people walking down the streets. It was just past noon so there were a lot of people out doing their shopping and running errands. Still, she felt silly for not having noticed this specific person sooner. A hand clapped down on her shoulder and Sakura turned with a smile already brightening her face.

"Sai!" she exclaimed, throwing her arms around him. Sakura had to stand up on her tiptoes to reach and Sai never seemed to grasp this height difference well enough to bend over slightly like Naruto did. Then again, if Sai understood subtle details like that, she supposed he wouldn't really be Sai anymore. So not really minding the stretching, Sakura squeezed him tight for a few seconds before pulling back.

"I stopped by the hospital earlier today but the nurses warned me not to find you. They said you were on a warpath," Sai told her with a hint of confusion. Laughing sheepishly, Sakura shrugged.

"Yeah, I'm pretty anxious to dive back into things. But I've been banned until Monday so I can rest up," she replied. Sai didn't seem surprised by this.

"I heard you and Dickless got into some trouble," he commented as he pointed in the direction of her seal. Tugging a little on his sleeve, Sakura began walking down the street again. Sai fell into step to her left.

"Have you eaten yet? I can tell you all the ugly details over lunch," suggested Sakura. A furrow appeared in Sai's forehead as he considered.

"I haven't. I've been looking for a contractor all morning." It was Sakura's turn to frown.

"Most of the contractors and carpenters are up north repairing the villages and bridges that got messed up in all the fighting. I'd be surprised if there were any still home. What do you even need a contractor for anyway? Do you want to build a wine cellar or something?" she teased with a light elbow to his ribs. But Sai looked dead serious as he glanced at her.

"My roof caved in a few days ago and now there is a rather large hole in it. It would be nice if I could get if fixed soon," he explained.

"…How large? Are we talking a fist or…?" she trailed off at the look on his face.

"I'd say… about half the roof?" estimated Sai.

"…How did that even happen?"

"Water damage, I think. I managed to salvage most of my art. And I taped some plastic sheeting over it for now," he said calmly. Sakura rolled her eyes.

"I told you to get that checked out with the leaking and the buckets before I left," she pointed out. Sai just nodded.

"So, what're you going to do? Nobody's going to be around to fix it for at least a couple months."

"The debris crushed my bed. I've been sleeping on my sofa," he answered. Sakura stopped walking to fix him with an exasperated look.

"Look, Sai. Chances are that the rest of the roof's going to give out at some point. I've got an extra bed up in the attic. You can stay at my place until we figure this out and then I won't have to have nightmares about you being smothered by falling…roof," she stated.

And that was that. Sai was satisfied with the solution and didn't protest.

"I'll pay rent. And we can divide the bills," Sai offered. Sakura shoved him with her hip as they started walking again.

"Help me clean my house and I'll waive first month's rent. I'm almost scared to see how much dust I'm going to find," she countered.

They bought groceries from the stalls in the market and then walked to Sakura's house. As she had expected, there was a layer of dust on everything but it wasn't bad enough to send her into a coughing fit. She dug a large cardboard box out of storage and handed it to Sai who went off to retrieve his belongings from his wreck of a house. While he was gone, Sakura put away groceries. When that was done, she pulled her hair up in a bandana, tied a cloth around her face for a mask, and set about scrubbing the inside of her house clean starting with the kitchen. Flinging the windows open to let air circulate, she dusted everything else with vigor and then scrubbed with sponges and warm soapy water. She swept and mopped through spider webs with a strange sense of satisfaction.

As she stood at the sink wringing out a rag to wipe the floors, Sai walked in through the back door in the kitchen. He dropped the full box on the kitchen table with a loud rattle of paintbrushes and loose weaponry. Not saying anything, Sakura threw him a clean cloth to cover his face too.

Sai ran back forth in the living room running the rag over the floorboards while Sakura made lunch. Well, she dumped ingredients into a pot to make instant udon. As the broth bubbled away on the stove, she whipped up a quick salad to go along with it. They ate quickly and dumped the dishes in the sink for later before they attacked the rest of the house. Sakura tackled her bedroom while Sai dealt with the bathroom. They met up to cleanse her office. They went to the backyard to hang rugs over the clothesline and beat them to get rid of all the gathered dust. Bed sheets went into the washing machine and all the floors were polished until they could practically see their reflections in them. All the while, she let out muffled laughs from behind her mask as they exchanged words and joked around.

By the time they climbed the stairs up to the attic, Sakura was leaning against her broom like it was a walking stick. There was one window that overlooked the front yard. The ceiling beams were high up enough that Sai didn't need to duck to walk. There was one double bed in the corner along with the old wooden dresser she had brought from her parents' house. There was also her old desk with matching wooden chair in the opposite end of the room. There was an old hanging light- the kind with the chain attached that needed to be pulled manually for the fixture to switch on. The standing lamp in the corner was still working too. Overall it wasn't too luxurious but it was by no means a dump.

"I don't think I've ever been up here before," Sai finally said after he had looked all around the attic. Sakura thought for a moment. Naruto had definitely been up here once or twice to help her when she had first moved here when she had turned 18. But not Sai.

"Yeah, I guess not. I can get another lamp if you want. It's kind of dark up here." Sai shook his head.

"This is perfect. Thank you, Sakura. This is… kind beyond necessity," he said as he turned to look at her. Suddenly feeling embarrassed, Sakura loudly cleared her throat.

"What're you thanking me for, you loser? I'm not gonna let one of my best friends sleep out on the street," she grumbled. And before she could get too embarrassed, she shoved the broom into Sai's hands and busied herself opening the windows and stripping the bed.

By the time the attic was clean and habitable, Sakura's stomach was growling. While she sat folding sheets and towels in the kitchen, Sai made a quick meal of fried rice. The warm smells of laundry detergent and food mixed together in an odd but pleasant harmony. They ate, they did dishes. Afterwards, they made the bed upstairs and then downstairs in Sakura's room.

Sakura showered while Sai unpacked. And then Sai showered while Sakura unpacked her things and shoved most of the contents of her bag into the laundry basket to be dealt with tomorrow. They collapsed in an undignified heap on the floor of the living room. While the TV droned on in the background, they caught up on each other's lives until they fell asleep just after midnight.

Sakura visited her parents the next day. She dragged Sai along too where he sat awkwardly drinking tea in the living room while Hisako cried from relief and Yuusuke stroked the new scar on her hand sadly.

"Such a shame. You've always had such beautiful hands," he sighed.

"Hey. I'd rather be a scarred shinobi than a dead shinobi. Besides, men don't look at hands anymore, Dad," teased Sakura. Yuusuke choked on his tea while his wife burst into laughter.

"I can see why you're the way you are now," Sai commented when they walked home later. Head tilted to one side, Sakura casted him a questioning look.

"Your parents are very… warm. They love each other very much. And they love you very much," he explained. It was slightly awkward and the strangely textbook words Sai always used made the sentiment sound a little weird as always. But Sakura didn't really mind that. Reaching between them, she grabbed his hand and swung their arms together. Sai's forehead wrinkled as he looked down at their hands and then looked back up at her face. A grin stretched her mouth.

"Careful, Sai. If you keep saying sweet things like that, any girl will fall in love with you," she teased. At this, Sai's frown only deepened.

"I wouldn't worry. You're not really a girl, Ugly," he responded. Sakura gasped when she caught the hint of a smirk curling his mouth. She shoved him with her hip.

"You made a joke!" she exclaimed. Then, bursting into laughter that was almost too loud, she walked home, glad for the warmth of just one of her precious people at her side.

The weeks flowed on. With her ban from the hospital lifted, Sakura dove back into her work. Of course, she could feel that her body was far from being alright. Before her second rotation out on the border, she would sometimes work 36 hours in a row before collapsing in bed. On those occasions, her body would be exhausted but it was nothing a solid night's sleep couldn't fix. But now, just one shift was enough to make her want to sob. The standard 9 to 5 grated on her until it was all she could do to totter home and make it onto the sofa. That first day back in Konoha, she had been running on caffeine and soldier pills but she knew she wouldn't be able to handle that kind of abuse in her state. Twice, Sai had found her lying in the foyer sleeping.

"That doesn't seem very comfortable," he observed the first time, standing in the doorway.

"I just want to crawl into a hole and die," she groaned.

And because only Sai would be able to accept this as a normal response, he helped her to her feet and half-dragged her to her bed.

Sakura had to limit herself. There was a time when she had slept in the morgue, refusing to leave the hospital at all. But now she clocked in during the morning and left before sundown. The more room she gave her systems to heal, the faster she would be back up to full capacity. She took a day off once a week and spent one hour less in her study at home and spent one hour extra sleeping.

It really helped to have Sai around. The Intelligence Division had recruited him not long after Sakura had left last year. He was the only person around who really understood anything about Danzo and the rest of Root's operations. He had spent a lot of time with Morino Ibiki and Yamanaka Inoichi working strategy and supplying information. Now that Danzo was dead, Sai had expected to be let go. Instead, Ibiki had offered him a permanent position. His training with Root made him rather comfortable with the methods of interrogation often required.

"Are you going to take it?" Sakura asked upon hearing the news one day in April. They sat together on the couch with a tub of ice cream set between them. Sai took another spoonful with a thoughtful expression.

"I'm considering. The pay's good and I don't dislike the people. It's mostly a desk job, though. There isn't a need to extract information every day, after all," he replied. Sakura nodded as she licked her spoon clean. She put her feet up on the coffee table and waggled her toes as she thought.

"You could always go back to ANBU. I heard from some senpai that at the end of a war, a lot of the remaining ANBU retire or transfer into different departments. They'd need experienced people like you," she offered. As she spoke, she rubbed at the tattoo on her right arm. The ink had lightened a bit but it was by no means faded.

"The Hokage promotes a lot of people into ANBU during times like this. Something like that would be expected," Sai agreed.

"Ah, she would be pissed if she found out how lax we've been about the masks. I mean, we all know each other's faces and names. What happened to all the codes about secrecy?" she suddenly remembered. At this, Sai stared at her.

"Sakura, your hair is pink. It's not exactly suited for secrecy," he responded, completely serious. She shot him a dirty look but didn't say anything, mostly because she knew he was right.

"That aside," Sai went on, "I'd always thought I'd have to be by Naruto's side when he becomes Hokage. So ANBU wouldn't be a bad choice." That made Sakura smile.

"Yeah, that blockhead's going to need to surround himself with the right people. I'd feel better with you there to watch his ass," Sakura said.

"You'd be there too. All three of us."

"Four of us," she corrected on reflex. But then she wondered. She knew that Shikamaru would vouch for Sasuke and that would mean that he had fulfilled the first part of his bargain with Tsunade. Then there was the matter of how long his house arrest and chakra sealing would last. That wasn't something Tsunade could really be lenient about. And from the way the older woman scowled at the mere mention of Sasuke's name, Sakura had the feeling that leniency was not something Tsunade necessarily wanted for him anyway.

"Do you hate Sasuke, Sai?" Sakura suddenly inquired. Sai looked up as he thought, as if the words would be written into the ceiling.

"…I dislike him for putting you and Naruto through so much pain. I don't dislike his personality though. I understand why he did what he did," responded Sai slowly as he chose his words. With a sigh, Sakura dropped her spoon into the ice cream. It fell with an empty clunk. Then her head drooped to rest against Sai's right shoulder.

"You've got a good heart, Sai. A big heart," she muttered.

"Not particularly. You're the one that forgave him. It's easy to forgive someone who's never hurt you directly before," answered Sai so frankly that Sakura found herself smiling again. They were quiet for a long while. Sakura pulled her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them.

"I haven't really forgiven him, Sai. I just sort of… got tired of being mad all the time. It's really easy to stay mad at someone you love." They were silent again.

"Kind of like how you're always mad at Naruto and me," he finally responded.

"Yeah. Like that." And with those soft words, Sakura closed her eyes and let herself fall asleep against Sai's shoulder.

* * *

><p>As soon as they set foot in the village, Naruto was dragging Sasuke to eat ramen. They had to report in to the Hokage but since it was nearly 1 am, that would have to wait until morning. Instead, they sat side by side at the counter eating until Naruto had managed to gulp down three bowls.<p>

"Just three. I've got to watch my dainty figure," chuckled Naruto as he patted his stomach.

Sasuke didn't have an insult for that. He was busy breathing in the steam of fresh broth and the powdery smell of handmade noodles. There were some customers scattered around quietly conversing over tiny cups of sake. Naruto stood, dropping his money onto the countertop. Sasuke copied him, ignoring the few stares spared his way when his chair scraped across the wood floor.

"Thanks, Old Man! It was great!" Naruto hollered to the owner who had just slipped into the kitchen. After a couple seconds, Teuchi's head popped out. He waved a ladle at them.

"Good to see you boys again. Bring Sakura-chan next time!" replied Teuchi with a smile. The plural startled Sasuke. He hadn't expected the old man to remember him after all these years. Lifting a hand in greeting, Sasuke ducked past the fabric panels after Naruto.

"Next, we should go see Sakura-chan. She might still be awake," Naruto said. With his arms crossed behind his head, Naruto strolled on down the dim street. Sasuke lingered for a few seconds. The street lights were new along with a couple shops he didn't recognize. The last time he had been in Konoha, he had been accosted by guards and dragged immediately to the Hokage. The remainder of his stay, he had been confined to a cramped prison cell under the Hokage Tower. So it was safe to say that he hadn't had a chance to have a grand tour of the village.

Sasuke noticed the direction Naruto was heading in and he frowned.

"Sakura lives that way," Sasuke called out. When Naruto swiveled on his heel, Sasuke pointed south. For a moment, Naruto looked confused. And then his expression lightened with understanding.

"Ah, yeah. Her parents still live there. But Sakura-chan moved a few years back to be closer to the hospital. She's over this way now. It's only a few minutes," Naruto told him.

And to be fair, Sakura's place was maybe ten minutes from the ramen restaurant. When Naruto stopped, Sasuke was a little surprised. It was a small one-story house with white siding and a light brown roof. There was a black metal fence out front and the name 'Haruno' was written in kanji on a sign next to the mailbox. It was a surprisingly nice place in a good part of the village. Naruto flipped the latch up and pushed the gate open. They followed the stone path leading up to the door. The walkway was lined with brightly-colored flowers and lush bushes.

Sasuke put his hands in his pockets, waiting for Naruto to knock on the door. Instead, he heard the jingle of a key ring. To his surprise, Naruto rooted through his keys until he found a silver one and stuck it in the lock. He held the door open for Sasuke who stared at him.

"Why do you have the keys to Sakura's house?" asked Sasuke, unable to comprehend what he had just seen. Naruto's eyebrows rose.

"Huh? She has the key to my place too. And Sai has one. If you ask nicely she might give you a copy too," replied Naruto as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Shaking his head at his friends' strangeness, Sasuke stepped into the house after Naruto. He left his shoes in the foyer, noting that there was already a set of men's sandals there. But he had sensed the second chakra signature long before they had set foot in the house. Completely unashamed, Naruto trotted down the hall and into the living room on the right.

"Stupid, what are you staring at?" Sasuke sighed as he caught up to him. He fell silent too as he saw Sakura curled up on the sofa. She was leaning against Sai who had a kunai held in his left hand. When he saw who the intruders were, he put his hand back between the sofa cushions where he had undoubtedly hidden the weapon in the first place. All the while, Sakura didn't stir. Her cheek was resting against the hollow of Sai's shoulder and her bare legs were tucked up underneath her. The oversized t-shirt she wore was obviously a man's.

"Sai, you weak fool," Naruto said flatly.

"What?" Sasuke and Sai asked at the same time.

"No matter how attractive Sakura-chan is, how could you lay a hand on her like that? We trusted you," stated Naruto in a grave voice. Sai and Sasuke, despite the fact that they had barely interacted before, exchanged looks of absolute exasperation. And in a way, this was what cemented their friendship in the future.

"And she's even wearing your shirt. Is this how you mark them as yours, Sai? Does that make you satisfied?" Naruto continued. Sai's stare drifted to him now.

"I mean, I'm a man too so I understand that we all have urges but-"

"Naruto, shut uuuup. You're so loud," whined Sakura to interrupt her friend's impassioned rant.

"Sakura-chan! This is indecent! Doing it in the living room… even Hinata-chan and I haven't tri-"

Mercifully, Sakura interrupted him again by flinging a throw pillow at his face. Pulling herself upright, she glowered around at all three of them.

"What the hell are you even talking about? This shirt is yours, you idiot," she growled. To prove her point, she turned around to reveal the big spiral on the back. Naruto blinked.

"Huh? Why're you wearing my shirt, Sakura-chan?" he inquired. Sakura slumped back against the sofa again. She rubbed at her eyes with the palms of her hands.

"I don't have any clean shirts to wear at home. What're you two even doing here?" she sighed.

"My apartment doesn't have electricity or water and Sasuke doesn't have a place to stay. We'll sleep in the attic, okay?" Naruto said, already moving toward the stairs.

"You can't. That's Sai's room now," Sakura called after him.

"Why's Sai staying here?" demanded Naruto as he turned to examine them both.

"My roof collapsed," answered Sai.

"Oh."

And so that was how it was decided that everyone would be sleeping in the living room. Because Sakura protested to Sasuke and Naruto roughing it out by themselves on the couch and the floor while Naruto was against either of them taking up beds. While they bickered, Sai went into the linen closet down the hall and gathered up a bunch of blankets. As the arguing continued, Sai returned and dropped the pile on top of the two of them. Sasuke, sitting on the couch, couldn't hide his smile.

"Problem solved. Although you two could stand to take a shower," stated Sai in that matter-of-fact voice signature to him.

"Good idea. Sakura-chan do I have any other shirts here? All of my stuff's dirty as hell," Naruto said while yanking his shirt off. He headed down the hall, hooking his thumb into the waistband of his pants as he went. Now lying on the sofa while Sai and Sasuke moved the coffee table to the side and spread the blankets down on top of the rug, Sakura thought for a second.

"Yeah, check my bottom drawer. Get something for Sasuke too," she yelled. And then she turned to the side in time to meet Sasuke's searching gaze.

"What's wrong?" she immediately asked. Her eyes flitted to Sai once and something passed between them. Not even bothering to make an excuse, Sai quietly walked off into the kitchen, leaving Sasuke and Sakura alone. They could hear the splash of water hitting tiles in the bathroom while Naruto showered.

"You all seem close," was all he answered. Sakura frowned.

"Yeah. Of course we are," she slowly said. She waited but Sasuke didn't elaborate his comment with anything else. Rolling her eyes, she grasped his wrist, drawing his gaze again.

"I don't know what's up with you right now but stop it. You're home. And we're all really glad you're here. Now stop being a cryptic asshole, Sasuke-kun," Sakura stated in a firm voice. Her words would have been cutting were it not for the sincerity shining out of her eyes. Her fingers were surprisingly strong, refusing to release his wrist until he finally nodded. It was only then that she was smiling again.

"Seriously. Welcome home, Sasuke-kun. I missed you," she added. It was a strange moment, sort of frozen in itself, not really moving forward or backward. Maybe something else would have come from it had Naruto not bounded out of the shower and lobbed some clothes at the side of Sasuke's head.

"Shower's yours, bastard," Naruto crowed. And looking at the glower on Sasuke's face, Sakura burst into laughter.

That night, Sakura slept truly peacefully for the first time in a month. Even though Naruto snored a little and Sai had a tendency to mumble in his sleep, she felt secure. With Naruto sprawled out on his back and Sai kicking him a little to shove him away, she almost felt like she was a Chunin again. But then she felt Sasuke next to her, his arm tucked under his head and his back to everyone as he lay on his side.

Finally closing her eyes, Sakura dreamed faceless dreams of swirling colors.

* * *

><p>Excuse the flimsy little ending to the chapter but otherwise this would have gone on for another 1000 words. Anyway, with Sasuke finally home, looks like Team 7's got a lot of crap to deal with. As always, thanks for reading and I always really appreciate every single review you guys leave for me even if I don't always have the time to answer them.<p> 


	9. Wisteria

Entropy

Chapter 9: Wisteria

The disparity between the noise inside the walls of the hospital and outside of the walls was almost comical. The birds chirped sweetly outside and the villagers passing by would call out their cheerful "hello" and "how's your family doing". But as soon as she slipped past those glass doors, pure sound assaulted her ears. Telephones ringing, babies shrieking, and beds rattling down the hallway on their wheels almost made her want to turn right around and leave.

"Sensei! Haruno-sensei! I-" one of the trainees called as she ran up to meet her. Sakura held a hand up as she began striding through reception and down the hallway. The girl silently followed Sakura's every step with wide eyes glittering with adoration.

"Morning, Sakura-sensei!"

"Good morning, Haruno-sensei!" various nurses and medics called out as she passed. It was only when Takumi walked up holding a cup of coffee that Sakura spoke.

"Bless you, wonderful, fabulous child," she sighed after she had taken a sip of life-giving elixir. They resumed walking at the same brisk pace, Takumi handing Sakura a clipboard as they moved. He knew from experience that she would not be in the mood for socialization without some caffeine in her blood.

"These are the most priority patients we've had since yesterday. The rest we've divided up among the staff like you requested," he explained. Sakura flipped through the files to skim the basic facts. Since the return of the ANBU a few days ago, the hospital, already packed with injuries, was now overflowing with patients. She had been forced to patch up the more minor cases and send them home for bed rest. Letting out a sigh, Sakura glanced over at Takumi.

His hair had grown out at the border and now he held it back in a little ponytail. He was taller than he had been before leaving for his rotations. But his face didn't show signs of acute exhaustion. He was at the hospital before she was and left late in the morning to get some sleep, returning just at the tail end of the night shift. He was better at juggling his personal health with those of patients than she was. Sighing again, Sakura pulled the bottom file off the stack to hand to him.

"You can handle this one. Just patch his organs up and set the bones. We'll leave them to heal naturally. We don't have enough chakra to spare right now," she instructed. Just as she finished speaking, Sakura heard quick footsteps approaching. She and Takumi paused in time for Kei to stride up from the direction of the ER in the west wing.

"Good morning, Sensei. Takumi-kun. I thought I heard your voices," she greeted them with a smile.

"Ah, good timing, Kei. I want you to help out Takumi with this patient and then I want you to accompany me on my rounds later," Sakura stated. With a nod, Kei looked down at her wristwatch.

"That's strange, I haven't seen Nozomi-chan around this morning. She's usually up here complaining by now," Kei remarked. It was indeed unusual not to see the bubbly girl with curls flitting around. She had a keen sense of knowing exactly when Sakura arrived in the hospital each morning. But as if speaking about her summoned her, there was the loud tap of high heels in the hallway. Exchanging smiles, the trio waited for Nozomi to join them. Hands in the pockets of her white lab coat, Nozomi ran up and butted her forehead against Sakura's arm.

"Haru-haru-sensei, half the staff hasn't showed up at research this morning," she whined.

"It can't be helped. They're out in Sound dismantling the research labs there," Sakura patiently reminded her. Nozomi straightened with a huff.

"Ignore her, Sensei. Nozomi-chan's just annoyed because that Aburame hottie in toxicology isn't here," Kei interrupted. Nozomi flushed bright red as she swatted at Kei. Sakura arched her eyebrows.

"Is that so? Well, next time when I need data or new herbs, I'll be sure to send the two of you together," promised Sakura. Shaking his head with embarrassment, Takumi looked determined to act as if he didn't know the three of them. Nozomi glowered for a moment and then her expression softened.

"…Really?" she tentatively asked. Sakura gave her a wink and that seemed assurance enough.

"By the way, Sensei, what's this?" inquired Kei, pointing at the mousy little girl still following them. Sakura started.

"Oh, sorry, I completely forgot about you. What do you need?" asked Sakura.

"Um… I'm currently still in training but I was wondering if I could shadow you for today?" the girl timidly requested.

"Well, I'll be in surgery for most of the day but you're welcome to come and observe," Sakura replied after some thought.

"Aw, Sensei, you're a big softie now. I remember when we were still in training, you told us not to bother you," Nozomi grumbled half-jokingly. Smacking Nozomi in the butt with her clipboard, Sakura shooed her back off to the lab. She sent Kei and Takumi running off too so they could get to work.

After a simple appendectomy and a few hours of knee surgery, Sakura shed her bloodied scrubs and was back in her regular clothes. The little trainee had excused herself a few minutes into the first surgery. Sakura made a note to herself that if that girl made it through the program, to place her in research where she wouldn't be near a scalpel. After lunch, she made rounds with Kei, checking in on patients and comforting nervous families. When she had just finished her afternoon coffee break, Sakura walked up to the reception area to chat with the nurses and was met with an unexpected but completely welcome sight.

"Hey! Sakura-chan!"

She turned around mid-sentence and saw Naruto striding up to her. He enveloped her in a big hug that surprisingly didn't reek of sweat for once. Normally he stumbled in to visit her after some vicious spar with a dumb injury like a dislocated shoulder or a broken hand. Sasuke followed after, his eyes carefully analyzing the room and all its exits before they slid to her. Disengaging herself from Naruto, Sakura gave Sasuke a smile.

"What's up, you two coming around here?" she asked, leaning her hip against the reception desk. Naruto held up a letter with a threatening red stamp on it.

"All ANBU personnel returning from duty are required to get a physical upon their return. This is the last day we can get it done before the old lady throws us out the window of her office," he explained with a sheepish grin.

"Okay. Naruto, I understand. But Sasuke, why're you here so late? I always thought you were punctual," Sakura teased half-seriously. Sasuke fixed her with a scowl and then he shoved his hands in his pockets.

"I don't like hospitals," he muttered in response.

"That aside, Sakura, what are you wearing?" demanded Naruto. Sakura looked down at herself and then at Naruto.

"Oh, this? This fabric's fire-retardant and tear-resistant. I snagged a sample from my friend in Weapons Development. Pretty cool, huh?" she said as she plucked at the fabric of her black dress under her coat. It was a stretchy and surprisingly thick material that hugged her body snugly. The round neckline revealed her collarbones but was modest enough to cover her chest. It was sleeveless and ended mid-thigh, ensuring maximum mobility. The outfit was paired with a pair of black high heels. Though they weren't the most comfortable, Tsunade had once pointed out to her that having a doctor that looked professional helped reassure a lot of patients. The gel inserts under her soles helped cushion her feet and that seemed to hold her over until she made it home each night.

"I like the sexy doctor look but I kind of miss the badass doctor in shinobi attire too," Naruto commented after some observation. Sakura rolled her eyes as she twisted her hair up and stuck a pen in it to hold everything in place. Crossing her arms over her chest, Sakura tapped her clipboard against her thigh. She glanced up at the clock over the reception desk and then looked at her friends. Sakura leaned over the counter to confer quietly with one of the nurses who wheeled back in her chair to the walls of patient files in the back. After a moment of rummaging, she returned with two manila folders marked with colored tabs. These were the general medical files Konoha had for the two of them. The classified information was stored in locked cabinets back in Sakura's office but these would do for now. Lifting them into her arms, Sakura thanked the nurse, and then turned back to her friends.

"Alright. Come with me," Sakura finally ordered as she started down and the hall and pushed open the doors leading into a stairwell. When they climbed, Sakura chatted happily with Naruto about their friends and all the things that had happened since she had seen him three days ago when he and Sasuke had shown up unannounced in the middle of the night.

Sakura had woken up when Naruto had rolled on top of her and she had shoved him off with her foot. Grumbling to herself, she crawled into the kitchen to make breakfast and more importantly, coffee. Hair mussed and eyes barely opened, she cracked eggs into the frying pan with one hand while sipping coffee with the other. When a wide yawn stretched her mouth, Sai walked in, his forehead wrinkled.

"Naruto tried to spoon me," he grunted. A tired snigger of a laugh left her.

"Were you the big spoon or the little spoon?" she asked. Sai shuffled to the fridge to pull out a carton of milk.

"Little. I find that I don't enjoy the sensation of morning wood between my butt cheeks," Sai confessed so frankly that Sakura laughed again. When she looked back, Sakura found Sasuke walking into the kitchen as he scratched at his wild mane of hair. Squinting in the morning sunlight filtering in through the window above the sink, he gave a nod in greeting. He sank into a chair, letting his head slump back.

"Ah, Mr. Low Blood Pressure. Coffee?" she greeted him with sympathy. An incoherent grumble left Sasuke's mouth. It was funny to see how differently he slept here compared to at the border. With his closed eyes and lolling head, it was sort of cute to see him completely unguarded. And part of her was touched, too. Sasuke sleeping through the night and puttering about all groggy meant that he trusted them. Feeling a little giddy at the thought, Sakura walked past him to get to the fridge and mussed his hair on the way. Letting out another groan, he cracked open an eye to stare at her.

"What?" he demanded in a gruff voice.

"Nothing," Sakura innocently replied. She sliced up ham and dropped it into the frying pan. It sizzled in its own juices, filling the kitchen with the heavenly aroma of meat. Naruto stumbled in to join them a moment later, rubbing at his sore back wonderingly. Sakura had no doubt that there would be a bruise in the shape of Sai's foot there in an hour or so. Naruto put his chin on her shoulder to peek down at the frying pan like a little kid. Sai sat at the table next to Sasuke, sliding a mug of coffee toward him along with the sugar bowl. Sasuke grunted his thanks.

They gathered around the round wooden table, swapping out plates of fried eggs and thick slices of ham. Sasuke looked at Sakura and Naruto like they were crazy when they slathered their slices of toast with condensed milk. There was plenty of coffee being poured between Sakura and Sai. Naruto stuck with milk, earning a little teasing from Sakura about still being a child. Sasuke drank from a cup, not really caring what was going into his mouth at this point.

Thinking back to that morning, it always struck Sakura that it was the first time all four of them had been together in Konoha. She had imagined dozens of scenarios over the years. One of them involved beating Sasuke into a bloody pulp into the ground and Sai eventually pulling her off him while Naruto dragged Sasuke to the hospital to save his life. Others involved her giving Sasuke the cold shoulder and never speaking to him ever again.

But this was much simpler.

Sasuke was her friend. Naruto was her friend. Sai was her friend. Friends slept over at her house and woke up to have breakfast in the morning. And that was all there was to it. It was a lot less messy than she had expected, but it was a fitting reunion for them all, she decided as she stirred sugar into her coffee.

After eating, Naruto had used Sakura's phone to call the power and water companies about his apartment. Then he and Sasuke were off while Sai did dishes and Sakura got ready for work.

And now, three days later, Sakura sat Sasuke down on a little bench next to an examination room on the second floor.

"Let me deal with you first," Sakura said, steering Naruto into the examination room by the shoulders. She shut the door; Naruto pulled off his shirt and plopped down on the cushioned table. The crackle of the paper on top always irritated him but he didn't complain this time.

"So, how did the hearing go?" inquired Sakura as she opened up Naruto's heavy file and plopped it down on the side table.

The hearing regarding Sasuke's sentence had been a quiet, private affair. Only people directly involved were permitted to attend, though they all knew it was specifically to ban Sakura. The elders knew she would have probably picked up a chair and beaten them to death with it during the proceedings. Naruto was only allowed in the room as Sasuke's superior officer and promptly kicked out after giving his testimony. Shikamaru, along with Kiba, were there too. Sakura suspected that upon reading mission reports, Tsunade had specifically chosen those two to speak on Sasuke's behalf. Despite all her muttering and grumbling when it came to Sasuke, the Hokage seemed to be rooting for him too.

"Ah, well, bringing back Danzo's head on a stick, literally, softened up the old bats. The other Kages were happy about it too. Six months grounded in the village with a chakra limiter and then a two-year period where he can leave the village but not alone. Pretty generous since he tried to kill the Kages the last time he saw them," Naruto told her. But Sakura didn't let her breath out just yet. Naruto caught the furrow between her eyebrows with a chuckle.

"And in light of the evidence brought forth by both you and Baa-chan, we're holding a thorough investigation on Konoha's involvement in the Uchiha massacre," he finished. Letting out a profound sigh of relief, Sakura sagged forward to hug Naruto. They squeezed each other tightly, more than relief passing between them. It was a deeper feeling, one that spanned across 10 years of friendship and disappointment and deep love.

Smacking Naruto's bare back, Sakura pulled away.

"Alright. Time for your physical. Lose the pants, keep the boxers," she ordered. When she turned and began snapping on gloves, Naruto snorted.

"Are you going to ask me to turn my head and cough, Sensei?" he asked. Turning around, she pulled another latex glove out of the box and snapped it against his arm.

"No. But if you don't shut up, I'll get Tsunade-shishou to come in here and do it for me," Sakura warned. They stared at each other, both imagining the ridiculous and horrifying scenario before they burst into raucous laughter.

When Naruto left the room half an hour later, he bumped his fist against Sasuke's shoulder.

"Sakura-chan saw me naked," Naruto bragged childishly with a wink. The disgust etched across Sasuke's face was mirrored by Sakura as she braced her hands on the doorframe and dealt a swift kick to Naruto's rear. It wasn't enough to hurt him. The force only sent him stumbling out of the way.

"Come on, Sasuke. The only way I can bully him out of here is if I can kick you out too. Let's get this over with," said Sakura, beckoning him inside. Smirking, Sasuke got to his feet and slipped into the small exam room. Naruto followed after them, his grin still in place.

"Ew, Sasuke's stripping in front of me, Mommy," Naruto hooted when Sasuke began shedding his shirt. Normally his overly ridiculous attitude would have irritated Sakura. But in light of the good news he had just given her, she found that she was more than tolerant of it.

"Yes, yes. Mommy knows how much you want to see Sasuke naked but you'll just have to buy him dinner first," she calmly replied, patiently pushing Naruto out of the room.

"Huh? What? No I don't! Gross, Sakura!" the blond complained. Laughing, she shut the door on his face. She could still hear Naruto chuckling through the wood. When she turned, it was to face Sasuke in black boxer briefs sitting on the exam table. His shirt and pants were folded and stacked in a neat pile beside him. It crossed her mind that Sasuke's body was beautiful, of course. But this was no time to be hot and bothered. Besides, she lived in a shinobi village. What man walked in for a check-up with anything less than a six-pack?

"You've gained weight," she noted as she picked up his file and shut Naruto's.

"Are you calling me fat?" he asked. Sakura chomped down on her lower lip to keep from smiling but failed miserably. Sasuke's jokes were rare and unexpected. And maybe it was this rarity that always made his dry remarks effective on her. She took a few steps toward him until she was standing directly in front of him.

"Considering you were underweight the last time you had a physical, yes. You're nice and tubby now," replied Sakura as she patted his stomach. She stood there, noting a few things about his physical appearance in her notes. Her pen paused when she felt a tug on the front of her white coat.

"It suits you," Sasuke stated. Their eyes met and she smiled.

"Thanks," she responded.

"Haruno-sensei, are you with a patient right now? I need you to sign off on the order for hypodermic needles," a nurse called through the door.

"Ah, just come in. I'll sign it real quick," Sakura called back. There was a pause and then the door opened. The young nurse froze. Sakura stared at her, wondering what could possibly be wrong. When she looked back at Sasuke, he fixed her with a bored stare paired with a shrug.

"The form?" Sakura prompted. As she held out her hand, the nurse started sharply. Quickly pushing the papers over, the nurse continued to look back and forth nervously between the two.

"Is anything the matter, nurse?" inquired Sakura while scanning numbers and signing on dotted lines.

"It's just, I'm sorry I interrupted," she quietly answered.

"Huh?" Sakura demanded, head rising sharply. With a tentative finger, the nurse pointed at Sasuke still holding on to the edge of her white coat. At this, Naruto, peeking into the room with a nosy expression, began roaring with mirth.

"What happened to having to buy Sasuke dinner first, Sakura?" Naruto guffawed. Cheeks tinged faintly pink, Sakura sniffed proudly.

"Hey, I made him pork cutlets once, remember? Now, out; both of you," Sakura ordered. She shoved the forms at the nurse and then pushed the two intruders away. Shutting the door, she locked it this time. With the muffled sound of Naruto's laughter outside, Sakura pressed her back to the door.

"Does that happen to you a lot?" inquired Sasuke.

"…Well… come to think of it, once. Kiba came to drop off flowers and one of the nurses walked in on me giving him a thank you kiss. What a bunch of gossips," Sakura recalled with exasperation.

"Whatever. They'll have something new to jabber about. Have you been experiencing any headaches lately?" Sakura moved on, reading the first bullet on the standard questionnaire for check-ups.

"Other than you and Naruto, no," Sasuke solemnly responded. Sakura smacked his arm with her clipboard.

"You are just full of jokes today," she said with a shake of her head. Their eyes met and she could see the wry amusement glittering in his gaze.

So this was the Uchiha Sasuke she had never gotten to know before.

* * *

><p>A few days later, rolling out of bed on Saturday morning, Sakura realized that her bangs were seriously in her way. Stumbling into the shower, she resolved to go visit the only salon she trusted: the kitchen of Ino's house. Sai was still sleeping after a round of drinking with Naruto and some of the guys the night before. She left the coffee maker warming the rest of the coffee for him and then pulled on some presentable clothes. Still yawning, Sakura walked to Ino's place, stretching her arms and shoulders on the way. She stopped by the bakery to pick up some fruit tarts.<p>

When she arrived in the Yamanaka district, Sakura cut through the relatively quiet streets to the familiar house. She walked around to the back door to knock twice. Ino's mother answered, a smile already on her face when she saw who it was.

"Sakura-chan, come in! What a surprise! I haven't seen you in a long time," she greeted, ushering Sakura in. She accepted the box of pastries as Sakura slipped out of her sandals.

"Oh, thank you for these. Ino should be down in a bit. I just called her down for breakfast. Have you eaten, dear?" Mrs. Yamanaka said, guiding Sakura to a chair. Ino bounced down the stairs a few minutes later, still in her pajamas. When she saw Sakura, she looked a little dubious until she saw that a peace offering of fruit tarts had been brought over as well. Mrs. Yamanaka, as considerate as ever, excused herself to do laundry, leaving Sakura and Ino to talk.

"You here so early in the morning can only mean one of two things: you're here to share steamy details about last night or you need a haircut," Ino guessed as she bit into the flaky crust of a tart. Sakura held up two fingers and Ino's lips twisted with disappointment.

"Ugh, get a boyfriend already, Sakura. I haven't had any decent girl-talk with you since you broke up with Kiba," Ino sighed.

"I'm glad you're living vicariously through the nasty details of my sex life, Ino," Sakura replied with a wry smile. At this, Ino waggled her eyebrows.

"Nasty? Really? Who is it?" she grilled with a devious look. Sakura shoved another fruit tart into Ino's mouth and mimed zipping her lips shut. Grumpily chewing, Ino let the topic go. They chatted a little longer, updating one another about each other's families. Sakura asked how things were going with Chouji and the stupid grin on Ino's face answered it all. Feeling just a little pang of jealousy, Sakura smiled.

"You're a really lucky girl, Ino. I don't think anybody can take care of you the way Chouji-kun will," she said so sincerely that the words almost hurt to say. Her flighty friend, her first friend. The idea of her marrying the still slightly chubby man with a big appetite and a steadfast smile seemed like a good match.

"Right? Only I could snag a secret cutie like that. Anyway, what're we going to do with that mop on top of your head?" Ino said, clapping her hands together. She wetted Sakura's hair in the sink and then sat her down in a folding chair in the middle of the kitchen. As Ino moved around combing through Sakura's hair and mumbling to herself, Sakura had a sudden thought.

"Ino-chan," Sakura called. Ino tilted Sakura's head back and picked up her scissors.

"Hmm? What's with the 'chan'? You need to borrow money or something?" replied Ino. As Ino began snipping through locks of pink hair, Sakura let out a deep breath.

"I slept with Hyuuga Neji," Sakura announced. The cutting stopped. There was silence. Just when Sakura began to wonder if her friend was alright, Ino was pulling Sakura's bangs out of her face to stare at her.

"Whoa. Seriously?" Ino demanded. Sakura nodded once.

"Like once?"

Sakura shook her head.

"When? Yesterday?"

Another shake of her head.

Ino's mouth puckered as she scowled.

"…We ended about a year ago, right before I left for my rotation. We had a thing for a month or two," Sakura admitted. Ino hummed.

"That's why I was getting seriously weird vibes from the two of you out at the border. I couldn't tell if he wanted to throw you against the nearest table or if you wanted to throw him into the nearest pile of broken glass," Ino commented. They both laughed at that. Certainly nothing had been wrong about the physical aspect of the relationship. The trouble was, Sakura wasn't sure if it could actually be called a relationship.

"It was a sort of mutual pity fuck. Tenten had just gotten engaged and I was just… well… me," Sakura elaborated. Ino let the wet hair flop back into Sakura's face and she went back to cutting.

"Girl, there's nothing wrong with you," Ino reminded her a little gruffly and really lovingly.

"I know. But it's like you told me that night I broke up with Kiba. I have this perpetual fear that any guy that gets too close will break me into a million pieces," Sakura reminded her. There was no response. There was just the scissors snipping through hair.

"I don't blame you. Look what happened with Sasuke," Ino half-muttered. Sakura scoffed.

"It wasn't a relationship, Ino. That was just a crush," argued Sakura.

"Bullshit it wasn't. Any time two people are connected, it's a relationship. You and me, we've got a relationship," snapped Ino. At this, Sakura scoffed again, louder this time.

"Is this a way for you to ask me to seduce you, Ino?" Sakura asked.

"You wish, Forehead," Ino shot back just as smoothly. But then Ino's voice sobered right back up again.

"Anyway, Sakura, when you deal with people, you always give 1000% of yourself. So Sasuke pushing you away the way he did hurt you more than it would hurt anyone else. I don't get why you even talk to the shit. I still think you should break his jaw a couple times," continued Ino in mostly a growl. Her fingers tilted Sakura's head slightly to the right before they took up the scissor again.

"Ino, we were talking about Neji. Why did it suddenly change to Sasuke?" laughed Sakura. She blinked when Ino pushed her bangs back and suddenly opened up her view of the kitchen again. Still scowling fiercely, Ino snipped pieces of the bangs off.

"Because, while it's a close match, Sasuke's hotter than Neji is," Ino ground out.

"Stupid," Sakura chuckled. And Ino's frown slowly morphed into a smile. She flapped her hand for Sakura to continue her story.

"So… things ended pretty ugly with Neji. And I feel bad about it. He's really not such a jerk. We just sort of met up at a bad point. But when I see his face I get so mad that I can't really talk… nicely, you know?" Sakura blurted out, spilling all the angry, ugly frustrations that had been building up for a while. Sakura was a people person. Not getting along with anyone bothered her.

Sakura's head jerked back when Ino suddenly raked her fingers through her hair, ruffling it.

"Sakura, you know when I dated that civilian for a while and I found out he was cheating on me?" Ino asked as she began layering the hair she had just cut. Sakura made an affirmative noise in the back of her throat.

"And I kept saying I wasn't mad and I tried to act all mature until I saw him one day and I flipped out and head-butted him in the middle of the street?" Ino went on. Stifling a laugh, Sakura made the noise again.

"Don't do what I did. You're obviously upset right now and you have a right to be. But he's probably not happy either. You might as well both be mad and talk about how mad you both are," concluded Ino. Mulling over those words, Sakura thought carefully.

"…Are you sure I can't head-butt him?" Sakura finally asked.

"Only if I'm there to watch," Ino replied. She ducked off to the bathroom for a second and was back with a hand mirror. Sakura grasped the handle and lifted it up to get a look at her hair. Ino hadn't really taken much length off it- maybe an inch or so. She had thinned out Sakura's bangs though and layered a lot so her head felt significantly lighter.

"Thanks, Piggy. I'll put it on my tab," said Sakura when she handed the mirror back. Ino rolled her eyes.

"I'll consider the fruit tarts my payment," Ino replied.

* * *

><p>Once things had really settled down, about a month or so after Naruto and the others had come home, Sakura found out that Sasuke couldn't find a place to live. There were enough apartments and houses up for rent but as soon as people found out who was asking, those vacancies suddenly disappeared. It seemed that while there many people who knew the truth, there were still more who believed Sasuke was the antichrist himself. Using her day off from work, Sakura accompanied Sasuke around the village as they went down the list of ads in the newspaper.<p>

After an entire day of fruitless searching, Sakura plopped down on her sofa with a scowl. She sat glaring off into space for a while until she suddenly jolted upright.

"Oh! I'm so stupid!" she exclaimed. She dragged them off to the hospital where Takumi was working in the ER. The moment he saw her, the boy walked over, his face already concerned.

"Is something wrong, Sensei?" Takumi inquired.

"Takumi, does your grandmother still own that apartment building near the market?" Sakura asked. Takumi blinked a couple times but then he slowly nodded. Face glowing with excitement, Sakura turned to look at Sasuke.

"I just made you not homeless," she proudly declared. To her surprise, Sasuke patted the top of her head. A silent form of thanks- one that she happily accepted.

Takumi's grandmother was perfectly happy to do her grandson's teacher a favor. And all the things he had told the old woman about his time out at the border had left her with a very good impression of Sasuke. They settled rent rate over tea and signed the contract the very same day.

With Naruto now completely occupied with his Hokage training, Sakura and Sai were the only ones available to help Sasuke move. It wasn't that there was so much stuff to be relocated. Sasuke's few possessions had been moved into storage after his defection from the village and those were brought back in one trip between the three of them. Instead, it was the cleaning and the shopping for furniture that took up all their time. The move spanned over an entire weekend, with Sai and Sakura crashing on the sofa during those two nights.

Sasuke's apartment ended up being one block to the west from the central market, meaning he was a two-minute walk from Ichiraku. Naruto heard the news and howled with jealousy. Sakura's house, two blocks to the east from the market, was a 10-minute walk from Ichiraku. And Naruto's apartment, on the southern edge of the market, was also about 10 minutes from Ichiraku. Only Sai's house was at the far southern edge of the village. The idea of all of them being so close together was strangely comforting to Sakura.

As she sat in Sasuke's living room unpacking one of the few boxes he owned, she stumbled upon two picture frames stacked on top of each other. The first one, obviously, was a group photo of Team 7 as children. Sakura eyed the way Sasuke and Naruto glowered at each other and couldn't help but break into a grin. She set that frame up on the coffee table and then moved onto the other one left in the box. As soon as she flipped it over, Sakura felt like she had been punched in the gut.

The woman with the long, dark hair and the soft smile looked so much like Sasuke that it physically hurt to see her. And the man to the left with a stern expression and the same downward curve of his mouth was clearly Sasuke's father. Off to the right was Itachi, his expression dark even in a face that was still that of a child. And in the middle, in the cradle of his parents, stood Sasuke. With a face still round with baby fat and dark eyes that seemed to sparkle brightly, Sasuke stared up at her.

Choking back the noise that rose up in her throat, Sakura quickly turned away from the photo. But Sasuke heard her and he walked over to see what was wrong. He looked at her kneeling on the ground, hands twisted together, and then at the open box. Sakura squeezed her eyes shut as she watched Sasuke bend over to look into the box too. All was silent for a moment. And then she heard him lift the frame out of the box.

Sakura opened her eyes in time to see Sasuke set the photo on the coffee table next to the one of Team 7. Then, with his elegant fingers, he slowly pushed the frame over. It fell on its front, hiding the photograph from sight.

Sakura stared at Sasuke, trying to make sense of his expression. Because his face wasn't blank. His eyes were far away and if she looked hard enough, she thought she could see something deep stirring under the surface.

"I can't face them yet," was all he said.

Swallowing thickly, Sakura nodded. She reached out, lightly touching the back of his hand. Not looking at her, Sasuke turned his hand over to lace his fingers with hers. She squeezed tightly and he squeezed back just as hard. Staring off into different directions, neither of them said anything as Sakura shed a couple silent tears.

Seeing that photograph of Sasuke's family shook Sakura. But a few days later, when she had had the chance to think rationally again, a thought occurred to her. In her parents' house, in a small corner of the living room, there was a family shrine. Her family had never been religious but they still kept that shrine with pictures of her paternal grandparents. Every morning her mom left little rice cakes as offerings and sometimes Sakura caught her dad sitting there just talking to his mother and father with the fragrance of incense in the air. Sakura had never met them before but it somehow made them seem closer to her.

Sakura supposed that when her parents passed on, she would set up a shrine like that in her own living room. Somewhere near the window so it would be in the sun. Her mom loved the sunlight.

But what this train of thought ultimately led to was Sakura wondering about Sasuke's family. There hadn't been anything resembling a family shrine at his new apartment. There simply hadn't been anything included in those boxes from storage. And she doubted that he had thought to pack those things up when he had left the village years ago.

So on a strange whim, Sakura snuck into the abandoned Uchiha district. It was closed off with police tape as it had been for several years. But she easily crossed it anyway. There were shoeprints here and there and some discarded trash, probably from little kids wandering around on a dare. She picked up the garbage as she passed, feeling sad for the ruins of an entire family.

Sakura vaguely remembered walking through the Uchiha district with her mother on a delivery one day. There had been a gathering at someone's house and they had ordered food from her parents' business. Sakura had held her mom's hand, eyes wide with excitement as she looked around at all the new people. And the person who had answered the door hadn't been an adult but Sasuke. It had been right around the time she had entered the academy and she had heard rumors about the good-looking boy. Sasuke had run to get his mother as Sakura felt the beginnings of her first crush blooming inside her heart.

But now, in the middle of the night, Sakura stood trying to recall that faint memory. She wandered down the dusty streets, peering into open doors and wondering if it would be alright to enter. It felt wrong to tread near these buildings, like she could hear the ghosts of people rushing around her.

It took her a while to remember from all her digging in the Hokage's archives that Sasuke's father had been the head of the clan. Sakura headed for the biggest house in the center of the district. And she remembered the pair of lion-dog statues guarding the front door. They had been partially eroded away by years of rain and they had turned green but she recalled their intimidating grimaces well.

She hesitated for a moment at the door. The police tape across the front entrance had already been broken. She wondered if it had been Sasuke. She hoped so. Anyone else entering this house felt horribly wrong. Even as she took her first step inside, she felt like an intruder. Slipping out of her boots in the foyer, Sakura sadly noticed that there were still other shoes lined up there, waiting for owners that would never come. She stepped inside, dust powdering her bare feet.

The living room was directly to the left, the sliding door still ajar. Taking in a dusty breath, Sakura slipped into the room. She squinted in the dim light until she saw a rectangular shape up against a wall. As she neared, she saw that it was a lacquered wooden cabinet of some sort. And on the middle platform, were two picture frames. They were caked over with dust. With trembling hands, Sakura reached out and took one. She rubbed the glass with her fingers until she recognized the bright smile as Sasuke's mother. She did the same for Sasuke's father and replaced the frames on the shelf.

There was an old incense burner in there along with a small flower vase. The dried stalk in the vase had probably been some sort of flower at some point. Sakura stared for a long time at these things. Rather than parts of one shrine, it looked like she was staring at artifacts in a museum of a forgotten age. A past that would never return.

Crouching in front of that neglected place, Sakura buried her face in her arms and sat unmoving for a while. And then, she got to her feet, dusted off her hands, and walked out.

The next day, after work, she dropped by the Yamanaka flower shop to pick up a bouquet of white cosmos. Ino's mother, out of friendly curiosity, asked who they were for.

"My friend's parents," Sakura replied honestly.

She slipped into the Uchiha district. This time, she wasn't so afraid. She was still just as sad. But as she sat wiping the shrine down with a rag she had brought, Sakura realized that if there were any ghosts lurking around this place, they probably wouldn't attack her for trying to pay her respects.

Sakura lit the incense and put a few flowers into the vase. She had considered bringing rice cakes or some other food as an offering. But she didn't know how often she would be able to visit and the idea of leaving rotting food at a shrine also felt wrong. So she settled for the flowers and sat on the dusty floor for a while, just looking at the pictures of these strangers.

After half an hour, Sakura got up and went home where she cooked dinner for her and Sai.

She was back again a few days later with fresh cosmos.

And she sat in the dust, knees hugged close to her chest. The silence was nice and the spring air was warm and faintly floral. She grew to like looking at Sasuke's parents- especially his mother. She had a kind face. Sakura liked to think that she was the sort of mother who stroked Sasuke's head and bandaged up his scrapes and cuts with tender hands.

It became a part of her routine, going to visit Sasuke's parents. Sai only knew she came home 45 minutes later every Monday and Thursday but he never asked what was happening. Swapping out flowers and then gazing curiously into those frozen faces was strangely comforting. Sakura kept her odd habit a secret from Sasuke.

He had said he wasn't ready to face them so she would do it until he was ready.

* * *

><p>Being home made it easy to fall back into old habits.<p>

For the first few weeks back in Konoha, Sakura had steered clear of alcohol. Not because she wanted to. A cold beer after a long day of work was one of the joys of life. But her compromised immune system was dealing with enough crap as is.

As it was, sometimes she felt woozy or spiked a fever if she was on her feet for too long. This scared the hell out of the hospital staff who often urged her to go lie down and take a nap. Their concern for her was touching, especially since she knew how overrun everyone was at the moment. Cleaning up after war was always toughest on the medical staff.

Still, through weeks of sleep and good food, Sakura felt her body slowly returning to normal. Her yin seal slowly lightened until it was a dull shade of dark turquoise as chakra began to siphon off into it again. Shizune took care of the burn marks on her back and shoulders easily when Sakura reported in for her physical.

"I took a look at Kiba-kun, by the way," Shizune told her while she worked. Lying on her front on the exam table, Sakura just hummed in the back of her throat.

"Do you want to know the secret of minimizing heavy scarring in cases like that?" Shizune asked. Sakura nodded, her eyes opening.

"Make an extra layer of skin," the older woman told her. Sakura arched her eyebrows.

"Really?" she asked.

"I know it sounds crazy but if you generate this really thin layer of skin on top, it'll minimize the appearance of scars and actually help patients heal faster. And then, after a while, it'll just peel off on its own. I did it on Kiba-kun yesterday and he's looking spiffy as ever. He'll have to get his clan's tattoos done again, though," Shizune confirmed. Sakura let out a heavy sigh.

"I wish I'd known that. It would've saved him a lot of discomfort," she grumbled. Shizune's laugh was clear but also a little melancholy.

"You know, Sakura-chan, you're the youngest Chief of Medicine Konoha has ever seen. I think you can cut yourself a little slack. You have time to learn," Shizune assured her in that sisterly way she had always done. Slightly mollified, Sakura lowered her head onto her arms again and let Shizune get back to healing.

By the time things at the hospital started to quiet down, Sakura felt the urge to go visit one of her old haunts. It was a bar located near Jounin HQ. Dimly-lit with reasonably-priced drinks, it used to be her go-to place for a shot or five after a hard mission.

After a shift than ran over an extra two hours, Sakura shed her white coat and headed straight for the bar. Sai, she knew, was at work dealing with an especially tough interrogation for the night. It was drizzling lightly but not enough for her to run. When she walked into the building, hair damp and curling from the humidity, sharp eyes flickered to look at her. It was an instinct though. Shinobi were suspicious by nature and they quickly turned their attention back to their conversations again. Sakura slid into the corner seat at the bar, her fingers tapping against the wooden top.

"Long time no see, old man. You miss me?" she teased the portly bartender. He snuffled behind his moustache, a noise of irritation. But then he set a clean glass in front of her along with a dark bottle of whiskey. She poured herself a generous glass and then sipped. The burn of hard liquor and the heat in her belly were things she had missed.

It was on her second glass that the door opened again along with a familiar chakra. Her eyes lazily slid to the door where she saw Hyuuga Neji walk in. She almost sighed at the cosmic irony of it all. Of course she would have a heart-to-heart talk about the man with Ino and run into him less than a week later. She knew he had sensed her presence there but didn't choose to acknowledge him until he was walking straight up to her. Propping her right cheek up in her hand, she dangled her glass in front of her.

"Want a drink? It's on me," she offered. Neji stared at her with pale eyes for a moment before he pulled up the stool on the other side of the corner. Then he accepted the little glass from her, eyeing the dark liquid inside. As she watched him drink, Sakura motioned for another glass to the bartender. She caught it in her left hand as it was slid down the bar toward her.

"It you came here to apologize, I don't want to hear it," she suddenly stated. Neji coughed a little as he drank but covered his reaction rather well otherwise. Maybe it was the warm fuzz of alcohol loosening her tongue a little, but Sakura just blurted the words out. It had been a long day at work, her feet hurt, and here she was finally talking to the source of her irritation for the first time in a while. Grimacing, Neji pulled his glass away from his mouth to eye her.

"You're terrible," was all he said.

"Shut up," she responded without sting in her words. For a moment, she remembered what had pulled her to him so much in the beginning. He seemed to feel it too because the corner of his mouth began to quirk up. She busied herself pouring herself another glass.

"Hey! Uchiha's here! What're you doing here, you sorry bastard?" someone roared with laughter from a table near the door. There was good-natured chortling as they heard the door swing shut. Sakura's eyes automatically searched for the dark hair and sharp shoulders. When she found him, she found that he seemed to be looking for her too. Waggling her fingers at him in a wave, she motioned him over.

"Sasuke-kun, have a drink with me!" she called. Some of the men that had been out on the border with her had been talking to Sasuke. But when they spotted her, they began elbowing Sasuke with sly grins and pushing him toward her.

Sakura heard Neji let out a sigh. Her ability to switch attention to people was quick, she admitted. She smiled apologetically before she felt Sasuke standing behind her. He smelled like the rain and she could feel the heat from his body against her back.

"Are you drunk?" Sasuke asked without so much as a greeting. The barstool to her right scraped across the floor as he pulled it back to sit on it. Sakura shook her head as she pushed her glass into his hand.

"Not yet. Catch up," she prompted. Lifting the glass to his mouth, Sasuke glanced over at Neji and nodded his acknowledgement. Sasuke downed everything at once before sliding the glass back over to her. Humming with approval, Sakura filled the glass and tossed it back, one dainty pinky rising in the air.

"So, I don't think Uchiha Sasuke is a frequenter of dive bars so tell me what's up," said Sakura when she wiped absently at her face with the back of her hand. Eyebrows knitting together, Sasuke stared at her mouth.

"Are you wearing lipstick?" he asked suddenly.

"Huh? Oh, yeah. For work. It's this tinted lip balm Ino gave me," she replied. The faint coral color had smeared past her lip. Sasuke reached over and rubbed at it until the smudge disappeared. Sasuke's fingers burned where they touched. Blaming the heat from the whiskey, Sakura murmured her thanks. Feeling a stare boring into the side of her face, Sakura looked over at Neji. He watched the two of them the same way she had often seen him looking down several enemies he needed to conquer at once.

"Naruto wants me to remind you that we're all having dinner tomorrow. He says if you skip out he's going to break into your house and steal all the food in your fridge," Sasuke told her. Attention reclaimed, Sakura rolled her eyes.

"Funny. Then he's getting nothing but a bunch of vegetables. Maybe I should skip just so he gets some proper nutrition," she muttered. Exchanging smirks, they snickered at the thought of Naruto eating any vegetable not boiled in ramen broth.

"Ah, I see. You two are dating. Well, no need to be the third wheel. I'm going home," Neji finally concluded.

Sasuke swiftly reached over to chug down Sakura's drink while she fixed Neji with a frown.

"What're you talking about?" she scoffed. She looked over at Sasuke who was pouring himself yet another drink.

"I hope you're planning to pay for that if you finish it all," she said. He stared apathetically into her eyes as he slid the full glass over to her.

"You told me to catch up," he replied. Trying not to smile, she signaled the bartender for another glass. Sasuke caught it to fill it up. Still feeling Neji's stare on her, she turned to glower at him.

"Didn't you say you were going home?" she demanded. He bristled until he saw that she was smiling.

"I'll see you around, Hyuuga," Sakura said. Neji held her gaze for a long moment. She remembered the intensity of his stare as they lay side by side, chests rising and falling erratically. Pulling the thin sheets up to her chest, she would glance over and see how far he was. Right there but a million miles away. But now, even though they were sitting so far apart, she could reach him. His eyes searched hers as he set his glass down on the bar. Neji nodded.

"Good night, Haruno," he answered. Sakura watched him turn and exit the bar, her cheek still in her hand.

Ino had been sort of right. They hadn't needed to talk. But she had needed to see his face and exchange a couple barbs. And the whiskey had patched things over. They would never be alright the way she and Kiba were. After all, she and Neji had never been friends to begin with. But Sakura supposed that she would no longer fantasize about kicking him in the teeth whenever she saw him. And that was probably healthier than nothing.

Feeling like a huge weight had been taken off her shoulders, Sakura sagged against Sasuke.

"That's it?" Sasuke's voice in her ear startled her. The vibration of his chest against her arm tickled a little. She sat up straight and then scooted her stool over so their arms were pressed together.

"Yeah, I guess," she answered with a shrug.

"All that tension and anger. Like that?"

"…Yeah."

Sasuke stared at her. Reading his face, Sakura let a grin slip across her lips.

"You think I should've punched him in the face," she guessed. The grim line of his scowl answered. A soft laugh fell from her mouth.

"I think that there's no point being mad since I hurt him too. Hitting him wouldn't make me feel any less terrible. It's better to make peace and move on," Sakura told him. The bias in Saske's disgruntled glare was clear. He saw her as the victim and Neji as some sort of villain.

How chivalrous her Sasuke-kun was. At heart, he wasn't much different from that boy who had protected her in the Forest of Death during her first Chunin exam.

"I'm a big girl, Sasuke. I make a shitty mess out of my life. And then I clean it up again all by myself," she bravely declared and stuck her chin out defiantly. Sasuke's expression softened slightly. He nudged his glass with his pointer finger until it clicked against hers. Dark amber liquid sloshed inside but didn't spill out.

"…Then what am I supposed to do?" Sasuke asked so quietly that she almost didn't hear him.

Those words pierced her. She had never heard Sasuke sound so openly lost before. There had been times when she had tasted it, felt the surface of that vast loneliness. Even though she had spent the past 10 years with a big Sasuke-shaped hole in her heart, she had a feeling that it was nothing compared to the state of Sasuke's.

As she stared up at the ceiling, she listened to the low hum of conversation around them. Her finger traced around a circle of water left by someone's glass.

"You," she said, pausing to draw in a deep breath. His head turned toward her.

"You just need to be the emotionally constipated and awkward Sasuke-kun that you are," Sakura concluded solemnly. When her gaze descended on him, the quirk in his eyebrows elicited another smile.

"One more and then I need to go home because I have work tomorrow," Sakura said, holding up her glass. With a sigh, Sasuke clinked their drinks together. They sat squished together with no room for anything in the world between them.

Despite Sakura's protests, Sasuke walked her home.

Well, he didn't really offer to. He just followed her in the completely opposite direction of his apartment until she let out an exasperated noise and spun on her heel to face him.

"At least quit skulking behind me like a stalker," she grumbled. He stood, hands in his pockets, posture slightly less perfect than usual. Sakura stalked up to him to hook her arm through his. When she leaned against him, she caught the clean smell of soap.

"The weather's so nice and the stars are out and-" Sakura stopped talking when she saw the upwards tilt of Sasuke's mouth.

"What?" she demanded as they continued walking.

"Are you always this clingy when you're drunk?" he inquired.

"I'm not drunk. If I were drunk, you'd have to carry me home. And you should know by now that I'm always a loving, snuggling person, you jackass," Sakura snapped back. She laughed at the ridiculousness of her statement and Sasuke just shook his head. They stayed to the right side of the road, watching out for the occasional person passing on a bike.

"Sasuke?" she suddenly said in a much softer voice.

"What?"

"I'm really glad you're home," Sakura admitted.

"You already told me that," he answered.

"I know. But I had to say it again. I'm really, really glad you're here," she sighed. She heard Sasuke's sigh. And then his arm was shifting, moving to wrap around her. The soft fabric of his long-sleeved shirt was welcome warmth against her bare arms. She could almost hear him scoffing at her for wearing a sleeveless dress when it was still a little cold at night.

"Home, huh?" he repeated the word softly, half under his breath.

Sakura didn't reply. She counted the steps back to her house and wondered when it had become so natural to hear Sasuke's breaths match up with hers.

* * *

><p>Naruto's ceremony was a month later.<p>

Sakura cried like she had always told Naruto she would. The white of the Hokage's robes fit him well, sparkling so perfectly against his golden tan. Her heart swelled with pride and when he stepped down from the platform to hug her, she burst out bawling like a child. Laughing loudly, he swayed her back and forth while Kakashi ruffled his golden mane. Sasuke reluctantly let Naruto pull him into the fray too and Sakura yanked Sai in too despite his unsure looks.

There was a huge party thrown that night with nearly everyone from the village celebrating. The heart of the festivities was held on the bottom floor of the Hokage tower. The dancing and the eating and drinking almost felt surreal after over three years of war. But it was something that the people had needed. The open-mouthed laughter and bright smiles had been missing from the faces of villagers for far too long.

In the darkness just before dawn, Tsunade donned her cloak and left the gates of Konoha. Shizune went with her, a sad smile on her face as Sakura hugged her tight. She had been more than a senpai over all these years. She had been a sister and a great comfort during the worst of her training.

"I was brought in during a time of great turmoil and war. It's time for a new leader," Tsunade simply said when Sakura scowled up at her. Eyes tearing up, Sakura hugged her beloved mentor too.

Only she and Naruto were present to see the two of them off. They stood side by side watching the two women disappear into the forest. Naruto and Sakura lingered for longer than necessary in that hushed time when the village was still sleeping.

With Naruto swept up in his new duties as the Hokage, he became a rare sight around the village. In the end, Sai politely turned down the Intelligence Division's offer and rejoined ANBU. With Shizune and Tsunade gone, Sakura suddenly found her workload even worse than before. Sasuke seemed close to going stir crazy being unable to leave the village until Ibiki and Yamanaka Inoichi offered up Sasuke the job Sai had declined. With at least something to do during the day, Sasuke was saved from going insane.

Naruto's absence was a loud sort of silence. Sakura dropped by whenever she could and that seemed to cheer him up especially as he was assaulted with paperwork and meetings every day. Sai's presence became a little erratic too as he flitted around doing various assignments with ANBU.

The routine of visiting Sasuke's old house was a sort of anchor in her schedule. Sakura never failed to drop by with flowers. The hush of sitting in front of the family altar was a rare moment of peace in her hectic days.

As the flowery sweetness of spring shifted to the lazy warmth of early summer, Sakura found herself silently exiting the empty house she had grown fond of. The increasingly balmy nights meant that people buzzed around in the streets longer. Sakura could hear the chatter and glow from the market even from several blocks away. Hugging the remaining flowers to her chest, she began walking down the street when she felt something faint. It was a very well-suppressed chakra somewhere in the district nearby. She half-considering masking her presence too before she realized that abruptly hiding herself would only draw more attention. She occupied herself wondering who would be wandering around here when she saw a figure round the corner.

The low call of "Sakura" hit her deep in the gut. Even though he was too far away to see very well, she would recognize that voice anywhere.

Him and those damn sharingan that found her immediately.

Frozen in place, she gaped as Sasuke stalked over to her. The darkness in his stare was suddenly terrifying. All she could do was watch as he his eyes roved over her and then slid to the house she had left from. She sucked in a shaky breath only when he had entered the house.

She could imagine him staring at her footprints in the thick layer of dust. She was always careful to fit into those prints, afraid to leave any other trace of herself. They would lead into the living room where everything was covered in a heavy layer of white except for the cabinet and the spot on the floor where she curled up each time. Those photos of his parents would be immaculate and the scent of incense would probably still be hovering in the air. His glare would move from the fresh flowers to the photos again and then she couldn't imagine what his reaction would be.

When Sasuke emerged from the house, she wasn't prepared for the blank look on his face. Anger she could handle from Sasuke. Disdain and disgust she could deal with. But he walked up to her again so calmly and words burst out of her in a frantic torrent.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be nosy. But I just thought that if it was my parents and I never had a chance to visit, they'd be sad. And then I thought it would be bad not to leave flowers and then it was all dusty and oh God this is so wrong. But you said you weren't ready to face them so I didn't want to a-"

Sasuke cut her off when he took another step toward her. His fingers grasped her chin, so carefully like she might break into pieces if he was too rough.

Before she could react, his lips were covering hers. It was almost a chaste touch, skin brushing skin. It still sucked the breath from her lungs. She trembled, eyelids fluttering but never closing. When Sasuke pulled back, she could feel tears welling up in her eyes. His forehead rested against hers. With dark irises piercing and soft, Sasuke inhaled slow and long.

"Go home, Sakura," he uttered in a soft voice.

Panic suddenly overflowed in her chest. Before she could stop herself, she had flash-stepped away from him and directly into her home. She collapsed against the wall in her foyer, rattling the picture frame above her head. The noise drew Sai's attention. His head poked out from the living room, hair still damp from his shower. Sakura didn't know what expression she had on her face but his eyes narrowed.

She slid down, flopping to the floor in a numb heap. Throwing the flowers to the side, she raked her fingers through her hair and stared up at the ceiling. Sai padded over to sit next to her. His long legs stretched out in front of him and he just kept her company there.

* * *

><p>I am a master of all things evil and cliffhanger. Sorry for throwing some people into panic with the previous chapter. This story still has a ways to go.<p>

Thank you, as always, to each reader and reviewer. All the positive feedback I've been getting has been unexpected but I'm grateful nonetheless.


	10. Aster

I'm moving into my apartment at school tomorrow so I rushed to finish this chapter. Hope the quality hasn't suffered too much in my haste. Thanks to everyone for all the love and support I've gotten for this story so far.

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 10: Aster

It was June.

Sakura blinked a few times, rubbing her eyes in between. There was no way that was correct. It had just been the end of May. And Naruto had been sworn in as Hokage and then she had started this new project and now… it was June? Running her finger down the boxes on the calendar, she counted once and then counted again.

"Sensei?"

Sakura turned around. Takumi stood behind her with a little metal tray. On it was a tiny glass bottle and a hypodermic needle. Takumi was deceptively sharp. He could spot that something was off but he didn't say anything. Letting out a tired sigh, Sakura patted the top of Takumi's head for a moment.

"Don't let your youth wither away, dear student," Sakura told him. At this, Takumi frowned.

"You're like two years older than me, Sensei," he answered with a sour look. The fact that she had to reach up to pat his head only added to the statement. But Sakura just sighed.

"Two ancient, forgetful years. Where's Nozomi?" Sakura said. A dark head of hair popped in through the door. When Sakura pointed at the tray, Nozomi moved from the office next door and into the lab, still chewing the last mouthful of her lunch.

With Kei and the head nurse running things upstairs in the hospital, Sakura had tackled a tricky bit of research in the lab in the basement. This wasn't just the regular lab one floor below ground. After the incident with all the Delta-Hachi going missing, Tsunade had gone on lockdown. Now hospital protocol required that all classified research take place in the secondary lab buried underground. The security clearance required to get here meant that only a handful of people even knew about the lab's existence. For now, most of the hospital staff believed Sakura was currently locked in her office catching up on a year's worth of paperwork and were strictly instructed not to bother her.

"What exactly are you trying to make?" asked Naruto as he had squinted at her report a few days earlier. The list of technical terms and chemicals had probably been very intimidating to him. Sakura had forgotten that not everyone could decipher complex chains of scientific words like Tsunade had.

"After the whole security breach with the Delta-Hachi, I was thinking about ways to increase the… integrity of our chemical weaponry. So I thought… why not make a key?" she explained, sitting on the edge of Naruto's desk. She leaned over to point out a line of words she had highlighted in yellow.

"Simply put, we're trying to create a substance that will only activate for a certain chakra signature or blood sample. It would be locked until it was triggered open, sort of like the blood you need for a summoning," she said. As she mapped out the definitions of words and walked Naruto through the diagrams included, she felt that his clear blue gaze wasn't focused on her words but rather on her. Halfway through a sentence, Sakura broke off. She had learned to recognize from her students when her audience was losing interest. Lightly bopping Naruto on top of the head, she fixed him with an inquisitive look.

"What's wrong?" he asked without any preamble. Crossing her arms over her chest, a habitual defensive gesture, Sakura frowned.

"Nothing. What're you talking about?"

It was Naruto's turn to look offended.

"Sakura…" he just said in that tone that always guilted her into talking. But this time, her lips were sealed. Poking him in the nose, Sakura slid off the desk.

"I can't go running to the Hokage for all my little problems. I'm fine. I promise," she assured him with a smile. Naruto mashed his lips together. On one hand, it was definitely true that he no longer had the time to pester her about her troubles and try to go around beating up all the people who bothered her. But on the other hand, that protective streak in him wasn't going to die easily. Staring one another down, they seemed to be at a stalemate until Naruto's shoulders sagged.

"You'll come to me if you need help, right?" he finally asked.

"Obviously. Read over the rest of the report. I've got to get back to the lab," Sakura replied. Bumping her fist against Naruto's shoulder, she stepped out of his office and headed to the hospital.

And now, up to her elbows in a pulp of foul-smelling plants, Sakura heaved a sigh through her mask. She had been so excited to get started on this project that she had flung herself into it headfirst. But now, she suddenly felt the energy draining out of her. As she stripped the leaves off the tough stalks, Sakura felt two pairs of curious eyes on her. She looked up to find Takumi and Nozomi exchanging worried glances.

"Do you think you two could finish up separating the stalks and leave them to macerate in the acid? I'll come finish this up tomorrow morning," Sakura said as she peeled her gloves off and tossed them in the trash along with the mask. The distinct look of relief in Takumi's eyes made her smile.

"Happy to see me go?" she asked teasingly as she flicked Takumi's nose.

"More like happy to see you get the hell out of here and get some air, Sensei. What's up with you? You've been sighing and looking out the window for days now," Nozomi piped up with narrowed eyes.

"Ginkaku-san and I'll write up the report for you to read tomorrow, Sensei. You should go get some rest," Takumi quickly cut in. Nodding gratefully, Sakura patted them each on the shoulder and then hurried out of the lab. The nurse in reception looked at Sakura with concern when she saw her signing out.

"Are you feeling unwell again, Haruno-sensei?" she asked. Sakura shook her head as she pulled her white coat off.

"Just taking a break. I'll see you tomorrow," Sakura called as she stepped out of the sterile hospital building and out into the streets of Konoha. After buying groceries, Sakura promptly walked home and began pulling off her dress. As she walked down the hallway yanking it over her head, she heard a thump from upstairs.

"Sai, did you eat?" she yelled before she ducked into her bedroom. She paused, sticking her head out the door to listen for his response.

"There's some miso soup left and some rice in the cooker," he called back down. Sakura knew he must be working on a new piece if he wasn't even coming downstairs. Humming to herself, Sakura changed into a pair of stretchy black shorts along with a long tank top. The sides were so low and the white fabric so thin that her bandeau was completely exposed. But she was at home. It was summer and therefore hot and she was not dealing with any of that right now.

She ate alone sitting at the counter, her legs swinging back and forth as she chewed. After doing dishes, she washed her face and tied up her hair in a messy bun on top of her head. The thoughts of her latest experiment still ran around in her mind. Half-muttering formulas to herself, she popped open a beer and went into her office. Her wrist still hurt from ripping plants apart all morning so she cracked open an old encyclopedia to look up if there were any native plants that could neutralize the strong smell.

The soft thump of Sasuke's landing on the windowsill pulled her from her reading a couple hours later. As her thumb folded the corner of the page down, Sakura looked up at him sitting there. Their eyes locked for one intense moment before she turned her chair around to face the bookcase to her left.

"Today's not your day off," Sasuke finally said.

"It's not," she agreed while her fingers skimmed over spines until they rested on a thin manual with a deep burgundy hue. She plucked it off the shelf to begin leafing through the yellowing pages. Forehead wrinkling, Sakura turned to hunt for another book.

"Have you been avoiding me?" she suddenly asked. Her stare purposely locked onto her work, almost afraid to see what kind of face Sasuke had on. The thud of Sasuke's head resting against the wall answered her.

"You've been avoiding me too," he responded in a slightly sulky voice. Chewing on her lower lip, Sakura reached over to grab her beer from her desk. The three other cans toppled over beside it made Sasuke's eyes narrow.

"You're drunk in the middle of the day? That's not like you," Sasuke commented.

"Then what am I like?" she asked back as she peered at him over the lip of the can. Sakura was the first to look away. The can went back on the desk. She pressed the heels of her hands into her eyes.

"I'm not drunk. I'm just taking a break. Do you need something?" Her voice came out sharper than intended and she immediately dropped her hands to apologize. But Sasuke was just watching her with a soft, sort of sleepy expression. The way he shook his head with his cheek squished to the window frame was childish at best. Pressing her lips into a scowl, Sakura turned back to her reading- not because she was angry. She was just afraid what kind of look she would have on her face otherwise.

Sasuke sat on her windowsill for a while. The constant chatter of the cicadas in the soft haze of heat outside sang to them. Smells of wood, earth, and flowers wafted in with each puff of wind. The dry rustle of each page turning wasn't the only noise Sakura made. She leaned back in her chair and the wood creaked. Her pencil scratched across her notes too.

"You don't want an apology?" Sasuke suddenly asked.

Sakura's startled gaze flitted to him. His right shoulder was pressed against the frame and his head tilted over to rest on it. His left leg was stretched out, taking up the length of the window while his right leg was bent in front of him, right elbow placed on top of it. A mixture of limbs and dark eyes that seemed like it belonged right there in that moment. Her heart ached for one piercing instant to accompany that thought. The idea that Sasuke belonged there, the idea that she wanted to capture that one flash of time and seal it up in her heart forever was so familiar to her.

Sakura stood so abruptly that her chair wobbled a little, threatening to fall over. Eyes narrowing, Sakura stalked over to Sasuke to stare at him.

"No," she stated. Short. Curt.

"Why?" he demanded just as bluntly.

The question punctured her bubble of insincere anger. Because to be completely honest, she wasn't angry at him. She never had been. She knew her expression had softened because Sasuke's eyebrows rose.

"Because I'm tired of hearing you apologize. I'm sick of seeing you bow your head to apologize for things you haven't done wrong," she sighed. Forearm pressed to the wall, she leaned there, staring into his face. They were so close that she could see the subtle mix of dark sepia in his irises that lightened into a softer shade of gold near his pupils. The slow motion of his eyelashes sweeping down and up in a blink was sad somehow. His jaw tightened as he stared back at her.

"We're not little kids, anymore. A kiss is a kiss. It happened. We move on," she added. It was complete bullshit, of course. She, like any other woman, had kissed a few different guys but there had always been reasons for each one. Even after years of life as a hardened shinobi, the romance she associated with kissing had never really gone away. Childish, she supposed, but not unreasonable. Right now, telling Sasuke the truth wouldn't diffuse this awkwardness any faster.

"That's a funny thing to say. You want me to apologize the most," he said softly with narrowed eyes.

Stabbing words that sliced neatly between her ribs. The sudden pain made her mouth drop open in a faint noise. The accusation in his gaze was so sharp.

"I keep telling you, Sasuke-kun, you don't need to say sorry to me."

"That's what you say. But that's not what you want at all, Sakura," Sasuke told her. There was no venom in his words. But they cut deep.

Her forehead pressed to her arm. She made a noise that wasn't really a sigh and wasn't really a laugh. It was a sound that existed, a tired sound.

"Stop trying to make me hate you, Sasuke-kun. It's really not convincing at all," she uttered as she closed her eyes.

Sasuke was so transparent. Pushing her away, pushing everyone away when he was in pain was what he did best. In her youth, all soft and sensitive, she had let him. The sting of his rejection had always made her pull away. And before she had realized it, Sasuke had slipped through her fingers entirely.

"You're an idiot," added Sakura with a sigh. When her eyes opened again, Sasuke was staring at her like she had punched him in the face. And then a semblance of composure returned to his expression. The scowl she knew so well returned. They looked at each other, measuring each other up with unvoiced questions.

"So the kiss never happened," she tentatively proposed. Expression carefully neutral, Sasuke nodded. Still, there was another awkward pause. Sakura thought about bringing up the reason for this whole mess but Sasuke beat her to the punch.

"I don't dislike you visiting my parents," Sasuke admitted after a while.

"Okay," she answered.

And then she reached out with one hand. Before Sasuke could react, she shoved hard against his chest. The precise instant he lost balance, his eyes popped open. Laughing loudly, Sakura watched him tip over, just barely managing to hook his leg around the ledge to keep from falling completely. He righted himself with a glare aimed toward her.

"There. Now we're even," she stated.

For good measure, she shoved him again. This time, Sasuke didn't budge. The startled chuckle that left him when she stuck her tongue out was unfamiliar to her. This alien noise, Sasuke's laughter, she didn't know how to feel about it. But she smiled anyway.

The faint sensation of his lips on hers lingered in her mind but she pretended to forget. It was easier to move on if she forgot.

* * *

><p>The instant Sakura felt her body could maybe handle a good spar, she was out on the training grounds. Usually, if she woke up early enough, she could catch Lee and get in a good round of taijutsu before work. But mostly, she ended up sparring with Sai. Their work schedules synced up pretty well and it was nice to be able to use chakra without feeling like a cheater.<p>

"Aw man, I'm rusty as hell already," Sakura groaned early in July. The bruises on her shins faded with one lazy pulse of chakra. As she sat up, she checked over her arms for any extra injuries. Sai, head between his knees, winced when he looked over at her.

"You **have** slowed down somewhat. Your kick hasn't gotten any softer, though," admitted Sai. Wiping the sweat out of her eyes, Sakura scooted over on the grass. She pulled at his shirt until Sai yanked the whole thing off and bunched it up in his right fist. Seated between her legs, Sai squinted up into the hot sunlight while she gathered chakra. The hum of her healing was familiar between them.

"I cracked a couple ribs. Sorry," Sakura said. Her fingers pressed lightly against his reddened skin. A short hiss escaped Sai's mouth. She channeled more chakra there in response.

"We missed your birthday," commented Sai. The remark was so random that Sakura stopped her chakra to stare at him.

"It occurred to me yesterday. We didn't celebrate your birthday this year," Sai clarified. Letting out a short laugh, she resumed healing.

"Ah, forget it. We'll just party twice as hard next year," she answered with levity that surprised herself.

"But you're the one who told me that birthdays are precious because they're days to celebrate the people we love," Sai insisted.

"Sai, it's not really a big deal," she ground out. Anyone else would have caught on by now that she wanted to drop the subject. Not Sai. Obviously, not Sai.

"You're projecting your stress onto me. What's wrong?" observed Sai. He seemed unbothered by her sudden anger. His ribs were sealed up nicely by then. Sakura dropped her hands into her lap.

"I just… I'm not in a real celebrating mood right now, okay?" she uttered.

* * *

><p>"And then she got up and left," Sai reported. Dropping his pen, Naruto pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers. Leaning over in his chair, Naruto pointed at Sai standing in front of his desk.<p>

"Do you really have to wear that stupid mask? I know who you are, Sai," Naruto complained.

"But it's protocol. And what if someone were to walk in?" replied Sai completely logically. Naruto rolled his eyes but then his expression hardened. He hadn't seen Sakura much these past couple weeks. He knew that she was working steadily, her workaholic tendencies returning as soon as her body could handle it.

"Not in the mood to celebrate," he muttered. Rubbing his chin, Naruto glanced over at the calendar on the wall. He processed Sakura's words and then the numbers on the calendar together for a minute. Something clanked together inside his brain, slowly taking form. And by the time he realized what the answer was, Naruto felt like banging his head against his desk.

"Of course. It's July," Naruto groaned. Raking his fingers through his hair, he turned around to look out the window.

"Ah, it's… this is right around the time Sasuke left all those years ago," explained Naruto. Sai pulled his mask off to reveal a perplexed expression. Frowning, Sai looked from Naruto to the calendar.

"But Uchiha is home now," Sai slowly said. Naruto shook his head.

"He might be back but that doesn't take away all the pain. Sakura-chan's heart will never go back to the way it was, Sai," Naruto answered. This didn't seem to satisfy Sai.

"Didn't Uchiha apologize? Doesn't that fix things again? I was led to believe that this was how friendships worked," Sai insisted. A humorless smile curled Naruto's lips.

"You can forgive your friends, Sai. But it's like fixing a broken cup. You can glue the pieces back together but the cracks are still there," sighed Naruto in an uncharacteristically melancholy voice. This seemed to strike a chord in Sai because he stopped arguing.

"As her friends, what can we do for her?" inquired Sai after a long moment.

"Nothing, really. We just kind of wait it out with her, I guess."

Sai interpreted this as buying a big set of pudding for Sakura from her favorite bakery. When she opened up the fridge the next day after work, she saw the little clear glasses of custard pudding sitting on the middle shelf, waiting for her. They even had little patterns of rabbits printed into the top in caramel. Sakura eyed these treats for a long time before she let out a heavy sigh. Grabbing two of the glasses, she took two spoons and marched up the stairs. Sai was sitting in his room at his desk, hunched over a sketchbook. She set one of the puddings next to him along with a spoon. Sai's dark eyes flitted to her with the movement.

"You're home pretty often these days. Did Naruto fire you for sexual harassment already?" Sakura asked as she sat on his bed.

"Things have settled down for the time being so we're mostly working on drills and gathering intelligence," he replied with a shrug. Sakura spooned a jiggling bite of the custard into her mouth. It was sweet and perfectly soft.

"What's this for, by the way? Is it a bribe?" she inquired, pointing to the dessert with her spoon. Sai dropped his pencil.

"You seem upset lately. And you told me that eating sweet things often helps you relieve stress," Sai answered simply. Sakura paused to stare down at her half-eaten pudding. She then looked up and found that Sai was watching her with a faint line in his forehead that he only got when he was thinking very hard.

"…Is it helping?" he tentatively asked.

Popping another spoonful into her mouth, Sakura nodded. She flopped onto her stomach to continue eating while Sai resumed drawing.

The pudding didn't fix her gloomy mood. Neither did sitting there with Sai and dozing off to the sounds of his pencil scratching across his paper. But she woke up from her short nap feeling surprisingly refreshed and she supposed that was good enough. She could tell from Sai's gesture that Naruto had probably told him what was up with her lately. To be honest, she hated herself when she got this way but there was no better way to deal with it. She just couldn't help it.

This time of year, she always felt like utter crap and her personality seemed to change to fit that mood. She hated self-pity and so for a time, she hated herself intensely. To deal with it, she locked herself in the lab where the only people who had to put up with her really were Nozomi and Takumi and they were smart enough to know that her prickliness wasn't aimed toward them. They made it a point to always have coffee ready for her and that sweetness softened the worst of her moodiness when she was with them. After work, several beers or a bottle of wine were enough to help her fall asleep with all the chaos bouncing around inside her head.

The second week of July, Sakura woke up feeling significantly less terrible and decided that she needed to stop isolating herself. After work, she went snooping around the village for someone to eat with. Naruto was sloughing through paperwork and today was Ino's date night with Chouji. With Sai off on a mission scheduled to last for at least another week, Sakura decided to go pester Sasuke at the Intelligence Bureau.

"Let's go eat dinner," Sakura announced as she popped her head into Sasuke's office. Shikamaru stopped talking to raise a lazy hand in greeting. Waving back, Sakura slipped into the room. Her high heels tapped loudly against the concrete floor as she approached the desk.

"I'm not hungry," Sasuke replied, glancing at her briefly.

"Well I am and I don't feel like eating alone," she easily countered.

"Go eat with Sai. Or Naruto," he answered, still writing. Sakura rolled her eyes.

"Sai's on a mission until tomorrow and Naruto's working," Sakura said.

"So am I. Go find someone else," Sasuke retorted in a firm voice.

Sakura stared at him hunched over his work for a moment before she let out a sniff. Arms crossed over her chest, Sakura strode to the doorway and leaned out.

"Hey, does anyone want to get dinner with me?" she called in a loud voice that bounced down the corridor. It took a moment and then several doors opened. Heads popped out to look at her. Sakura felt Sasuke's glare on her back.

"Ah, Haruno! I'll go! Just give me a second to finish up here."

"I'll come. You want to grab a drink too?"

"Oi, Nara, let's get food with Haruno."

A bunch of voices (all male) called back to her.

The Intelligence Division was comprised mostly of men and the long hours meant that many of those men were single. Very single.

Sakura glanced back to wink at Shikamaru, who just rolled his eyes. He had seen Ino playing the same game before.

She heard Sasuke's sigh just before he was moving so quickly that he was almost a blur. Sasuke grabbed her by the upper arms and practically carried her down the hallway.

"Hey! Where are you going, Haruno?" someone called.

"Sorry! First come, first serve! Maybe next time, boys!" she yelled in response. Ignoring the groans of disappointment and dissatisfaction echoing after them, Sasuke pushed her up the stairs and out the lobby until they were on the street.

"You're a demon," Sasuke muttered.

"And don't you forget it," she replied with a sweet smile. Bumping her hip against his, she strode onwards.

They went to eat udon because eating ramen without Naruto was considered betrayal of the highest degree. Sakura ordered two beers for them too, not noticing the way Sasuke's eyes narrowed. They clinked cans together and Sakura took a big gulp before even touching her meal.

"How're things at work? You fitting in?" she asked as she busied herself picking up some fat noodles between her chopsticks. Sasuke, in the middle of chewing, didn't speak until he had swallowed all the food in his mouth.

"It's fine. Sai was right. It's basically a desk job," he answered.

"Bah, I kind of wish I could go back to that. I don't think I get the chance to ever sit down when I'm at the hospital anymore," she responded half-jokingly. This time she caught the sharpness in his stare and she started a little.

"You…should take better care of yourself. You always give too much," Sasuke told her rather gruffly. An unladylike laugh spurted out of Sakura. She nearly inhaled a mouthful of noodles and sat coughing for a moment. Sasuke's hand hovered, neither lowering nor reaching out to thump her back. Sakura swallowed down a mouthful of beer to clear her throat, still chuckling.

"Ah, hearing that from you is kind of gross, Sasuke," she giggled. Sasuke's face, which had previously been filled with clear concern, darkened.

"What?" he demanded while watching her slurp down some more noodles. She deliberately took her time chewing and swallowing and wiping her mouth with her napkin before she responded.

"Come on. Do you really see yourself as a mother hen type, Sasuke? You've never been the type to say stuff like that to me," Sakura answered. She hoped her smile was bright enough. The bitterness still lingered there even if she had promised herself to let go of those feelings a long time ago. The truth in her words made them heavy and they went on to eat in silence for a little while. And then Sakura gulped down some more beer with a satisfied sigh.

"Don't look so gloomy. I was a whiny little brat when we were kids so I consider us even," added Sakura with a careful glance at Sasuke. He looked her way too. When she held out her can, Sasuke shook his head a little as he tapped his beer against hers.

Sakura smiled at him, nudging his shoulder with hers until he finally looked her in the face. Her grin was infectious and she knew it. It was a handy skill she had picked up from Naruto. Never had she been so glad for it until Sasuke met her gaze and let a small smile quirk up at the corners of his mouth. Triumphant, Sakura motioned for another beer. She caught it as it slid down the counter toward her. The snap of the tab along with the hiss of carbonation made Sasuke's fleeting smile fade.

"Hey, what's that look for? I've had a hard day so I think I've earned this one too," she laughed. But she saw the silent criticism in his stare. It made her want to squirm a little.

And that made her want to be petty.

"I think you've lost all nagging privileges for a while after your rampage when we were Genin," Sakura jabbed a little. The slight flash of pain in his gaze was strangely satisfying so she dug deeper.

"And plus, when we were kids you told me I was annoying. That's always bothered me a little," she sniffed as she took a sip of beer. She felt his stare on the side of her face.

"I… never called you annoying. I've called you a klutz and an idiot, but never annoying, Sakura," Sasuke replied. Sakura scowled. She pointed her chopsticks at him, flicking drops of broth onto his left hand.

"When we were 12, you suddenly invited me out on a date and we went for a walk in the park. And you got mad at something I said and called me annoying," she insisted. Grumbling under her breath, she picked up her beer and took a loud slurp.

"Sakura, we've never done anything like that. Besides, why would I-" Sasuke broke off mid-sentence with a blank look. Curiosity piqued, she nudged him with her elbow. After a couple of pokes, Sasuke's breath hissed out between clenched teeth.

"Naruto," Sasuke seethed.

Sakura blinked several times.

"When we were kids, there was this one time that Naruto attacked me and tied me up-"

"Kinky," interrupted Sakura with a sly grin. Sasuke paused to glower at her before he continued speaking.

"He transformed into me and then I'm not sure what he did. He kept bragging about going on a date with you for a while after that, though," said Sasuke. The color drained out of Sakura's face until it was completely white. And then, slowly, bright red rose to her cheeks. The can of beer slammed down so hard the counter rattled. Sakura abruptly got to her feet, eyes narrowed into dangerous slits.

"Naruto!" she shouted as she jumped up onto the nearest roof and began sprinting in the direction of the Hokage tower. Sasuke paid for both their meals and then set after her. Sakura was just not-sober enough for Sasuke to be worried for the unsuspecting Hokage's life.

Sakura busted into the Hokage's office a few minutes later. Undoubtedly, ANBU guards on duty had recognized her chakra and made themselves scarce. Chest heaving and eyes glaring, Sakura's face was that of a particularly unhappy demon from hell.

"NA-RU-TO!" she bellowed as she stormed inside. And Naruto, seated alone at his big desk, stared at her with the wide eyes of a bewildered child. When he saw her face contorted with rage, he paled.

"Sakura-chan, what a nice surprise," he sputtered out. Each of her booming steps made Naruto's eyes grow bigger and bigger.

"When we were Genin, did you ever transform into Sasuke and take me on a date?" Sakura demanded in a low voice. Naruto's expression froze. His gaze darted from the furious woman in front of him to the windows as he contemplated making a swift escape. Sakura's eyes narrowed. Naruto swallowed thickly and decided against it. She would just catch him and bash him into the nearest wall until she got answers.

"Um...yes. I mean, it was a long time ago and we were just kids and..." Naruto trailed off as Sakura strode toward him. His hands came up instinctively to protect his head from her barrage of punches and kicks. Instead she grabbed onto the front of his vest and began shaking him.

"Stupid Naruto! Do you know how much I bragged to Ino about that? And then you went and told me I have a charming forehead! You moron! You jerk! That's like the nicest thing a guy has ever said to me and now I find out it was just you?!" she exclaimed. Starting to grow dizzy from all the jostling, Naruto took hold of Sakura's shoulders to stop her.

"Sakura-chan, calm down. I'm getting sick," he sighed. And Sakura's arms stilled for a moment. Hands still fisted into his vest, Sakura stared at him.

"I...I...almost kissed you... YOU ALMOST KISSED ME!" she slowly realized. She began shaking him with renewed vigor.

"Sakura-chan! You're going to kill me!" Naruto gasped, frantically patting at her arms and shoulders.

"That's kind of the point. If I try hard enough I can detach that thick skull of yours from your spine!" growled Sakura. Spotting Sasuke standing in the doorway, Naruto reached a desperate hand toward him.

"Sasuke," Naruto pleaded in a wheeze.

"And risk my life? No thanks," Sasuke flatly answered.

When Sakura finally released Naruto, she dealt him a sharp whack to the forehead for good measure.

"This is no way to treat your Hokage, Sakura," Naruto grumbled, sagging back in his chair. Sakura smacked his forehead again.

"What're the two of you doing here anyway? Out on a date?" Naruto teased despite the bright red handprint on his face.

Eyes narrowing, Naruto looked shrewdly between his two friends. Sakura bristled when she felt him examining the faint blush rising to her cheeks at the implication.

"She bullied me into getting dinner," Sasuke sighed. Sakura slapped Naruto one more time.

"Ow! Hey! What was that one for?" complained Naruto.

"Sasuke's too far away to hit," she answered.

"Anyway, all that running made me sweat off all the alcohol. Sasuke, you got anything to drink at home?" said Sakura as she looked to Sasuke. She pressed her arms to the top of Naruto's head, using him as a convenient armrest. Naruto didn't seem to mind as he looked over at Sasuke too.

"I have some of that plum sake you got me when I moved in," Sasuke told her.

Tweaking Naruto's nose, she wished him luck with his work and then went off with Sasuke.

She sat at the counter, her bare feet tapping against the wood floor as she watched him reach up to pull clean glasses out of the cupboard. The glugs of sake spilling from the bottle sounded almost like music. Sweetness filled her nose as she inhaled. Eyes half-lidded, Sakura peered up at Sasuke with a smile when he turned to slide one of the glasses over to her. She lifted her glass toward him and he quickly tapped it against his.

"You're Mr. Grumpy today. What's wrong?" she inquired before taking a sip. Sasuke didn't even touch his drink. He set it down between them. His right hand rested on top of the counter, fingers spreading out as far as they could stretch.

"You drink a lot," he bluntly said to her.

Sakura bristled.

"So?" The edge to her voice made Sasuke scowl.

"So it's worrying. You didn't drink this much out on the border," he continued.

"Well, Sasuke-kun, I didn't realize that my little habits were so offensive to you. I'll be sure to check in with you every time I decide to breathe or to take a shit or something," Sakura bit back. She chugged the rest of her drink down and slammed the glass down on the counter with unnecessary force.

"You're being immature. I'm just making an observation," Sasuke stated. At this, Sakura let out a derisive laugh.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I hadn't realized that our motherly Sasuke was trying to give me advice. Please, Mother Dear, impart your wisdom," she mocked bitterly.

"Well it's a good thing you're not a mother because you're being incredibly stupid right now."

Sakura flinched, like she had been slapped in the face. Trembling with silent anger, she clenched her teeth.

"Shut up," she ground out.

But now Sasuke was angry too. Sensing her weakness, Sasuke gouged in with twisting words.

"You're so bad-tempered and overly-emotional. I don't think you'd be fit to be a mother anyway."

"I said, **shut up**," Sakura hissed. Hands slamming down on the counter, she stood. Jabbing an angry finger into Sasuke's chest, she smirked.

"Are you really doing this, Sasuke? You're criticizing my character? You? The backstabber who turned on your teammates at the mere hint of power?" she said, enunciating every piercing syllable. But Sasuke was sneering now too. He shoved her finger away from him with ease.

"You're a backstabber too, Sakura. All your smiling and laughing is really just to cover up all your lies," he snorted. Sakura's eyes narrowed.

"What are you talking about? My lies? I'm not like you, Sasuke. What haven't I given for my village, my friends?"

They stood, glaring and bristling while a small part of Sakura wondered how this had even begun. This wasn't what she had come here for. This wasn't what she and Naruto had been fighting for for all these years. But the anger was so acidic and strong in her stomach and she realized that she wanted nothing more than to punch him in the face right then.

"For all your big talk calling Naruto one of your best friends, when was the last time you told him the truth? All you do is use that smile to lie. You're afraid to show your true face to him- to anyone. You're pathetic," Sasuke said in a low voice.

_Pathetic._

The word seemed to echo. Years of watching Naruto's back as he raced forward. Staring longingly after Sasuke as a Genin as he mastered stronger and stronger techniques and eventually abandoned her altogether. Angry tears stung at her eyes as she found her voice again.

"I'm pathetic? How am I pathetic? Yeah, I keep a strong front for Naruto, but not because I'm a liar. It's because if I don't smile for him, who will? You're the one that's really pathetic, Sasuke. You actually betrayed us. Not only that, you betrayed your family," Sakura stabbed fiercely.

"You don't know what you're even saying," Sasuke growled. But the clench of his jaw told otherwise.

"Yes I do. You were always going on about avenging your clan. Well yeah, you avenged them by dirtying the entire Uchiha name. You abandoned your clan because in your stupid quest for revenge, you lost yourself to power. Don't you dare lie to me and say that you were thinking only about vengeance, Sasuke. And now, who in this village will ever hear the name 'Uchiha' and not think of your brother, the murderer, and you, the traitor?" she jeered in response. But the more she stared into his face, the angrier and angrier she got.

"And you know what else? How dare you compare me to you? I've never told my friends that they're no longer needed. I've never called them obstacles!" added Sakura, "You know what people say to me? They say, 'Sakura, you're so kind', 'Sakura, you're so forgiving', 'Sakura, how can you be friends with someone like Sasuke?' And they're right. How can I stand to be friends with you? How can I call someone who has stabbed me in the back so many times my friend?"

"See? You've always wanted an apology," uttered Sasuke with a cold smile.

"I don't want your half-assed apology, Sasuke. Those are just words. Nothing you say will ever fix what you've done to Naruto and me," Sakura answered just as frigidly.

"The truth is that not a day has gone by where I think that what you've done is okay. I'm so disappointed and angry and hurt all the time and sometimes it makes me so upset just to look at you. In fact, I don't even want to see your face right now. I'm going home."

In one last burst of indignation, Sakura stared hard at the empty glass sitting on the counter. Not meeting Sasuke's sizzling gaze, she swiped hard at the cup, sending it skittering off the edge. She listened to it shatter against the floor before she stormed off. The feeling of Sasuke's eyes on her back burned on the way out.

But she didn't march straight home like she had so boldly declared. In fact, it didn't take long for her initial fury to wear off. And it left her feeling sort of deflated and lost. Replaying the conversation over and over in her head, Sakura wandered the roofs of Konoha for about half an hour before she noticed that she had stumbled close to home. Her gaze flickered off to the east where she could see the houses of the Yamanaka district. Still bubbling over with emotions, Sakura let her feet guide her forward.

"Ino-chan," Sakura breathed as she popped her head in through the crack in Ino's open window a few minutes later. Jumping a little, the blonde ran over to open the window all the way, her eyeliner pencil still held in her right hand. Sakura didn't come inside. Her face was so pale and she just stood there, hands on the sill and eyes wide.

"What's wrong?" Ino immediately asked. She had known Sakura for long enough to recognize that small voice.

"I… I might be the worst person in the universe right now, Ino-chan. I shouldn't have said all those things to Sasuke," rambled Sakura. Ino put her hands on her hips.

"What're you talking about? Did he do something to you?" she demanded, voice suddenly growing sharp. But Sakura was shaking her head, childlike and distant in all her actions.

"Sort of. I did too. My fault. His as well," murmured Sakura. Then her gaze fell on Ino's face again. She let out a sigh.

"Sorry. It's your date night. I'm going home," said Sakura before she ducked her head outside and slid down the wall. Ino leaned out the window to watch her friend slide down the wall and them stumble off into the dark. Ino had smelled the alcohol on Sakura's breath but it was nowhere near enough for her to be drunk. Puzzled, Ino shut her window and turned back to her closet.

When Chouji arrived at her house a few minutes later, Ino opened the door with a face pinched with worry. Her make-up was half-done and she was still in shorts and a large t-shirt she used as pajamas.

"What?" he immediately asked with apprehension. Eyes far away, Ino shook her head.

"Sakura just stopped by and she seemed pretty upset," Ino told him, leaning against the door.

"Really? That's pretty unusual," Chouji answered.

"I think she had a fight with Sasuke-kun," she remarked. Chouji cocked his head to one side.

"I thought they got along really well. That's what Shikamaru says, anyway," he offered up, now growing more and more curious.

"Yeah… I thought so too," Ino responded before her eyes refocused on him. Lips pursing, Ino considered her schedule for a moment.

"Chouji, I think I'm going to have to take a rain check on our date. I get the feeling that if I don't go talk to Sakura, she's going to spend the night curled up on her floor crying," she slowly said. Chouji didn't look upset. He merely nodded sagely.

"If Yamanaka Ino is skipping on a date for a friend, it must be pretty serious," he agreed. Laughing, Ino lightly shoved him. Chouji popped his head inside to say hello to her mother before Ino sent him off with a kiss. She then dug in the basement for a good bottle of wine and grabbed the carton of coffee ice cream she had been saving in the freezer before she was off to Sakura's house.

When she rang the doorbell, Ino had to wait a bit before Sakura answered. But Sakura eventually did open the door. Eyes red and hair in a hopeless tangle, Sakura peered out at her through the tiny crack she made when the pulled the door open just a little bit. Rolling her eyes, Ino barged in, shoving the ice cream into Sakura's hands as she toed her shoes off.

"I cancelled my date for this so you better start talking," Ino ordered while pushing Sakura into the kitchen. Sakura sagged limply against the counter. Ino busied herself digging through drawers until she found a corkscrew.

"But your date," Sakura said.

"Can wait. You don't think you can stumble into my house looking like that and expect me not to worry," Ino cheerfully answered. The cork popped out of the wine. At this, a faint smile touched Sakura's lips. She turned to pull two wine glasses out of the cupboard. Ino took two spoons from a drawer, hooked her arm through Sakura's, and hauled them into the living room.

"Sit," she ordered. Ino set the wine down on the coffee table while Sakura flopped onto the sofa. A few moments later, Ino had managed to rustle up some chips from the pantry and poured them into a bowl. She dropped the food onto the coffee table and then settled down on the opposite end of the sofa. After some thought, she grabbed one of the throw pillows and thrust it into Sakura's hands. Sakura hugged it tightly to her chest as she stared off at the window. Eventually it was Ino that spoke. She took a bite of the ice cream straight from the carton. And then she observed Sakura and scooped up some more ice cream in her spoon.

"So," Ino began. When Sakura looked at her, she held up the spoon. Sakura obediently took a bite. The creamy combination of ice cream and coffee, two of her favorite foods, was always a winner with her.

"We fought," Sakura simply answered. Ino rolled her eyes as she fed Sakura another spoonful.

"Well I know that, you dunce. What about?" the blonde probed. Lips pursing, Sakura looked down at her hands. She rubbed her fingers together with a thoughtful expression. Ino scanned the strange expression on her best friend's face before she let out a gasp. The sullen, guilty look was one she recognized from the mirror.

"Sakura, you love Sasuke!" Ino exclaimed.

"Like a dog loves poop," Sakura sighed glumly. Ino's eyes widened.

"Like a cow loves its cud. Like I love all my boys, really," Sakura continued. Ino's lower lip jutted out in a pout.

"Oh. Love like **that**? How boring," complained Ino with obvious disappointment. Not looking at her friend, Sakura slapped her arm.

"You lonely shrew," Sakura remarked. She took the spoon from Ino's hand and gulped down some more ice cream. Ino snatched the utensil back as she stuck out her tongue.

"Hey! You're my only girlfriend. Who else am I supposed to get juicy gossip from? Shikamaru?!" Ino snapped. Sakura stared back at her with a small smile. Leave it to Ino to always cheer her up. Sighing in unison, they slouched back on the sofa together. Putting her feet in Ino's lap, Sakura rubbed her temples. Ino set the ice cream on the table, preparing herself.

"I feel terrible. There are some things you never say to your friends ever, you know?" Sakura said. Ino nodded, eager to finally hear the details.

"Well, we went and said them all. I called him a traitor," Sakura admitted. Ino hissed and Sakura nodded. As she patted Sakura's bare legs with one hand, Ino reached for a glass of wine to hand it off. Sakura glared at the bubbly white wine for a moment before taking a big gulp of it.

"He said I was a backstabber because I always hide my lies behind a smile," she added. Ino looked torn between running over to Sasuke's place to punch him in the face and staying to comfort her. Sakura waited for the conflict to subside in Ino's expression. Ino settled on an impressive scowl, indicating that she had opted for quiet outrage.

"How did this even start? I mean, I thought you guys got along great," Ino probed carefully.

"I don't know. I just... I feel shitty right now and then I kind of lashed out at him," Sakura slowly said. Ino arched an eyebrow.

"You're not as much of a hothead as you used to be, Sakura. What'd he say to get you so pissed off like that?" Ino only continued to dig deeper. Sakura bit her bottom lip. Even remembering the conversation made her flush with guilt. She had said some awful things.

"He... mentioned that it was a good thing I wasn't a mother," she whispered.

The explosion of Ino's screech could have broken the Hokage monument. Cheeks blotchy red and eyes livid, Ino grabbed a throw pillow and began squeezing the hell out of it.

"HOW DARE HE? THAT PIECE OF SHIT! I'LL GUT HIM!" Ino ground out between her teeth. Sakura stared blankly at her. It was rare to see Ino really lose her temper like this. Sakura patted Ino's hands, glad that at least one of them could muster the energy to be so blatantly furious. She had exploded before and now there was nothing left to fuel any sort of rage. But that was the way she had always been. Her anger simmered long and low until she finally succumbed to true fury.

"Ino, he doesn't know. You can't blame him," Sakura reasoned. Ino scowled at her.

"That's true. That doesn't make it okay," Ino snapped back.

"He wouldn't know it wasn't okay unless I told him. And I haven't," Sakura calmly answered, her hands moving to rest on her stomach.

After her battle with Akasuna no Sasori all those years ago, Sakura had noticed changes in her body. She missed several periods and experienced strange bursts of cold and hot flashes until she had gone to Tsunade. Though Chiyo had managed to fix the bleeding to save her life, the damage done internally hadn't been tended to as well. Her uterus had been damaged, pierced through, really. And while the tissue had healed, the scarring had altered the organ in a way that it could no longer sustain a pregnancy. The toxin had affected her ovaries, damaging the tissue enough that her body stopped sending an egg out every month.

At the age of 16, Sakura was rendered completely infertile.

Only a few people even knew. Ino, of course, along with Naruto and Sai. The rest of the village remained ignorant and the kind ladies in the marketplace always asked when she was getting married and having kids. The sting of their kind words never quite went away.

Ugly jealousy overflowed the older she got. Because as a kid, none of that mattered. Being an adult and having children of her own was a far-off future that didn't matter. But here, in her early twenties, watching women marry and starting their own families stirred an odd longing within her. It wasn't that she wanted to get hitched and pop out 10 kids right then and there. The fact that such a future had been stolen from her was what hurt the most.

Sasuke couldn't have known that. Of course. But his words, piercing and oh-so toxic had gouged right into that tender scar. There was another layer to this all though.

"I'm just so angry, Ino. I'm so hurt and frustrated and I'm so tired all the time. I just want to scream and pull my hair but **I can't**. I can't afford to be like that," Sakura sighed. Ino's expression softened.

"Have you ever told him that? Just flat-out said that to him?" she inquired. At this, Sakura snorted.

"Just now, yeah. I told him I didn't want to see his face," responded Sakura. Ino didn't look too sympathetic.

"The way I see it, girl, is that he should get on his hands and knees and do a lot of ass-kissing. And you need to let him. Saying 'it's okay' over and over again won't really make things okay, Sakura," Ino told her. Underneath all the snark and gossip, Ino had always been the wiser out of the two of them. Sakura gnawed on her lower lip as she mulled it over.

"I should say sorry," Sakura stated after a moment. Ino tapped her wine glass against Sakura's.

"You should," the woman agreed while taking a sip, "And then you should break his jaw."

Finally laughing out loud, Sakura shook her head.

She still felt terrible, but it was made that much more bearable with Ino there to listen to her vent.

Sakura woke the next morning with a hangover and swollen eyes from all the crying. Ino lay on the other end of the couch. Their legs were tangled together and the half-eaten ice cream had melted during the night. Squinting up at the sunlight streaming in through the blinds, Sakura sucked in a deep breath.

* * *

><p>"We're going to get a drink. Come on," Naruto ordered as he barged into Sasuke's apartment with Sai. The two of them each hooked an arm through Sasuke's to drag him forcibly out to the bar by Jounin HQ. When they burst in, the bartender looked up reflexively. His eyes skimmed over the trio with a glint of recognition. As they sat down, he let out a sigh.<p>

"Is Doc working tonight? It's rare to see you here without her," he remarked.

"Ah, today's just a guy's day. Can we get three beers?" Naruto cheerfully replied. They waited around until their drinks were served before Naruto put on his best stern expression.

"So why did you guys fight anyway?" demanded Naruto.

Sasuke blinked.

"No use trying to fool me. Poor Sai's been tiptoeing around worrying about getting his head cut off for the past week," Naruto added as he wagged a finger in Sasuke's face.

"I've been offering up custard puddings to ensure my survival," Sai piped up.

"I commented on her drinking a lot more lately and she got really upset," Sasuke answered. Naruto's eyes popped open. He had been prepared to grill Sasuke mercilessly before getting any sort of real information. The ease of the extraction startled him.

"Sakura's always enjoyed recreational drinking. You don't seem the type to nag her about her hobbies," Sai commented. Naruto rubbed at his chin.

"If that's true, I wonder why she would get so pissed about you mentioning it," muttered the blond. The three of them sat mulling over the mystery before something caught Naruto's eye. He waved his hand to get the attention of Inuzuka Kiba who was on the opposite side of the room chatting with some friends. A grin spread across his face as he walked over to join them. He bumped his fist against Naruto's shoulder and then nodded to Sasuke and Sai.

"How rare to see the esteemed Hokage in a place like this. Hey, isn't Sakura with you?" he greeted them, searching for the flash of pink. But then he seemed to read the strange mood.

"Hey, Kiba, have you noticed anything weird about Sakura lately?" inquired Naruto.

"Huh?" Kiba immediately said in response as he scratched his head, "Why would you ask me that? I haven't seen her since my check-up at the hospital when we got home," he immediately answered. And then his narrowed in on Sasuke who seemed to be more brooding than usual.

"Uh oh. Spill, Uchiha," Kiba ordered, plopping down on the empty stool next to Sasuke. When he saw how strangely the guys were looking at him, Kiba shrugged.

"Hey, I dated her for half a year. I've seen what people look like after she tears them a new one. So?"

There was silence in return. Kiba sighed.

"Sasuke commented on Sakura's drinking," Sai finally piped up. Kiba only seemed to grow more perplexed.

"Why? What's wrong with her drinking?" he probed.

"She drinks a lot," Sasuke flatly retorted. Kiba scrutinized Sasuke heavily for a moment before he shook his head.

"Look, man. I think this is because the two of you have never really been around to see this but Sakura's always been an alcohol kind of girl," sighed Kiba as he pointed at Sasuke and then at Naruto. Naruto looked flabbergasted.

"Me? Why me? I've always been there for Sakura! What would you know that I don't?" the blond demanded with a scowl. Kiba arched an eyebrow at him.

"Leaving for training right after Sasuke left the village? Did you think she wouldn't feel even a little abandoned?" jabbed Kiba. Naruto recoiled a little.

"I was doing it for us. So I'd be strong enough to protect the both of us," he answered, suddenly looking down at his hands.

"That might not be how she feels about it. And anyway, while you two were off frolicking and training, the only person Sakura really had to support her was the Godaime. And we all know how she deals with her issues," Kiba went on to say.

"Oh," said Naruto.

Sasuke didn't say anything. But his eyes narrowed. There wasn't any accusation in Kiba's voice. But maybe that was why it stung so much. It was stated so simply, so bluntly.

"So you're saying that it's an adorable quirk and that we should just leave her alone?" Sasuke replied after a tense moment. The hostility in Sasuke's stare wasn't matched by Kiba at all. In fact, Kiba looked bewildered.

"What? No, man. I'm saying that maybe you should start thinking of why she is the way she is instead of just complaining about it."

Naruto almost looked offended.

"I'm her best friend. Why wouldn't she talk to me?" he muttered mostly to himself. At this, the laugh that escaped Kiba sounded strangely hard.

"You think she'll burden you with all her problems? No chance, Hokage-sama. Even I know that much," he snorted.

Staring down at his drink, Sasuke didn't say anything.

* * *

><p>Emptiness never scared her. It was the pause between breaths. It was the sound between sounds.<p>

She tapped her pointer finger against the side of her beer. A drop of cool condensation ran down the metal and landed on her nail. She breathed deeply, soaking in the sounds of the night. The crickets were singing and the cicadas let out high cries that almost blended into one another. There were faraway voices too from people walking down the street. But those fell in a decrescendo and eventually faded.

It had been nearly two weeks since she had last spoken to Sasuke.

The soft tap of the rain was soothing. Closing her eyes, Sakura leaned back in her chair and just listened. With the bustle of the hospital constantly ringing in her ears, just the quiet of nature was a welcome relief. She had pulled a double-shift that bled over into today and now her body protested. She had promptly stumbled home after leaving the usual flowers at Sasuke's parents' place and fallen asleep face-down on the sofa. A cold dinner of rice and pickled vegetables along with some grilled fish had been followed by a couple cold beers.

Abruptly, the drizzling stopped. Sakura opened her eyes and tilted her face toward the window. And the stupid words just slipped out of her mouth.

"Ah, I want to see him," she sighed. With the warm buzz of alcohol humming in her veins, Sakura licked her lower lip. Tossing back the rest of her beer, she headed outside for a walk. The warm night air felt nice against her skin. The air felt clean right after the rain. The buildings glistened with a sheen of water, making them sparkle. She cut through the market, glancing at the stalls selling food late at night and breathing in the smells of cooking oil and fried dough.

Without much thought, she headed up to the apartment on the west end of the market. She climbed in through the window and carefully stepped over the trip wires set up right by the wall. He was already curled up on his bed, back to her. The slight hitch in his slow, easy breathing was greeting enough. She climbed into bed, curling up against his back and listening to his sigh. His sheets were cool and smelled clean. She yawned once.

"What're you doing?" he asked in a surprisingly clear voice.

"Being drunk. Good night," she answered.

She felt his silent snort against her back.

"Happy birthday, Sasuke-kun," Sakura murmured sleepily. His shoulders tensed. And then, suddenly, the mattress was shifting as Sasuke flipped over to look at her. Her eyes fluttered open when she heard Sasuke whisper her name. The weight of his stare on her crushed her chest so much that words wouldn't leave her mouth.

"I'm sorry," Sakura whispered into the darkness. Eyes squeezed shut, she counted her heartbeats. Was it shame burning her cheeks or something else? The breath she sucked in through her mouth felt cloyingly sweet.

"Sorry," he murmured back.

Suddenly trembling, Sakura tried to bite back the beginnings of tears. But the traitorous drops trickled out and she knew that Sasuke could see them. A shaking breath was all it took for her to break into little, soundless sobs. Curled up on her side and facing him, she cried and cried in the way that a child does without reason and without foreseeable end.

Sasuke pressed his forehead to hers, his arm draped lightly across her waist. His eyelashes brushed against hers, a tickling sensation in the haze of her tears. Feeling so immature and stupid, Sakura cried for a long time until her cheeks stung. There was some relief in those sobs and maybe even some words of remorse. But it was mostly pain.

She cried for a long time with that intimate but awkward distance separating her from Sasuke.

* * *

><p>Thanks for reading this chapter. Reviews are always appreciated.<p>

School is starting up soon and I'm taking way too many credits (as usual). Rest assured, this fic will not be abandoned...Somehow...


	11. Bush Clover

Hello, darlings. It's been a while. Is it sad to admit that it took me so long to work on this one chapter because I just couldn't get it to flow right? There's still a lot of issues with this one just because I haven't spent as much time tweaking it as I'd like but I figured I owed everyone an update before I die during midterms.

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 11: Bush Clover

The sticky feeling of eyes swollen after a night of crying was never pleasant. Cringing against the morning sun that bore down on her face, Sakura pressed the heel of her hand against her swollen left eyelid.

She hadn't woken up disoriented or confused. There had been no momentary panic from the feeling of her fingers lightly tangled with Sasuke's. Their hands were between them, the only parts of their bodies touching at all. She tugged her hand free, knowing that Sasuke was already awake. Breathing out a heavy sigh, she finally managed to crack her eyes open. A low noise, a groan, really, slipped out past her lips.

"I don't want to go to work," she croaked for the first time in many years. Normally she would grudgingly yet quietly haul herself out of bed to get ready for the day. But this morning, the idea of submerging herself into the sterile chaos of the hospital was entirely unappealing. The small grunt that answered her elicited a small laugh from her. She turned her head to the left to look at Sasuke. One of his arms was thrown over his head. And through the messy nest of his dark hair, she thought she saw his eye glaring out at her for a moment.

"I have a liver transplant scheduled in..." Sakura paused to roll over to look at the clock, "half an hour." There was another grunt. It took some effort, but Sakura sat up. Raking her fingers through her hair, she glanced down at Sasuke.

"I'm guessing you don't have any food so I'm going home," said Sakura. She swung her legs over the edge of the bed to stand.

For one moment, Sakura felt a little awkward. Did she say something else? Did she thank him for letting her sleep there or did she apologize for barging in? But that lingering awkwardness faded when she realized that Sasuke was very obviously watching her. Despite the fact that he could barely pass as a functional human this early in the morning, his eye was intently following her movements. He wasn't really sure how to react either. Smiling, Sakura patted his forearm.

"I'll see you later," was all she said before she climbed out the window, from the way she had come in. Darting through alleys and hopping across roofs made it easy for her to get home. She stood under the hot spray of the shower and then wolfed down a protein bar before rushing off to the hospital. Yanking on her coat and dealing with the problems that had arisen in the hospital during the night, Sakura made her way to the operating room.

Everything up to her elbows was soaked in deep red by the time she clocked out.

Sakura rushed home, throwing herself into the shower to scrub herself clean. She stared at the pink water swirling down the drain, slightly disgusted with herself for not reacting to the sight at all. But the visceral reaction she used to have to blood, to the human body, had grown so dull that she barely batted an eye at the open chest cavities of cadavers. The methodical scrub to cleanse her skin had become automatic with time as well.

Clean and tingling, Sakura went to the flower shop to pick the usual bouquet. Ino's mother smiled knowingly, sending her best wishes to Sakura's parents as she rang up the order. Sakura walked slowly, the heels of her shoes dragging through the dirt path as she trudged along the darkening streets.

But this time, as she sat in front of that familiar shrine, as she sat staring into the gentle smile of a woman she found alien and familiar all at once, Sakura felt the strangest urge to cry.

"You've raised a good son, you know," Sakura suddenly stated. As if to mock her, she suddenly remembered the terrible things she had said to him weeks ago. Those twisting, gouging barbs that were unforgivable at best.

"He's not perfect," Sakura amended, "But he's trying his best."

That sounded better. And Sasuke's mother's smile seemed a notch brighter.

At home, Sakura headed straight to the fridge to pop open a can of beer. Gulping down the foamy beverage, she let out a deep sigh. The dull ache of pain in her abdomen worried her a little but it disappeared as suddenly as it had come. She rubbed thoughtfully at her stomach. A quick probe of chakra told her that nothing was wrong with any of her organs. And the pain never lasted enough for it to be truly alarming. A quick sensation and then it was gone.

"I hope it's not an ulcer," she grumbled.

Sai was nowhere to be seen. The quiet of the house was a little lonely. As repairs were ongoing in the north, there were still no contractors to be found in the village. And part of Sakura thought that she wouldn't mind if he never found someone to repair his roof. It was nice to not have to listen to the empty house groaning and creaking by itself. Even the faint thump of his footsteps as he walked around was a nice companion after work.

Eyes bloodshot, head pounding, Sakura shed her clothes and crawled into bed in just her underwear and bra. It was far too early to be sleeping. She hadn't had dinner and there was a mountain of laundry to do. But she slept, deeply and without dreams.

Twelve hours later, she was roused by the sound of the front doorknob twisting. The snap of the metal lock was startlingly clear to her even in her slumber. Hand instinctively clenching into a fist, she rose onto her elbows in preparation to pounce. But then she recognized Sai's chakra signature and slumped back down on her bed. With a sigh, she pulled her pillow over her head and cocooned herself in her covers. She waited for the soft knock on her door. It swung open and Sai peered inside.

"There was a breech. We had to investigate. Turned out it was just a drunk Jounin," he explained without greeting. Rubbing at his tired eyes, he mumbled that he was going to sleep and was off to his room in the attic.

Sakura lay in bed for a couple extra minutes. Finally when she saw the clock, she sighed and rolled onto the floor. She crawled into the shower, letting the hot spray pound against the knotted muscles in her shoulders and back for a while before she actually got to washing her hair and body. Breakfast was unheated leftovers from the fridge before she headed off to the hospital.

The cold sterility wrapped around her body, plunging into her joints and making her eyes feel oddly dried out. Nothing could eliminate the stiffness in her body and the papery feeling she got rubbing her fingertips together.

Just before lunch break, Sakura felt an odd hitch in her chest. A rough cough rose from deep in her lungs, the sickly kind that usually accompanied a bad cold. She checked her temperature but everything seemed to be fine. The cough only occurred every couple hours before disappearing again. Still, the sound was bad enough that Takumi heard it as he walked past and stopped mid-step to stare at her. She waved him off in a brisk movement and he reluctantly went on to do his work.

Sakura stared at the clipboard in her hands.

"Be sure to get the patient in 313 his medication on time. And remind the nurses to sign in and out properly," Sakura called out to no one in particular. Still, there was a chorus of responses and that was enough to satisfy her. Sakura stepped into her office, rubbing at her stained green scrubs. She let out a sigh when she saw Kiba sitting in her spinning chair with his feet up on her desk. Akamaru barked in greeting, trotting up to nuzzle against her hand.

"Hey there, buddy. How're you doing?" she greeted as she stroked his fluffy neck. Then she looked toward Kiba again.

"And you, dirty feet stay off the desk. What're you doing here anyway? I thought the smell of the hospital bothered you," Sakura said. Kiba slid his feet to the floor and then fixed her with such a level look that it threw her off.

"Is something the matter?" she inquired.

"You know, you've always liked Akamaru more than you like me," Kiba finally complained. Sakura rolled her eyes. She walked past him to her bookshelf, bumping the chair aside with her hip on her way to grab one of her encyclopedias to take home.

"Maybe because Akamaru doesn't drool on the pillow and steal all the blankets," retorted Sakura.

"Hey, I keep telling you, I can't sleep if I'm cold," he answered.

"Says the human furnace," snorted Sakura. At this, Kiba grinned sheepishly. It was true that his body temperature ran a little high. Whether it had something to do with his genes or if it was just a Kiba thing was something Sakura had never quite figured out. But then Kiba's expression sobered and she picked up on the fact that maybe this wasn't just a pleasant hello. Forehead creasing, Sakura hugged the book to her chest as she turned around to fully face him.

"Is everything okay?" he inquired. Sakura cocked her head to one side.

"Yeah, of course. Why wouldn't everything be okay?" was her immediate response.

Kiba scratched the back of his head.

"You know, I ran into Uchiha a few days back and seemed like something'd gone down between you two. And no offense, Sakura, but you're not looking too chipper," he told her with visible reluctance. When he met her eyes, he gave her another rueful smile.

"None of my business?" he guessed. Eyebrows arched, Sakura nodded. Kiba let out a sigh.

"You always were a big girl. Nothing I need to beat him up for?" said Kiba. Sakura nodded again. Shaking his head, Kiba crossed his arms behind his head.

"It's not such a bad thing to rely on others, you know," he commented.

"It's not such a bad thing to rely on yourself either," she replied. Exchanging smiles, they ended the conversation in this manner. Sakura then circled her finger in the air, signaling for both of them to turn around. Akamaru obeyed, even putting his paw over his eyes. Kiba spun around in the chair, only he snuck a little peek, earning a slap on the arm from Sakura. She pulled her dirty scrubs off and slipped back into her regular black dress. Wadding the scrubs up into a ball to dump into a laundry bin, Sakura gathered up her things so she could go home.

Kiba walked her out of the hospital with Akamaru leading the way a few paces up ahead. Sakura felt his worried glances on the side of her face more then once. But he knew not to pry. He already knew that sometimes, for her, anyway, just having someone notice that something was off was enough to make things a lot easier for her.

"You're not such a bad guy, Kiba," remarked Sakura.

It was Kiba's turn to snort with laughter. He waved once before turning and heading home with Akamaru at his heels.

* * *

><p>Part of being Hokage, Naruto decided, was running away from responsibilities. He was glad that Sakura couldn't read his thoughts because she would fix him with a patronizing stare until he squirmed and sighed all the way back to do his work. But there was only so much schmoozing and paper-signing one man could do before his left butt cheek began to go numb.<p>

Suppressing his chakra just enough to escape notice, Naruto walked along the halls of the tower. He kept his ears pricked up for the telltale tap of Sakura's heels. A few months back, she had made it a point to visit frequently either with a carton of milk or with some sort of snack. She pretended that it was to scold him and to check to see if he was working. But really it was for the company (because they had been together so often in the past that seeing one without the other had become somewhat of a rarity).

However, as of late, Sakura could only be described as grumpy and he didn't think that even he, the Hokage, could live through one of her beatings if he happened to get on her bad side.

Naruto knew for a fact that she and Sasuke had made up. Sai's reports of her being significantly less irritated at home, and his own infrequent sightings of Sasuke, made it clear that things had cleared up between the two. If anything, the way that Sasuke's gaze grew shifty when the topic came to Sakura, was indication that maybe something else was going on. But the Hokage never had enough time to mercilessly grill his friend about that topic before more work popped up.

So Naruto was startled when he realized that he could feel Sakura's chakra signature very nearby. Had he been so engrossed in his own thoughts that he hadn't recognized his best friend?

Curiosity piqued, he followed the presence upstairs where he knew that the more classified texts were stored under surveillance. Naruto nodded to Kotetsu and Izumo, who were on guard duty at the double doors leading to the archives. They bowed in response before the duo went back to peeking into the room. Naruto squeezed in below them to get a look too.

Sakura sat at the wooden table in the middle of the room. All of the walls were covered in bookshelves and the back room was also open, revealing shelves stuffed with scrolls. Her hair was pulled back in a braid. She wasn't even in her usual work attire. Instead, the loose black shirt with sleeves pushed up to her elbows made her look small and faded.

"Wow, she looks exhausted," Kotetsu remarked. Izumo nodded. Naruto stared at Sakura's profile as she flipped through books. The dark circles under her eyes and the slump of her normally straight back made his gut twinge.

"She must have pulled an all-nighter," Naruto remarked. Izumo shook his head.

"Doc says she got in eight hours last night. She thinks it's the flu or something," said Izumo in a whisper.

"That's why she's steering clear of the hospital for today," Kotetsu added.

Just then, a horrible, rasping cough escaped from her mouth. Sakura bent over, hands clamped to her mouth and her forehead touching the tabletop. The twist of her body was visible pain. But the attack seemed to pass quickly and she soon righted herself to wipe the tears from her eyes. She cleared her throat once and then resumed her reading.

"Sounds like she's got a hell of a flu there," muttered Naruto. Stroking his chin he wondered if there was a way for him to find out if Sakura was okay without her waving him off like she always did. But then, it occurred to him that being Hokage meant he could boss people around much more freely.

'Hey, can one of you get a hold of Yamanaka Ino for me? I've got a little mission for her," said Naruto. Kotetsu and Izumo stared at him and then at each other before Kotetsu nodded.

* * *

><p>By the time autumn had settled in a chilly blanket across Fire Country, Sakura found herself signing off on a transfer request for Nozomi. Though the girl's training was far from over, Sakura knew that Nozomi had absolutely no interest in dealing with patients directly. Her heart was into the cold science of chemical compounds. It was the actual medicine that Nozomi thrived on. So Sakura signed her official shift to the research branch of the hospital staff. The only thing that changed really was the slightly increased paycheck and the fact that she now got to ditch the blue scrubs she so hated in favor of just her white lab coat over whatever clothes she wanted.<p>

Sakura sent Nozomi off one morning with the paperwork for her transfer. Once the files were handed over to the head of pathology, Nozomi would technically no longer be under Sakura's tutelage. And that was fine with Sakura. She had overseen the training of countless young staff here at the hospital.

But Nozomi was special, just as Kei was. Although Takumi was her only real apprentice, it didn't change the fact that all three of them had been and still were very dear to her. Sakura wondered more and more these days if that was why Tsunade had always seemed to need Shizune just as much as Shizune had needed her.

It was quiet that day. Sakura sat in her office, staring down at her coffee as it cooled and she didn't even move to take a sip. Takumi stood in the doorway watching her. After a length, he crossed the room to stand in front of her desk.

"You have a patient waiting for you, Sensei," he reminded her gently. Sakura nodded almost absently. She pushed her mug aside as she go to her feet.

"...I'm not going anywhere, Sensei," Takumi suddenly added. Sakura blinked a couple times. Then she turned to look at her apprentice.

"I know," was all she said. Patting his arm once, she gave him a smile.

"Of course you wouldn't. Scrub up. I want you to assist me for that surgery in an hour," Sakura ordered, back to her chipper and bossy self.

Ino dropped by the hospital a few days later, armed with a box of macaroons in case Saura tried to kick her out. Sakura took one look at her friend standing at the nurse's station, opened up her mouth, and then promptly shut it again when she saw the bright green cookie offered up to her. Glaring, she chomped down on the offering and signaled for Ino to talk as she chewed.

"Dinner with Chouji and me? Bring that brooding icicle of yours," Ino ordered more than she offered. Sakura began to worry until Ino added that Shikamaru was coming as well and laughed that this wasn't an elaborate excuse for a forced double-date.

Sakura rolled her eyes as she shoved one of the macaroons into Ino's mouth to shut her up.

They met up at a Shabu-shabu* restaurant located on one of the many twisting back roads of the market. The time was set for 7. Sasuke was early, already waiting in front of the building when Ino and Chouji arrived with Shikamaru in tow. Shikamaru had the look of someone who was more threatened or bribed into coming than an eager diner. But after Sasuke nodded respectfully to the couple, Shikamaru clapped him on the shoulder. Ino watched all of this with a sharp eye.

And when Sakura hopped off the nearest roof, slightly out of breath and hair messy a few minutes later, she landed right next to Sasuke. She put her hand on his shoulder as she took off her right shoe.

"Sorry. My schedule got pushed back because of a mix-up. I should start stapling charts to the nurses' hands," Sakura explained while turning her shoe upside down to shake out a pebble. Her wet hair was falling out of its messy twist and falling into her face. Letting out a huff through his nose, Sasuke reached over and held her hair out of her eyes so she could actually see what she was doing.

"You smell like cologne," Sasuke remarked in a barely noticeable voice. In the middle of shaking her shoe harder to dislodge the rock, Sakura wrinkled her nose. She had shed her white coat and put on a thick gray cardigan with brass buttons. Sakura sniffed herself- her arms, her sweater.

"Ah. Dad of the patient. He hugged me when he caught me in the lobby on my way out," she told him. Sakura's hand was still on his shoulder as she peered up at him. She crammed her foot back into her shoe, satisfied that the rock was gone. Sasuke tried to tuck her bangs behind her ear but they just swung forward again. The sour look he gave her hair made her laugh.

"Ooh, dad of the patient? Was he hot?" Ino butted in with a mischievous grin. She had expected the duo to jump apart in full embarrassment. But Sasuke barely glanced her way while Sakura only smiled. But she did subtly slip from Sasuke's grasp. She yanked her bangs back and tied them in quick, practiced motions so they wouldn't be in her way.

"Shut up, Ino. Poor Chouji looks like he's going to starve to death," answered Sakura. Chuckling at her comment, they headed inside to the warmth of the restaurant.

They took up a table in the back corner where the door opening and closing wouldn't bombard them with cold air every few minutes. Ino and Chouji slid into the booth while Sakura sat across from them in one of the chairs. Sasuke pulled a chair over to the end between Sakura and Ino and looked ready to sit alone on the end. But then Shikamaru let out a large yawn and plopped down in the seat.

"Sit down next to me, if you can endure it," teased Sakura as she pointed at the open chair. By the time Sasuke was settled, Ino and Chouji were already jabbering excitedly over the menu.

"We'll need about 30 orders of meat," Shikamaru sighed mostly under his breath. Sakura tried her best not to laugh at the absolutely true remark. She then leaned over towards Sasuke to peek at which page of the menu he was looking at.

"I'm going to order about a billion mushrooms and a billion pieces of tofu. What about you?" she inquired softly. The menu didn't move but Sasuke's gaze flickered immediately to her and then back.

"Chrysanthemum leaves. Onions," he responded.

"Ooh! Good idea. Guys, Sasuke says we're getting chrysanthemum leaves and onions," announced Sakura in a louder voice.

"Supreme taste, Sasuke-dono," Ino commended him. By the time the waiter came over to take their order, Ino had manged to talk Chouji out of ordering every type of meat offered on the menu.

"Anything to drink?" asked the waiter after he had jotted down everything.

"Wine!" Ino promptly chirruped.

"Wine with Shabu-shabu? What's wrong with you?" Sakura scolded as she smacked Ino with the menu. She smiled apologetically at the waiter who smiled back in response.

"Then I guess we'll have some beers then," Shikamaru cut in before Ino could make another ridiculous suggestion. A chorus of agreement met him as the menus were handed back to the waiter.

"Oh and can we get two hot teas?" Sakura said last minute. Nodding, the waiter scribbled this down too and then left to put in their orders to the kitchen.

"So," Ino loudly said, cutting through all conversation once the beers had arrived. All eyes went to her.

"I know all about how Shikamaru and Chouji are doing but what about you two? I haven't seen you around at the Intelligence Department at all, Sasuke," demanded Ino. Chouji and Shikamaru exchanged sighs as they distributed the beers to everyone. The tea arrived too and Sakura slid one over to Sasuke.

"I didn't ask for one," he informed Sakura.

"I know. But you like tea with your food, right?" she responded. Sasuke didn't say anything to answer that but took a sip from his warm ceramic mug. Ino's eyes narrowed in on this exchange too until Sakura reclaimed her attention with a flick to the forearm.

"Well, little piggy-pig, I've been good. I recently signed off on Nozomi's transfer to pathology so it's taken some jostling to fill in her spot," said Sakura.

"That's Ginkaku, right? Short. Curly hair?" Shikamaru queried. Sakura nodded.

"I liked her. She was a smart kid. Really pretty too," Ino added.

"But it looks like your new training program with the hospital's been going well, Sakura-chan. My cousin went in with a broken arm the other day and he said a trainee fixed him right up," Chouji piped up. Sakura tried to wave his comment off but her proud grin revealed it all.

The conversation took a completely different turn when the food arrived. They were so occupied with cooking the food and dipping it into sauces and squabbling over who got the last slice of beef that there wasn't much time for other words. But as the meal wound down with only Chouji left eating, Ino leaned back in her chair, sipping on her third beer. The pink flush to her cheeks was darker than anyone else's. Sakura popped open her fourth drink with a little help from chakra to her fingers.

"Naruto's reforms have been making a lot of noise," Ino offered up, throwing the new topic into the open.

"Yeah. Having the elders retire and replacing them with an advisory council was a bold move," commented Chouji. But Shikamaru's face was less light-hearted as he opened his mouth to speak.

"Appointing clan heads as leaders will make him a lot of allies. The previous system stripped a lot of the clans of power so this will quell a lot of the dissent," Shikamaru pointed out.

With Shikamaru's father serving as his personal advisor, Naruto had busied himself overhauling a large part of the system of leadership for the village. One of the first things Naruto had done after being sworn in was sit in the Hokage's private archives and read through the history of secret operations orchestrated in the shadows including the Uchiha massacre.

"Never again," he had uttered in a fierce whisper. Even Sakura didn't have the clearance to access these files, the look on Naruto's face had told her enough.

"If a tree is rotten from the root, trimming its branches and giving it fertilizer won't fix anything," Kakashi had once told them, "You need to dig up the roots and plant another tree instead."

"Must be lonely. You two were always stuck together," Ino suddenly said.

"It's not like we don't see each other. And besides, I've got this one to keep me company," laughed Sakura as she tapped Sasuke's arm with the back of her hand. Sasuke, who, until this point, had been a silent listener rather than an active participant in the conversation, sighed and shook his head.

"Who says I'm willing to put up with you?" he uttered.

Ino's jaw dropped.

"Hey. Don't be a jerk, Sasuke," replied Sakura. He smirked the instant before taking a sip of beer. They clinked their bottles together while Ino scrutinized them with the strictness of a disapproving mother-in-law.

"Ah, speaking of lonely, you seem pretty down in the dumps lately, Sakura," Ino interjected. Sakura arched an eyebrow.

"What? I'm not 'down in the dumps'. What are you smoking, Ino?" scoffed Sakura.

"I don't know. My mom says you came by the store the other day and you looked pretty depressed. What, empty nest getting to you?" Ino continued. But as the last words left her lips, a look of horror came over Ino's face. Eyes widening, she clapped her hands over her mouth.

"Sakura, I'm so sorry," Ino blurted out.

"What're you apologizing for, you weirdo?" responded Sakura. And with a laugh and light-hearted tone, she easily persuaded a tipsy Ino that it was fine. The rest of dinner went on smoothly. The guys were puzzled by this odd exchange but knew better than to ask about the secrets kept between women. Ino occasionally cast guilty looks in Sakura's direction but Sakura reached across the table to pat her hand and that seemed comfort enough.

Once all the food was gone and no one ordered more beers, they split the bill and got to their feet.

They parted ways outside the restaurant. Sakura didn't miss the pointed look Ino, Chouji, and Shikamaru exchanged before Ino reminded Shikamaru that he had to pick up something for his mother at Chouji's place. The trio essentially fled, leaving Sakura and Sasuke standing there feeling more amused than confused.

"Ive got work in the morning so I'll see you la..." Sakura trailed off when she realized that Sasuke had his hands in his pockets and was already strolling off in the direction of her house.

"You really don't have to," she said half-heartedly. Then, letting out a sigh, she hurried a few steps to catch up with him.

They walked along in the darkness. Each time they passed under a streetlight, they were bathed in a pool of muted orange. Their shadows glided along in front of them, wavering smudges of black against the dirt. Sakura stared at the way her shadow always touched the edge of Sasuke's but never quite overtook it.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she answered with a bright smile that shone too brilliantly as she quickly looked up. Even so, her hands clenched at her sides. Sasuke noticed, of course. His gaze flickered down to her fists so she quickly turned away.

"Sakura," Sasuke called, his voice sharper than she was used to. Sakura turned to look at him, eyes burning defiantly. But she saw that his expression wasn't needlessly cruel or sharp. In fact, he looked forlorn.

"What aren't you telling me?" he asked.

"There are a lot of things I can't tell you, Sasuke-kun."

"Why?"

"Because I'm so afraid you'll break."

He looked defiant. He looked angry. He even looked a little hurt. But he seemed to swallow down this truth with surprising resignation. And to soothe the sting from her words, Sakura reached out for his hand. She half-expected him to knock her away. Instead he let her slip her fingers between his. With a pained smile, Sakura stared up into his face.

The wrinkle between his eyebrows was somewhat sad to look at.

Sakura took a deep breath. And as her chest swelled, she thought she saw something like understanding glimmering in Sasuke's gaze.

"Yeah," he uttered softly before they walked back to her house.

Their fingers untangled slowly as Sakura pushed the small metal gate open. Sasuke followed her all the way to the door. She smiled at him and he returned it with a nod. Sakura slipped inside, trying her best not to let her hands shake. As the door swung close, Sakura had the strangest feeling she was about to cry. Just before the door shut completely, Sasuke's arm darted in. He shoved the door open, eyes already scrutinizing her expression.

"What?" she demanded, heat rising to her face.

His hand rose to touch her cheek. He examined his fingertips, checking for traces of moisture.

"Nothing," he finally replied.

He had thought she was crying.

Since when had Uchiha Sasuke been so concerned over her insignificant mood swings? Her heart swelled and squeezed so uncomfortably that she almost wanted to throw her hands up in the air and give up completely.

"I can't have kids," she suddenly admitted.

The strange pause in the air was tangible. Sakura could feel Sasuke's relief at being confided in, his confusion, and even the resulting irritation from being confused. She stood patiently searching the myriad of emotions running across his face before his eyes focused in on her again.

"Wait, what?" he demanded.

"That scar from my fight with Akasuna no Sasori- the one on my stomach. I was impaled through part of my uterus. It messed things up really badly. And I can't carry a child. I don't even get periods anymore," explained Sakura. She saw Sasuke's gaze flicker down to her flat abdomen and then back up to her face.

"...I know that's really bad. But why keep it a secret?" he finally asked in response. The query startled Sakura a little.

"Oh. Well. This isn't really a conversation for out here. Come on," Sakura answered, tugging at his hand. Sasuke could have easily broken free from her grasp but instead he let her drag him further into the house. The only sign of resistance he gave was a slightly dubious expression. And even then, since her back was to him, she didn't notice.

The inside of her house smelled like laundry soap and lemons. The soap was from the freshly-folded sheets and towels folded on top of the sofa- Sai's handiwork. And the lemon was from her white coat soaking in the juice inside the kitchen sink. Sakura pushed her high heels off to the side before peeking into the living room. There was a slight thump. Then, Sai's head was peeking down from the attic. His dark eyes flitted from her to Sasuke behind her. He gave a nod to the other man before focusing on Sakura.

"We're down to our last roll of toilet paper. And we're almost out of soy sauce," was all Sai said to her. Smiling fondly, Sakura rolled her eyes.

"I had a nice day, Sai. Thanks for asking. I'll go pick some more up when I go shopping tomorrow," responded Sakura with a wry look. Sai stared at her for an extra moment before he glanced at Sasuke again.

"Should I go visit Naruto?" Sai suddenly queried. Sakura tried her best not to laugh while Sasuke shot her an inquisitive look.

"Why?" It was Sasuke that asked the question.

"Did you need the privacy?"

At this, Sasuke seemed to turn slightly red as he cleared his throat.

"Shut up, Sai. You're so gross. Do you want something to drink too?" Sakura groaned.

"I'll pass. Thank you," Sai shortly responded. Then his head disappeared around the corner and they heard him quietly walk back up the stairs to the attic.

Sasuke sunk into one of the kitchen chairs while Sakura filled the kettle with water. She set it on the stove and waited for water to boil. Sakura pressed her elbows to the counter and leaned over it. Her spine curved forward as she stared out the window into her backyard. Sheets left on the line outside flapped in the wind. A ghostly phantom of white against the dark blue of the night. But soon the kettle let out a high-pitched whistle and she filled two cups with water. In one she dropped a teabag and the other she scooped in instant coffee.

Sasuke's eyes followed her as she turned and crossed the room to set the cups down.

"Sit. If you can endure it," uttered Sasuke, echoing her words from earlier in the night. She honestly tried her best not to smile. But Sasuke always remembered what she said. It was a little odd that careless comments she threw out were the ones Sasuke always seemed to keep in mind. It was nice to be heard.

Sakura doused her beverage in sugar and smirked at the way Sasuke looked absolutely disgusted by the idea of making coffee sweet.

Sitting at the kitchen table, she watched him through the steam rising from her coffee. The hollow _taptaptap_ of her spoon against the tabletop drew his eye. She let the metal utensil drop, nudging it to the side with the tips of her fingers. The intensity of his gaze almost made her uncomfortable. She still wasn't used to his eyes- the light, almost transparent sepia that colored them.

They were beautiful.

She sometimes wondered if they had been beautiful for his brother too.

"He's still living here?" Sasuke finally asked. With his question, his eyes flickered up to the ceiling. Every once in a while, the light creak of footsteps could be heard

"Mhm. I don't mind. He helps with the cleaning and he cooks pretty well too," she replied. Sakura was beginning to understand his subtle looks The slight downward curve of Sasuke's mouth was visible to her now.

"What? You don't like him living with me?" she inquired. Sasuke's glare told her she had guessed correctly.

"Don't be so jealous, Sasuke-kun," teased Sakura. And with her light-hearted smile, she lifted her feet and let them rest on top of his. It was to his credit that he didn't flinch. But his questioning stare was clear enough.

"My feet are cold," was all she stated.

The way he abruptly pulled his legs apart made her heels hit the floor with a heavy thud. The sound hurt. And before the pain could filter up, she felt his feet moving to rest on top of hers. He avoided her eyes but the action was enough. Mouth stretching into a wry smile, Sakura avoided his gaze too.

There was a thump as she slipped her feet out from under Sasuke's. His soles hit the floor and he shot her a glare out of the corners of his eyes.

"Your feet are too heavy," she announced and reclaimed her perch on top of his feet.

They sat that way, Sakura blowing on her coffee to cool it and Sasuke turning his mug around and around in his hands, never touching his beverage. It was only later that Sakura realized that it was the closest she had ever felt to Sasuke before.

Though Sasuke had come inside to talk about the matter of her infertility, the conversation never even drifted close to there. Instead, they talked about the past. They remembered first missions and ridiculous things that only children could pull off. She recounted the times they had spent running around the village chasing the same cat time after time.

"I hope it finally got away. Poor beast must've been miserable," Sasuke remarked with a sigh. Cheek cupped in her hand, Sakura looked him over carefully.

"I'm sure there was a happy ending," she said.

They reminisced about their days in the academy. Sasuke complained half-seriously about her stalker-like ways. Sakura complained about him constantly picking fights with Naruto and leading to headaches for her. They both made fun of Kakashi. They laughed about their futile attempts to see what was under his mask.

By the time they had run out of things to remember, both their drinks had gone cold. Sakura stared down into her mug with a thoughtful pout twisting her lips.

"Do you think... it's different for other teams?" she tentatively inquired. She looked up to meet Sasuke's searching gaze.

"I mean, the rest of them have been together for almost 10 years. Would it be different to be one of them?" Sakura clarified.

"Do you want to be one of them?" was Sasuke's counter-question. Sakura didn't hesitate to nod.

"I always wish that you hadn't left. I would've been so happy to grow up along with you and Naruto instead of having to pick myself up out of the dirt. But I'm not sad about the way things turned out either," she told him. Sakura lightly poked the back of his hand with her pointer finger.

"Naruto's Hokage, I'm a lot stronger, and you're home. All in all, things haven't ended up too badly," she added. But when her lips pulled into a smile, Sasuke didn't see. He stared down at his hands, clenching and unclenching them over and over. A soft exhalation streamed out past his lips.

"...I'm sorry. I broke everything. I hurt you and Naruto," Sasuke murmured. The tense hunch of his shoulders almost made him look like he was bracing to be hit.

Sakura's conditioned response was to wave the issue aside- to say "it's fine" with a giggle and to move on. But Ino's advice rung in her ears. Maybe denying Sasuke's mistakes and denying his apologies wasn't the best idea. Maybe it was alright not to be the perfect friend sometimes.

Taking a deep breath, Sakura poked Sasuke's hand again until he raised his head to look at her.

"I know you're sorry. And I'm glad that you are. But this isn't something that will disappear with some pretty words, Sasuke," she told him as gently as she could. Sasuke's expression didn't shift but he nodded.

"But," she added and watched his chin lift slightly, "that doesn't mean you're any less important to me. You're just another one of my idiots."

Sasuke left a little after midnight. Sakura walked him to the door, her eyelids drooping and all her expressions softened with exhaustion. They lingered in the foyer for a moment, wading through the possibilities of conversations, searching. It was Sakura that slipped her arms around him in an impulsive hug. She pressed her face into the front of his shirt, eyes drooping shut. And Sasuke lightly hugged her back, his hands never straying down lower than her shoulder blades.

"Good night, favorite idiot," Sakura said as they pulled apart.

Leaning against the doorframe, Sakura stood watching Sasuke walk down the path and out past the metal gate. And the back that she saw had never been closer to her before.

* * *

><p>Stagnant. Stasis.<p>

Sakura stared at the words on the thick, yellowing paper, well aware of the fact that she hadn't gotten through more than half a page in the past hour. But her mind continued to drift to the outside until she finally shut the book and stood to look out the open window. She sucked in a breath between clenched teeth. The musty smell of books was one she normally loved but now she felt suffocated. Everything about her felt brittle and dried up just like these encyclopedias.

The hint of cold in the night air was a welcome surprise when she opened her window. Sakura hesitated at the sill for a moment before she grabbed a throw from the back of her chair. Wrapping the knitted red and orange wool around herself, she climbed out the window and crawled up the side of the house, shutting the window with her foot as she went. She inhaled the smells of woodsmoke and grass.

Once she was up on the roof, she plopped down on the shingles and let out a sigh. Staring out at the village lit up here and there, she almost didn't feel the flicker in the air. It was almost like a slight hum before the flare of chakra signature. She smiled when she recognized Naruto pop into existence beside her.

"Is this seat taken?"

"What're you doing out of your tower, Princess?" she teased. Naruto rolled his eyes at the mere thought of his hectic days. Paperwork was a welcome relief in his crammed schedule. Meeting with advisors, talking to diplomats, and overseeing the division of missions between teams took up a bulk of his time. He now knew why Tsunade had hidden sake behind her stacks of books.

"I managed to sneak out. I had dinner with Hinata-chan and her old man," he explained.

"How'd that go?" queried Sakura with a graimce. Naruto shrugged, leaning back on his elbows.

"He's warming up to me. I think me being Hokage's improved his impression of me... I hope," answered Naruto.

"Give him some time. Hinata's position makes things a little difficult," she reminded him.

"Yeah. There's been talk about me marrying into the clan. The heir or heiress marrying out's never happened before. I'd be fine with that. I took my mom's last name," said Naruto with a shrug.

"...But there aren't many of you left, Naruto. The Uzumaki clan..." she added a little hesitantly. T this, Naruto's grin dimmed a notch. He scratched the back of his head.

"Hinata-chan said the same thing. She's been talking about passing the title on to Neji instead. But she's always worked so hard for it," he sighed.

They sat quietly after that. Sakura didn't have any more words to offer up to him. She put her hand on his shoulder and squeezed lightly, hoping to convey some comfort. His answering smile was assurance enough that he would be fine.

"Enough about me. How are you doing?" asked Naruto after a long pause in their talk.

Her first instinct was to chirrup, "I'm fine" and quickly direct conversation away from herself. But she saw the look in Naruto's eyes. He would see right through her like he always did. Instead of brushing him off, Sakura shrugged a little.

"I'm tired. I kind of feel like I'm sick all the time but I'm not," she admitted.

"Maybe you need a break?" he suggested. Sakura could see him practically itching to pick out the easiest longterm mission he could find and handing it over to her. But she shook her head.

"Take a sabbatical? Not with the way the hospital's running. I've got 50 new trainees in the program and we're still understaffed. I know it'll get better once things calm down a little but I wish the hospital budget could stand to hire more nurses," she answered. Naruto didn't say anything. He had been largely hands-off when it came to the hospital, letting her handle budgets and the like without bothering her. Normally Tsunade had kept all of this under tight control but his absolute trust in Sakura, combined with his lack of medical knowledge, left him with little other option.

"You look thin. Have you been eating?" Naruto suddenly inquired. Sakura stared at him.

"Yes, **mother**. Sai makes sure I eat when I get home," she retorted. Naruto held his hands up in a defensive gesture.

"Well let me know if you want to go searching for rare sunflowers or a weird herb. I'll be sure to send you to a hot springs or a beach or something," said Naruto. Smiling, Sakura shook her head.

"Abusing your power already, Hokage-sama? That doesn't look so good," she teased.

"Shut up," grumbled Naruto as he pushed her with his shoulder.

'My best friend,' thought Sakura as she pressed her arm to his.

How long had it been since she had just sat doing nothing with Naruto? How long had it been since neither of them really had any other ties but the unbreakable friendship they had between them?

"Say, Sakura-chan?" said Naruto all of a sudden. She hummed in response.

"You ever miss being a kid?" he inquired. Without hesitation, Sakura nodded.

"I always couldn't wait to be all grown up. And growing up in a shinobi village doesn't slow you down either," she answered.

"I miss it too. I miss being a shitty little brat," admitted the Hokage. She felt his head drop onto her shoulder. Curled up there, Naruto was more like a tired puppy than a hardened ninja. He had done this before too. Remembering Jiraiya, thinking about his parents' sacrifices, and even puzzling over his lonely childhood- he had struggled through all of these thoughts mostly with Sakura silently sitting at his side. Sometimes he cried. Sometimes he didn't. And sometimes Sakura was the one that cried while his cheeks stayed dry as a desert.

"I miss your stupid face," Sakura told him. She felt rather than saw Naruto's grin.

"You're all sweet and sappy today, Sakura-chan. Did something good happen with Sasuke?" he teased in return.

Sakura smacked his arm and they had a long, loud laugh as they sat there staring up at the sky.

Naruto didn't see Sakura for about a solid month after that. A week into September, he managed to sneak away from his responsibilities to go to the hospital. Part of it was to go visit Sakura and part of it was to show his face to the employees for purely motivational and political reasons. He greeted the nurses at the front desk and paused to chat with some of the doctors he recognized. But to his surprise, Naruto couldn't find Sakura anywhere. Even the nurses were a little unsure about the Chief of Medicine's whereabouts.

Naruto hunted for Sakura in the big building. Her chakra was very distinctive to him but lately the pattern had grown a little strange, making it harder for him to track. Naruto told himself that it was because she had used the Divine Palms and she had explained that the stress screwed with almost everything in her body for a while after. But he figured that if something were really wrong, Sakura wouldn't be stupid enough to hide it.

After some thorough snooping, Naruto found himself near one of the private examination rooms up on the 4th floor. He raised his hand to knock before noticing that the door was slightly ajar.

"Sorry. I thought I was fine," Naruto overheard Sakura say.

"You should really take a break, Sensei," Takumi sighed. Rolling his eyes, Naruto barged into the office, startling no one. Sakura still had her hand on her chest as she tried to even out her breathing.

"Hokage-sama, please be quiet. This is a hospital," Takumi sighed again. At that, Sakura laughed a little, even though her visage twisted in pain from the movement. Her face was completely white and the dark smudges under her eyes only made her seem more pallid. She hadn't looked his bad just a few weeks ago. When she accepted the glass of water Takumi pushed into her hand, her fingers were shaking.

"Have you been pushing yourself again? You look awful," Naruto scolded.

Sakura nodded absently. The agony that had just split through her abdomen had been terrifying. And now that it was reduced to a dull throbbing, she almost found it hard to believe that such pain was possible. This was definitely not an ulcer or a kidney stone. Was it an indication of a tumor or of internal bleeding?

She sat numbly as Takumi took a blood sample to be sent to the lab for analysis. She almost didn't notice the sizzle of her skin healing over before her apprentice even had time to get a bandage. Expression sharpening, Sakura looked over and found that Takumi was staring at her arm. Their eyes met. The fear tinging his gaze told her that she wasn't just imagining things.

"...Was that on purpose, Sensei?" he slowly asked.

"No. I can barely stay standing right now, much less channel chakra," she answered.

Brow furrowing, Sakura picked up another syringe from the metal tray and used it to scratch down her forearm. Droplets of bright red welled up. But then the skin beneath burned hot as it knitted itself together again. The blood evaporated in a hiss, leaving behind nothing but unblemished flesh.

"...Send it to the lab for analysis?" asked Takumi in a rush of words.

"Good idea," answered Sakura in a faint voice. It was at times like this that she really missed Tsunade and Shizune.

* * *

><p>If anyone asked who Haruno Sakura spent the most time with, the answer would easily be her students and fellow staff at the hospital. In the time not managing things there, she was lecturing and doing demonstrations for the new trainees. Outside the hospital, the answer would change. Previously it would have been Naruto, without a doubt. But with his new position as Hokage and hers running the entire medical system of the village, that had changed too. Sai, maybe? But Sai worked strange hours with ANBU. Ino? Ino was wrapped up in her love, spending lots of time planning her wedding.<p>

So, surprisingly yet unsurprisingly, it was most common to see Uchiha Sasuke at Haruno Sakura's side throughout the village.

If they bumped into each other at the market, they bought groceries together, taking time to have some tea. They were regular figures at the food stalls as Sakura fulfilled her promise of taking Sasuke to places that had popped up in his absence. There were always the stares, always the sidelong glances and hushed whispers of gossiping housewives. Some people had the gall to ask Sakura what her parents thought of her choice of company.

"Well, why don't you ask my parents yourself?" Sakura always responded with a venomous smile.

"My mom's not stupid enough to believe those chatty old bats anyway. And my dad trusts my judgment," sniffed Sakura to Sasuke when his brow wrinkled a little.

She cooked pork cutlet for him in late September. With the leaves turning gold and then orange outside, Sakura pounded pork thin and fried the breaded pieces in oil. The color was much better than it had been, though, according to Sasuke, the flavor was about the same. He did dishes without being asked to and she teasingly called him a gentleman. Sai came home and greeted them before slipping upstairs into his room. Sakura followed his movement with her eyes, her expression tight with worry. It bothered her that Sai didn't really seem to like Sasuke. She liked for her friends to get along. Looking back, she saw that Sasuke, in turn, was watching her. Her face unpinched and she offered him a smile to let him know that everything was alright.

Popping open beers, they settled on the sofa with a bowl of popcorn sitting on the coffee table.

("There's this cheesy gore-fest on tonight. Giant ant monsters. Slime monsters. You know," she had told him excitedly.)

Sakura scooted closer, tentatively laying her head on his shoulder. For a moment, Sasuke shifted and she tensed, waiting for him to pull away. Instead he put his arm up on the back of the sofa to better accommodate her.

The TV buzzed on in the dark living room and she delved into the plot of the colorfully-clad characters running back and forth on the screen. The light flickered across their faces, too bright and too florescent. Surprisingly enough, instead of being nervous from this proximity to Sasuke, she felt sleepy. Her eyelids were drooping even though she had had plenty of coffee during the day. The scent of Sasuke's soap and the softness of his shirt under her cheek lulled her into a dazed sort of stupor.

"Do you do this with other guys too?" Sasuke suddenly inquired. She tilted her head to give him a pointed look.

"Are you kidding me? Naruto would drool all over me and Sai wouldn't shut up," she retorted.

"What about..." Sasuke trailed off, looking distinctly shifty-eyed. It took a moment for her sleepy brain to process his words. Her scowl deepened.

"You think anyone else is stupid enough to let me con them into watching bad horror movies with me?" Sakura snapped in return.

She sagged against his arm a few minutes later, completely unconscious.

"Hey, sleep in your bed. You'll catch a cold out here," Sasuke said rather gruffly. He shrugged, trying to jostle her awake. Sakura's head lolled a little but didn't really move anywhere.

"There's no point. She's out for the night," Sai suddenly uttered. Sasuke glanced back, Sharingan already activated, to see Sai sitting on the steps leading up to the attic. After a moment, with some reluctance, the crimson darkened into brown again. Sai cocked his head to one side.

"You never do that to Sakura. Are you still wary of me?" he queried.

"Don't take it personally. I'm wary of a lot of people," was Sasuke's response. Sai cupped his chin in his hand.

"Not her. Is she special?" Sai went on to ask. Sasuke just frowned at him.

"She's special for me. No one takes care of me and physically abuses me like she does. I suppose Sakura is what a mother would be like?" Sai continued on.

At this, Sasuke glanced down at Sakura.

"...a mother?" he repeated mostly under his breath. In that instant, he missed the sharpness in Sai's stare.

"I'm very much like you, Sasuke-san. I treasure very few people. So it would be wise of you not to harm the ones I do trust," Sai added softly. Sasuke's stare snapped back to him, irises bleeding red again. The threat had been unmistakable. But Sai's chakra was placid, showing no hints of aggression. That same, stupid smile was on his face, plastic and polite.

"Well, it's getting late. You should be getting home," Sai suddenly stated in an oddly cheerful voice. He got to his feet and crossed over to the sofa where he easily slipped his left hand under her knees. Sai's right arm looped around her back and he lifted her up. Sakura mumbled incoherently as she roused a little at the movement.

"I'm cold, Sai," she whined faintly. Her forehead rested against Sai's bicep while her fingers twisted lightly into the front of his shirt. The ease with which he carried her belied the familiarity of such actions.

"Yes, yes, Your Highness. Time for bed," he answered lightly. Her responding slap to his arm was barely a brush. As he took a step forward, Sakura tugged on his shirt again.

"Wait," she mumbled. Sai paused. Sakura reached over, batting at Sasuke with a limp arm.

"Are you sleeping on the sofa?" she slurred out, her fingers curling around his forearm. He shook his head.

"I'll see you tomorrow," he answered. Sakura nodded, eyelids drooping shut already.

"Bye-bye, Sasuke-kun," said Sakura in a surprisingly childish voice

Fixing Sasuke with another intense look, Sai carried Sakura into her bedroom and tucked her in.

Sakura slept on, her dreams filled with giant bug monsters and her and Sasuke armed with plasma guns to defeat them all.

* * *

><p>*Shabu-shabu is sort of like hot pot. You dip thin slices of meat into broth to cook them and you also put a variety of vegetables like mushrooms and onions and maybe even noodles and tofu if you're really feeling the hunger.<p>

Thank you, as always, for all the lovely reviews.


	12. Persimmon

I got snowed in this weekend and with everyone busy studying for finals, I finally got a chance to sit down and write. Somehow the cold and snow always really gets my butt into gear for some writing.

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 12: Persimmon

When a bright bolt of lightning lit up the night sky, Sakura inhaled sharply. Cruelly yanked from her slumber, she sat up, shoulders hunching forward. She couldn't even remember what she had been dreaming about. The musical trickle of water streaming down the sides of the house did little to soothe her. The patter of raindrops was numbing but brought no peace. She hadn't been sleeping well lately anyway. Cold sweat dripped down the back of her neck so she reached up to wipe it away.

Sakura pulled her covers down to her lap and then twisted her head to look out the window behind her. Exaggerated shadows of streetlights shining through droplets on the window made strange shapes on her bed and on her arms.

"Sai?" she called out. The door to her room was ajar and she knew that he would be able to hear her even upstairs. The creaky silence of an empty house answered.

That was right. Sai was on a mission again. Something about gathering intelligence out on the western border. She hadn't really been listening that carefully when he woke her at 3 am to tell her just before he left two days ago. Head dropping wearily back into the warm impression on her pillow, she had vaguely mumbled something in response, already asleep before he left the room.

Hands pressing to her ears, she stared at the clock hanging over her dresser. The ticking hands must have been faulty. The journey of that hand around the face must have been slowing down.

"2 am," she whispered to herself like a swear.

Tears leaked out of her eyes without her knowing what she was crying for. And once those had dried up, Sakura stayed awake with her arms wound tightly around herself. She curled her cold toes into the blankets. The bewildering sadness expanded in her chest until she felt her heart might burst.

When Takumi walked into Sakura's office later that morning, he jumped at the sound blaring from the speakers on her shelf. The heavy orchestral music complete with blaring horns and banging timpani was uncharacteristic of her. Normally Sakura couldn't focus without quiet and a cup of coffee to keep her awake. He twisted the volume control to the left until the noise was just a soft rumble in the background. Sakura's chair was facing the window and he could hear her faint humming.

"Sensei?" he cautiously said. He saw her raise a hand to beckon him further inside. When he moved around the desk, he found that there was a huge encyclopedia opened in her lap. The markings in the margins and the other references splayed out haphazardly over her desk made it obvious that she had been there for a while.

"How long have you been here?" he demanded. With a surprisingly light-hearted smile, she counted.

"Hmm... I couldn't fall asleep. So I came here around 3? What time is it now?" said Sakura.

"It's almost 9, Sensei," he told her with a wrinkled forehead. Hugging his clipboard to his chest, he looked at her with such concern that Sakura patted his arm.

"I'm fine. Just a little insomnia," she assured him.

Heaving a sigh, Sakura deposited her book on top of her desk and reached for his clipboard.

"Um, I think it's a fungal infection but I'm not really sure," he quickly told her as she scanned the notes. The clipboard was returned to him and then she folded her hands under her chin.

"Okay. Let's go through the steps together," she began. Breathing a sigh of relief that this hadn't changed, Takumi sat on the edge of the desk as Sakura patiently walked him through protocol as she had always done.

* * *

><p>"Geez, Sakura, you look awful. You look like you could use a lay," declared Ino in a flat voice.<p>

Sakura sputtered into her tea and Hinata hurriedly passed her a napkin.

"Ino-san!" Hinata chided.

It was a rare occasion that all three of them got together. Sitting at a table at a little restaurant tucked into one of the winding back streets of Konoha, they enjoyed the nice weather. Everything echoed faintly of summer, with strong sunshine and mild weather. Only the chill of the morning and the slight warnings of frost late at night detracted from the warmth.

"What?" the blonde demanded without looking up from her list. They were currently picking through names and setting up tables for the reception. With Hinata's wedding set for the following spring, Tenten's scheduled for next month, and Ino's fast approaching in November, Sakura wondered where she would get money for all the gifts.

"Stop bullying Sakura-san," said Hinata. Ino let out a little huff as she crossed a name off her list.

"Fine. Anything else happen in your life lately, dearest Forehead?" Ino inquired in a syrupy tone.

"So I'm crying for no reason. There's that," reported Sakura in a bored voice. She twirled her chopsticks between her fingers, letting them clatter onto the table when she lost interest in the action. When she looked up, Ino was staring at her. The rosy glow of love had yet to fade from Ino's radiant face. Growing suddenly irritated, Sakura glowered at her friend.

"Well it's obvious, Sakura. You have lupus and now you're going to die," answered Ino in an equally calm voice as she continued sorting through the list of names in front of her. But then Sakura saw the spark of worry in Ino's gaze before she looked up.

"Can I put Sai and Sasuke together?" Ino inquired while holding out the chart she had been drawing. It was the arrangement of all the tables for the reception. Ino had written in Sasuke's name at her table and then crossed it out. Her shock momentarily forgotten, Sakura shook her head.

"I don't know why but they've been sort of snippy with each other lately. Better not. Unless you put me as a buffer between them," Sakura recommended. At this, Ino's eyebrows rose high.

"I've never seen the two of them really interacting. How would you know that?" she queried innocently. But Sakura rolled her eyes. She could hear Ino poking around for information a mile away.

"I don't know, Ino. Why do you spend so much time with Shikamaru? It's like... you're friends and friends just hang out together or something ridiculous like that," drawled Sakura with thick sarcasm. With a smug look, Sakura picked up a lump of rice and shoved it into her mouth while Ino fixed her with a glare. Hinata tittered into her hand.

"Well, at any rate, I just feel kind of moody and gross lately. Maybe I should try cutting extra gluten out of my diet. I did that a couple years ago and I think it helped," Sakura continued thinking out loud. But this time, Ino nodded seriously.

"Or you could try what I've been doing. I'm going heavy on lean protein and all my fruits and vegetables. I only eat rice with one meal a day and then I cheat twice a week with dessert. It's pretty easy," Ino suggested as she crossed off another name. Sakura considered this and then groaned loudly.

"Ugh, I just want to lie in bed and sleep all day," she sighed. Hinata looked like she was going to say something but then she shook her head, as if reprimanding herself. Ino noticed this but didn't comment on it. Her sharp eyes took it in and stored it away for later.

"I'm sure you're fine. Maybe you need to get out more. Have a cocktail. Dance in a fancy dress. Something. I don't know," said Ino. Sakura held up her can of beer and shook it once to slosh the inside contents pointedly.

"Here's my cocktail. And my world is the hospital. Maybe we should consider my entertainment your ugly face," teased Sakura in response. Ino slapped Sakura's arm before they broke into laughter. Hinata joined in with her own mirth. It was easier for Ino and Hinata to pretend not to notice the slight shadow in Sakura's smile than to call her out on it. Sometimes the best remedy for these kinds of problems was just to pretend not to see them.

And other times, it was best to look for a real cure. With her headaches and dizziness becoming worse, Sakura felt immensely relieved when results came back from the lab.

Takumi handed Sakura the sealed envelope with an expression pinched with anxiety. Nozomi followed him into the office, hands deep in the pockets of her lab coat. Her dark hair was pulled back with a simple clip with stray tendrils framing her small face. Takumi closed the door and then followed Sakura as she crossed her office to sit down at her desk. However, she didn't move to pull out its contents.

"Ginkaku-san did all the work herself. I told her that it was high priority," he told her. Sakura nodded absently. She could have easily deduced that herself from the checks and numbers filled out on the front of the envelope. In the space for "patient name", there was the standard title 'Jane Doe'. Heaving a sigh, Sakura opened the envelope and pulled out the sheet.

"Everything's fine. If you ask me, I'd recommend she up her iron intake a little. Why is this such a big deal?" said Nozomi as she leaned against the door. Sakura shook her head a little.

"It was a favor for a friend. Thanks for the speedy work, Nozomi," Sakura answered in a soft voice. Lips pursed, Nozomi saluted her.

"No prob, boss. My lunch break is almost over so I've got to get back," she said before she slipped out of the office. But the worried glance she cast them over her shoulder told them that she wasn't fooled.

"You think she knows?" inquired Takumi.

"Probably. She's almost as sharp as you," sighed Sakura. It took the compliment a moment to sink in. Takumi blinked rapidly as he looked over at her again.

"Are you going to be okay, Sensei?" he queried with a knit brow. Lolling back in her chair, Sakura let out a very unprofessional groan.

"Sure."

"...Would you be more sure with some coffee?" he ventured. There was a long pause before Sakura spoke again.

"You're totally angling for a raise, aren't you? Because I'm totally considering giving you one."

Exchanging smiles, they reluctantly went back to their regular work at the hospital.

With the blood work ultimately inconclusive, there wasn't much else to consider to investigate the weird state of her body. Sakura had noticed herself losing weight for some time now. The change wasn't so drastic as to alarm her. She chalked it up to exhaustion and occasionally forgetting to eat at the proper times. And a sudden change in her blood composition would have made her really start to worry about the possibility of an autoimmune disorder. But with her blood completely fine, she only puzzled more and more over the strange shift in her own body.

And then, suddenly, in the beginning of September, Sakura realized that she had started gaining weight again. In tiny increments that were almost unnoticeable. But the numbers increased slightly before plateauing again. This wouldn't have bothered her at all normally but paired with the strange bouts of vertigo and fatigue, she found herself a little worried.

"You look good," Ino assured her when Sakura tagged along dress shopping one afternoon. At this, Sakura had to arch an eyebrow.

"No. Seriously. Have you changed your diet? Because your skin looks great. And you got some color back in those cheeks," insisted Ino. As Sakura helped Ino zip up the back, she couldn't help but smile.

"Don't say that. I don't want to show you up at your own wedding, Piggy," teased Sakura. Ino let out a loud snort as she fussed with the veil.

"Please. The only way that would happen is if you block me from view with that enormous brow of yours," retorted Ino.

"Remind me why I'm friends with you again," sighed Sakura. Blowing her a kiss, Ino winked devilishly.

"You'll never get rid of me now. I'm just too cute."

And then Ino spun around, admiring herself in the mirror. The frothy layers of white fabric billowed dreamily when she moved. Sakura sighed at the strings of beads draped along the skirt that glittered in the light. Ino had insisted upon a Western-style wedding dress instead of a more traditional kimono. And Sakura had to admit that it looked good.

For a moment, there was a faint ache in her chest. Ino was beautiful, positively glowing. She was all wrapped up in her love and moving on with things. The shadows of war barely touched upon her because she refused to let them. Sakura had always admired that strength but had never quite figured out how to master it.

Turning back around, Ino opened her mouth to say something. She stopped short at the look on Sakura's face. She had the strangest feeling that Sakura was about to cry.

"Okay! I think this is the one! Let me change and then you've got to help me pick jewelry. You know how bad I am at that," Ino babbled as she pushed past the curtains leading to the dressing room. Sucking in a deep breath, Sakura was grateful that Ino hadn't called her out.

* * *

><p>"A mission," said Sasuke as he arched an eyebrow.<p>

"Well, it's less of a mission and more a vacation for Sakura-chan. It takes her to Hot Springs Country so I figured it'd be time for her to relax," Naruto answered. Sasuke still looked suspicious but he nodded for the Hokage to continue.

"I'm sending her with Sai for a week. It's an easy information extraction. They should be done with it in one night and then they can spend the rest of it relaxing," explained Naruto. As Naruto spoke, Sasuke's frown deepened and deepened.

"So?" prompted Sasuke, finding that while he appreciated being kept in the loop, it seemed irrelevant for him to know about this particular mission in such detail.

"So I thought you'd want to know. You've been all hovering and creepy about Sakura lately," said Naruto, barely managing to hide his smile. At this, Sasuke outright glowered. All the years hadn't changed the fact that Naruto still couldn't resist poking fun at Sasuke. And knowing that attacking the Hokage wouldn't exactly be taken kindly by the villagers, Sasuke was forced to endure the not-so subtle jabs every now and then.

"Okay, okay. Your confinement in the village is going to be up in a few days. I was thinking you could tag along to celebrate," admitted Naruto. Sasuke's eyes remained narrowed but his shoulders relaxed a little. It was in three days to be precise. From then on, the chakra suppressers sealed into his wrists would be removed and he would be allowed to slip in and out of the village (under strict supervision, of course).

"There's no way, on paper, I'd be allowed to leave the village for no reason," he pointed out in a muted voice. But Naruto waved off his worries.

"There are roles to this one. Sakura's the new bride to the rich young lord from some small but prosperous region. Shikamaru's taken care of details with aliases and backstories," Naruto said.

"And what role will I be playing? Back-up?" inquired Sasuke, completely serious.

"Well, no lord goes around without his trusted bodyguard," Naruto relented. But Sasuke still didn't trust the grin pulling at his best friend's mouth so he stared blankly at him until Naruto let out a sigh.

"I don't think it would be good for the blushing bride to be punching the crap out of her husband. You'll be playing the role of the lord, Sasuke. And Sai will be the cheerful but sociopathic bodyguard," Naruto admitted.

"No," said Sasuke in a flat voice.

"What do you mean 'no'? I'm the Hokage," Naruto scoffed.

"Get another team to do it," Sasuke snapped back.

"Uh, let's see. No way am I sending Hinata-chan, Ino would end up whipping whoever I set up as the lord, Tenten would break someone's arm, and none of the other kunoichi who are free are young or old enough to play the part," sighed Naruto as he listed off the names. It was Sasuke's turn to look exasperated.

"And you think Sakura will play the part of demure trophy wife?" Sasuke challenged. The sad look that appeared on Naruto's visage was so sudden. Chuckling weakly, Naruto looked down at his hands for a moment.

"You'd be surprised. She's better at putting up a front than you are," he answered softly. And then, clearing his throat, the Hokage let the smile return to his face.

"So I think I'll send you with Sakura-chan. It'll be nice," Naruto proudly declared as he slapped his palms down on his desk.

* * *

><p>"I refuse," Sakura flatly said.<p>

She watched Iruka's jaw drop. Naruto looked as if she had just punched him in the gut. She could feel Sasuke's gaze on her too.

"B...But I'm the Hokage," was all Naruto could eventually sputter. Eyebrows arching, Sakura crossed her arms over her chest, pulling her clipboard in too. She had received an urgent summons from the Hokage in the middle of her lunch break. Abandoning her coffee and the string of patients scheduled for that afternoon, Sakura had rushed over still holding her files. It was safe to say that she hadn't smiled when she was met with Naruto's usual grin.

"This is an important mission, Sakura," Iruka told her in a faint voice.

"Yes and I'm sure our esteemed Hokage will have no trouble finding a replacement. Now if you'll excuse me, my lunch break ends in 15 minutes and I'd like to go finish my coffee," she evenly said. She stood to leave but hesitated as a thought occurred to her.

"Oh, but if you want me present for when you undo the seal on Sasuke-kun, I'll be around. Make an appointment with my apprentice, __Hokage-sama__," she added with a smug look. Sakura glanced Sasuke's way as she left and returned his appraising look with a cheeky grin. He offered a faint smirk of his own as she left while Naruto sat there still stunned.

When her shift ended, Sakura popped into her office partly to swap out her white coat for her jacket and partly because she felt Sasuke's chakra signature there. Nudging the door open with her foot, she tried not to smile at him leafing through one of her books with a furrowed brow.

"Let's get dinner," he said without looking up at her. Hiding her surprise was difficult. It wasn't unusual for her to be the one pestering him into getting dinner together. Their schedules just generally matched up and with Sai always popping in and out for various missions with ANBU, Sakura didn't have anyone else to eat with. But Sasuke taking the initiative? Now that was odd.

"Is there a special occasion? Or are you just trying to bribe me?" queried Sakura while tossing her white coat over the back of her chair. She skirted past him with her arms bare, searching for the waffle knit cardigan she had worn that morning. The sensation of Sasuke's gaze following her wherever she went usually didn't bother her. She had come to accept it as much as Naruto's mannerism of sticking "-ttebayo" at the end of his words or Shikamaru's tendency to call everyone and everything "troublesome" under his breath. But this time, it felt different. Sasuke's stare was less observing than normal and more scrutinizing.

"Neither. I want sushi. Hurry up. I'm hungry," Sasuke answered. As he spoke, he closed the book he was holding and hefted it in his hand with a thoughtful expression.

"__Manifestations of Severe Autoimmune Disorders in the Endocrine System__," he read out loud even though she could clearly see the title herself. Sakura waited for him to speak again as she found her cardigan on the floor behind her desk where it had fallen off the arm of her chair. As she pulled her arms through the thick sleeves and buttoned up the front, Sasuke cleared his throat before he spoke.

"I... don't even understand the first page of this book," he admitted while shoving the tome back in place on the shelf. There was a moment when he ran his fingers over the spines of some of the other thick books before he turned to look at her. At this, Sakura had to laugh.

"Of course you wouldn't. That's really advanced stuff. It took me years to get to that point. I'd be sort of insulted if you just waltzed in and picked up a book and got it right away," she assured him. Sasuke watched as she pulled her jacket on over her cardigan and left it unbuttoned. With a broad smile, Sakura patted her stomach.

"Okay. Let's go eat," she declared.

Falling into step beside her, Sasuke followed her down the hall and to the elevator, down to the first floor. Sakura paused to poke her head into the emergency room to check up on Takumi, who had just clocked in for the night shift. She glanced over a couple files and signed a couple forms before giving her apprentice a reassuring pat on the shoulder. And when they had made it to the lobby where the nurse's station was, Sakura was again held up by questions and concerns. Medications had to approved and various administrative tasks had to be attended to. All the while, the nurses's cast Sasuke sly looks and giggled together.

"Out on a date, Sensei?" one of the younger nurses teased.

Normally, this comment would have been met with a laugh and some humorous rebuttal. But the sharp look from Sakura startled the younger woman.

"I'll see you in the morning, ladies," was all Sakura said before she pulled Sasuke along by the elbow.

She stole a glance at her companion as they walked to dinner and she knew that her reaction hadn't escaped his notice. But he chose not to bring it up and she was grateful for his discretion. Instead, she asked him about his day and when he returned the gesture by asking about hers, she told him about the boy who had come in with a coin shoved up his nose. The disturbed expression that briefly crossed his face elicited a giggle from her.

"...How," he managed to say, holding up his thumb and pointer finger to gauge the size of a nostril.

"I honestly don't know. I love kids but they're absolutely crazy," she sighed.

Sasuke held the door for her when they reached the restaurant. Sakura wondered for a second if this was the way things had always been but was distracted by the waiter leading them to a little corner of the sushi bar. The chef welcomed them in a boisterous call as he placed a slab of glistening salmon on his cutting board.

"Let's order a bunch of things and just split them all," she declared without even reading the whole menu. The look Sasuke shot her over the rim of his tea was slightly exasperated.

"You just don't feel like having to order anything yourself," he accused her quite accurately. She shrugged unapologetically. In the end, Sasuke's stern look guilted her into looking at the menu again. They ordered an array of different fish including plenty of nigiri for Sasuke. Shooting looks at the chef to make sure that he didn't see, Sakura quickly separated the fish from the rice, plopping the extra rice onto Sasuke's plate and the fish on hers.

"White rice has a lot of carbs," she explained when Sasuke stared at her like she was crazy. He rolled his eyes but ate the rice without complaint. When Sasuke stole her last piece of ginger, she scowled at him until he apologized by giving her the last piece of fatty tuna. They poured sake for each other, though after his second drink, Sasuke switched to green tea.

"I still can't believe everyone's getting married so soon. I'll be the only old maid left," grumbled Sakura as she motioned for a cup of green tea too.

"You're 25. How does that make you an old maid?" demanded Sasuke in return.

"It's all relative. If you're the only single one left, you're the old maid," she insisted.

"Well, it's to be expected now. Lots of people get engaged during or right before any war," reasoned Sasuke. Sakura's smile dimmed slightly.

"...Yeah," was all she could think of to say.

They waited for Sakura to finish her tea before they paid the bill and left the restaurant with full stomachs. Since they were closer to Sakura's house, they headed in that direction with Sakura not even bothering to insist that she was fine on her own. She hummed softly as they walked. Her hands were clasped behind her, fingers lacing neatly over one another. Sasuke stopped for a second, watching her easy gait until she noticed that he wasn't moving. She turned to look at him with curious eyes.

"So why did you really turn it down? The mission," asked Sasuke as he made a few long strides to catch up with her. She wasn't even surprised by the question.

"I'm not feeling so good- physically. It's probably not the best idea to have me out in the field right now," she admitted with a little reluctance.

"Are you alright?" Sasuke questioned with sharp eyes that scanned over her face a few times.

"Yeah. It's just a medic's intuition."

Though Sasuke looked far from satisfied by her lame excuse, he didn't push it. Instead, he moved closer, putting his arm around her shoulders. Naruto had often done the same thing in the past. Belting out a loud tune, he would pull them through the streets, zig-zagging as his tipsy feet faltered every once in a while. After a night of drinking, pulled close together by that strong arm, she had reveled in the comfort of their friendship. And now the same thing was there with Sasuke- that warm fuzziness she had always felt missing between them.

"You're heavy!" she complained. She knew she couldn't hide her smile. Sasuke saw through her like he always did.

"You are literally the strongest woman I know. Deal with it," he snorted in response.

Three days later, Sakura cast a worried look in Kakashi's direction as she entered the Hokage's office. Her former teacher picked up on her anxiety quickly. He was one of the best when it came to seals and the like. And the fact that it was Kakashi undoing the seal he had created made the procedure much less risky. It was all over in a few minutes. The ring of black symbols that had been seared into Sasuke's wrists for months were now lifted. They slid off his skin, falling to the floor before disappearing in little wisps of black smoke. As he stood rubbing at his tender skin, Sakura reached out with chakra to check his condition.

"It's standard protocol for you to give him a physical after this anyway. You might as well take him to the hospital," Naruto pointed out. Sakura looked at Sasuke and he nodded his assent.

"Come in a couple hours. Takumi's got his first appendectomy today and I promised I'd be there," Sakura told him as she glanced up at the clock.

Of course Takumi performed flawlessly. The cuts of his scalpel were clean and methodical. He stemmed bleeding just the way she had taught him- a tiny sizzle of chakra to cauterize the vessels. It was over in under an hour and she watched him deliver the good news to the frantic parents. They kissed his hands and hugged one another, relieved to find that their daughter would be fine. Takumi returned to her side with cheeks flushed with pleasure. Still humble as ever, he waited for her appraisal.

"I'd say that was a fine job, Takumi. Keep that up and you'll be stealing my job in a few years," she said. He couldn't wipe the grin off his face as he went to do the rest of his work for the day.

By the time Sasuke showed up, Sakura was sitting on the counter of the reception area on the first floor with a styrofoam cup of coffee in one hand. She blew the fragrant steam away from her face as she listened to the head nurse.

"She's in her second trimester- already huge. I could swear she's carrying twins," the older woman proudly boasted of her daughter. Smiling as kindly as she could, Sakura nodded encouragingly every once in a while. As she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, she felt the flicker of a familiar chakra.

"I'd wonder if you'd feel comfortable delivering the child, Haruno-sensei," added the nurse. Sakura flushed bright red. Flapping her hand, she let out a startled laugh.

"You'd be better off asking Tanihara-sensei. I'm not an obstetrician. I've only overseen a few live births when I was studying under Tsunade-shishou," answered Sakura. The nurse laughed too. She had been asking only out of respect, of course.

"You've got a visitor, Sensei," the nurse pointed out, still smiling. She suddenly busied herself organizing patient files while Sakura tilted her head back to look at Sasuke approaching.

"You're late," she accused, pointing her finger at him. Sasuke's left eyebrow rose.

"You said come around 3:30-4," he replied.

It was 3:57 on the dot. Sakura hopped off the counter. With her heels on, she still had to look up a little to match his gaze.

"Please. What were you so busy doing that you had to come now?" she scoffed. But then her eyes zeroed in on the cut on the corner of his mouth. Then her hands shot out and grabbed his right wrist. The bruises on his knuckles gave her a good idea of what had gone down.

"You and the stupid Hokage had a spar, huh?" chuckled Sakura. Sasuke shrugged unapologetically.

"Naruto went to Ino to get patched up. He said you would beat him up good before fixing anything if you found out he skipped out on work for this," Sasuke admitted.

"Giving your best friend up like that, huh? Where are your loyalties, Sasuke-kun?" she teased as she put her hand on his arm. They walked together, down the hall and up the stairs to the second floor while Sakura sipped at her coffee.

"I side with the person most likely to kill me. It's survival of the fittest," responded Sasuke. Laughing loudly, she pushed him into the examination room. She paused at the nurse's station to grab his file. While she was there, she directed some of the junior nurses and gave stern looks to the ones sitting around gossiping, spurring them into motion. When she entered the examination room, she shut and locked the door. The medical file plopped down on the desk with a heavy slap. Sasuke was already sitting on the table, his hands resting idly in his lap as he watched her.

"Aside from the hand and the lip, anything else hurt?" inquired Sakura while she busied herself pulling on sterile gloves.

"My ribs. He kicked them pretty hard. They're not broken."

"Men," sighed Sakura with a roll of her eyes as she turned back to him.

"Straight back. Okay. I'm going to count to three. I want you to inhale while I'm doing that," said Sakura. She slipped her stethoscope under his shirt. She felt his jolt when the cold metal made contact with his skin.

"One..two...three...Good. Now, exhale the same way. One...two...three."

The steady beat of his heart was a soft background noise as she focused on his breathing. There didn't seem to be anything wrong with his lungs. They sounded as heathy as ever. She tested reflexes and then checked blood pressure.

"Everything seems fine. Let me do a quick scan. Sometimes chakra flow gets a little wonky after seals come off," she said. But when she closed her eyes and slipped her chakra into Sasuke's shoulder, she found the pathways pristine. There was a little noticeable trace of blockage in his wrists but those would fade over time. She lightly massaged the area with chakra to ease tension and to encourage blood flow.

She passed her fingers over Sasuke's knuckles to fade the bruising there. A quick swipe of her thumb on the corner of his mouth erased the cut there too. Slipping her hand under his shirt, she gently felt his ribs. There was a little swelling around the bottom rib- the very same one she had re-broken and healed before. Clucking her tongue, she probed around the area with chakra.

"Not cracked. A little more pressure and it would have, though. It's just some localized swelling," she told him as she directed chakra there to soothe. She was acutely aware of Sasuke's eyes focused on her face as she ran her palm along the rest of his ribs and then his back. She applied firm pressure, patiently looking for any knots or bumps that shouldn't be there.

They stopped talking as she moved on to check his eyes. Her procedure had taken nicely. The proper nerves and muscles had attached themselves to the new eyes as well as all the little capillaries. He reported no more eye pain and when she had him activate the sharingan, she could feel no disturbances in the flow of energy there.

Sakura signed off on Uchiha Sasuke's file that he was fit to return to duty and he prepared to leave on his first mission in a long time.

Since Sakura had refused her spot on the team for now and there was nobody free to fill in the spot, Shikamaru rewrote the cover stories for their mission. A rich, young lord and his faithful bodyguard. There was a wife but she was currently ill and therefore in no condition to travel.

Sakura didn't go to see Sai and Sasuke off but she did stop by Sasuke's apartment the night before to drop off some herbal supplements. She sat on the windowsill, legs swinging as she watched him meticulously fold his shirts.

"They'll help encourage your chakra pathways to readjust properly," she explained as she dropped the little glass bottle in his bag when he set it down near her feet. Sasuke nodded his thanks. When he straightened, he stood watching her for a few moments.

"What?" she asked, feeling the intensity of his gaze on her.

"Nothing," he answered. Lips twisting into a pout, Sakura glared at him before beckoning him forward with her fingers. He looked suspicious but still took a few steps toward her. When he was close enough, she slapped her hands against his cheeks hard enough to sting. But as he opened his mouth to complain, Sakura fixed him with a brilliant smile.

"You're going to be fine. My Sasuke-kun," she said. Leaning forward, she pressed her forehead against his. Her eyes slid shut as she felt the angry tension leave him.

"If you come home even a little hurt, I'll kill you," she muttered. She heard his smirk and the little huff of derisive laughter. Eyes fluttering open, she stared into his clear sepia irises. Sasuke's fingers wrapped around her upper arms, squeezing just a little.

* * *

><p>Sai and Sasuke were gone for a full week. Whenever Naruto teased her, she swore up and down the Hokage monument that she wasn't worried. The both of them were grown men and highly experience shinobi. What was there to fear? And to be honest, it wasn't Sasuke or Sai that was making her so pale with anxiety and stress.<p>

It was the fact that she couldn't sleep properly anymore. Because when she did get the right amount of sleep, her dreams were so vivid and abrasive that she woke up feeling the exact opposite of well-rested. On good nights, Sakura dreamt of fields filled with vivid red flowers or of forests filled with nesting birds that chattered and tweeted so insistently that it often woke her in the middle of the night thinking there were real birds twittering outside her window. Other times, she woke up in a cold sweat with visions of blood running down her fingers.

So Sakura slept less and less and her coffee intake simply increased to compensate. She busied herself helping Ino and Hinata plan their weddings. She volunteered to teach extra classes to the training medics. Sakura spent a couple days in the ER with Takumi watching over his procedures and offering support whenever he asked for it. The boy was quickly becoming comfortable healing on his own and Sakura could see his skill improving every day.

When Sai and Sasuke did finally come home six days later, Sakura barely had the chance to greet them. There had been an important break in the research division and her consultation had been requested immediately. Nozomi was practically bouncing as she raced around chattering about all the new things that had happened when Sakura joined her in the underground lab.

One of the nurses was thoughtful enough to mention that while Sai had come in with a couple of minor abrasions, Sasuke had suffered an injury to his leg that required stitches. With the hospital's new policy of using minimal chakra with non-fatal injuries, someone had simply sewn up the wound and kept him overnight for observation before sending him home. Sakura promised herself that she would checked up on him soon but she soon lost herself in research and the idea was quickly drowned out by other things. She saw Sai briefly whenever she came home and took a few hours to sleep before she was back at the hospital again.

Before she knew it, it had been two weeks since Sasuke had come home and she had yet to see his face. Because the research on keying a substance to a specific chakra signature was so secure, they had decided to experiment solely using Sakura's chakra. No experiments could be run without her present and so she spent more time than was probably healthy in the lab. Sakura started napping in the morgue again and ordering take-out for most of her meals. She stood at her desk to eat while signing off on necessary paperwork to keep the hospital running smoothly.

By the time the first set of trials was over, Sakura was so exhausted that Takumi practically forced her to go home for the first time in several days. Though she had protested, she was actually looking forward to a bath and sleeping on something other than a cold metal gurney.

She came back to a darkened house. Hooking a finger into the back of her pump, she pulled one off and then the other. She opened the door, carelessly throwing the heels into the heap in the foyer. Sai's extra pair of sandals sat next to the chaos. He had left a message with the reception desk the day before to let her know that he was going on another mission.

The dim hallway was lit up by the one light on in the kitchen. A floorboard creaked slightly.

"Hello?" she called, suddenly vigilant. In slow movements, she yanked the innocuous clip holding her hair up. She flicked her wrist and the flat teeth folded together to form one long blade. On the balls of her feet, she carefully crept into the living room. She let out a huge sigh when she saw Sasuke stretched out on the sofa. His shoes were still on. Half-annoyed, she flicked the switch to flood the room with light. What was Sasuke doing concealing his chakra in her house anyway? She took note of her first aid kit sitting on the coffee table.

"What're you doing?" she inquired as she pocketed her blade. She had seen his brow wrinkle minutely so he was definitely awake. Her arms crossed as she waited for him to speak.

"I ran out of medicine. My leg hurts again," he muttered. Her smile dissolved. Arms relaxing, she hurried over to his side. Seeing the slight pink tinge to his face, she pressed her palm to his cheek. To her surprise, he reached up and put his hand over hers.

"You're cold," he said.

"Yeah. I was outside," answered Sakura while quickly pulling her hand away.

"What time is it?" he inquired, rubbing at his eyes.

"Almost midnight. Did you eat?"

"I was waiting for you."

That made her stop. She had been sliding her white coat off. She had forgotten to change out of it at the hospital. It hung awkwardly around her elbows, trapped in that strange position. A little flutter in her stomach was quickly quashed.

"You're a doctor's worst nightmare. Not eating. Self-medicating. How much did you take?"

"What?" he demanded.

"What did you even take? I hope it wasn't the Vicodin. That stuff's strong," she sighed mostly to herself now as she picked up the clear plastic container sitting on the coffee table. None of the pill bottles seemed to be out of place.

"I didn't take anything. I was waiting... you get mad when I don't ask for your help first," he answered in a mumble.

Concern started to tighten her throat as she looked down at Sasuke again. Pressing the back of her hand to his forehead, she realized that fever could be an indicator of a real problem. Her hand began to grow restless. She moved it, pressing it to his cheek and then to his throat and collar. The labored rise and fall of his chest was a warning sign too. Leaning in closer to him, she began lightly tracing her fingers down the sides of his neck. She massaged, lightly pressing to make sure that his glands weren't swollen.

"When you said your leg hurt again... is it just the same pain or does it hurt in a different way?" she carefully queried. Sasuke frowned as he thought.

"...It's like a deep, throbbing. Stabbing?" he said almost wonderingly. Eyes narrowing, Sakura glanced down at his leg.

"Let me see that," she finally managed to persuade him.

It was surprising how unwilling Sasuke was to let her take off his pants. But after wheedling and using her most soothing voice, she convinced him that she needed to check the gash on his inner thigh. Even though his hands were shaking from fever chills, she turned around and let him do it himself. Even sick, Sasuke was as proud as ever. Letting Sakura do something like roll up the hem of his boxers seemed almost offensive to him.

When she turned back around, Sakura sucked in a sharp breath. The swollen red skin around his bandage was already bad enough to see. She sat on the edge of the sofa and carefully pulled the damp gauze away. The smell of pus was faint but her experienced nose caught on to it quickly. When she saw the angry, inflamed crimson of his skin around the stitches, Sakura almost wanted to cry. How had he waited so long to come to her for this? Hadn't he gone in for his check-up?

"Holy shit, Sasuke. This is really infected," whispered Sakura. The skin around the stitches was was so warm that she could almost imagine how much it would hurt. She cringed with sympathy when Sasuke let out a muffled noise of pain at her touch.

"Alright. I need to get you on antibiotics. I can't heal this with chakra with my reserves right now," she said, mostly thinking out loud.

"No hospital," he insisted, weakly grasping her wrist. The flush of fever in his cheeks frightened her. A tired sigh left her as she pulled his hand off her.

"No hospital. I promise," she said in a low, soothing voice.

"Hospitals are where people go to die," added Sasuke in a half-coherent mumble. That stopped her again. Feeling a little hurt, she looked down at him one more time.

"That's not true. We save a lot of people," she defended softly. Her hand moved to rest on his forehead. She brushed his hair out of his eyes as she listened to his shaky breathing.

"You do. You go there to die every day."

The clarity of his words rang in her ears.

"Maybe you're right. But we're shinobi. Why does it matter if I die on the battlefield or in the hospital?" she joked without humor. But Sasuke didn't answer.

Sakura guessed that Sasuke's leg had only gotten so infected because he hadn't gone back to the hospital for his check-up and probably hadn't listened to the instructions on how to keep the wound clean. She didn't rule out the possibility that maybe the infection had come from the hospital itself. She left a note for herself to check up on how well everyone was adhering to the protocol for sanitation.

She dosed Sasuke with medication to bring down his fever and help with the pain before she got to work. Cutting and removing the stitches was difficult when she knew how much pain Sasuke was in. And then she had to reopen the wound to relieve the pressure. Setting another towel down under him, she was careful to make her scalpel move as swiftly as possible. She didn't have enough chakra to anesthetize him, however, and she was sorry for that when she saw him grit his teeth. Cleaning out the inside of the cut as gently as she could, she mustered up enough chakra to alleviate some of the pain at least temporarily. And then she closed the whole thing up again with her own stitches.

"I'll make you a poultice. This swelling is worrying me. I think I have some herbs left," she said while getting to her feet. As she left, she brushed the back of her hand along his cheek and felt that it was still warm.

Sakura stood at the sink grinding plants together with a mortar and a pestle. The sound of wood scraping against stone reminded her of the days of her youth watching over Tsunade throw together remedies. After a little thought, she also filled a plastic basin with cool water and grabbed a clean rag. By the time she returned, Sasuke was mumbling something half-coherently. For a moment, she thought she heard her name a couple times but quickly dismissed the thought. She sat down next to the sofa, stirring the mixture of healing herbs with a spoon to check for consistency.

"Where?" she heard Sasuke breathe in a faint voice.

"Did you say something?" she asked mostly out of habit.

"Where'd you go?" he slurred out.

Sakura froze. Spoon clutched in hand, she slowly looked up at him. His cheeks were still flushed and eyes squeezed shut. But his right hand, instead of resting at his side where she had it left it was dangling limply off the edge of the couch. The grasping motion of his fingers was weak but easily recognizable.

"I went to get you something for the pain," responded Sakura. She was certain that he was talking out in a dream. There was no way that he was looking for her-

"Sakura, don't go," he said so clearly that there was no way she could construe it another way.

"I don't like it when you go." A smile pulled at her mouth at those words.

"What're you talking about, you lump? I can't go anywhere with you sick like this. This is going to sting a little so bear with me," she said, slipping back into her medic mode. As she applied a thick layer of the poultice, she heard him hiss through his teeth. But as the initial shock of contact wore off, she could see that the cool layer did soothe some of the pain. She bound it with a clean bandage and then moved on to soak the rag in water. Just as her own mother had done for her, Sakura twisted the excess moisture out of the cloth. Neatly folding it into fourths, she placed it on top of Sasuke's forehead.

Breathing out a calm sigh, Sakura sat back on her heels.

It was nearly two in the morning and she still hadn't eaten anything. Her calves ached and there was a tense pain in her shoulder (probably from stress).

Still, the lines of pain had smoothed out on Sasuke's face and that was enough to bring her some relief too. Patting his foot, she got to her feet and went to take a shower. She walked around in shorts and a t-shirt she was almost sure had once been Naruto's. It was so faded from washing that it was just white with faint suggestions of letters on the front. But it was soft and comfortable so she had really just stopped caring. She stir-fried droopy vegetables with garlic and soy sauce and ate standing at the sink and then quickly rinsed her dishes. After brushing her teeth, Sakura went to check on Sasuke again.

The way Sasuke half-dangled off her couch could hardly be described as comfortable. But she didn't have the energy to move him and she knew he was certainly in no state to walk himself. She pulled a blanket out of the linen closet and draped it over him before changing the cloth on his head.

"Jackass. You could've just gone to the hospital," Sakura huffed as she stared at his peaceful face. Plopping down on the floor next to him, she absently stroked the edge of his blanket, falling asleep before she had even realized it.

She woke the next morning with a crick in her neck from sleeping so weirdly. After a moment of thought, she sent one of her small slug summons to Takumi to let him know that she was taking the day off. She felt a little guilty not being there for Nozomi and the rest of the research department but she remembered Tsunade always scolding her for not taking better care of herself.

Sasuke woke when she set down a tray on the coffee table. The rattle of the metal spoon against the plastic was quiet but his eyes suddenly snapped open like she had set off a firecracker. His gaze swiveled around the room until it focused in on her hovering over him. Her hair was pulled back in a high ponytail. The scent of mint lingered on her breath as she exhaled. Without thinking, he raised his hand to lightly touch her lower lip with his thumb. Her eyes momentarily widened with surprise before she gently pushed his hand back down.

"Hm. Your color looks a lot better. You feel like eating? I made okayu," she said in a soft voice. The scent of sesame oil was in the air, mingling with the aroma of barley tea. Sasuke nodded and she moved to help him sit up. He ate with gusto, scraping up even the little pieces of scallion she had added to the rice porridge. After he had sipped down most of the tea, she checked his temperature again.

"How's the leg?" asked Sakura.

"Better," he answered so shortly that she rolled her eyes at him. So she lifted the bandage and gently washed the poultice off with a damp cloth. The swelling had gone down and much of the angry red had receded. She slathered on the rest of the poultice that she had stored in the refrigerator before dressing it with a fresh bandage.

And Sasuke just sort of lay there as Sakura moved around doing her neglected chores. She did the piles of laundry that had built up. She took out the garbage and cleaned the floors. For lunch they had some more of the okayu and then Sakura curled up on the armchair with one of her thick medical encyclopedias to read. Sasuke mostly slept throughout the day, waking for short periods when she changed the cloth on his head or roused him to drink some water to take with his medication. A few times, he hobbled to the bathroom but otherwise just rested. But one of the times he woke, he saw that Sakura had fallen asleep lying sideways in her armchair with her pen still in her hand. The next time he woke, she was gone and he could hear pots and pans clanging in the kitchen.

By the next morning, Sakura's chakra was replenished and she quickly finished healing up his leg until it was as good as new. With a few snips, she removed the stitches in his thigh and then healed up those tiny holes too.

"The next time this happens, I'm going to hack your damn leg off and then sew it back on," she scolded when he got out of the shower. He pulled on one of Naruto's old shirts, scowling at the loud shade of orange.

"That's just more work for you," he said mostly under his breath as he rubbed at his hair with the towel she had given him. She smacked his arm hard enough to actually hurt. When he yanked the towel off his head to glare at her, she frowned back just as fiercely.

"Do you want me to thank you or something? **Thank. You**," he scoffed. But this time Sakura's frown was only a feigned pout.

"You're very welcome, you stubborn jerk," she sniffed, her smile peeking through.

* * *

><p>Naruto's birthday passed in a night of hotpot and warm sake at his apartment a couple days later. It was an intimate affair- none of the loud partying at bars that they had always preferred. Hinata and Sakura chatted as they washed and chopped vegetables. Sai, recently home from his mission, carried over the hotpot Sakura kept in the attic. She had gotten it from her mother when she moved out but there had never been enough time to gather people for a real meal. Naruto and Sai moved around setting it up on the dining room table. They had to squeeze in Naruto's desk chair and the fit was a little tight but they managed to work out some sort of arrangement.<p>

Sasuke looked around, seeming a little lost until Sakura glanced up from the cutting board.

"Sasuke-kun, would you mind washing the carrots?" she called out. Sakura felt Hinata's gaze on her and she gave the other woman a smile. There was a pause before Hinata offered back an equally warm grin.

"So Ino-san told me she wanted gold dresses for her bridesmaids," Hinata suddenly said, making sure that there would be no awkward pause when Sasuke joined them..

"Ugh, I keep telling that stupid pig that gold looks terrible on me. If she wants metallics, why not go for silver and lilac or something?" sighed Sakura. When Sasuke walked over, Sakura pointed with her knife to the refrigerator before she brought it down to chop through a head of napa cabbage. The crunch of the crisp vegetable under the blade filled with silence for a bit as Hinata continued slicing up mushrooms on the other cutting board.

"You know, you should probably run that by Ino-san. I think she'd like that," commented Hinata. Wiping her hands on the front of her apron, Sakura moved to stir the broth simmering gently on the stove. She ladled a little into a tiny dish to taste. As she pinched salt between her fingers and tossed it into the pot, Sakura looked over her shoulder at Sasuke standing at the sink. She watched the motions of his shoulders and arms as he washed the carrots.

Sakura grabbed a peeler from a drawer and walked over to Sasuke. She rose on her tiptoes and peered over his shoulder for a moment. Sasuke glanced back at her for a moment. He didn't seem at all bothered by the close contact.

"So now you can peel the carrots and then cut them into chunks," Sakura instructed as she held up the peeler to show him. As she set the tool down on the counter, she felt his eyes following her.

"How big?" he questioned. Thinking, Sakura took his left hand and then measured out a space on his thumb between two of her fingers. She waited until he nodded before she released him.

"Should we have more or is this enough?" she heard Hinata ask. Sakura twisted her head around to look at the small pile. She shrugged and Hinata picked up another bunch of mushrooms to chop.

"You look tired. Are you alright?" inquired Sasuke in a low voice just by her ear. Even Naruto with his keen hearing wouldn't have picked up on that. Jumping just a little, Sakura turned back to Sasuke.

"Yeah. I'm fine," she assured him in a tone just as soft. Patting his shoulder, she moved away to go back to her work. But before she could, she heard Sai calling her name. She walked around the corner to see Naruto and Sai staring at the array of plates and chopsticks they had been charged with putting out.

"Chopsticks to the left of the plates?" Naruto guessed.

"Nope. To the right," she promptly corrected. The way Sai was watching her was slightly unsettling so she turned on her heel to stare right back at him.

"What?" she demanded.

"Nothing." Sai shrugged innocently.

Completely unconvinced, she punched him not-so-gently in the arm and moved back to the kitchen.

Dinner was cozy and delicious. Sakura was not above kicking Naruto under the table when he hogged all the meat. They drank moderately and when Naruto offered to pour her another drink, Sakura hesitated and then politely declined.

Naruto half-soberly hugged Sakura when she presented him with an expensive set of ramen imported from Wind Country. He opened up the rest of his gifts with equal gusto and there was a lot of laughter mingled in with his cheers. The painting of Team 7 Sai had done for him was immediately hung over the sofa. Sasuke shoved Naruto aside with an impatient sigh when the blond jumped onto the sofa with hammer and nails.

"The Hokage shouldn't be stumbling around with a broken thumb," scoffed Sasuke as he hammered the nail in place. He caught Sakura's gaze and she caught the edge of his smile.

The sight of the painting when it was properly hung brought tears to Sakura's eyes and she quickly pretended that they had been brought on by a yawn.

Naruto stood in the middle, one arm each over Sai and Sasuke's shoulders. And there she was, wedged in between Naruto and Sasuke. Sakura suddenly thought back to the two separate photos of Team 7 that sat on her desk at home. Their eyes were so much younger then. The appearance of youth had nothing to do with the rounded cheeks or the significantly smaller statures. Sakura stood staring up at Naruto's cheeky smile or at the gentler curve of Sai's expression. She let out a gasp when she carefully examined the other side of the painting. Because though Naruto and Sai were both looking out at an invisible camera, she and Sasuke were looking at one another.

"I have to go. There's a meeting with the council tomorrow," Sakura suddenly said, turning away from the artwork.

"What? It's not even midnight yet. Are you sure?" The way Naruto said it broke her heart. When he took her by the shoulders, the honesty in his blue gaze filled her with sudden shame. Gut twisting furiously, she nodded.

"Sorry. I should get back," she insisted. She pulled her arms through her coat and then wound her thick white scarf around her neck in quick motions. She hoped that the movements just looked purposeful and not panicky. But when she moved to the door, Sasuke was standing in her way, his jacket already on.

"I'll walk you back. I have work in the morning too," he simply said. Swallowing thickly, Sakura turned back to everyone else. She hugged Naruto once and then Hinata. When she got to Sai, his look made her feel sick again.

"I'll see you at home, Sai," she settled for saying. Not looking at Sasuke, Sakura left the apartment.

The brisk bite to the autumn night was invigorating. Hands fisted at her sides, Sakura strode down the street. She was well aware of Sasuke easily keeping pace with her. His silence unnerved her. Then, after a minute, she suddenly turned on her heel under a streetlight. In the watery pool of orange light, Sakura stared up at Sasuke's face. He looked so calm, so patient. And she could just imagine her cheeks blotchy and her nose red from the chill.

"Stop. Just stop," she bit out. She saw Sasuke's eyebrows rise.

"Stop walking me home. Stop going out of your way to be nice to me. Stop," Sakura snapped. Horrified with herself, she didn't give him a chance to respond to her. She ran home, completely aware of the fact of how crazy she looked. As soon as she made it inside, she locked herself in her office. There, surrounded by her research and the six-pack of beer she always kept for emergencies under her desk, she drank curled up in her comfortable chair until she heard Sai come home. His footsteps padded across the floor, slowing as they approached.

"Are you alright?" inquired Sai.

"No," Sakura answered. That seemed to throw him for a bit.

"...I'm sorry about that," he finally said in response. Sakura almost smiled at that. She waited because she could feel him searching for words in that pause.

"Would you like to be not alright together?" he queried.

Sakura didn't say anything but she rolled over in her chair to twist the lock open.

Sai sat on the sofa in her office. They sat facing each other, occasionally sipping from the lukewarm cans of beer. It was only when all of the cans were emptied and crushed that Sakura got to her feet. As she passed him, Sakura stopped to lean heavily on his shoulder.

The painting Sai had so painstakingly worked on.

The look that he had depicted her and Sasuke sharing had shaken her to the core. Absolute tenderness. A connection so profound that it refused to be confined to a canvas. And the sheer softness he had etched into her face had terrified her. She had run, like the coward she was.

"Do I... really look at him like that?" she asked in a shaking voice.

"No. But he looks at you like that. And sometimes you pretend not to see it," said Sai.

Not speaking again, Sakura silently went to her room and lay there for a sleepless night until the sun rose and it was time to go to work.

* * *

><p>Sakura didn't see Sasuke again until a couple days later.<p>

For the first time in a while, Sakura managed to find time to stop by the flower shop. Ino's mother commented on her absence with the usual friendly curiosity and Sakura couldn't remember what generic response she gave. But she found herself back in the Uchiha district with the blooms hugged lightly to her chest.

Dust had settled back into her footprints but not enough to fill them in completely. She stepped carefully and knelt there in front of the shrine. Using her sleeve, she carefully wiped down the picture frames so she could see the faces clearly again. She lit the incense, set the flowers in the vase, and then just stared. She had nothing to say that day.

But still she sat there for close to half an hour, letting her mind wander as she carefully looked over those faces again and again. When she felt a chakra signature tickling at the edges of her awareness, she looked up sharply. The front door rattled open and then there was a long pause before she heard the tap of sandals on the floor. They approached slowly, almost hesitating between each footfall. Finally, the door to the living room opened and she saw Sasuke's shadow fall across the floor just beside her. She held her breath as he moved until he was standing to her right. Slowly, he lowered himself until he was crouching next to her. With his back straight and expression tight, he stared at her rather than at the photographs.

"Hi," she greeted in a small voice.

"Hey," he answered back in a tone just as hushed.

Reaching out in the dim room filled with dust, she felt for his hand and held it tightly as they sat in silence.


	13. Winter Peony

Happy (Almost) New Year, everyone. It's really late and I'm only half-coherent so I'll keep this short. This year has given me a lot to deal with so updates have been terribly inconsistent and almost nonexistent. Still, thank you to everyone for sticking with me. Thank you, sincerely, to all my readers and to the reviewers. Here's to hoping that 2014 brings... less... in general.

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 13: Winter Peony

Ino's wedding was a beautiful affair. Sakura, as maid of honor, was in a long silver dress with thin straps. And Hinata, as the other bridesmaid looked equally beautiful in the same dress, only dark purple. Ino would never admit it but she had liked Sakura's idea of silver and purple better than all gold and had changed the color scheme last minute. But Sakura didn't have the heart to pick on her. Because Ino was stunning in her flowing princess gown of a wedding dress and the look on Chouji's face as she floated down the aisle was enough to make Sakura's chest expand with equal parts of happiness and envy. Kurenai's son along with one of Ino's toddler cousins followed along as ring bearer and flower girl.

The ceremony went as expected. Ino's cheeks were flushed rosy red with excitement. The mothers cried. Ino's father and Chouji's father wept silently and put their arms over each others' shoulders in the front row. After the couple kissed, Chouji suddenly lifted Ino into his arms.

"On to the reception, everyone! Chouji's cousins did all the cooking!" Ino shouted as she was carried off into the reception area. Sakura and Hinata stared after their friend. This wasn't at all what had been rehearsed and the best man, Shikamaru, looked just as startled. But then, shoving his hands into his pockets, he let out a yawn. The natural expression of nonchalance slipped across his face again.

"Well, shouldn't keep them waiting," he muttered as he marched back up the aisle after them. The rest of the guests took this as the cue to stand and begin moving too.

Naruto came up to them, laughing heartily. Instead of a suit, he was wearing his Hokage robes, claiming that they were formal enough for all occasions, earning a sigh from Hinata. Sakura didn't say anything but she had to admit that the pristine white robe flowing after him did suit him well. Her chest still swelled with pride whenever she saw him wearing that triangular hat. It felt right.

"We should go before Chouji eats all the food. I'm starving," said Naruto as he offered his arm to Hinata. Hinata looked back at Sakura for a moment but Sakura just waved her on. She wouldn't get in the way of the happy couple. With all of Naruto's work and Hinata getting ready for the wedding, they didn't get much time together. Sakura lingered there near the altar, purposely spacing enough time away from them so that Naruto wouldn't try to include her in conversation too.

"How did she bribe you to get you into those shoes?"

Sakura turned at the sound of Sasuke's voice. While everyone else had turned to leave, only Sasuke was facing her. He stood to the side of the aisle, his hands into his pockets. The two-piece black suit looked good on him.

"I don't know but I'm hoping that I'll be too drunk to notice when my feet start hurting," she answered as she walked over to him. With the ridiculously spiky stilettos on, she was much taller than usual, but still not at Sasuke's height. She scowled up at him and he seemed to know what she was thinking.

"Maybe with a stool," he commented. Mouth opening with shock, she half-seriously smacked his arm with her bouquet. The fragrance of the roses spread into the air and one of the petals fell off, landing on Sasuke's arm.

"Careful. Don't break the bouquet," said Sasuke.

"It's not like they're throwing mine. Come on. It's an open bar," replied Sakura. As they began walking, Sasuke plucked the petal off his arm and observed it for a moment before letting it fall to the ground.

"I never want to see another rose after this again," he remarked. And Sakura eyed the room bursting with white roses and she almost had to agree. The heady fragrance of the flowers was almost starting to give her a migraine.

They entered the banquet hall. The silver streamers draped along the walls made the room sparkle. Balloons in various shades of purple were floating along the ceiling. The rose centerpieces at each table made Sasuke roll his eyes and Sakura elbowed him lightly. Sakura caught Ino's eye. The bride was already seated at the table in the front of the room with her new husband beside her. The wooden arch behind them was twined with ivy to represent marital love. Ino's mother had thought every single plant through to ensure the most blessed wedding. Sakura wished she had paid better attention to the art of flower-arranging during her time at the Academy. She had forgotten a lot of the symbolism and she was sure that if she had remembered, she would have appreciated the beauty of the blooms much more. When Sakura smiled, Ino raised her hand, waggling her fingers in a childish way.

"This is our table," Sasuke said over the chatter in the room. She let him put his hand on her elbow to guide her to the table closest to the bride and groom. Hinata and Naruto were already sitting there pouring out glasses of wine for one another. Sai smiled at her approach but then the expression cooled significantly when he looked at Sasuke. Clearing her throat loudly, Sakura sat next to Sai, creating a clear barrier between him and Sasuke.

"You look nice today, Sakura," Sai commented.

"You know I'll never believe you when you try to compliment me," she replied.

"I said _today_. You're normally difficult to look at," he answered. He dodged when she slapped at him. Turning away from him, Sakura turned her attention back to Sasuke. He was scanning the room with wary eyes but his sharingan wasn't activated.

"Too many people?" she asked, leaning in toward him so he could hear her. He casted a glance at her before he looked out at the people once again.

"Would you yell at me if I found a reason to go home early?" queried Sasuke with a faint smirk.

"Nope," she immediately said, popping her lips on the 'p' sound. After a moment, she stood, putting her hand on his shoulder as she walked past.

"Be right back."

When she returned a few minutes later, she handed a glass of dark amber liquid to Sasuke. Holding up a matching one of her own, she smiled impishly as she sat down. Sasuke looked questioningly at her.

"Cognac. To our mental health," she answered. She laughed dryly at her mock-toast while Sasuke clinked his glass against hers. Sasuke took a sip to taste while Sakura tossed back half the glass in one go. The liquor seared down her throat and settled into her stomach as heat. It loosened the heavy knot that had settled at the bottom of her stomach, making her tense shoulders relax slightly.

After a while, the food was served and conversation continued on. People caught up with one another or made new friends. Once most of the food was gone, Shikamaru stood with the vague expression of someone who had been forced to, and made a surprisingly thoughtful speech. And then Sakura stood too, making a speech of her own that made Ino cry and blush and laugh all at once. They toasted to the happy couple before Sakura sat back down and then finished her cognac. When she stared down into her empty glass, Sasuke nudged his drink over toward her with his pointer finger. Their eyes met and he smiled for a brief moment.

The music started up soon and Ino was immediately out on the dance floor, practically tearing Chouji away from his food. The large man spun her around with surprising grace. Sakura stared at the glittering jewels pinned into Ino's hair when a sickening feeling lodged into her gut, refusing to budge. Sakura picked up Sasuke's glass too and drained all his cognac. Naruto and Hinata went off to dance and to mingle.

"Another drink?" mouthed Sasuke as he picked up the empty glass. Sakura nodded without looking at him. She felt the light pressure of his hand on her shoulder as he got out of his chair, leaving just her and Sai.

"I thought single women usually look to meet a man at a wedding," said Sai suddenly. Smiling ruefully, Sakura propped her chin up in her hand to look at her friend. She glanced over her shoulder at the couples milling around the dance floor. There were some children running around underfoot, giggling and chasing one another.

"Not really interested right now. What about you? You'd have to look for someone deaf so she couldn't hear your terrible pick-up lines," she answered dryly. Even though she was talking to Sai, her eyes were fixated on the little ones playing at the edges of the dance floor. Kurenai's son picked up one of the plump toddlers and let him dance on top of his feet. He was almost 9 now and looking more and more like his father with each passing day. One of the girls said something that was lost in the music and reached up toward the boy, pleading to get a turn too. Just as she felt her chest clench painfully, there was a hand on her shoulder. Expecting Sasuke, Sakura felt her expression soften with relief.

"Can I talk to you?" Hyuuga Neji politely requested. Sakura nodded but when he didn't move to sit in the empty chair Sasuke had left behind, she looked up at him again.

"In private," added Neji. A little concerned now, Sakura left her bouquet with Sai and stood too. She followed Neji, weaving around the tables as he crossed the room. He stuck close to the walls, she noticed, so that the guests wouldn't take much notice of them. Only when they had left the room altogether did Neji's steps slow. He pulled her into an alcove, his hand surprisingly gentle.

"Is something the matter?" she immediately asked. But Neji turned to her with his usual neutral expression.

"What're you doing at a wedding looking like that?" he queried in response. Her forehead wrinkled.

"I've never seen you look so miserable before...Even when we..." Neji trailed off. They stood awkwardly, just a little too close together because of how narrow the alcove was. She rubbed at her arm and the silk of her glove made a soft swishing noise.

"I'm fine," she finally answered. It was the bitter retort she had always thrown at him.

Because in the morning after, with the sheets pulled up to her chest as she quickly found all her clothes, she had always refused to look at him. There was pink tinging her cheeks, but it was angry flush, not anything to do with embarrassment.

_I'm fine_.

But this time, Sakura looked him in the eyes as she said it. Her tone was even, her words measured and soft. And the hint of a smile quirking at her lips was assurance enough. For a moment, her hand hesitated before it moved to rest lightly on his forearm.

"I'm fine," she said again. And then another set of words fell from her lips.

"Thank you."

Neji stared at her for a long time, his pearly eyes narrowed with scrutiny. It was a while before his expression evened out a little.

"Alright," he uttered.

Sakura couldn't help but smile at how awkward this conversation was. It was more awkward than it had been before, before everything, when they had only been mutual acquaintances. But less strained, less hostile than the time they had been together. Sakura let her hand fall away.

"Alright," she echoed.

Nodding, Neji left the alcove first, walking back to the reception. Sakura watched his back curiously as he left. She was a little more than surprised by his concern but touched nonetheless. Part of her had always known he wasn't quite the villain she had made him out to be in her mind. Maybe they had brought out the ugliness in each other, brought out the worst. The thought made her a little guilty and she began to wish that she had a drink in her hand.

She stood in the alcove for a bit, watching as the occasional staff member walked past with a tray of food or champagne. Some of the server girls giggled together as they passed, not noticing the half-shadowed face watching them from that little recess in the hallway. Sakura leaned against the wall, sighing heavily. Her feet were beginning to ache in the shoes. Toes curling and uncurling, she steeled herself to return back to her friends.

By the time Sakura slipped back into the room, there were more couples spinning around on the dance floor. She skirted around everyone, dodging the gesturing arms and being careful not to step on one of the little ones running around underfoot. Before she even made it back to her seat, a hand closed around her wrist. She already knew it was Sasuke before she even turned around to look at him. He didn't say anything but she saw his gaze dart over to the table on the other side of the room where Neji sat with Tenten and Lee. When Sasuke looked pointedly back at her, Sakura lightly shook her head. Sasuke stared her in the eyes for a moment before he finally released her.

They returned to the table together where Sai was now gone as well.

As Sakura sat, she let her shoulders slouch forward a little. Sasuke's hand appeared in front of her gaze, another glass of cognac dangling right by her nose. A smile stretched her mouth as she accepted the drink.

They didn't talk, sitting alone at that table set for five. Sakura didn't really touch her food either, taking a few bites of the tender steak before scraping most of it off onto Sasuke's plate. He didn't complain and sat quietly eating. When he was done, he turned his body, sitting sideways in his chair to mirror her posture.

After a while, the music began to give her a headache and she stood. Sakura pointed in the direction of the bar to let Sasuke know where she was headed. He nodded, gaze automatically flitting back to Ino and Chouji laughing as they kissed.

"Something that burns," she requested when the bartender looked at her. She saw him grimace sympathetically as he flipped a glass onto the wooden bar counter. Ice dropped into the glass before the familiar glug of alcohol trickling down reached her ears. She didn't even bother to glance at the label to see what was being poured for her. When he slid the drink over to her, she handed him a coin for tip. As she turned back toward the front of the reception hall, she realized that Sasuke's chakra signature was much closer than it should have been. Then she felt his hand, a touch on her forearm.

"I need air," she told him. Their heads were close together so they could hear one another over the music. He nodded slightly and they headed up a small set of stairs, up to the second floor. Normally, during larger parties, there would be guests up here too, mingling around and chattering. But Ino and Chouji had agreed to keep this a smaller affair, intimate, with only close friends and family. There would be separate celebrations with each of their extended families later on.

Sakura leaned against the stone railing, staring down at the wedding party below. The fluffy white shape of Ino's dress stood out even among all the others milling around near her. Sakura tapped the bottom of her glass against the railing once before she took a sip. Maybe she was getting a little drunk because it didn't really sting so much when it went down.

A slow song came on and the lights immediately dimmed. People broke apart from their friends, automatically gravitating toward their partners. Sakura stared down at them. Arms wrapping around necks, faces coming together for tender kisses. That didn't bother her so much as the parents that paused to lift their tired little ones into their arms. Kurenai found her son. And even though he was always protesting and squirming when she tried to carry him, arguing that he was too big for that now, she easily lifted him and let him sleep in her arms.

Sakura slumped over, letting her head rest against the side of Sasuke's arm. He didn't move, didn't even acknowledge that she had done anything. But they stood in that comfortable silence, where the music was slightly more muted. It was here that she didn't have to smile whenever Ino looked her way, didn't have to act excited so that the bride wouldn't worry that anything was wrong. Sakura handed the rest of her drink to Sasuke who finished it off in slow sips.

By the time the party ended, Sakura had gotten the twisted emotions bunching up inside of her mostly under control. Her smile was bright again as she found Ino and pulled her into a tight hug. Ino's long hair had fallen out of the intricate up-do. It fell around her face in loose locks and twists and she looked more beautiful than ever with her cobalt eyes sparkling with exhilaration.

"You should throw the bouquet before everyone leaves," Sakura reminded her.

When Ino announced this, the women crowded around her, chattering and chirping happily. The bunch of flowers flew high into the air, spinning in a high arc before landing in the outstretched hands of one of Ino's cousins. The girl shrieked happily, jumping up and down as she hugged Ino.

As the maid of honor, Sakura waited around until everyone else had gone home. And Sasuke stayed with her, even after Naruto and Hinata had gone home and Sai had departed.

"Tea Country for your honeymoon, huh? You guys are going to have a great time," Sakura told them when only the parents of the bride and groom remained along with a few straggling guests. Ino beamed, her arms wrapped around Chouji's generous middle. Chouji looked just as thrilled.

"I guess I should get going. I've got a busy day tomorrow," lied Sakura through her teeth. Tomorrow was Sunday, the day of buying groceries and doing laundry. But Ino and Chouji didn't need to know that. She hugged her friend, squeezing extra tight. Sakura exchanged a few more fond words with the couple before she stepped away from them. Sasuke stepped forward, greeting them politely but succinctly. He was close with neither Ino nor Chouji but being part of the Rookie 9 had granted him a spot at the wedding anyway.

Sakura and Sasuke stopped by the front desk to pick up their coats before they left.

Outside, the chill of early winter was unmistakable. It was still November, so technically autumn, but Sakura could taste the changing season in the air. It was crisp and slightly sweet, like snow melting on her tongue.

"Are you drunk?" questioned Sasuke as they walked. Their pace was slow, almost meandering. It was close to 2 am and the village was sleeping.

"Probably a little bit. You?" she answered.

"No. Why? Planning on taking advantage of me?" he snorted.

"Don't flatter yourself," was her equally smooth response. When she giggled, she was surprised by how light-hearted it sounded. The sound seemed to interest Sasuke too. He regarded her with an expression that Sakura couldn't quite put a name to. The hint of a smile along with a scrutinizing gaze. But the moment ended when Sakura winced.

"These damn shoes. Guess I'm at my limit," she grumbled as she stopped walking. She yanked one heel off and then the other. Hooking them from her fingers, she glowered at them for a moment. The rough asphalt didn't help the pain but the cold did. Her cramped toes sighed with relief at the freedom.

"Maybe I can use these as some kind of weapon in the future," added Sakura mostly to herself. She hefted one of the shoes in her palm for a moment, eyeing the spiky point of the heel. But Sasuke didn't answer, just watched her with an expression of deep concentration. Throwing her hands (and shoes) up into the air, Sakura stared right back.

"Okay. I give up. Do I have lipstick on my teeth? Is there something on my face? What?" she demanded while pointing at him with one of the shoes.

"You're really weird. I almost forgot how weird you are," he answered.

"Well of course I'm weird. I'm friends with you, aren't I?" she retorted with a sniff. Sasuke chuckled, hands slipping into his pockets.

He walked her home, listening mostly silently as she spoke into the quiet night. She talked about the sky and the trees. She talked about her work, her tone softening with fondness when he asked about her newest batch of interns. Their arms linked together and she pressed against his side for warmth. Neither of them acknowledged these things. Or rather, it was that they didn't notice the closeness. It was a pretty night and it felt like they had the village all to themselves as everyone else slumbered away. The alcohol made Sakura's words flow together and her smiles more frequent. Before she realized it, they were in front of her house.

"Sai's sleeping," she noted when she felt the placid chakra. Sasuke made a vague noise of assent. Sakura slowly pulled away from him, her arm falling uselessly to her side.

"Well, now that I'm sobering up, I guess I should get to bed. You want to crash on the couch or are you okay to walk back?" sighed Sakura. She leaned against the front gate as she spoke. Sasuke glanced down at his clothing. He had loosened his tie hours ago. He had never really been a fan of western clothing.

"Probably not a good idea to sleep in this. Home's not far from here," he answered. At the mental image of Sasuke curled up on her sofa in a wrinkled suit, Sakura laughed. As her laughter quieted, she opened her eyes to find Sasuke watching her in that odd way again. This time, she didn't speak. She watched as his hand reached out to her. Slowly, his thumb traced the curl of her lower lip.

"You look better when you smile," Sasuke stated in a muted voice. Sakura tried to keep her tone light in response.

"I look fabulous no matter what. Good night, Sasuke," she quickly responded.

Sakura slipped into her house, leaving Sasuke standing on the other side of the gate. It hadn't been the touch on her mouth that shook her so much.

It was that face.

That goddamn face Sasuke sometimes made only in front of her. She tried not to tremble as she stood in front of the bathroom mirror wiping her face clean of make-up. Eventually, she gave up. Rubbing at the traces of mascara still smudged under her eyes, Sakura changed out of her dress and fell asleep on top of her comforter.

* * *

><p>"Now, traditionally, with most cardiac procedures, we would bisect everything down to the hypodermis directly over the sternum. However, with the advance of chakra manipulation, we're able to carry out many tasks without breaking the skin at all," said Sakura. There were twenty pairs of eyes fixed on her as she pointed to the projection on the screen. When she gestured, the girl sitting beside the projector quickly swapped out the transparency for the next one.<p>

"Can anyone tell me what one of the benefits of this technique is?" she asked. Hands rose into the air and Sakura took a few steps to point at one of the students in the back.

"It greatly reduces the possibility of healthcare acquired MRSA," he recited. Sakura nodded.

"Of course. That is one of the main concerns we're always facing. Any infection resistant to antibiotics makes them much riskier. Very good. Anyone else?" said Sakura, pointing to another hand.

"It minimizes blood loss and the need for transfusions."

"Correct. Especially in times of war, we're always running low on blood so it doesn't hurt us to require fewer transfusions," responded Sakura. The girl who had answered the question beamed with self-satisfaction.

"It saves time. There's no need for stitches and sutures so it not only reduces the actual length of the surgery but reduces patient recovery time," another student answered when Sakura called on him.

"Now that's definitely true. A very good benefit. But what might be argued about that specific point?" Sakura inquired in response. The young man looked floored. He glanced around at his fellow students for a clue but everyone else seemed to be equally confused. Finally, one solitary hand rose in the front. It was a girl with long, dark hair and pale, almost lavender eyes. A Hyuuga.

"Doctors have a limited chakra reserve. They need time to recover," she stated when Sakura nodded at her.

Sakura, who was normally quite serious during her lectures, smiled a little.

"Precisely. Doctors are not machines. This is why it's important to know not only how to carry out the procedures but how to carefully control chakra flow during the process. Being precise throughout the day could mean the difference between being able to carry out one more surgery. That's one extra life that can be saved," Sakura agreed. She glanced up at the clock in the back of the lecture hall.

"Alright. I'll let everyone out a little early today. I want you all to do the reading on the syllabus for Thursday. And come prepared with any questions you have," she concluded. Only after Sakura had finished speaking did the students begin closing their binders and zipping up their bags. Some of them immediately made their way down to the podium to pepper her with questions. Before they could start speaking, Sakura moved to close her notebook and collect her transparencies.

"Sorry, guys. I said before that I have some important appointments today so I can't really stay to talk. If anyone wants to follow me to my office I'd be happy to answer questions along the way," she said and a few of the students left with disappointed expressions. The few that stayed chattered incessantly as they followed her through the halls of the hospital. It was all they could do not to elbow each other out of the way to get a word in.

"Sensei, do you remember what I asked you about last week?" one of the girls asked as they walked down the corridor leading to her office. Sakura stared at her for a second, trying to process the round face and light scattering of freckles. It took a moment for her to pluck the girl's name out of the air.

"Oh, Saeki-kun. I talked to Okamura-sensei in pediatrics and he said he'd be happy to let you shadow him," she replied. The girl had begged her for tips on how to get in touch with the Director of Pediatrics. Sakura had been surprised by the girl's conviction. First-year students rarely knew what they wanted to specialize in. But Sakura had chatted with the doctor over coffee in the break room and put in a few good words for her. Her bright eyes sparkling with hope had reminded herself too much of her own youth for Sakura to refuse.

"Thank you so much, Sensei!" she squealed, practically skipping to keep up. Sakura laughed and the group came to a halt. She shifted her weight to her left leg, tapping her notebook against her thigh.

"You're very welcome. Now, do any of the rest of you have any burning questions left?" Sakura inquired. But she was only answered by a few giggles and pointed stares. Sighing, Sakura turned around to face Sasuke leaning on the wall outside her office. His arms were crossed behind his back while his eyes followed her. When their gazes met, he pushed off the wall to take the few steps to her.

"You know, for a man with an actual job, you spend a lot of time not working," she commented. He smirked, not at all thrown by her sass.

"I'm leaving for a mission tonight. Naruto said to get you to check my leg first," Sasuke informed her. At this, Sakura's demeanor sobered. Glancing back, she found her students smiling and giggling behind their binders.

"Off with you. I'll see you Thursday," Sakura ordered.

"Goodbye, Sensei," they chorused as they obediently left. This wasn't without another set of sly looks and shared titters. Crossing her arms over her chest, Sakura sighed. The rumors and teasing would be there next lecture. It was expected, of course. It would easily be silenced with a stern scolding from her but Sakura didn't feel particularly like being a bad guy at the moment. As she walked into her office, she waved Sasuke in. He shut the door after himself, locking it before she asked.

"So," said Sakura, tossing her things onto her desk, "Haven't seen you in a couple days." She kicked off her shoes and leaned back on the edge of her desk.

"...Naruto wants me to join ANBU- as a personal guard to the Hokage," Sasuke suddenly admitted.

"What? But you're still a Genin...and still technically an international criminal. How would that work?" she demanded, dropping all humor now. Sasuke seemed to take this as his cue to sit down on the desk beside her. He leaned back on his hands.

"I've served in ANBU and helped kill Danzo. He could make an exception," he explained with a shrug. Sakura's eyebrows knit together as she thought. Gathering chakra into her right hand, she placed it carefully on Sasuke's upper thigh. Her chakra split into a dozen tendrils, each probing a different section of muscle.

"I suppose. It's very uncommon but not unheard of," she conceded. There was some reluctance in her tone. And then another thought occurred to her.

"And what about your job then?" Sakura demanded.

"I'd resign. Naruto would put me back on the active duty list. The council of clans has agreed that my probation status will last for another year provided I don't break the arrangement. My record would be partially expunged afterwards," he said.

After the previous council of elders had been removed from power, Naruto had moved to have a new advisory council put in place. But rather than setting up a couple puppets, Naruto had changed their function to serve as a check for the Hokage's executive powers. They worked as a political body that voted on important matters for the village. They met with the Hokage on a regular basis, proposing actions and sometimes opposing the Hokage's decisions.

"If one person has too much power, he will always make the wrong choices. Someone's got to tell him 'no' sometimes," Naruto had explained to her.

"The council really thought this was alright?" commented Sakura with genuine surprise. The heads of each major clan made up the members of this body. It wasn't a secret that the current heads of the Hyuuga and Aburame clans didn't have the highest opinion of Sasuke. Sakura suspected that Shikamaru had a big part to play in why his father was the most blatant supporter of Sasuke.

"Majority vote. That old bastard Hiashi had a lot to say, according to Naruto, but Kiba's grandfather put him in his place," Sasuke elaborated. Sakura imagined the grizzled old man with his one blind eye snarling at the proud Hyuuga patriarch. She had met the Inuzuka clan head a couple times before. Despite his scarred face and the way he growled all his words, she had taken a liking to him. Then again, Sakura had always been a dog person.

"This looks all good to go. The scar tissue is minimal- shouldn't interfere with motion. Does it hurt?" Sakura asked. It seemed to take Sasuke a moment to realize what she was talking about. Her chakra probed through the old wound, analyzing the connective tissue and scanning the blood vessels. Sasuke shook his head in response.

"You're all clear, then. When do you leave?" said Sakura. She removed her hand, pushing off the desk to stand up straight. Still barefoot, she moved around the office to her file cabinet. She concentrated her chakra into a fine point, pressing her thumb against the grey pad on the front. The machine hummed as it processed before the drawer slid open. Chakra-lock technology was expensive but she had invested in it for the sole purpose of securing certain files. Naruto and Sasuke's files, for instance, were kept here. Their normal medical records were in the hospital archives like everyone else's but the confidential data was omitted from them entirely.

Sakura plucked Sasuke's thick folder from the index and flipped it open to the right page. She placed it down on top of the desk while she hunted for a good pen.

"Sunset. It's an assassination gig so I can't tell you who," he replied. Sakura nodded knowingly. She had been tasked with a few of those herself. Her knowledge of poisons as well as quick killing methods had made her well sought-after. Her skills were still just as sharp. It was that the village needed her in the hospital more than they needed her out in the field.

"I just hope it's someone who deserves to die," was all she could say. Sasuke's gaze focused on the window as he thought for a moment.

"He does," Sasuke assured her in a quiet voice. Sakura's pen stilled for an instant before she continued writing.

"That's all that matters then. I'm going into surgery in an hour so I won't see you off," she told him when she finished. Her back straightened as she looked him in the eye. She let Sasuke grasp her wrist to pull her so she was right next to him. Without him saying, Sakura already had an idea of what he wanted. But she feigned ignorance as she felt his expectant gaze.

"Do...it," he said.

Batting her eyelashes, Sakura regarded him with an innocent expression.

"Do what?" she queried. He swallowed loudly and his eyes were suddenly very occupied with staring at his hand and not her face.

"The thing," he muttered. When she lightly elbowed his side, Sasuke broke into a full scowl. But still his hand didn't release her.

"What thing?" she jabbed mercilessly. She could practically feel Sasuke's frustration as his teeth clenched. When he lifted his head to see the laughter sparkling in her eyes, he let out a harried sigh. The exhalation was sharp.

"Do that thing you do. It makes me feel better," he finally ground out. Sakura hadn't quite expected the frank wording and suddenly felt a little guilty about teasing him so much. Putting both her hands on top of his, she wiggled her fingers until he was staring her in the eyes again. She leaned forward to press her forehead against his. She was well aware that she probably had really bad coffee breath and that she stank of medicine and antiseptic. But she could already feel the tension leaving Sasuke as he inhaled deeply.

"Don't you dare leave me alone, Uchiha Sasuke. Don't you dare run away. You'll get through this," she recited in a soft voice. As she finished speaking, she let her eyes slide shut. It was rare for her to have a peaceful moment like this. Her job kept her busy and just a short moment of quiet like this was a treat.

As light as a whisper, she felt Sasuke's lips touch her own. When she didn't push him away, the pressure increased, his mouth molding against hers- firm but still patient. He pulled away and then, almost as an afterthought, he pressed a second kiss, almost a peck, to her parted lips.

"Why did you say my full name?" he asked in a whisper. Sakura opened her eyes to regard him carefully.

"Why did you kiss me?" she questioned in the same tone.

They stared at one another for a long time, stuck in a stalemate. Sakura lifted her hands off of his, self-consciously clenching and unclenching them at her sides. She gnawed on her lower lip, an old habit that only resurfaced during stressful times. The light touch of the backs of Sasuke's fingers on her cheek made her flinch a little. He held his hand there, not moving, until she finally met his gaze again.

"We'll talk when I get back," said Sasuke. She nodded, feeling warmth rising to her cheeks at his scrutiny. With one last lingering gaze, Sasuke slipped out of the office through the window.

It turned out that Sasuke's mission went on for longer than expected. Naruto told her this a week later with a grim expression, still holding the letter he had just gotten from a hawk. Sakura stood in front of his desk with an oddly blank expression before quietly excusing herself.

But she was Haruno Sakura. Chief of Medicine. Former ANBU Captain. Slayer of Sasori of the Red Sands.

And all those things meant absolutely nothing as she lay awake at night staring at her ceiling. Feeling half-crazed, she wandered around her home, picking up things and putting them down again. She wrapped a robe around herself and crossed her arms over her chest to listen to the swish of the plush fabric around her thin ankles. The wind howled restlessly outside until she started awake in bed. The irony in dreaming about being unable to sleep didn't escape Sakura. She shook her head at the absurdity of her own unconscious mind. After a few nights of this, Sakura, unable to tell if she was actually sleeping or not, fell back on her old habit of a bottle of wine before bed.

Sai had managed to find a contractor. His house was fixed in a week and he moved out at the end of November.

"It's not that I dislike living with you, Sakura. I just miss my own house," Sai told her for the millionth time as Sakura stood watching him pack. He sealed each box with clear packing tape before he stacked them. It only took a few and he carried them all downstairs in one trip when he was finished.

"I know," she whispered to the empty attic after all of his sketchpads and pencils were gone.

Once again, her home became a place of hollow creaks and soundless whispers. It screamed of emptiness and there was nothing Sakura could do to fix it. So she just avoided the problem. She took double shifts at the hospital, sleeping in her office or in the morgue whenever she had time. And even if she was home, Sakura had music on at all times. She left the television on in the living room when she cooked dinner just so the entire first floor wouldn't echo with the hollow taptaptap of her knife on the cutting board.

* * *

><p>A few days before Christmas, Sakura lay on her side. The sharp pain in her gut had hit her with such force that it drove the breath from her lungs. Sucking in shallow breaths, Sakura clenched her eyes shut. Her cheek pressed to her shoulder as she contorted, struggling to deal with the sensation tearing through her. She suddenly felt a strange warmth between her legs. The stickiness was familiar, almost like a memory of a memory.<p>

"My... period?" she breathed out loud.

She tried to think back to her years as a teenager, centuries ago, it seemed. The clenching in her abdomen seemed about right.

"But that's impossible," she said. And as she spoke, she started to smell the tang of blood in the air. Letting out a sigh, Sakura pulled herself into a sitting position. Her body seemed determine to contradict everything she knew today.

"I should do something about this," she ground out as another stab of pain hit her. This time, it seemed to radiate up, spreading to her lower back and down to her legs.

"Now," added Sakura.

Forcing herself to her feet, Sakura glanced back at her bed. Among the twisted sheets was a big spot of blood that bloomed almost like the petals of a flower. She rooted through her dresser for an old sanitary napkin but there were none. Why would there be? She hadn't had a period in almost 10 years. Clucking her tongue, she stuffed toilet paper into her underwear to soak up the worst of the bleeding. She changed her clothes, sticking with dark colors to mask the blood. Throwing her jacket on, Sakura pulled up the hood and hurried across rooftops as fast as her body would let her.

When Sakura walked into the hospital, the nurses at the reception desk looked surprised.

"I thought you clocked out at 7, Sensei," one of the nurses commented, turning around to look at the time piece hanging on the wall. It was nearly 11 now.

"I forgot something in my office. I'll be out in a minute," lied Sakura with a smile. The nurses accepted this excuse without suspicion and waved as she walked on down the hallway. As soon as she rounded the corner, Sakura felt her steps quicken. Her eyes darted around to make sure that no one could see the blind panic rising in her chest. While her feet hurried onward, Sakura focused her chakra, frantically searching for the right signature.

She turned a sharp left and barreled into the ER. Takumi was just swapping out clipboards and nearly ran into her. His eyes widened as he looked at her. And unlike the nurses, he really **looked** at her. Her shallow breaths and the sheen of sweat on her face were indicators that something was terribly wrong. Takumi shoved his clipboard into the arms of the nearest intern and then steered Sakura to a more private corner of the ER.

"Sensei, what's wrong?" he demanded in a hushed voice. Sakura swallowed thickly as she waited for the wave of pain to pass.

"So you know how I'm infertile?" she began in a whisper. Takumi looked startled but he slowly nodded. Their conversations had had stranger openings in the past.

"And you know how the damage to my reproductive organs made me stop menstruating so I need to supplement my hormones with medication?" she continued on. He nodded again, this time with an expression on his face that told her he thought she was insane.

"Well... there's been a...uh...an unexpected turn of events," she told him. Takumi's eyes widened a little bit more. But he looked around, remembering that they were still in a public place.

"Unexpected turn of events?" repeated Takumi.

"I'm bleeding...heavily...from..." Sakura's eyes darted downwards before looking pointedly at her apprentice again. Takumi's eyes copied the motion before shock froze his expression.

"So I'm either hemorrhaging...heavily...from one of those organs. Or... we have a strange situation here," she concluded with a calmness that she did not feel at all.

"...Are you preg-?" he began with a cringe.

"What? No! Of course not!" she snapped.

"But it sounds like-"

"I know what it sounds like. But it's not!" Sakura cut him off again with a hiss. They both stopped talking to shoot furtive looks around. No one else seemed to have noticed their heated exchange.

"Bleeding? And it looks like you're having contractions?" he argued.

"Contractions," she said back to him with a deadpan expression.

"You sort of seize up and make this face, Sensei," Takumi stated.

"Takumi, I'm making 'this face' because I am losing far too much blood."

Their conversation was interrupted by Nozomi's face popping up near Sakura's elbow. She blinked up at them with wide eyes.

"I heard 'hemorrhaging' and 'vagina' so you have to spill," she promptly greeted them. Sakura wondered if it would be more efficient to wait to bleed to death or to throw herself from the top of the hospital building.

"Sensei can't have kids but she's bleeding from her special place and I have no idea what's going on," Takumi promptly told her.

Nozomi blinked too many times. Her eyes slid from Takumi's wide-eyed look to Sakura's grim expression. They then focused in on Sakura's flat stomach before retuning to her teacher's face.

"Well," said Nozomi. She clapped her hands together once as she stood up straight. Putting her hands on Sakura's shoulders, she began steering the other woman out of the ER.

"I came to bully Taku-chan into buying me coffee and I find this instead. My, my," sighed Nozomi as she pushed them down the hall and to the elevator.

After some debate, they decided to take one of the empty rooms in the maternity ward. When one of the older nurses noticed Takumi's erratic behavior, she asked what was going on. Together, Nozomi and Takumi pasted together a lie about a woman in labor who was so shy that she only trusted the two of them to be in the room with her. They all but shoved the lady out of the way as they entered the private room and locked the door behind them.

Takumi walked around in a tight circle as Nozomi helped Sakura change into a standard hospital gown behind the drawn curtain. Both women paused when they saw how much blood was coating Sakura's inner thighs. Putting on a cheerful expression, Nozomi swiftly tied the back shut. After she yanked the curtain back open, Takumi rushed over to help Sakura into the bed.

The pain wasn't constant. It sort of ebbed and flowed enough that it wasn't unbearable. Nozomi sat on the edge of the bed, absently patting Sakura's hand as the three of them conjectured and discussed.

"There is no room in there for a baby," insisted Nozomi. Sakura nodded.

"Definitely. But I've overseen a couple births before and this is what it looks like," added Sakura. Takumi paled.

"So what are you giving birth to...exactly?" he asked.

"I'm not really sure. Better to be prepared. I've seen false pregnancies before but nothing like this," Sakura replied. At this, Takumi mashed his hands into his face.

"Then we need to find someone. I have watched one birth. One. And the woman had a C-section so I don't even know how this is supposed to go. And it's not like Ginkaku-san is going to handle it," he blabbered. Nozomi didn't even seem bothered by the jab.

"It's true. I'm really not that good with the squishy parts," she conceded, "And Kei-chan's off doing research up north until next week. So that's not going to help us."

"Sensei, I feel like you're bleeding an awful lot, though. Are you sure you don't want us to call someone in? Miura-sensei's at home but I'm sure we could call him," began Nozomi again. The Head of Obstetrics was a very friendly man with the demeanor of a caring father. He put all the women at ease and was therefore quite popular. But Sakura had refused three times to call him. There was no need to let everyone in the village find out what was going on.

But as time went on and it was just past 2 in the morning, Nozomi suddenly stood. Clenching her hands at her sides, she moved her mouth, as if silently rehearsing something in her head. Pushing damp bangs out of her face, Sakura waited for the girl to speak. Takumi hovered in the shadows by the door, tensing as he waited to have to pull Nozomi out of the room.

"I'm going to get Miura-sensei! And you can't stop me! There's no way I'm going to sit here while my teacher is in this much pain!" Nozomi loudly announced. Sakura just looked up at her with a weary expression. But before Sakura could voice her assent, Nozomi was already running out of the room.

By the time Nozomi returned with the half-sleeping obstetrician, Sakura was lying on her side. Her hands gripped the railing so hard that her knuckles were white. No sound escaped past her clenched teeth except a tiny keening. Takumi sat in the chair next to the bed with an encyclopedia opened in his lap. The rustle of pages frantically turning as he searched for the right page was accompanied by his half-voiced mutters while he read. Every time another noise squeaked out of Sakura, Takumi flipped faster until his hands were just a nervous blur.

Blinking slowly, the older man straightened his glasses.

"Well," Miura finally said. Sakura raised her head at the sound of his voice. Panting, she tried her best to smile but it came out as a grimace.

"I have certainly been called in the middle of the night for stranger scenarios. How far apart are the pains, Haruno-sensei?" he queried.

Doctor Miura asked a series of questions before he sent Takumi to go get a couple nurses. Despite Sakura's protest, he explained that they would need help in case something went wrong. (Sakura pointed out, "Well, this whole situation itself can't be called right," making the man laugh.)

The contractions grew closer and closer together. And just as the sun peaked over the horizon, something glimmered underneath the hospital gown. Sakura could only watch with limbs rendered limp from her exhaustion as her seal glowed bright blue. A single column of white rose from it. It lengthened and warped into a single arm complete with a hand on the end. The fingers flexed for a moment before they delved straight down into her abdomen. There was a sharp, tearing sensation and then burning around her guts. She bit back her cry of pain as she felt things ripping and twisting until she almost felt like vomiting.

"Okay, Haruno-sensei, I'm going to need you to push. You're losing too much blood and your contractions are really close together," Miura said as he peered between her spread legs. Sakura was long past dignity. She didn't care that her colleague was currently staring at her privates. All she could focus on was the pressure bearing down between the legs that mixed with the strange chaos that the hand was wreaking on its own.

"Push!" the older man urged again.

As Sakura strained and forced her muscles to work, an agonized cry finally left her mouth. All the sounds that she had been holding back finally burst forward. Tears rolled down her cheeks from the strain.

"Okay. You're doing well. One more time," she heard Miura's voice instruct. But this time, he sounded far away. The heat in her stomach was shifting now. She could feel a faint thrum, almost like the feeling of tissue being knit together. But her uterus gave another violent squeeze and all thought was wiped from her mind. A whimper left her as she strained again.. Nozomi's hand was holding hers, giving her something to squeeze each time she pushed. When Sakura opened her eyes, she could see through her wet eyelashes that Takumi was standing next to Miura to assist him.

"Push!"

Letting out a guttural yell, Sakura focused all her energy into the movement. She bore down, grinding her teeth and sobbing as her body seemed to break into pieces. The hand of chakra abruptly pulled out from her body, searing and healing the skin over her bellybutton as it moved. Sakura felt her seal burn intensely hot for another moment before the arm suddenly vanished in a wisp of white smoke.

Her vision started to go fuzzy around the edges. Spots of black danced along her sight as she stared up at the tiles on the ceiling. Voices swirled around her in a meaningless blur.

All she could hear was Takumi yelling "PUSH!" one last time. Gathering the last strength she held, Sakura clenched and pushed as hard as she could. Flopping bonelessly on her back, Sakura listened to the beep of the monitors. She could hear words fly out as the people ran around doing things because it all seemed so unimportant. She was tired. So tired. And it was time for her to sleep now.

Closing her eyes, Sakura let herself fall. And she could feel Nozomi's hand stroke across her forehead once.

"You're done, Sensei. Rest now," Nozomi whispered with startling clarity.

* * *

><p>"No one's come to visit, Sensei," said Takumi from the doorway.<p>

Sakura was on her side, arms curled over her head. She stared out past her limbs, at the windows where she could see rain splashing down. They sky had been the same murky shade of gray for the past two days. A shiver ran through her. Lately she had felt so cold and worn out, like a piece of fabric stretched too tight until the seams began to rip- until it was transparent.

"Good," she finally answered. She rolled onto her back to look at Takumi. It was only then that he moved into the room. He set a paper cup of coffee on the side table and then sat in the chair angled toward the bed.

"The Hokage wanted to talk to you but I said you were very busy with research and couldn't be reached for the next few days. I guess it wasn't that urgent," he reported to her. Sakura had asked everyone to make her unreachable for a while.

Despite what she had believed, the hospital staff was surprisingly good at keeping a secret. If some of the younger trainees were caught gossiping, the older nurses chastised them so thoroughly that no private information would be leaked again. Miura-sensei had asked her a standard set of questions without prying into her life. And then he mostly left her alone, as if he could tell that she really didn't want to see anyone at the moment.

Immediately upon waking the first time, "What was it?" were the first words to slip past her drowsy lips. The IV in the back of her hand pumped her full of painkillers and fluid. After a moment of irritated staring, she ripped the needle from her skin. She didn't want to dull the pain anyway.

"Sensei, you're awake?" Nozomi gasped.

"What," insisted Sakura, squeezing her eyes shut. There was a long pause- longer than what was necessary.

"Um...well... an organ," the girl finally admitted.

"What do you mean?" demanded Sakura. Her words were sharp as her eyes flew open. She tilted her head to look at Nozomi standing on the other side of the room. In her hands was a glass vase with a single yellow carnation in it.

"Well... what we got was... a placenta... and then an umbilical cord and then...the uterus," Nozomi elaborated with some hesitation again.

"Come again?"

"Just... the entire uterus just... ejected itself. Taku-chan's running tests now," said Nozomi.

Sakura placed her arm over her eyes to block out the florescent light.

"I need some time to myself," Sakura whispered.

"Of course."

The door clicked shut after the girl. And Sakura lay there, teeth gritted as she tried her best not to scream with frustration.

But that had been almost two days ago.

Since then, the only human contact Sakura had had were the nurses popping in a few times a day. And even then, Sakura usually just lay there, eyes fixed on the window like she couldn't hear their cheerful attempts at chatter. Only Takumi seemed capable of really getting her to talk. And even then, it was out of necessity and not the desire to speak with someone.

"Can I get you anything, Sensei?" Takumi inquired.

"No. You can't," she answered in a flat, tired voice.

* * *

><p>Uchiha Sasuke came home on Christmas Eve. The poetry of his return wasn't lost on the group. Kiba chortled and gave him a shove, teasing him about how happy Sakura would be to see him.<p>

"We're the perfect Christmas present for her. The pretty one, the sexy one, and the... well... Sai..." finished Kiba on a slightly lame note. Sai gave Kiba a searching look.

"I can see how Uchiha would be the pretty one but you're more like the wayward pet dog coming home," Sai frankly corrected. Akamaru seemed to let out a barking laugh and Kiba shoved his head away. Sasuke glanced Sai's way and was met with an even gaze. Sai's spikiness had improved over the duration of the mission. Sasuke supposed that saving his life once or twice had made the other man more inclined to view him favorably.

"Don't feel bad, Inuzuka. Sakura prefers dogs to cats," said Sasuke.

"My man," sighed Kiba. They bumped fists as they paused on a tree branch. They waited for one of the ANBU guards to pass on his patrol. When he saw their faces, he waved them ahead. It was dark but Sasuke thought he recognized the hawk painted on his mask.

"I'll check in with the Hokage. Don't neglect your individual reports," said Sai. Kiba saluted while Sasuke grunted his acknowledgement. Once they were past the wooden gates of the village, they split up. Sai shot over rooftops, angling straight for the Hokage's tower in the north. Kiba and Sasuke headed in a slightly more easterly direction.

"You should probably get to the hospital," Kiba said as he jerked his head in the direction of Sai's back. Sasuke lightly touched the bandage on his right temple. He had cleaned and bandaged it up but stitches were probably needed too.

"Hate hospitals. I'm going to see if Sakura's around," answered Sasuke.

As they neared the market, Kiba veered sharply, heading toward his house on the east edge of the village. Kiba raised a hand in parting and Akamaru gave a low woof as he followed. As he neared Sakura's house, Sasuke searched for her chakra. It was pretty late and he wasn't sure if she was sleeping or not. But as he stopped in front of her home, Sasuke found that all the windows were dark. A careful sweep of chakra found that it was empty too.

Guessing that she was at the hospital working late again, Sasuke moved on to the next location on his mental list. When he arrived at the large white building a few minutes later, Sasuke did a check for chakra too. He found Takumi, along with Sakura's third student whose name he could never remember. Shiori? Kotomi? At any rate, no Sakura. Since he was here, he considered going in and getting Takumi to patch him up.

Just to be sure, Sasuke went into the hospital and asked if Sakura was working. The receptionist searched through the logs and found that Sakura wasn't currently clocked in. She wasn't in the building. Sighing, Sasuke left the hospital. Then again, maybe Sakura had just worn herself out from a long day of work and was passed out at home with unusually low chakra reserves. He hurried a little to Sakura's place this time.

"Where is she?" he muttered to himself as he pushed past the gate and headed down the stone walkway. When he reached into his back pocket, he pulled out his keyring. On it were three keys all different colors and shapes. The first was for his apartment, the second for his office at work, and the third was for Sakura's place. She had a copy of his key too, just in case something happened.

Even though Sakura had told him that he was free to use it whenever, Sasuke hesitated for a moment. It was different from the last time he had used it. At that time, he was nearly delirious with fever. With a clear mind, it seemed harder to let himself in. But in the end, he knew that not getting his cut treated quickly would bring her wrath and that was the best motivator in the world. He pushed the key into the lock and stepped into the house.

"Sakura," he called out into the dark. But as soon as he set foot in the house, he knew she wasn't there. He took a few more steps down the hall, pausing to peer into the living room. And then, when he took a couple more steps, he reached the door to her bedroom. The door was ajar. When he nudged it open with his elbow, he immediately found the spots of blood on the floor. He smacked the light switch to flood the room with light.

In the middle of her bed, on the bright white sheets was a dark stain of dried blood. Her drawers were still partially opened and some of the things were knocked over onto the floor. Her closet was open too, sweaters yanked off the hangers and tossed carelessly wherever. Sucking in a sharp breath, Sasuke searched the rest of the house for any signs of an intruder. No doors or windows were forced. There were bloody tissues in the bathroom trashcan. But that was the only other clue he could find. Grabbing the bloodied sheet, Sasuke rushed out of Sakura's house. He ran to the hospital this time. Bursting into the reception, he approached the same startled woman as before.

"I'm sorry. Haruno-sensei's still not here," she stuttered out.

"No. Get me Kiyomizu," Sasuke practically snarled. Hands shaking, the woman paged Takumi as calmly as she could. When Takumi walked down the hall, he caught sight of Sasuke and froze in his tracks. Putting on his best smile, he walked up to the man.

"Oh, Uchiha-san. Hello. What can I do for you?" greeted Takumi.

"Where's Sakura?" asked Sasuke in a surprisingly level voice. The murder in his eyes did not match with the calm tone at all.

"Sensei's not here. She isn't at home?" questioned Takumi in response.

"She's not home. So she's here. What're you hiding?" growled Sasuke. He took a step toward Takumi, the threat clear in his movement. Takumi cleared his throat.

"What? I'm not hiding anything. She's just not here," Takumi immediately replied. As Sasuke's irises bled into the crimson sharingan, the receptionist made a panicked noise somewhere between a squawk and a squeal.

"She's in 471! Please stop causing a scene!" the woman blurted out as Sasuke took another menacing step forward. Takumi shot her a look of utter exasperation. Sasuke didn't even bother to look at her. Her shoved past Takumi on his way to the stairs.

"Uchiha-san, please! Visiting hours are over already!" Takumi argued as he ran after Sasuke's brisk strides. Sasuke ignored him completely as he hurried up the stairs, taking two at a time in his haste. Takumi's quick steps echoed around them.

"She's in no shape to see anyone!" yelled Takumi when they reached the fourth floor. As Sasuke began looking for the right room number, Takumi grabbed his shoulder and spun him around.

"She doesn't want to see you. She doesn't want to see anyone," Takumi insisted in a firm voice. Venom burned in Sasuke's stare. A slow smirk stretched his mouth as the sharingan darkened into brown again.

"Fuck off, kid. You don't know her," he spat. Sasuke shoved Takumi into the wall and then stepped into the room. He shut the door with his foot, quickly turning the lock so no one would interfere.

It was dark in the room. All the lights were off but the blinds were opened. Sakura lay in the bed, her pale hair tangled around her. Even in the dim light, the sallowness of her drawn features was clear. Exhaling deeply through her nostrils, Sakura slowly opened her eyes. Her stare focused in on him over what seemed like a million years. But she didn't smile like she always did.

Not saying anything, Sasuke tossed the crumpled sheet onto the foot of the bed. The blood stain was clearly visible and it was only then that Sakura's gaze lit up a little with understanding.

"I'm okay," she assured him in a whisper.

"You're a shit liar, Sakura," Sasuke scoffed in a tight voice.

Sakura finally smiled. The expression was all brittle and tired but it was still her smile. She raised her right hand toward him, a welcoming gesture. Sasuke glared at her for an extra moment before he moved over to the side of the bed. Leaning over, he pressed his forehead against hers. Her skin felt so cold. Her hand rested on his forearm, curling around it lightly.

"Did I scare you? I'm sorry," murmured Sakura. Sasuke closed his eyes.

"Lying again," he grunted.

"Yeah," she agreed.

She began to cry, sobbing in that sad, inconsolable way that a child cries. And he didn't ask her to explain as he held her. Breathing in the harsh smells of antiseptics and medicine, Sasuke tucked his other arm under Sakura's back and hugged her until she stopped shaking.

And that took a very, very long time.


	14. Coralberry

I think that this might be the most medical-jargon-heavy chapter yet. No apologies. If I could google it, so can you.

First chapter of the new year. I should honestly be more proud of myself for getting this done in less than a month. But alas, I lack even the energy for excitement. However, I would like to take this little section here to sincerely thank everyone for their feedback. Thank you for your favorites and your watches and your reviews. Thank you to everyone who left encouragement and constructive criticism. My wish this year is to be a better writer and to not cry over how much work I'll have to do this upcoming semester. (Guess which goal is plausible and which isn't.)

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 14: Coralberry

"As you can see, the overall volume of patients has decreased substantially so I think that we can cut the number of students we select this year," said Kei as she pointed out the graph. Sakura flipped through the pages once before she looked up again.

"That's a very good point. We'll restrict the initial pool from 50 to 25 this year. And from there, we'll pick 5 instead of 10 students. Any other news?"

Kei shook her head as she wrote down the instructions.

"Then I'll see you tomorrow," sighed Sakura, turning her head away. Kei hesitated for a moment, looking around the room. But then she gave a short bow and left.

"You're being cold. I thought you liked her," Sasuke commented from his spot by the window. He fiddled with the cords on the blinds, opening and closing them.

"I do. I love her to pieces. But I'm just sick of being stuck here. I want to go home," Sakura grumbled. She crossed her arms over her chest.

"And do what? Chug beers and forget to eat?" he countered. Expression souring, Sakura shot him a nasty look.

"Fuck you," she growled. Snapping the blinds shut, Sasuke walked over to her. His silhouette hovered in front of her for a moment before he sat on the edge of the bed. When he leaned in closer, she could make out his features again. His mouth curled upwards, eyebrows drawing together.

"Do you want to sneak out?" Sasuke asked.

Sakura sighed.

"And do what? It's raining and it's cold. I'd rather be in here than out there," she said. Sasuke's left eyebrow arched.

"I thought one of the treatments for postpartum depression was avoiding isolation," Sasuke argued.

"Yes, but postpartum generally deals with after someone's given birth to a human child. And plus, I'm not isolated. I've got your cheerful self to keep me company," she scoffed in return. Sasuke looked unimpressed.

"Look, your brat-" Sakura interrupted him with a glare. Sasuke started over again.

"_Kiyomizu_ said that for the time being, we should treat this like an after-birth scenario since your body went through all the same motions. Besides, if we sneak out, we could go get dumplings. And anmitsu afterwards," he said.

At the mention of anmitsu, Sakura's expression softened. There was a twinkle in her eye as she imagined the jelly mixed with fruits and red bean. And she knew exactly which restaurant Sasuke was talking about because they had gotten lunch there before. The anmitsu came with a generous scoop of ice cream there, mixing all the different sweet flavors together into a syrupy puddle at the bottom of the dish.

Sasuke saw the look on her face and knew he had won.

"I brought you some clothes. Get changed," he said, pointing to the black bag on the chair next to the bed. He stood to go open up the blinds again, filling the room with gray light. Puzzled, Sakura reached over to open it up. Inside were a few of her sweaters, along with leggings and a pair of black pants. Underneath were a few articles of more delicate clothing that Sakura noticed Sasuke was careful not to look at.

"I asked Sasaki and she said you might want something to wear but I wasn't sure what to bring," he explained.

"Did you have any trouble picking out the underwear?" Sakura teased. She clearly saw color tinge the tips of Sasuke's ears at that.

"Shut up, Sakura," he muttered, stalking out of the room.

Smiling to herself, Sakura ran her fingers along the soft knit fabric. She was always so surprised whenever anyone else looked out for her. She was always running around looking after so many other people that it was startling whenever the act was returned to her. Casting a quick glance toward the window, Sakura picked out one of the sweaters and slowly dragged her body out of the bed to take a shower.

The hospital soaps and shampoos weren't of the best quality. They left her with a vague soapy smell and nothing more, which Sakura supposed was better than reeking of blood or whatever else. She pulled on the sweater. It was a light mustard color with a thick cable knit. She put on the leggings and then a pair of socks the hospital had given her. As she leaned against the bed to pull on her boots, the door opened a little.

'I took an umbrella from the break room. I'm going to pretend I thought it was yours," announced Sasuke. Sakura glanced up and saw the dark blue umbrella resting against the door.

"That's Takumi's," she told him while pulling on the other boot.

"Even better," he scoffed without remorse.

"I don't get why you hate him so much all of the sudden," sighed Sakura as she stood. She pulled on her coat, buttoning it up all the way.

"He's annoying. Always telling me to leave. Lying about where you were in the first place," replied Sasuke. That threw her for a moment. She hadn't expected him to really answer her so honestly. Most guys were content to grunt and glower at each other without really articulating their reasons for disliking one another. Like with Sai and Sasuke.

"Men," Sakura simply huffed as she pulled her hood up.

They easily managed to dodge the hospital staff on the way out. As they approached the break room, Sakura quickly grabbed Sasuke, pulling him around the corner. Because just then, Takumi strode out into the hallway with an exasperated groan.

"Has anyone seen my umbrella?" he said to no one in particular. Sakura felt a little guilty when she saw how distraught he was, but it was just so funny to her. Sasuke crouched at her side with the little navy umbrella tucked under his arm. When their eyes met, Sasuke seemed to read her mind because he quirked a small smile.

"Has anyone seen Sasaki-san?" Takumi yelled next. He was probably going to borrow hers instead. Sasuke and Sakura seized this opportunity to hurry past Takumi while he stuck his head back in the break room They ran down the stairs together, Sakura struggling not to giggle like a little kid pulling a prank on someone. They ducked out of the hospital and into the cold rain. It wasn't pouring like it had been all morning but the water didn't show any indications that it was planning to stop falling from the sky anytime soon.

But with the umbrella covering them, Sakura found that she didn't mind the weather as much. She knew that if she was too far away, Sasuke would let his shoulder get soaked just to keep her dry. With this in mind, she stuck close to Sasuke's side. He pushed and prodded her until she moved to his right, something that she didn't understand until someone on a bicycle sped past. The wheels splashed through a puddle, nearly soaking Sasuke if he hadn't dodged quickly. Smiling a little to herself, she pretended to not get that he was shielding her with his body.

When they finally reached the restaurant, Sakura waited for Sasuke to toss the umbrella into the stand to dry. When the hostess looked at them, Sakura held up two fingers. They were led to a little table in the corner where Sasuke took the seat facing the door like he always did. Sakura wondered if it was some sort of habit he had picked from being an outlaw. He never seemed comfortable turning his back to the unknown.

Lowering her hood, Sakura sunk into her own seat.

"Can we get some hot tea, please?" requested Sakura as they were handed menus.

"Sui-gyoza or age-gyoza?" asked Sasuke as he flipped idly through the laminated pages.

"Sui-gyoza. I'm in the mood for nice, soft, boiled dumplings," she immediately answered. They quickly picked out a couple other dishes to split and ordered when the waiter came with their tea. Since the lunch rush had yet to arrive, service was fast. Sakura dipped her dumpling in soy sauce and popped it into her mouth. She swung her legs back and forth as she chewed.

"Okay. I admit it. This was a good decision. This tastes so much better than hospital food," sighed Sakura, reaching for another dumpling. Sasuke picked up a slice of tofu between his chopsticks with a slightly smug look.

It wasn't just the upgraded food. Being outside of the hospital seemed to lift Sakura's spirits. Staying cooped up in the little room had started to make her a little stir crazy. Sasuke visiting every day had been helpful but not an instant fix.

"When are they letting you out?" asked Sasuke. At this, Sakura deflated. She pushed the last gyoza to Sasuke in favor of drinking some tea.

"They're still running tests and they won't let me help. Everyone's ganged up and they won't let me come back to work until they're sure I'm okay. I'm signing myself out tomorrow morning," she complained. Sasuke stared at her.

"You are the only person I know that complains about not having to work," he said. Sakura rolled her eyes.

"Is it so strange that I like my job?" huffed Sakura.

"You don't like your job. You're obsessed with it," Sasuke corrected with a pointed look. Unruffled, Sakura pretended to toss her hair.

"Don't be jealous, Sa-su-ke," she teased. She drew out the syllables of his name, accenting each one by poking her pointer finger into the back of his hand.

They stared each other for a long moment before Sasuke shook his head with what was unmistakably a sort of fondness. Leaning back in his seat, he let out a deep breath. Their gazes met again before Sakura began to laugh. And he chuckled quietly. What they were precisely laughing about wasn't really certain but they were both happy.

They finished up the meal in high spirits. As they waited for the bill, Sakura glanced around the restaurant a few times. There were still a few Christmas decorations scattered around here and there. A colorful wreath on the wall. Strings of lights tangled along the ceiling beams.

"I missed Christmas," she commented out loud. Sasuke nodded while taking a sip of tea.

"What did your parents say about that? Don't you usually spend Christmas with them?" Sasuke queried. A grim expression crossed Sakura's face.

"I lied. Sent a message that I was called on an emergency mission. I'm going over for New Year's tomorrow, though," she explained. And then there was a glimmer of something in her eye as she looked at him.

"What're you doing tomorrow?" she asked in turn. Sasuke's head turned to look out the window. There was a sudden fragility to his reflection in the window. The glass was a little foggy and fat droplets of water rolled down it on the other side. It was in that reflection that she saw Sasuke's eyes flicker over his shoulder toward her.

"...That's kind of a dumb question, Sakura. I don't have a family to celebrate with," Sasuke said in a flat voice. But Sakura had anticipated such a response. In all her excitement, she didn't even apologize for her words.

"You should come celebrate with us!" she suggested. Sasuke's shoulders tensed up a little. He finally turned his head to look at her again with scrutiny in his gaze.

"What?"

"Well, since Naruto and Sai don't have families either, it's kind of become a tradition for them to join us. Naruto's spending New Year's with the Hyuuga's this year so he'll be missing. But still..." Sakura trailed off when she realized that only Sai would be joining them then. And she knew that Sasuke and Sai weren't the biggest fans of one another. That thought seemed to occur to Sasuke as he thought but then his expression evened out.

"I haven't seen your mother since I was a kid...And I've never met your father."

That surprised Sakura. That Sasuke would worry about that first was so unexpected. She had anticipated him to complain about being with Sai or wanting to have time to rest. But instead, it was about her parents. Well, that was certainly a protest easily neutralized.

"It's fine. Mom and Dad are really easy-going. And I promise to punch Sai if he gets too obnoxious," she assured him. As Sasuke deliberated, the bill arrived. Sakura dug into her pocket for her half of the bill and set it down in the little plastic tray.

"You'd be hitting him all night," Sasuke commented with a little snort.

Setting his own coins down, Sasuke slowly nudged them into piles with his fingers. The little bits of metal clinked together.

"Alright," he finally assented.

A smile lit up Sakura's face.

"Great! Come hungry. My mom makes **way** too much food!"

Sasuke headed to work. There had been some news from one of their field agents and Sasuke was needed. He almost looked ready to kick the messenger in the face when he appeared in the restaurant. It wasn't that Sasuke had glowered outright. It was the subtle change in his already stern expression. A furrow in his brow, a certain quirk to his lips.

"Sounds important. I can get back to the hospital on my own," urged Sakura, nudging Sasuke's foot under the table with her own. They both looked toward the window. It was still raining and they had only brought one umbrella. In fact, the Chunin sent as the messenger had damp hair and water-stained clothes.

"I'll see you tomorrow," said Sasuke as he got up. Sakura waggled her fingers at him in a wave as he pulled on his coat.

Sasuke sighed as he and the Chunin walked toward the exit. The Chunin snickered.

"I'd be pissed if Morino called me in during a date too, Uchiha," he commented.

"It's not a date," grunted Sasuke.

"That was totally date," Sakura heard the Chunin comment before the door swung shut behind them.

Sakura lingered for a few extra minutes before she too stood and left. She easily snuck back into the hospital without being detected.. By the time Takumi was back to check on her, she was sitting up in her bed, leafing through one of her old medical journals. He seemed surprised to see her dressed and clean after so many days of lying bonelessly in her bed.

"How do you feel, Sensei?" he cautiously inquired. It wasn't without reason. She hadn't exactly been sunshine and rainbows these past few days.

"Better. Why're you all wet?" answered Sakura. His hair was a medium shade of brown when it was damp. Cheeks turning pink, Takumi cleared his throat.

"I couldn't find my umbrella so I ran to go pick up lunch." he admitted.

Sakura had to try hard to hold back her laugh. She had stuck the umbrella back from where it had been "borrowed". But from its dampness, she knew that Takumi would guess that someone had used it. His wondering gaze made it clear that he didn't suspect her in the least. Checking her vitals, he nodded approvingly and marked the numbers down on her chart.

"Takumi," Sakura suddenly called. Eyes widening, he looked up at her.

"Nozomi's moved to Pathology for research. Kei wants to go more into surgery. What do you want to do?" she queried. Takumi dropped her chart into the slot at the foot of the bed with a noisy clatter. Eyes narrowing into almost a squint, Takumi stared at her.

"Sensei, am I your student?" he asked in return.

"Of course you are!" she answered.

"Are Ginkaku-san and Sasaki-san your students too?" he went on to interrogate.

"Yes," Sakura replied with a slight edge to her voice this time. But then she realized where he was leading her with all these questions.

"But you're my apprentice. And you swore to follow me," she added. Takumi nodded.

"I didn't come to you just for learning about medicine and healing, Sensei. I wanted to learn everything from you. And that means that I basically stick to your side until you get sick of me and punch me out a window," he told her.

Sakura was quiet for a long time. She could see the unease building in Takumi as she didn't respond and instead stared at him.

"...You're kind of an idiot, aren't you?" she finally asked.

Takumi shrugged.

"Yeah," he agreed. A little laugh spurted out of Sakura.

"The smartest idiot I know," she sighed before turning back to the window.

* * *

><p>On New Year's day, Uchiha Sasuke arrived at the Haruno family's home at noon precisely. He pushed the button for the doorbell, wondering if it would be better to knock instead. But he heard footsteps long before the front door slid open. Eyes bright with excitement, Sakura greeted him.<p>

"Hi!" she exclaimed like she hadn't seen him less than 24 hours ago.

Sakura's hair, which had grown out a lot, was pulled off to the side in a messy braid. She was wearing an ivory sweater with the sleeves pushed up to her elbows. As she motioned for him to come inside, there were another set of footsteps. Sakura's mother came out to greet him too. Her hair was pulled up into a bun- the same shade of pink as Sakura's with a lot of graying roots. Her face was round and lined but distinctly soft. When she smiled, the corners of her eyes crinkled.

"Oh, hello, Sasuke-kun. So glad you could make it!" Hisako said.

"Look, Mom, Sasuke brought pears!" Sakura needlessly pointed out.

From an early age, Sasuke had been taught that when he went to someone's house, he had to bring a gift. Usually some kind of fruit was the best option. Cakes and desserts were a good choice too. So he had picked up a box of the big Asian pears that Sakura loved.

"Oh my! You didn't have to! That's very thoughtful of you. Come inside. It's cold," Hisako gushed, ushering him into the foyer. She shut the door behind him while he took off his shoes. Sakura took the box from his arms to take to the kitchen.

"Look how much you've grown. I haven't seen you since you were a tiny little thing," Hisako chattered merrily. She took Sasuke's coat to hang it in the hall closet. And then, with the kind but strong hands of a mother, she guided him to the living room where an older man sat rubbing at his knee under the kotatsu. He looked up. From the way his grimace stretched into an open smile, Sasuke could see Sakura echoed in those expressions. Sasuke bowed respectfully and when he straightened, he could see a glint of approval in Yuusuke's gaze.

"It's good to finally meet the famous _Sasuke-kun_," was all Yuusuke said.

"Dad!" Sakura called in a scolding tone as she came out of the kitchen. She walked into the living room with a scowl. She stood next to Sasuke, arms crossed over her chest.

"What? I only said he was famous," Yuusuke claimed with the face of perfect innocence.

"Stop making him feel uncomfortable. You're terrible. Go sit down, Sasuke. Dinner will be ready soon," Sakura said with a groan. She looked ready to say something else but then Hisako called her name from somewhere else in the house.

"Coming!" Sakura called back, already turning on her heel.

When Sakura returned to call everyone over for dinner, she found Sasuke sitting under the kotatsu with her father. She had always enjoyed sitting under the heated table with the thick blanket draped over it to trap the warmth inside too. The warmth was always comforting and enough to make her drowsy on her lazier days. Sasuke's back was straight, a sure sign that he wasn't relaxed, but that was to be expected. His head tilted toward her when she paused in the doorway. The movement alerted Yuusuke and he looked up to notice her too.

"Is dinner ready? Have you seen Sai around?" asked Yuusuke. Sakura paused for a moment to feel for the right chakra signature.

"Oh, I guess he's still clearing icicles in the back. I'll get him," answered Sakura. She headed down the narrow hallway and opened up the door to the back porch. She spotted the old wooden ladder propped up against the side of the house. There was a creak, a thump, and then a noisy clatter as icicles broke off and shattered on the ground.

"Sai, time for dinner. I'll help you finish that after," she told him, peering up at through the rungs. There was a pause and then Sai descended a couple steps. His normally pale cheeks were tinted bright red from the cold. The muffler he had borrowed from her father was wound securely around his throat and mouth. He hooked a gloved finger into the top of the scarf to expose his mouth before he spoke.

"Just a couple left. I'll be in shortly," Sai insisted.

Sakura held onto the ladder while she waited for him to finish. It really did only take a little bit to knock off the rest of the ice before climbing back down. Sakura picked up the ladder with one hand to prop it up against the back fence where it belonged. Patting Sai's shoulder, she led him back inside where he took off his shoes and moved to set them in the foyer.

"Thank you so much for your help, Sai-kun. With my husband's leg, he can't get up on that ladder anymore. Normally we ask the boy next door but we didn't want to call him over on a holiday," said Hisako when she saw them. Sai pulled off his hat and scarf to rub at his cheeks and reddened nose.

"It's no trouble. I'll wash my hands and join everyone for dinner," answered Sai with a smile. Sakura grabbed the wad of scarf from his hands and helped him yank off the bulky gloves along with his jacket.

"Go. I'll put these away," insisted Sakura when he looked ready to protest her help. He headed down the hall while Sakura went to hang his jacket in the closet. In a few minutes, everyone was gathered around the dining room table to marvel at the food that had been prepared the day before. Mashed sweet potato and chestnuts seemed to sparkle bright gold. The shrimp glistened pink, nestled between fish roe and shiny black soybeans. Laughing, Hisako pushed the box filled with the most salmon roe toward Sakura. The bright red color of the eggs had always made them a favorite with Sakura ever since she was a little girl.

"The ikura's supposed to be good for fertility. Have a lot and give us some grandkids," Yuusuke chuckled, catching onto his wife's joke.

"Oh, but not before you get married first," he added almost as an afterthought.

"Kids these days. The order doesn't matter much, does it?" Hisako answered.

Sakura, who had been pouring tea, nearly sloshed the hot liquid out. Sasuke, holding the cup out for her, looked at her with wide eyes. Neither of them said anything while the well-meaning parents laughed together.

"But really, dear, you haven't met anyone nice at the hospital? Friend of a friend, maybe? You know, Ino-chan's mother was telling me about this nice young man-" Hisako continued while they began to eat. Trying her best to smile, Sakura cleared her throat.

"No, Mom, there's no one," Sakura interrupted as firmly as she could without sounding rude.

"You're 26 now, Sakura. Ino-chan's already married and so is your friend Tenten. That nice Hyuuga girl is marrying Naruto-kun soon. You're the only one left," reminded Hisako. Sasuke sat between them, chewing his soybeans too many times as he monitored the look on Sakura's face. She could feel the heat rising up the back of her neck and warming her ears. This definitely wasn't a conversation she wanted to have at this moment.

"Honey, I think that's enough about that," Yuusuke gently interceded, clearly noticing the flush rising to Sakura's face. Sakura smiled her thanks to her father as he redirected talk to a safer topic.

"Sakura tells me you're working with the Intelligence Division. How's that been?" Yuusuke began as he nodded at Sasuke.

"It's good. I get my own office and it's mostly a desk job," replied Sasuke. The stiffness of his words made Sakura smile a little despite her lingering embarrassment. She glanced over at Sasuke's food and realized that he had only really been eating his soup. Because they traditionally were not supposed to cook on New Year's, most of the dishes prepared beforehand were either covered with vinegar or sugar in order to keep them from spoiling. Sakura had always looked forward to osechi ryori for this reason. It was sweet and tart and crunchy- all things she liked.

"You hate sweet things," Sakura whispered when her father began speaking with Sai. Sasuke glanced at her casually.

"So?"

"What do you mean 'so'? There's nothing on the menu you like," she snorted.

"Sakura, this is all traditional stuff that I've been eating since I was a kid. I'll manage somehow," he told her. Somehow Hisako's ears caught their quiet words.

"Sasuke-kun bought all his osechi at our restaurant for years," added Hisako. Sakura started. Her parents' store was less of a restaurant and more of a place to pick up food to take home. They sometimes catered too but they did really well around New Year's when everyone seemed to be looking for food to buy for the holidays while most stores were closing. Some of the little grocery stores sold them too but Hisako's bentos were well-known among housewives.

"How come I don't remember you ever coming in to the store? I used to help out when I was little," demanded Sakura with suspicion. At this, Sasuke put down his chopsticks across his box to look at her. She recognized the laughter in his eyes even though his mouth was completely somber.

"I might have been avoiding you. You in your preteen years wasn't exactly pleasant on the ears," he stated. Sakura's eyes narrowed even as she took in his words. After some thought, she sighed.

"True. But you weren't exactly a ball of sunshine either," she responded. There was another pause.

"Touché."

The rest of dinner passed pleasantly. Now that Hisako wasn't bringing up marriage and babies every moment, there was room for a plethora of other topics. Sakura talked about her interns and her work. Hisako chatted about the store and the strange customers they had gotten, while Yuusuke supplied details that she sometimes forgot. There was a lot of joking at one another's expenses that was quickly amended by genuine laughter.

When dinner was done, everyone leaned back in their chairs to compliment Hisako's cooking skills. Sakura stood and began gathering up the containers and utensils to go wash.

"Sai-kun, would you mind helping her out? There's a lot of things to clean up," requested Hisako. For a brief moment, Sai made eye contact with Sakura. He then glanced Sasuke's way before he gave a polite smile.

"I think it would only be fair for Uchiha to help out. A man has to earn his meals," answered Sai. Hisako and Yuusuke laughed together. They had immediately taken a liking to Sai for his good manners. Even though he was awkward at times, Sakura had explained his background to her parents enough that they were willing to overlook the fumbles here and there. Sakura didn't exactly know what Sai was up to but she fixed him with a suspicious glare as she came back to take more things to wash.

"So Sai, tell us. Anyone new in your life lately? I know a wonderful young lady who-" When Hisako began talking, Sakura practically fled into the kitchen with Sasuke following.

Breathing out a loud sigh, Sakura dumped the rest of the things into the sink where she had already filled it up with warm, soapy water. Even though some splashed onto her shirt, she didn't really care. Leaning heavily against the counter, she pushed her bangs out of her eyes. Sasuke deposited chopsticks and spoons into the sink more carefully before he stopped to stand in front of her.

"You know, I think my mom's been nagging me about grandkids since I turned 18," huffed Sakura. She glanced over her shoulder at the sink.

"I'll wash, you dry?" she added. Sasuke moved to pick up a clean rag. He waited patiently for Sakura to pull on the bright pink rubber gloves and dunk her hands into the soapy water. Picking up a plate, she began scrubbing bits of food off it with a sponge.

"Anyway," Sakura sighed as she handed the plate off to Sasuke, "My mom's only like that during New Year's so it's not that bad. I just think she's getting more desperate with each year." There was a pause where she expected Sasuke to say anything in response. But he was just looking at her, holding up the dry plate in his hand.

"Where do these go?" he inquired.

"Plates and bowls in the cabinet right in front of you. Cups are the one to the left of it. Chopsticks and spoons go in the drawer to your left," she recited.

"You never told your parents?" asked Sasuke as he stacked the plate in the cabinet and shut the door. It took Sakura a second to process.

"About my medical problems? No," she replied.

"Why not?"

Sakura handed off a pair of chopsticks. He wiped them dry and then leaned on his left elbow on the counter to peer up at her face. Sakura shrugged.

"That would shatter her dreams. It's better for her to think that I just don't want kids than to be told that she'll never have her grandkids to hold," Sakura told him. But Sasuke didn't seem convinced.

"If she knew, it would save you all that pain of having to listen to her talk about it," he pointed out to her.

"I would much rather be sad than let my mother be sad, Sasuke-kun," she answered in a solemn tone.

They didn't say anything else. But they washed and dried dishes in a quick little assembly line without discomfort. When they were finished, Sakura rinsed down the sink too before picking out a couple of the pears and washing them in warm water. As she ran her fingers over the slightly rough skins, she felt Sasuke's eyes on her.

"Are you okay?" Sasuke queried in his calm, deep voice. Sakura looked down at the pear cradled in her hands. The outside peel was a dark yellow, bordering on brown color. It was surprisingly heavy for its size and when she squeezed, she could feel the firmness of the fruit.

"Yeah," she answered as she looked up at him.

And to her surprise, she was telling the truth.

Sakura picked up a fruit knife and headed out of the kitchen. Everyone had moved to the living to be under the warm kotatsu. Sakura set down a tray on the table before placing the round fruit on top of it.

"My, these look wonderful, Sasuke-kun. You must have a good eye for picking fruit," commented Hisako as he too exited the kitchen. He looked around for a moment at the square table. The two parents sat at adjacent sides while Sai and Sakura took up the remaining too sides. Seeing his quandary, Sakura motioned for him to sit beside her.

"I've got skinny legs. Plenty of room for you," she told him.

"I just picked whichever fruit looked unbruised," admitted Sasuke while sitting. Sakura snorted. She carefully cut into the pear, slicing just beneath the skin. The knife moved at a steady angle while her life hand spun the fruit. The peel spiraled down, neatly shedding itself from the rough white fruit underneath.

"That's still a talent. I've been married for what seems like forever and she still doesn't like whatever I bring home when I go shopping," said Yuusuke with a fond pat on the knee for his wife.

Sasuke's eyes were fixated on the way that Sakura neatly sliced wedges of pear off and arranged them on the plate. What was left was the core that contained the seeds, stem, and leftover chunks of fruit. Instead of throwing it out along with the discarded skin, Sakura handed it off to her father. Nodding approvingly, Yuusuke bit into the crunchy fruit. Thinking quickly, Sasuke stuck a fork into one of the wedges and offered it to Hisako with both hands.

"Oh thank you. Such a polite young man," commented Hisako as she accepted. Sasuke glanced Sai's way before he speared another piece on a fork and handed it off to him. Though there was much less deference in this action, Sakura supposed it was as polite as she had ever seen Sasuke being to Sai.

"This pear is so juicy!" exclaimed Hisako.

"A fine choice," Yuusuke agreed after swallowing a big bite.

"Do you remember that time we went on that stupid mission helping that farmer?" began Sakura as she nudged Sasuke's foot. He picked up a piece of pear for himself.

"He had us weeding his radishes for hours. I thought my back would give out," answered Sasuke with a scowl.

"I wanted to pull out one of those damn things and beat him to death with it. And he was lying there in the shade drinking tea all day too," Sakura agreed.

"Didn't Naruto throw fertilizer on him?" said Sasuke. Sakura looked up with a thoughtful expression.

"You know, I always thought it was him too but he doesn't remember that. I think that might have been Kakashi," she told him. He shook his head.

"Yeah, but at the end of the day, we went to that market and bought some pears. They were cold from the shade and we bit into them without washing them. It was like nectar from heaven," Sakura sighed. She picked up another fruit and began peeling it.

"When was this?" inquired Hisako. There was a twinkle in her eye that Sakura pointedly ignored.

"Hmm... when we were 12? So 14 years ago," Sakura calculated in her head. She looked over at Sasuke to confirm and he nodded slightly.

"That's kind of like when Sakura was really little. We went to visit my mother's house in the south. There's a persimmon tree in her yard," Yuusuke chimed in with a smile.

They listened to each other tell stories, reliving old memories and poking fun at the ones they loved most. Sakura leaned forward, laughing hard and watching intently whenever someone spoke. Sai leaned back on his hands, more than happy to listen but not really saying much. He supplied forgotten details and jabbed at Sakura sometimes but didn't interrupt the flow of conversation. And Sasuke was unsurprisingly more on the quiet side as well. He took in the stories, rolling his eyes at the tales of Naruto's antics and lightly pushing Sakura whenever she collapsed into giggles against his side.

At one point, Sakura stopped to complain that Sasuke was squishing her. No one bothered to point out that it was because the two of them had been drawing closer and closer as the night went on. (Actually, Hisako kept quiet to avoid being yelled at, Yuusuke did so to avoid conflict, and Sai didn't mention it for the sake of not being kicked...or punched... or thrown out the window.)

"Maybe you just got fat," Sasuke said. A gasp rose from Hisako and Yuusuke. Sai's eyes widened too and he hastily drank some water in case Sakura demanded to know if it was true. But instead, she gave him a smug look.

"Maybe there's just no room for you and your overinflated ego," she snapped back, and then promptly erupted into giggles. Scoffing incredulously, he gave her a light shove and she shoved right back.

After tea and sticky rice cakes, they called it a night. Sai headed off to the south where his newly-restored house sat waiting. Sakura lingered a little, waiting for her mom to pack her some leftovers along with some of the uneaten pears. She did the same for Sasuke, offering the two of them identical plastic bags stacked with containers.

"It was so good to finally see you again, Sasuke-kun. Come again! We'd be glad to have you," said Hisako as she smiled fondly at the man. Yuusuke offered him a firm handshake, offering the same sentiment in a different way. And then Sakura leaned in to hug both her parents.

"And you, young lady, take good care of yourself. You've lost weight again!" scolded Hisako half-seriously. Sakura's smile faltered slightly but she quickly composed herself. Bidding her parents goodnight, she shooed them inside, out of the cold.

"That wasn't so bad," Sakura said to Sasuke as they began walking. Their footfalls matched up, tapping down the packed dirt road together. Sakura snuggled her chin into her muffler as she peered up at him. It was hard to tell what he was thinking when most of his face was in shadows.

"It wasn't," Sasuke finally agreed after a long moment. Their eyes met and Sakura burst into a wide grin. Bumping into his side, she let out a little laugh.

"It would be nice if it could be like this all the time. Just... happy, you know?" she remarked. Her last word came out as a sigh, sending a puff of white into the cold air.

"Yeah," replied Sasuke, "It would be."

* * *

><p>"Ino, what're you doing here?" Sasuke heard Shikamaru say. Rubbing at his tired eyes, Sasuke got up to go get coffee. He had never been much of a coffee-drinker but hanging out with Sakura and working a desk job had cultivated a taste for the bitter caffeine. It wasn't as good as tea but it sure as hell had more of a kick to it. When he left his office, he found several of his coworkers sitting in their rolling chairs in the doorways, poking their heads out to see what the fuss was about.<p>

"Back from our honeymoon! I brought souvenirs!" Ino exclaimed, holding out a gift bag tied with ribbon. With a puzzled expression, Shikamaru accepted it and peered into it. Sasuke raised a hand in greeting on his way to the coffee machine.

"Trout sushi?" Shikamaru said.

"It's the area's specialty. It was that or prawn crackers. And I know you don't like those," answered Ino with a sniff.

"Thanks. I'm surprised Chouji didn't eat these on the way back," Shikamaru returned. Ino smacked him in the arm. As Sasuke stood pouring reheated coffee into a foam cup, he felt Ino approaching. Since she worked on a different floor in the building, he rarely ever saw her at work. He had never particularly liked Ino (probably stemming from her obsession over him in their childhood), but Sakura always spoke well of her. When he turned, he took a sip of his coffee so he wouldn't have to speak first.

"I got you some too. I promise it's not sweet," Ino told him with a winning grin. Slowly lowering his cup, Sasuke accepted the bag. Out of habit, he looked inside. But instead of one container, he found two.

"Ah, I put Sakura's in there too. Could you give it to her? You definitely see her more than I do," added Ino. The false innocence in her voice drew Sasuke's scrutinizing stare.

"I've been hearing rumors that you two have been stuck together like glue lately," she stated in a lower tone. She matched his gaze with a level look. Suddenly, Sasuke understood when Shikamaru said that Ino had the capacity to be a terrifying being.

"We aren't 'stuck together'," replied Sasuke in an equally calm voice.

Then, as if the universe were playing a cruel prank on him, there was a little poof of smoke. When it cleared, a little slug was lying on the big table in the middle of the room. The break room also served as a conference room so it necessitated the almost too-large table. Heads turned toward the unusual guest. Some of the other employees outright rolled down the hall in their chairs while the remaining simply left their desks to walk out.

"Isn't that one of Sakura's?" remarked Ino. She tilted her head to one side while wrinkling her nose. It was no secret that Ino didn't feel particularly fond of slimy things.

Sasuke observed the white gastropod with the light green markings on its sides. There was a sort of harness rigged around its body to hold the large scroll on its back. He didn't recall ever seeing this particular one before. Shikamaru, however, seemed to be familiar with it.

"Futa, you're early," greeted Shikamaru. The slug turned around on the table to face the man.

"Shikamaru-san, here are the notes you wanted. Sakura-san says to return them in two days or she'll have everyone's heads," the slug warned. Nodding, Shikamaru unhooked the scroll from its place. With a little bow of its eyestalks, the slug was gone.

"I can't believe she's using slugs like carrier pigeons," grumbled Ino as she eyed the small trail of slime on top of the table. But then there was another poof of smoke. Another slug appeared, this time with red stripes on its back. Despite its tiny size, Sasuke recognized this one.

"Tamiyo," said Sasuke, taking a step toward it.

"Futa forgot this file. Sakura-san sent me too," explained the creature. It wiggled its eyestalks. According to Sakura, that meant that they were excited. When he arched his eyebrow at the slug, Tamiyo seemed to smile (if it was possible for a slug to smile).

"And Sakura-san wants to know if you want to get dinner. She's having the interns have their first overnight shift with Takumi on duty so she's taking the night off," the slug proudly informed him.

"Is it appropriate to be mixing business and dinner plans like this?" responded Sasuke. The slug suddenly disappeared in a little poof of smoke.

"Kind of cold, Uchiha. If Haruno asked me out to dinner I'd go in a heartbeat," one of his coworkers commented.

"Like Haruno would ever ask you," another coworker retorted, eliciting a chorus of chuckles. Tamiyo suddenly popped into existence again.

"She says not to be rude and to get tempura with her," the slug reported.

A roar of laughter rose from the others while Sasuke let out a sigh.

"Just go, Uchiha. We'll cover this," Shikamaru said with a distracted wave of his hand. He snubbed his cigarette out on top of the table. The collage of burnt circles on top of the wood betrayed just how many times this had happened in the past. Sasuke glanced down at the two big scrolls in the middle of the table. Decoding them would take a few hours at least and then extracting relevant information and organizing it would also take a couple hours.

Still, something about the short messages the slug had conveyed bothered him. It was unlikely that the summons would ever change the wording of her mistress' message. And if it were directed at him, he doubted Sakura would use such cheerful language.

Ever since Christmas, Sakura wasn't exactly chipper. Though she kept up a good front at work and around their friends, Sasuke could tell that her mind was a constant tangle of worry. It was obvious enough by the way that she showed up unannounced at his apartment with an armful of what looked like juice boxes. They were actually filled with sake. Sakura had stumbled upon them in the grocery store not long ago.

"They taste foul," she reported when she had ripped the first one open. She lifted it up to Sasuke and he smelled what was suspiciously like rubbing alcohol. Or maybe acetone.

Putting her feet up on the coffee table, she drank her way through all of them with a patient file or an encyclopedia open in her lap while Sasuke sat on the other end of the couch reading through his own materials for work.

Sakura fell asleep on his sofa quite often. And sometimes he fell asleep next to her. Something about the sounds of another person breathing and just being in the same room as him was soothing. Sakura was quiet when she read. The only real noise she made was the loud slurp her straw made when she reached the bottom of the box. But she didn't struggle with the straw like most people did. When this happened, she promptly ripped the box open and tipped what remained straight into her mouth.

"That might be the genuinely most unattractive thing you've ever done in front of me," commented Sasuke one night. Sakura was slumped over the right arm rest, already reaching for the next box from the stacked pyramid on the corner of the coffee table. Lips pulling into a half-smile, she glanced his way. The plastic straw wrapper crinkled under her nails.

"I did die in front of you once," she offered.

"This is worse," he countered.

Rolling her eyes, Sakura ripped open the top flap of the box to deposit her straw. She wrapped her lips around the straw to take a sip, cringing at the strong fumes that hit her nose.

"Don't lie. You think I'm adorable. That's the only reason you keep me around," said Sakura with a fake flip of her hair. To make a point, she lifted her feet and dropped them straight in his lap. She wriggled her toes. Letting out a sigh, Sasuke pushed her feet off.

"I still think you drink too much," Sasuke told her flat-out. Sakura didn't blink.

"I think so too. But I'm rarely drunk," she promptly countered.

Shaking his head, Sasuke returned back to reality. Since Christmas, Sakura had taken a break from rounds at the hospital. To be precise, she had been bullied by her apprentice into not working. She still taught the medical students but she left the hospital duties to others. She was itching to get back to work. That much was obvious. And she was unhappy. That was blatantly apparent to Sasuke.

Sasuke glanced back at the clock on the wall.

Plus, it was nearly 6 and he was getting hungry.

"I'll be at the hospital in a few minutes," relented Sasuke. Tamiyo promptly disappeared, off to deliver the news.

"So these are the tenuous bonds of friendship. Once a beautiful woman calls, your friends can go to hell, huh?" one of his coworkers joked. Sasuke smirked.

"Sakura's certainly easier on the eyes than you are," Sasuke remarked. There was a moment of stunned silence before everyone else burst into laughter. The scorned colleague smiled in a good-natured way. He slapped Sasuke on the shoulder.

"You're a good guy, Uchiha. Go have fun," he responded.

"Tell Sakura I'm back and I want to get lunch sometime," Ino said under the cover of all the noise. Sasuke shot her a look.

"Why don't you tell her yourself?"

"What better way to get to Sakura than through her boyfriend?" Ino answered as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Sasuke fixed her with a flat stare.

"I'm not her boyfriend," he stated.

"Well, then what are you?" Ino quickly replied with an impish smile. Leaving him with that thought, Ino pushed him in the direction of the hallway. Shoving his hands in his pockets, Sasuke scoffed and walked off.

"Boyfriend," he muttered under his breath. After a moment, his expression lightened.

"Boyfriend," he repeated.

When Sasuke arrived at the hospital, there was such a fierce glower on his face that Sakura stopped in the middle of her conversation. The nurse she had been talking to was confused until she noticed Sasuke walking through the lobby. Letting out a little giggle, she quietly excused herself and found something to busy herself.

"Are you okay? You didn't have to come if you were dreading it so much. You look like you're about to kill someone," Sakura laughed as he stopped in front of her. As if her voice was some sort of trigger, Sasuke's face relaxed a bit. Not saying anything, he held out a bag for her. Eyebrows rising, Sakura peered into the bag.

"Is that...fish?" she asked.

"Ino's back from her honeymoon and asked me to give you this. It's trout sushi," Sasuke answered. She let out a sigh.

"She literally buys the weirdest stuff. Oh well, I bet it tastes good if Chouji picked it out with her," she grumbled. Lips puckering, she looked up at Sasuke.

"Come with me for a second," she suddenly said. She turned and strode down the hall. The smart click of her heels against the linoleum echoed.

"So I didn't really want to get dinner. I mean, we can get dinner later but there's another reason I sent Tamiyo," she said in a low voice as they headed toward the elevator. Sasuke pushed the upwards arrow and then leaned against the wall.

"That's obvious," he retorted with a quiet snort. Hands in his pockets, he had easily matched her brisk pace that made it seem like he wasn't rushing at all. Sneaking a peak over at him, she caught his haughty smirk.

"It's only obvious to you," she answered with a smile that made her cheeks hurt a little. It was like her face was smiling without her permission. But at the searching look in Sasuke's gaze, her smile quickly dropped. She hurriedly looked away, suddenly finding the need to check the time. She was saved when the elevator door opened with a ding. Quickly slipping inside, she stabbed her finger into the button. Sasuke followed at a more leisurely pace. He walked inside, leaning in the opposite corner from her to stare at her.

"So what's this mysterious thing you called me for?" Sasuke questioned as the elevator began to rise. That didn't seem to diffuse any of the tension. If anything, Sakura's shoulders tensed further. Her lips mashed together as she carefully glanced his way.

"We've been running tests. Well, they've been running tests on me. And Takumi told me he got some results today," she said, pointedly avoiding his gaze. Sasuke watched her closely. And then his eyes narrowed.

"And you're too scared to find out on your own," he surmised. Her face promptly turned bright red.

"What? No! I just... since you're really the only other person involved in this besides the staff, I thought..." Sakura's voice rose and fell in a dramatic wave. She trailed off, swallowing thickly. Pointedly avoiding the smug look on Sasuke's face, she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Okay, so what if I am? There's nothing wrong with that," she grumbled.

"Nothing," he told her. And though her arms didn't uncross, she smiled a little.

By the time they reached the right floor, the air between was back to the easy familiarity she was used to. When the doors slid open, Sakura bumped into Sasuke with her shoulder on the way out.

Takumi was standing at the upstairs nurse's station. With such a big hospital, it was impossible not to have multiple stations for the nurses. He looked up at their approach. When he saw Sakura, his eyes lit up. And then he saw Sasuke and his face crinkled with consideration.

"What's wrong?" asked Sakura when she stopped in front of him.

Takumi pointed at her and then at Sasuke and then blinked a few times.

"Sorry. It's nothing, Sensei. It's just... I haven't seen such a clear case of mirroring in a long time," her apprentice admitted. The way his gaze flitted between the two of them again keyed her on to what he was talking about. Fighting the urge to blush, she quickly seized Takumi by the shoulders to steer him off to somewhere more private. They ended up in an empty patient's room in the western wing of the hospital.

Takumi tossed the file he had been holding on the freshly-made bed. He began sorting through transparent scans and putting them on the x-ray view box hanging on the wall. Sakura glanced around the room before she settled on leaning against the edge of the bed. Sasuke stood in between her and Takumi, eyebrows knitting together as he squinted at the images.

"Your blood work came back normal until Sasaki-san decided to take a look at your hormone levels," began Takumi, handing a sheet to Sakura. She scanned through it while she listened to Takumi speaking.

"Your estrogen levels are through the roof, Sensei," Takumi said.

"Yeah. Um, Nozomi wrote a note here on the results. '_It's like someone turned up the dial all the way and now there is literally 90% estrogen and 10% blood in her body_.' Well..." Sakura read out loud, trying her best not to laugh.

"That would explain the moodiness and the general... less than chipper demeanor," he carefully added. Sakura sighed. She knew that her crabbiness hadn't been completely hidden. And it was just like her apprentice to pick up on her feelings so quickly. She nodded, handing the lab results back to him. All the work seemed to check out. And since this was Nozomi, she would have undoubtedly triple-checked her work.

"So, I got worried and we ordered that ultrasound done last week," Takumi went on. Sakura nodded again.

"And it was only afterwards that I realized that the technician didn't know why we were running tests. So she said in her report that everyone seemed to check out fine. And it took me forever to realize that that was wrong. There **should** be something strange. That was when we had the MRI done," Takumi rattled off, on a roll now.

Sakura resisted the strong impulse to interrupt him. She wished she had been included in this process. It would have made things much less nerve-wracking for her.

"And look!" exclaimed Takumi. He smacked his hand down on the black and white scans. Sakura leaned in closer to see exactly what he was so excited about. Her mouth pulled down in a frown as she stared.

"You've gotten these mixed up. These aren't mine," she pointed out. Because right under his finger, in the scans of the abdomen, Sakura saw what had been circled.

It was a perfect set of ovaries, fallopian tubes, and uterus. Sakura took a moment to marvel at the soft curves of the organs. While she didn't hold a macabre love for guts, she did often appreciate the symmetry of the human body. A woman's reproductive system, in particular, was always beautiful, she had always secretly believed. There was poetry in the way that fallopian tubes stretched out like arms and hands reaching for precious cargo. And then the way that the womb seemed designed to gently cradle new life had always seemed wonderful too.

Breathing a sad noise of disappointment, Sakura ripped her eyes away from the scans. But then, she saw a twisted blotch that she thought she recognized. She sucked in a sharp breath as she took a step forward.

"I know that scar," she whispered. Her fingers rose to touch the smudge. Her other hand rose to rest lightly on her abdomen. She had memorized where her scar was. On her stomach, it lay a slightly lighter color, still a little puckered. And there would be a matching one on her back- an exit wound.

"No way," Sakura said. She grabbed the file off the bed and began scouring through whatever else was left in it. Silent words were mouthed as she impatiently skimmed through notes and typed up answers to all the questions that had been posed. Tears began dripping down her cheeks even though she wasn't really crying. When she flipped to the last page, she dropped the entire folder, sending papers scattering about.

"Oh shit! I'm so sorry. Those were in order," she exclaimed, already kneeling on the floor to retrieve the pieces. But Sasuke was kneeling beside her, his hand on her arm, stopping her from channeling all that nervous energy into everything but what she wanted to admit out loud.

"What is it?" he asked.

She met his eyes, those soft brown eyes that always seemed to find her. All at once, she wanted to throw herself onto the floor and crawl under that hospital bed and run out into the streets screaming. Hands now shaking, she shuffled slowly through the charts and papers until she found the photographs. On top was a sticky note with the words _Examination of the uterus_ in Kei's neat print. Sakura recognized it from the way the characters slanted ever-so-slightly to the left. After an extra minute of searching, Sakura found the notes to go along with them. She flipped past the cover page with nervous hands.

"Careful examination of the expelled organ reveals an incision precisely three inches across . The cauterization around the sides suggests that it is of a surgical nature. But upon further inspection, similar cuts on the surrounding connective tissue show that any kind of procedure has not been performed by a doctor. I believe that this is an effect of the Divine Palm technique that the patient is known to have used on more than one occasion. The burning around the edges of the incision is a well-known effect of direct contact with highly-concentrated chakra. The increased volume of blood vessels and tissues in the endometrium along with the open wound inside suggests that it was in the immediate stages postpartum. The presence of certain enzymes (listed in the attached chart) suggests autolysis and involution. These pieces of evidence, along with the larger than average size of the organ lead me to conclude that this is a uterus shortly after giving birth," she read out loud.

She let the report and photos fall on the pile.

"Blood tests?" she asked in a tired voice.

"O negative, Sensei. We had the DNA sequenced too. It's a match for yours," he answered solemnly.

"I see," Sakura finally said. It was completely silent in that room for the longest time. Sasuke stopped crouching and instead sat cross-legged in front of her. Takumi stared down at them for a bit before he sat too, not caring that he was probably crushing something important.

Sasuke's hand was still on her arm, only now it looked more like it was trying to hold her down the planet. Sakura stared unseeingly at it for a while before she slowly slid out of his grasp. She slowly folded her hands in her lap as she tried to gather words.

"So I'm not going insane?" she finally uttered.

"Probably not, Sensei," Takumi answered.

"My six-month-old cold?" she queried.

"Compromised immune system."

"The exhaustion."

"Probably from your body trying to balance generating a new organ and dealing with your work. I think that if you hadn't been using up all your chakra at the hospital, this would have been over with in maybe a couple weeks," Takumi told her.

"Those terrible mood swings?" she groaned, already knowing the answer.

"Hormonal changes," Takumi said with visible relief.

"Oh my- wow. Even the insomnia and the awful dreams make sense. It's... what the hell kind of doctor am I?" Sakura sighed as she sat back on her heels. Raising her hands up, she pressed her palms to her closed eyes.

"Well, to be fair, Sensei. This has literally never happened in the history of recorded medicine before," Takumi cut in. An incredulous laugh bubbled out of Sakura. Her hands flopped back down to her sides.

"So I'm... I'm fine," she stated.

"Yup," Takumi agreed.

Fresh tears welled to the surface. Sakura reached out to grasp both of Sasuke's hands. She squeezed tightly until he squeezed back. Staring him directly in the eyes, she broke into a genuine smile bursting with excitement.

"I'm fine," she said again.

She wasn't surprised when Sasuke leaned forward to press his forehead to hers.

"Yeah," responded Sasuke in a low voice.

It was only then that Takumi burst into tears. He threw himself at his teacher, unable to keep up his composure any longer. This, of course, tore Sakura and Sasuke apart. Bewildered, Sakura did her best to console Takumi even while she laughed. The irritation radiating off of Sasuke was clear from the way he shot dirty looks at the boy. But that only made Sakura laugh harder until her stomach began to hurt.

"There you are! I've been looking for you everywhere, Haru-Haru-sensei! Did Taku-chan tell you the news yet?" Nozomi shouted as she suddenly burst into the room. She froze at the very odd scene she was witnessing. Her wide-eyed gaze roved slowly over the scattered papers littering the floor to the three people sitting on top of them. The fat tears rolling down Takumi's cheeks, the crying laughter of Sakura, and the weary glower of Sasuke all culminated into a somehow simultaneously confusing and perfectly logical scenario.

"Aw, you always start all the fun without me," Nozomi finally commented.

* * *

><p>Sometime around the end of January, Uzumaki Naruto woke up in the Hokage's office one morning and remembered that he had once had a life outside his office. Checking to see that no one was awake to catch him, he rubbed the newsprint off his cheek and shed his official robes. After some thought, he cobbled together a quick dummy from various things around the room and deposited it all in his chair. He spun it to face the window before carefully perching his hat on top of it. From the door, it looked like the esteemed Hokage was staring on the window, deep in thought as he looked over his beloved village. Snickering to himself, Naruto bolted across the rooftops, fully intending to bully Sakura into making him breakfast.<p>

But when he felt out toward her house, he realized that it was completely empty. Eyebrows wiggling mischievously, he took a sharp turn and instead went to Sasuke's place. As he approached, he could feel Sakura, peacefully slumbering inside, while Sasuke's own chakra roused briefly from sleep to greet him. Out of everyone, only Sasuke had refused to hand over the key to his apartment.

"I'd like to keep it a moron-free zone if you don't mind," he had retorted.

"That's Moron-**sama** to you- wait. No. That's not right," Naruto had replied.

So now, Naruto stood at the front door, rapping his knuckles against it until his sharp ears heard the ungraceful thump of a body rolling out of bed. When the door slowly creaked open, he promptly stuck his grinning face in the crack.

"Yo, Sleeping Beauty! You have any food?" Naruto cheerfully crowed.

Eyes barely opened, Sasuke turned around and stalked off, leaving the door open for Naruto to enter. This was somewhat surprising since Naruto had fully expected to have the door slammed shut on his face instead. Quickly checking for traps, Naruto walked inside, pushing the door closed behind him.

His eyes immediately zoned in on the pile of juice boxes on the coffee table. But from the bright red kanji on the label, he knew that they were actually boxes of almost-toxic sake. There was a packet of playing cards stacked haphazardly next to the small mountain of finished alcohol. A blanket was tangled up on one of the sofa. Humming, Naruto went to the fridge to find something to drink. He crowed with triumph upon finding a carton of milk with just a little bit left at the button. Drinking straight from the carton always seemed to make it test better. Sasuke shuffled out of the bedroom, still squinting against the new day.

"You have any ramen? Where's Sakura-chan?" Naruto asked all at once as he watched Sasuke stop in the middle of the apartment to stretch his arms.

"She's still sleeping," Sasuke muttered in a scratchy voice. He pushed Naruto out of the way to open up the refrigerator. After a second, he turned to glower at the carton held in Naruto's hand.

"There wasn't much left anyway. So tell me, why did Sakura-chan stay the night?" Naruto interrogated with a suddenly wicked smile. Sasuke's eyes opened up slightly wider. He knocked his fist into the side of Naruto's head before going back in the fridge to pull out leftovers.

"We drank a little last night. She didn't want to walk back home so she decided to stay here. What kind of stupid thoughts have you got going in that moron head of yours?" growled Sasuke.

"First of all, I'm not a moron, I'm the Hokage," Naruto huffed. Sasuke scoffed audibly.

"Those aren't mutually exclusive. You can be a moron Hokage," Sasuke snarked. Naruto shot him a look.

"Rude. Secondly, if my beautiful friend is staying the night at some hooligan's house, I think I have a right to know. And thirdly, if you have any ramen, you have to give it up because," Naruto paused to point both thumbs at himself, "Devastatingly handsome Hokage, here."

"Naruto, I swear, if it's before 9, I will gut you," a voice suddenly snarled. Nearly jumping, Naruto turned toward the sound.

What had previously appeared to be a lump of blanket on the sofa suddenly rose to reveal a highly-disgruntled Sakura. Raking both her hands through her hair, she let out a sleepy groan.

"Sasuke! You let Sakura-chan sleep on the couch!" Naruto scolded him.

"I don't want to hear that from the idiot who barges into people's houses in the morning trying to eat ramen for breakfast," Sakura flung back in an equally badgering voice. She rubbed at her face before she turned toward the clock hanging above he television.

It was 9:01. Naruto was spared.

Naruto put on a pot of coffee while Sakura went to go take a shower. Sasuke picked through the fridge until he found enough side dishes to heat up with rice. He dug up an old package of cup ramen from his cabinets and flung it at the jubilant blond.

By the time Sakura was clean and mostly awake, breakfast was on the table. She was dressed in her clothes from the previous night, wet hair twisted up in a tight bun on top of her head. She poured herself a cup of coffee and drank it while it was still hot, almost scalding her tongue.

"Uchiha Sasuke, you are literally the only person I know that has miso soup with coffee in the morning," she remarked as she sat down at the kitchen table. Naruto chortled as he snapped his chopsticks together. His ramen still had a minute to go and he couldn't wait to dig in. Sasuke arched an eyebrow at her.

"Then starve," he simply replied before picking up his own chopsticks.

"Cruel!" Naruto exclaimed.

"A terrible bully!" Sakura added in the same overdramatic voice.

Exchanging grins of conspiracy, Sakura and Naruto bumped fists.

As the other two began digging in, Naruto peeled back the lid on his ramen. He inhaled the fumes of happiness before slurping up a big mouthful of noodles.

"So, it's Saturday," he said through his food.

"It is," Sakura answered, torn between amusement and horror at the reminder of her best friend's awful table manners.

"What're you guys doing today?" Naruto demanded.

Sakura and Sasuke shared a thoughtful look. Sakura shrugged as she went to grab a slice of seasoned tofu.

"I don't know. I need to do some chores, run some errands. Why?" she said before she popped the tofu in her mouth.

"I'm playing hooky. We should all play hooky together," Naruto proposed. The old glint of the prankster returned to his sparkling blue eyes. But Sasuke quickly deflated that growing excitement.

"We can't be playing hooky. Today's Saturday, like you said. Neither of us are working," Sasuke pointed out.

"Well I'm playing hooky, then. And I'll make you accomplices," Naruto stubbornly proposed.

"What do you propose, Hokage-sama?" Sakura asked while calmly continuing her meal. Naruto's wide smile returned.

"Uh... Well..." he slowly trailed off. Sakura and Sasuke looked up at his silence.

"I have no idea. I haven't had time off in... forever," Naruto admitted.

Sakura and Sasuke looked at each other again.

"Training, lunch, training, cheesy horror movies and sake," Sakura promptly proposed.

"Cheesy horror movies, ramen, and sake," Naruto amended.

"Deal," Sakura immediately said. She reached out to shake Naruto's hand.

Sasuke stared at the both of them.

"You just dragged me into this," he guessed.

"Of course."

"Yeah."

Naruto and Sakura answered at the same time.

Shooting them a glare, Sasuke resumed his meal. But Naruto and Sakura snickered together like two little kids.

"Don't be so grumpy. You love us," chortled Naruto.

"I'd love to murder you both," Sasuke said under his breath.

But when he looked back up at them, Sakura was so completely sure that it was happiness she saw in Sasuke's eyes. And she was just as equally certain that that was what was reflected in her eyes too.


	15. Jasmine

It has snowed so much in the past couple weeks that I am really considering moving to Hawaii or something. The one good thing about the snow is that it destroyed all my plans and cancelled half my classes so now I have some decent time to get some writing done.

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 15: Jasmine

"Jan-ken-pon!"

"Argh! I lost again!" cried Takumi as he held up his fist.

Nozomi and Kei looked at each other before they slapped high-fives. Bot of them had chosen paper, of course, as they always did. Grinning heartlessly, Nozomi waved her finger in front of Takumi's nose.

"You lost. You're buying. Go get me a melon soda!" she ordered, hands on her hips.

"Black tea for me," chimed in Kei.

Complaining quietly, Takumi stormed off to the vending machine at the end of the hall. As he stalked away, Sakura left her office to see what all the noise was about. At the click of her heels, heads turned toward her. The openness in her expression brought an audible sigh of relief.

The hospital staff were still recovering from the recent prickliness their Chief of Medicine had been experiencing. For several months she had been prone to snapping and lecturing, leaving people wary of her. Once, she had caught an orderly and an intern making out in the supply closet instead of working. Her furious verbal lashing had struck terror into the hearts of many. Both of them were suspended for a week after the incident. And ever since they returned, they had scurried around with shifty eyes at the sound of her heels.

But now, it seemed that everything had returned to normal. Sakura's levels of righteous rage had returned to normal and the only person she seemed willing to verbally abuse were the particularly lazy interns and, on the odd occasion when he had time to visit, the Hokage when he tried to steal lollipops from pediatrics.

"What're you slacking off for?" Sakura asked, lightly knocking her fist into Nozomi's temple. The girl flashed a mischievous smile while Kei waved before going back to her book. Even when slacking, Kei was somehow partially on task.

"We did janken to see who would go get drinks, Sensei," Nozomi proudly answered.

"It can't be helped, Sensei. Now that the war's over and we're done cleaning up, it's so calm in comparison," added Kei as she flipped to a new page. Folding her arms over her chest, Sakura hummed noncommittally.

"The interns?" she asked.

"I gave them busy-work: bedpans, sponge baths. I caught more making out in a closet, by the way," Kei reported without looking up.

"Research is quiet. We're still waiting for our cultures to grow. And I've organized catalogues twice this week," Nozomi chimed in her own report. Her tone was less clinical and more of a childish whine. In response, Sakura ruffled Nozomi's hair, sending the thick waves flopping into her face. Sakura hoisted herself up to sit on the counter next to Nozomi. After some thought, she toed her shoes off and let them flop to the floor. A sigh of relief left Sakura as her toes finally stopped being pinched together.

"I was stuck in a meeting all morning. The new council wanted to get me to cut back on hospital spending," Sakura suddenly huffed. She flexed her toes and then rolled her ankles a few times to get the blood circulating. At this, Kei flipped to a new page.

"I thought you were going to propose that anyway, Sensei," she commented.

"I was. But when they start nagging me about irresponsibility and lack of foresight, it makes me want to order a thousand new syringes for no reason," huffed Sakura. She crossed one leg over the other with a scowl.

"So?" prompted Nozomi with eagerness coloring her voice. She leaned on her forearms to peer up at Sakura.

"I only reduced our budget by 2/3 of what I had originally planned. It was more than enough to make them shut up," sniffed Sakura.

"You're terrible, Sensei!" Nozomi giggled.

"And with the extra money?" It was Kei who spoke this time. Her shrewd gaze flitted up from her reading for the briefest instant.

"Give everyone in the hospital a slight pay bump. And then I'll use what's left to fund the hospital's charity programs," replied Sakura without hesitation. Giving a sly grin, Sakura leaned back on her palms.

"A demon."

The three women looked up to find Takumi standing before them with clear horror written across his face. Hugged to his chest were three cans of beverages.

"Sometimes it's my job to be a people-pleaser. And sometimes it's my job to be a jerk," she happily said. She held out her hands. Nozomi slapped one while Kei slapped the other.

"Women are... terrifying," whispered Takumi. Shaking his head, he tossed the two drinks and then looked down at his own can of green tea.

"Takumi," Sakura called. Takumi's head rose.

"Why don't we have a spar?" she suggested.

Eyebrows arched. Nozomi's hand immediately shot up in the air.

"I want to watch!" she exclaimed.

Half an hour later, Sakura was standing in the old training grounds Team 7 had always used. There were still patches of disturbed earth from her spar with Sasuke and Naruto last week. She tightened the gloves around her wrists while flexing her fingers. The way the fabric stretched over her hands was comforting, almost like an old friend.

"I hope you're not too out of shape," Sakura said when she spotted her apprentice entering the clearing. His grimace was answer enough.

"It's alright. I've gone soft too," she assured him. And the instant his shoulders began to relax, Sakura pounced. Muscles tensed, she brought her fist down. Takumi blocked it with his own chakra-fueled arm. He stood strong, legs apart and hands clenched tightly. Without giving him time to recover, Sakura hooked her foot around his leg, sweeping his leg out from under him.

"Focus!" she shouted as he crashed onto his back. The clone immediately disappeared in a puff of smoke. A fist came in from her left side. Sakura ducked, elbow swinging. Takumi dodged in a graceful backflip that made her smile with pride. But then he was running toward her already, hand charged up with chakra. He smashed his open palm into the ground, shattering the frozen earth. Before the ripple could hit her, Sakura stomped her foot, sending fresh fissures through the dirt and grass. The two waves collided before Sakura's more powerful force split through the other. Takumi jumped to avoid being toppled.

"When dealing with brute force, Takumi," Sakura said. Takumi landed several yards away, wary but still listening.

"Sometimes being the better brute is the answer," Sakura concluded before she jumped, raising both her hands above her head. As she hit the ground, she smashed her fists into the earth, sending a spike of dirt shooting up toward Takumi.

"SENSEI, YOU'RE A DEMON!" Takumi shouted as he began dodging her barrage of attacks. Smiling widely, Sakura continued to bash the ground until spikes of rock and dirt were rising and falling in a chaotic minefield.

"Flattery is always the way to a woman's heart, Takumi," she laughed in response.

"He got a solid hit in!" Sakura proudly announced when they were back at the hospital hours later. Nozomi and Kei crowded close to her to admire the bruise on her left cheek. It was a nice purple color in the center with yellow lightening at the edges. While Nozomi ooh-ed and aah-ed over it, a sudden chill fell across them.

"Hey, Kei-chan, why do I suddenly feel like the god of death has arrived?" Nozomi asked with a stiff expression. Kei matched her with an equally uncomfortable look.

"Probably because that person's here again," Kei answered. Sakura rolled her eyes at them.

The two slowly turned to see Uchiha Sasuke walking down the hallway. His eyes were red as they scanned over Sakura leaning against the nurse's station's counter and then Takumi standing next to her. When Sakura tilted her head toward his approach, the red vanished from his gaze.

"What? No flowers?" teased Sakura when he stopped in front of her. She crossed her arms over chest. Sasuke raised an eyebrow and then reached out to press his thumb squarely in the middle of her impressive bruise.

"OW!" Sakura complained. She swatted at him and he easily blocked the half-hearted blow with his wrist.

"Why do you look like you went to find Tora?" he asked. Sakura cringed as she remembered that particular mission. When they were Genin, they had been tasked with finding Tora, the cat who always seemed to run away from its owner. Sakura always commented that if her owner wore that much perfume and squeezed her that hard, she would run away too. Naruto and Sasuke agreed, something that almost never happened back then.

"I sparred with Takumi and he gave me this. Isn't it great?" Sakura explained. When Sasuke's gaze slid to Takumi, the younger man flinched. He suddenly busied himself healing the bruises on his knuckles. Unlike Sakura, whose hands were completely unscathed, Takumi didn't yet have the chakra control to be able to protect himself so well. In fact, even Sakura's manicure was completely untouched. Sasuke observed this as he took her left hand in his and examined it carefully. With her free hand, she reached up and quickly erased her bruise. It was almost like magic. A slow swipe of her fingers across the blotch made it vanish completely.

"I was dropping off files at the Hokage's archive. Apparently, after Naruto played hooky last week, Kakashi's practically got him chained to his desk," Sasuke remarked while still carefully observing her knuckles. Sakura shrugged guiltlessly, leaning against the counter.

"I wasn't aware that bondage was one of his kinks," she answered. The look Sakura gave her managed to convey disgust and amusement all at once. He slowly lowered her hand.

"When I talked to Naruto, he wanted me to ask you if you had any photos of him from when we were kids? Apparently they want to do some sort of picture slideshow at the wedding," Sasuke went on. Sakura's lower lip jutted out as she thought. It had been years since she had packed away a majority of the keepsakes she had from when her past. If she remembered correctly, there were stored in a box in the attic, buried under other things like old clothes.

"Um... I'll need a solid weekend to get all my pictures out and go through them," she answered while trying to plan a set of days to do exactly so.

"Kei-chan, did you hear? He made up a weird excuse to come visit Sensei," Nozomi whispered in a voice that was too loud.

"What are you trying to suggest, Nozomi-chan?" Kei whispered back with a straight face.

"That he must be constipated," answered Nozomi.

"Wrong," Kei said without missing a beat.

"Are you two performing a comedy sketch in the hospital?" Sakura demanded, fixing her students with a strange look. But then she paused. Glancing at Sasuke, she thought for a moment.

"Which one would be the idiot and which would be the straight man?" she asked out loud.

"The both of them are idiots. They take after you," Sasuke promptly replied. Stifling a laugh, Sakura shoved him while Nozomi and Kei glared quietly at him.

"Anyway, photos- I'll keep that in mind," promised Sakura as she hid her giggles behind her hand.

"You want to eat? I'm getting dinner with Nara and some of the guys from work," Sasuke offered, cocking his head toward the exit.

"No can do. I've got a torn ACL to deal with in," Sakura paused to look up at the clock, "40 minutes. Another time, okay?" She stole a glance at the clock again and sighed. While the other departments were relaxing a little, Sakura found herself easily occupied with teaching and running the hospital. Without Shizune, that was twice as many medical students to train.

Sakura half-considered pushing the surgery off to Kei and holing herself up at Sai's house to drink beer with him. Instead, Sasuke grabbed her nose and squeezed it once before walking off- as if he could read her thoughts. Nozomi eyed Sasuke's retreating slouch with a wicked sparkle in her eyes. Leaning in over Kei's lap, Nozomi poked Sakura in the arm.

"Dumped for a lousy ACL. Poor Uchiha-san," drawled Nozomi.

Sakura flicked Nozomi's forehead.

"Just for that, you can assist me during this next surgery," said Sakura.

Nozomi's lower lip jutted out in a pout. Still, she obediently followed along as Sakura began striding down the hall toward the operating room.

"I still hate guts and stuff. I might vomit, Sensei," Nozomi warned her. Sakura cast a backwards glance at her.

"Why do you think we wear the masks?" she answered.

"EW!" Nozomi laughed, hooking her arm through the other woman's arm.

* * *

><p>About a week later, when Sasuke walked into Sakura's house, he very nearly stepped on her sprawled across her foyer. One of her slugs had popped up in his office, delivering a waterproof envelope filled with the photos that Naruto and Hinata had asked for. When he asked why Sakura didn't give them to him in person, the slug managed to look guilty. Though it didn't reveal anything outright, it eyed Sasuke pointedly.<p>

"That's a question to ask Sakura-san herself," it had told him before exploding in a poof of smoke.

So here Sasuke was, standing over what very nearly looked like Sakura's corpse splayed diagonally with her shoes sloppily kicked off to the side.

"Hi," she said into the floor.

Satisfied that she wasn't dead, he took off his sandals and then crouched beside her.

"...What are you doing?" he demanded.

"I got back from work. And I gave up... on everything," she calmly responded without lifting her head. Sasuke stared at her. When it seemed like she wasn't going to elaborate, he poked her in the side.

"Do you think you could carry me to the bathroom?" she requested. Sasuke frowned. She didn't sound particularly urgent but it was an oddly specific thing to ask.

"Why? Do you have a stomachache?"

"No. If I stand. It's going to come out. And I like this dress," she answered.

"What's going to come out?" Sasuke asked with some trepidation. He had seen Sakura pulling some strange medical jutsu one too many times to feel comfortable not knowing what was going to happen.

"Blood," Sakura snapped as she finally raised her head. There was a long pause as the word processed.

"Oh... _Oh_," remarked Sasuke after he realized just what she meant.

Several minutes later, Sakura lay facedown on her bed. Sandwiched between her mattress and her stomach was a heating pad that had been warmed in the microwave. She let out a sigh of relief when Sasuke walked in with the second heating pad to lay it across her back. The heat steeped deep into her muscles to soothe the worst of the pain.

"My hero," she mumbled into her pillow.

"I'll make tea," said Sasuke as he walked out again.

"You are a shining beacon of hope in my life, Uchiha Sasuke," she called after him.

"If I'm a shining beacon, you must've had a rough day," Sasuke said, appearing in the doorway with a box held in each hand. She turned her face to the side to look over the boxes. After some thought, she pointed to the package of chamomile tea on the left. He disappeared again.

"I was in pediatrics talking to someone and one of the kids came up and puked on my shoes," she admitted. She thought she heard Sasuke snort from the kitchen. But she didn't really care. Now that she was on a roll, her building irritations began spilling out.

"I ran into Hyuuga Neji at the hospital today too- which was still all sorts of awkward. Ugh, and when I went to buy flowers, Ino's mother wouldn't stop gushing to me about how wonderful it was to have a son-in-law. And then she goes on to grill me about when I'm getting married," Sakura complained, propping her face up on the backs of her hands. She heard the tea kettle begin to whine.

"Do you want to get married?" she heard him ask.

"What?" she squawked in a startled voice. She awkwardly twisted around to see him standing in the doorway with one hand on his hip and a steaming mug held in the other hand. Her reaction seemed to confuse him until information processed through his brain.

"I mean do you ever have plans to get married in the future? I'm not asking you to marry me," he sighed. Suddenly feeling flustered, Sakura aimed and flung her slipper off her foot and into Sasuke's general direction. There was a flat slap that told her the shoe had hit the wall instead.

"Maybe? I don't know. I haven't thought about all that for a long time. I've been sort of preoccupied with stuff... like a war," Sakura admitted. At this, Sasuke entered the bedroom and sat down on the bed next to her. He set the cup of tea on the nightstand but she didn't thank him.

"Get out of my room," she promptly ordered.

"What?"

"No jerks."

"You just called me your hero," Sasuke reminded her.

"My jerk hero. Still not allowed. Just let me die," sighed Sakura.

"Alright, Your Highness. I have to go explain to Naruto why you're not getting dinner. He's going to whine forever," Sasuke declared, getting to his feet. Sakura grimaced.

"Thanks, I owe you one," she answered as she rolled onto her back to look up at him. There was a strange expression on Sasuke's face.

"No you don't," Sasuke simply said before he left.

Sakura lay puzzling over his words for a long time. She sat up to take a sip of the tea he had left her and let out a startled noise. He had put a drizzle of honey in it. When she licked her lips, the sweetness lingered there.

* * *

><p>Winter started retreating sometime in the beginning of February. This wasn't so unusual in Konoha. It was coldest in January before it started to slowly warm again. There were years where winter lasted longer or was maybe harsher than usual. But this year had been average and so everyone was relieved when the frigid winds stopped blasting at last.<p>

But Haruno Sakura didn't really bother to celebrate. What drove her to the bar one night in the beginning of February, was a celebration of another kind.

"To the smartest, cruelest, and most beautiful Chief of Medicine," the head of pathology said, holding up his bottle. Sakura rolled her eyes but smiled at his words.

"CHEERS!" everyone else agreed as they clinked their drinks together. Sakura was immediately pulled into a group of people as she took a sip of whiskey. She had turned the weaker beer down and substituted it for something a touch stronger.

"So what're we doing next, Haruno-sensei?" someone asked.

"Now that the trials have been successful, we'll probably run a couple more just to be sure of our findings. But in the meantime we'll bring the Hokage up to date on it. It's up to him and the council to decide what to do from here on out," Sakura replied. She briefly noticed Nozomi walking past while engrossed in conversation with a handsome young man. Their eyes met and Sakura gave her a wink. Nozomi had always been popular with the boys.

"Well, congratulations. It's all thanks to your hard work that we managed to accomplish something so great," another person chimed in.

Sakura desperately wished that she cared about this conversation. But at the moment, all she could think of was how much she would rather be at home in her pajamas than out at this bar. Still, her position meant that she had to smile and nod graciously, laughing at the flattery.

This was her old haunt, the place where the bartender recognized her and never said a judging word about her lack of company. But something about the dim lighting and the pervasive smell of smoke in the air wasn't so appealing that night. And then there were the men. If she had to rebuff the advances of one more cocky doctor with an ego bigger than his ability level, she was going to throw herself through the wall to escape.

Sakura's silent cry for help was answered about an hour later when the door opened, leaking cold air indoors. She was at the bar knocking back another whiskey when she felt Sasuke's chakra a second later than she should have. When she turned, she saw him walking over to her with a decidedly menacing air. The man who had had been trying to sweet talk her for the past half hour suddenly disappeared. Sakura sagged against the bar, grateful but also annoyed.

"What're you doing here?" she asked with obvious grumpiness.

"Nara and some of the guys wanted to get a drink. What about you?" answered Sasuke. He sat next to her, signaling to the bartender for a glass of his own. He caught the glass and helped himself to the bottle of whiskey set in front of her.

"We've made some good progress in research. And I think that it was really Nozomi and Kei trying to get me out of the hospital for once," Sakura sighed.

"Haruno! Long time no see!" a boisterous voice interrupted. Already smiling, Sakura slowly turned around to face Isami Shigehito. He hugged her just tightly enough for Sasuke's glower to resurface.

"Isa-senpai! You're not in Intelligence," said Sakura as she pushed him off her.

"I'm not. I ran into these guys on the street and decided to tag along. I saw cheerful little Uchiha's face and I just couldn't resist," joked Shigehito. But when he was met with Sasuke's stony stare, he quickly cleared his throat and focused his attentions back on Sakura.

"You're looking great, Haruno, by the way," Shigehito suddenly commented. Sasuke's eyes narrowed further.

"Save it for some doe-eyed girl, Senpai. I'm not in the mood," sighed Sakura. But Shigehito persisted.

"No, I mean it. There's something about you... you look different. Did you cut your hair?"

"**Not** in the mood," Sakura repeated in a sharp voice. The bartender's gaze zeroed in on them, his hand already reaching for the wooden bat he kept under the bar counter. But when Sasuke shook his head, the bartender resumed wiping glasses with a clean rag. An awkward silence ensued before Shigehito suddenly found someone across the room and quickly went to talk to them.

Sakura poured herself a generous glass.

"I thought you liked him," remarked Sasuke with smug approval as she sat spinning the drink between her fingers.

"I do," she answered.

"For the record, you do look nice."

This made Sakura turn in her seat to face him.

"Uchiha Sasuke, you are the only man in this room I completely trust not to hit on me," she said. But Sasuke looked guiltless.

"I'm not hitting on you. It's just true. Your hair is pink. Naruto's a moron. You look good," Sasuke calmly elaborated. Suddenly embarrassed, Sakura knocked against his arm. She took a sip of her drink to avoid talking. But the sudden heat in her cheeks quickly died down. It was comfortable with Sasuke. Now that he was there, planting himself like a creepy guy deterrent, she could drink in peace. And it was nice to have something there to clink glasses with her.

'I don't think I've ever seen you this miserable around alcohol before," Sasuke noted after a while. Sakura rolled her eyes.

"You have no idea. But it would be rude to skip out There's a big social obligation that comes with my job," she sighed.

"Why not just go home? You've already shown your face," suggested Sasuke. Sakura's lower lip jutted out in a pout.

"I'd get caught," she admitted. But then Sasuke pushed the whiskey closer to her.

"Get drunk. I'll take you home."

Sakura squinted at him and then at the bottle. She spun her glass one more time between her palms before she tossed the whole drink back in one gulp. It burned down her throat and into her stomach, sitting there like an angry knot of fire. When it dissipated, the warmth spread to her arms and legs. She began to regret wearing a sweater over her dress.

"Deal. But you have to carry me," said Sakura as she held out her glass to Sasuke. He refilled her glass with a sage expression.

"Deal."

Sakura spent the next half hour tossing back drinks. She was careful to consume enough water too. Though the next day was a Tuesday, the staff had somehow managed to convince each other that a night of drinking was a good idea. And Sakura didn't exactly plan on getting a killer hangover. Keeping hydrated was key to prevent the vomiting and nausea that came with hangovers.

Soon, Sakura was learning against the bar with her face cupped in her hands. Her palms felt nice and cool against her warm cheeks.

"Do I drink too much?" she asked. Concern wrinkled her forehead as she looked over at him.

"Yes," Sasuke promptly answered. He slowly nudged the glass away from her and she didn't stop him. Instead, she sagged against him with a tired sigh.

"I do," she agreed in a solemn way.

"But I won't stop drinking. It's too convenient. You won't hate me for that, right?" she went on with another quizzical look in Sasuke's direction. Letting out a sigh of his own, Sasuke got to his feet. He set down money on the bar for both of them before he turned to look at her. The bartender swiped the coins up in his hand, counted them, and then gave a gruff mutter of thanks.

"Alright, time for you to go home if you're saying stuff like that," Sasuke declared. He held out his hand to her. And she observed it carefully, lips pulling downward as she stared at his palm.

"You didn't answer my question," she said in a quiet voice.

Sasuke made an impatient noise in the back of his throat. Taking her wrist, he pulled her to her feet. She tottered a little on her heels but regained balance quickly. But she stood there, stubbornly staring up at him with her liquor eyes soft and watery.

"Sakura, I think you might have noticed that there aren't many people left alive that I still care about. Consider yourself one of them," Sasuke finally responded. Sakura pondered this for a moment before she nodded emphatically. She bumped her fist against his shoulder. It wasn't strong enough to hurt.

"I will," she proudly stated before she turned and began walking to the door. The bartender eyed Sakura's retreating back warily.

"Better go after her. I don't need her breaking anyone else's jaw if they try to hit on her. Bad for business," he grunted at Sasuke. With a curt nod, Sasuke did just that. But even the drunk men in the bar seemed to know better than to get in Sakura's way. Her gait was surprisingly steady as she made her way to the door. When Sasuke caught up to her, he put his hand on her shoulder. Even with the buzz of alcohol in her brain, she recognized his touch and paused to smile up at him before they exited the warmth of the bar.

They made it a few more steps before Sakura suddenly stopped walking. She glared down at her shoes and then stepped out of them.

"I don't like these. I miss my boots," she declared in a childish way. So she kicked off her shoes, scooped them up in her arms, and continued walking with bare feet against the cold dirt.

"Sakura, stop," Sasuke groaned as he went after her. And Sakura did. She also turned around to point an accusatory shoe at him.

"And you promised to carry me."

Sasuke ended up holding her shoes too on the walk.

"You're not _that_ drunk. Why am I carrying these?" he complained. They were hooked onto his right hand and she could hear the heels click together with the sway of his movements.

His arms were wrapped around her legs. The warmth from his fingers on her bare thighs felt nice. Her hands linked loosely under his neck, leaving her fingers to rest against his collarbones. With each step he took, she could feel the pull and stretch of his muscles.

Sakura smiled, knowing that he couldn't see her.

She pressed her chin to his shoulder and he glanced back.

"You're carrying them because you're my favorite person in the whole world," Sakura drawled against his ear. She thought she saw him quickly avert his eyes.

"Drunkard," he muttered as he hoisted her up higher on his back, jostling her. Sakura flashed her biggest grin but continued drooping against his shoulder. It was comfortable there where she could rest her cheek against the curve where his shoulder and neck met.

"You should be more careful. I expect you don't let anyone else drag you home like this," she heard Sasuke nag her. The gruff edge to his voice was endearing. Sakura could almost imagine the look on his face- determinedly cool but failing all the same.

Grinning, she turned her head to the left and then the right before looking straight at the back of Sasuke's head.

"Yes, sir," she answered with a laugh. She pressed her nose to the back of his neck to watch his shoulders tense.

"That's cold," grumbled Sasuke. She hummed her tuneless assent. Wind gusted and she felt his grip tighten on her thighs for an instant.

"How do you wear a dress in this weather?" he asked. There was an incredulous note to his voice.

"Easy. I put it on my body and leave the house," she retorted.

Sasuke sighed and she could almost hear the eye roll in it. As an apology for her snark, she moved her hands to squish his cheeks together.

"Cheer up, Sasuke-kun. Maybe if you work hard enough, you'll have sexy legs like mine someday. And then you can wear dresses too," she teased. Sasuke outright snorted with laughter at that. A titter rose from Sakura too as she flung her arms across Sasuke's shoulders again. And for whatever reason- maybe the playfulness was infectious and had spread to Sasuke, but his hold slackened and he let her fall just a little before hoisting her back up again. A loud squeal burst from her mouth, warping into a laugh as she realized that he was _teasing her_. She squeezed her arms tighter around him in an impulsive hug.

"Come on. You have to admit that I've got some nice legs, though," Sakura insisted.

"Sure, Sakura," sighed Sasuke, clearly humoring her. She laughed again, this time the sound softening as she pressed her cheek to his shoulder again.

"Let's go home, Sasuke-kun," she murmured sleepily as she closed her eyes. Sakura missed the way his gaze flew to her when she spoke those words. And the rest of the way back to her place was travelled in silence. Sakura soaked in the soothing motion of Sasuke's even steps. She was rocked gently- back and forth in a way that reminded her of days long past.

In those times, if she fell asleep, it would be her father carrying her like this- before he had hurt his leg all those years ago. The scuff of his sandals against the hard-packed dirt accompanied the noise of his deep breaths. He spoke in low tones with her mother about the past, about business, maybe even about her. But it was there where she always felt at ease. Somehow, when she looked at that back now, Sakura was always a little confused by how it had once seemed so big to her. Her dad was so frail, really.

Bu the flex of Sasuke's muscles underneath her fingers reminded her where she was. She inhaled the dusty musk of leftover smells of cigarette and booze from the bar. Underneath, there was the scent of soap on his shirt.

She could have walked, really. But this, she decided, was a much much much better way to move.

For an instant, she opened her eyes to stare up at the deep blue sky glittering with millions of stars. Sakura remembered all the years she had spent looking up at them, wondering if Sasuke was looking at the same glimmers of light in the night sky. She held her breath as she slowly turned her attention to Sasuke. And to her surprise, his head was tilted back as he looked up at the diamonds shining in the darkness.

Something stirred in her chest that ached and longed and whispered things she had long closed her ears to. Sakura closed her eyes again. She kept them firmly shut until she heard Sasuke tell her that they had arrived. She was half-afraid that she would say something that she couldn't take back if she didn't.

Sasuke walked all the way through the gate and up the path to her door even though he didn't have to. He opened the door with his copy of the key and Sakura let him. He set her down on her feet, putting her shoes back in place on the rack. She wobbled just a little and had to lean against the wall until she regained her balance. When she felt Sasuke's hands on her shoulders, she let him turn her around.

"You really don't have to," Sakura sighed. Sasuke began unbuttoning her coat for her but she pushed his fingers out of the way. He stood watching her while she shed the coat and tossed it over the back of the sofa on her way to the kitchen. She teetered a little on the way but didn't stumble.

"What are you doing?"

"Ginger tea," she answered as the saucepan clanged onto the stovetop. She poured water into the pan from a pitcher and managed to slosh only a little over the side. The water hissed when it hit the hot burner. As she set the lid proudly on the pot, she heard Sasuke's bare feet pad into the kitchen.

"Ginger tea isn't an action," he said.

"Making it is," she snipped back.

She rose on her tiptoes to pull out a plastic container from the cupboard. When she pried the lid open, the pungent odor of ginger hit her nose. She had peeled, sliced, and dried this stash a few days ago. The spicy fragrance of the root still clung to the shirt siting in the hamper by her bed. As she dropped several pieces of the ginger into the hot water, Sakura felt Sasuke approaching.

One footstep. Two. Three.

She counted them steadily until she could feel him standing right behind her. He was just over her shoulder, looking down at the stove like Naruto always did when she was cooking dinner. But this felt different. Perhaps because the intention was clearly different.

"We should talk," he simply said. Sakura swallowed the lump in her throat.

"Do you really want to talk with me when I'm drunk? You might not get the same answer later," she warned him in a soft voice.

"Yes, I will. There'll just be less punching now," answered Sasuke.

"I'm not nearly as violent as you make me sound, you know." The hurt crept up into her voice as her shoulders stiffened. It seemed silly to her even as she said the words. They teased each other all the time. It was normal. Why get touchy over it after all this time? The drawn-out noise of Sasuke's sigh surprised her.

"...I know," he agreed after a long time.

Slowly, she felt him reaching out to her right hand. His fingertips spread up her palm, twining with her digits. The sensation of his cool skin against hers made her nerves tingle. She could feel the roughness of the callouses on his palm. The strength of his fingers as they slowly closed around hers was something she hadn't really noticed all those times before whenever she impulsively grabbed his hand or compared the lengths of their fingers as they walked home from late dinner.

Suddenly, everything was so alien.

She pulled her hand away in one sharp tug.

"Stop." The sound was so sharp. It was the kind of noise that popped bubbles and shattered china.

"No," she said like a child.

The air seemed to freeze around them as she gulped down nervous breaths.

And then she suddenly whirled to face him. She hadn't expected the vulnerability in his expression. His hand still hung where she had abandoned it.

"You can't do this to me, Sasuke," she firmly stated. Sasuke's eyebrows drew together. The familiar line on his forehead appeared as he examined her face. It was like he was tackling a particularly tricky puzzle.

"Do what?" Sasuke asked. There was no anger there. Only curiosity.

"You can't keep pulling me closer without telling me what you want. Is it sex? Intimacy? Do you want me to be your mother? What. Do. You. Want," she blurted out with hands fisting at her sides. Color rose to her cheeks as she stared fiercely into his face.

"What are you talking about? Is this something I need to say? It's obvious," Sasuke responded in the same calm voice. Sakura planted her palms on his chest and shoved. There was no chakra in the force but it was enough to set him back a step.

"Well I thought it was obvious too but apparently not. With Hyuuga I thought it was going to be a companionship thing but apparently he was looking for some sort of pity party. With Kiba I thought we genuinely liked each other but he ended up putting me up on some pedestal and admiring me from afar. And with you..." Sakura trailed off as she choked on her words. There was no easy way to describe what had happened all those years ago. Time had blurred those once sharp feelings until it was hard to put a name to them anymore.

"I thought I loved you once," admitted Sakura in a softer tone.

"You once said that you would die for me," Sasuke reminded her.

"And I still would." The anger returned to her voice. She stared defiantly up at him with hardened eyes.

"Would you die for me?" she demanded.

"Yes," answered Sasuke without an instant of hesitation. Feeling like an idiot, Sakura tried to swallow the lump that rose in her throat. Her eyes dropped to look down at her fisted hands. Guilt made the inside of her mouth suddenly taste bitter.

"And to answer your question, Sakura, what I want," Sasuke continued as he grabbed her forearm, "What I want is you." The simplicity of his words was a little surprising. But they rang with clarity and they rang with truth.

"I poured my heart out to you once and all it got me was pain," Sakura began in a low voice. She saw a scowl rise to his face and she quickly added, "I know that back then, you didn't have room in your heart for anything other than vengeance." The anger faded from his gaze. Sakura hesitated for a moment, searching for the right words that wouldn't hurt him.

"And now... Now I don't know if **I** have room for you anymore," she slowly admitted. Her eyes slowly rose to meet his. The grip on her forearm loosened before falling away completely.

"So just stop. I'm in no place for anything like this. Especially with you, Sasuke-kun," she sighed. Shame swelled up in her chest. She turned her face away from him, determined not to break out into the full, ugly sobs that she could feel building in her gut. But then Sasuke's hands were on her cheeks and his lips were on hers. It was a brief but tender touch that she scarcely had time to process before his gaze was burning directly into her eyes.

"No," she confirmed in a soft voice.

He kissed her one more time, cupping her face so carefully. This time his lips moved and she could hear the same, feeble voice calling out from somewhere inside.

"Sakura," Sasuke called and she opened her eyes.

"If there's one thing I know about you, it's that you will never not have room for someone in that ridiculously big heart of yours," he murmured.

Her irritation flared.

"Maybe there's no room for just you," she sniffed.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at her. But she continued to glare up at him. A stalemate, it seemed.

"You've gotten better at lying. But not that much better," replied Sasuke. He moved to kiss her again and she turned her head so his lips only made contact with her cheek.

"Don't flatter yourself, Uchiha. I'm not an easy woman," she warned him with a light bite to her words. This didn't seem to deter Sasuke at all. She almost drew in a gasp at the sudden warmth that showed in Sasuke's gaze. There was no mistaking the fondness- the familiarity in the way he gazed down at her.

"I know," he assured her.

Sakura took a long moment to consider headbutting his self-satisfied expression right then and there. Instead, she pulled herself free from his grasp to grab another mug out of the cabinet. She smacked it down on the counter while turning her head to give him a stern glare.

They sat at the kitchen table drinking tea. Sakura chatted about idle things between sips of her hot beverage. There was a generous dollop of honey in her cup while Sasuke drank his bitter. Her eyes mostly stayed focused on her mug. Only occasionally did her eyes flit up toward him. Sasuke was leaning back in his chair, arms relaxed at his sides but his gaze intense. Whenever their eyes met, Sakura had to try her hardest not to blush a little at the way he seemed unable to look away from her. Finally, she let out a strangled noise of frustration.

"Quit staring at me!" she huffed.

"No," Sasuke said.

But her feet were resting on top of his and that intimacy was what really mattered.

When the tea had gone cold and Sakura had run out of words to say, Sasuke got up to leave. Sakura walked with him to the door, much more sober now, but still a little unsteady on her feet. She pressed her shoulder blades to the wall to watch him put on his shoes. Sasuke had this way of slipping on one sandal, hitting the toe against the ground, and then putting on the other and doing the way.

"Why're you looking at me like that?" he asked as he straightened.

"Like what?" Her voice came out a little grumpier than she had meant. Sasuke's silence answered her so she spoke instead.

"I'm waiting for you to change your mind," admitted Sakura with a sigh.

He didn't say anything. With those alien brown eyes, Sasuke stared directly into her face. He picked up her hand and pressed his lips directly to the thin scar stretching across her palm. And then he was gone.

Sakura stood scoffing over the cheesiness of it all. But when it was time to brush her teeth and wash her face, she found that the woman in the mirror was smiling.

The next morning, Sakura saw weary slouches and sunglasses covering eyes that were sensitive to light. Nozomi and Takumi promptly accosted her in her office, Nozomi gushing about the handsome young man she had spent the entire night chatting with while Takumi recounted the horrific tale of an orderly who had managed to set himself on fire trying to do a flaming shot. Sakura gave up on trying to process both the voices at once and sat back in her chair to smile fondly at them. Kei joined them to comment slyly on Sakura's early departure. But Sakura easily deflected by asking them about the latest patients.

Morning rounds went by quickly and then she held a lecture on the endocrine system. The turn-out was good and the students had obviously done their assigned reading. Intelligent questions were asked. Discussion was productive. In a good mood, Sakura let them go half an hour early.

Takumi surprised her with take-out for lunch. They ate together in the morgue where nobody would interrupt them. She offered him some advice on one of his more stubborn patients and sent the young man off with a few words of encouragement. After lunch she met with the head nurse to talk about hospital supplies and then retreated to her office to sign off on paperwork for an hour or so. Then, it was time for the afternoon rounds. At 5, a team of Chunin were rushed into the ER. They were beaten and bloody, fresh from a mission. But cleaning up the blood revealed nothing more than a few cuts and broken bones. She set the limbs, sealing them with chakra, and left the stitches to one of the interns while she walked him through the steps.

When Sakura shed her white coat at 6, she turned around to see Sasuke letting himself in through the window in her office.

"I want udon," he simply said.

"Let me clock out and we can go," she replied just as easily. There was a moment of hesitation, where she worried that things might become awkward. But this was Sasuke. And this was her. They fell back into the pattern of comfort they had so carefully constructed together over months and months.

He watched her button up her jacket before they were off.

* * *

><p>There was a day when Sai randomly came to visit the hospital one day. This had once been a common occurrence and the staff still remembered him. But his recent work with ANBU had left him busy and so he hadn't really been able to visit. So when when Sai showed up with a bag in his hand Takumi had recognized him and steered him down the hall to the emergency room. Some of the nurses waved as he passed. When Kei looked up from her charts, she suddenly flushed red and ducked behind one of the orderlies as the men walked past.<p>

"Sensei, you have a visitor," Takumi called out when he couldn't find the woman.

It took a moment, and then he spotted Sakura sitting at the bedside of one of the patients. Letting out a sigh, he approached with Sai following close after.

"And then, when I get rich, I'll buy an estate in the mountains," the teenage girl declared.

Sakura laughed, affection brightening her expression. She saw her visitor approaching and got to her feet.

"Well, until then, you'll have to be a champ and take all the medicine the nurses bring you, alright?" she said, looking the girl in the eyes. There was a softness in her gaze but also a steeliness that warned the girl of the repercussions of refusing her medicine. There was a pause and then she bumped her fist against Sakura's.

"Deal."

Then, Sakura walked over to meet Sai. She eyed him with confusion until he handed her the bag from the familiar bakery. When she looked inside, predictably, there were little paper cartons holding bottles of custard. The little caramel drizzle over the tops glistened.

"A gift?" she guessed.

"A bribe. I think I dislocated my shoulder. I want you to fix it," he corrected her.

Sakura didn't even say anything. She promptly grabbed his left arm and pulled until she heard the satisfying pop of bones falling back into place. Sai winced as he turned his arm in a circle, testing the pain and range of motion.

"Thank you," he said with a polite nod of his head. The stiffness in his manners hadn't faded much. Sakura smiled.

"No problem. I haven't seen you around lately. You doing alright?" Sakura queried, putting her hand on her hip.

"Fine. I've been doing some... research for the Hokage," answered Sai as vaguely as possible. Sakura noticed the way his gaze roved casually around the ER once. If it were in private, he wouldn't mind divulging some of the private details of his work. But with so many potential leaks, he wouldn't dare say anything. Instead, he steered the topic in a safer direction.

"The child?" asked Sai with a glance toward the girl.

"An orphan. Scouts found her in one of the villages on the border. The whole place was burned down. Only she and one old man survived."

Sakura turned around to look at the girl who waved at her. She waved back before crossing her arms over her chest. The bandages around her face and arms betrayed so much pain despite her bright smile. But that pain was echoed in Sakura's expression as she faced Sai again.

"Even with my help, she's going to scar," whispered Sakura.

"Better to be scarred than dead," Sai offered.

The tightness in Sakura's expression softened a little.

"Today's food with Naruto," Sai abruptly reminded her. Sakura wasn't at all thrown by the sudden change in topic. That was just the way Sai was. He never worked his way gently to a new subject.

"I know," she answered. Team 7 always had a meal together at least once a week.

There was a pause but Sai didn't say anything else.

"And you're here to pick me up?" prompted Sakura. Sai just nodded. For a moment, Sakura was exasperated by her friend. Even Sasuke was better at this whole conversation thing than Sai was.

Sasuke.

Sakura swallowed thickly. Knowing him, he would come to the hospital to come pick her up too. Though a lot of the weird tension between him and Sai had cleared up, Sakura wasn't exactly sure how okay that made them. Whenever Sasuke's name came up in conversation, Sai looked as if he had stepped in dung in the middle of the street. A quick scan of chakra told her that Sasuke was not anywhere in the vicinity. Then again, Sasuke was no novice at concealing his presence. Still, she tugged on his shirt to begin leading him out of the ER. They travelled down the hall and to the elevator where Sakura stood stabbing the upward arrow until the metal doors slid open. As soon as the doors shut, Sakura cleared her throat to speak.

"Uh, I think I was actually going to meet up with Sasuke beforehand," she slowly admitted. She watched an odd look of irritation cross Sai's face.

Wrinkling her nose, Sakura looked at Sai carefully.

"Why exactly do you hate him so much?" demanded Sakura. Sai shrugged.

"While I'm convinced of his loyalty to the village, I think that he's not good enough for you," he promptly told her.

A startled laugh burst from her mouth. Leave it to Sai to be so candid that it almost sounded like a lie.

They reached Sakura's office up on the second floor where there was a nervous, lanky girl waiting by the door. Sweating profusely, she tried to ask a question about the day's lecture and stumbled over her words. Sakura patiently walked her through the concept she was struggling with. Sakura then pointed her toward certain chapters in her textbook before sending the girl off on her way. And then, setting down the bribe on her desk, Sakura took a moment to take a deep breath. she pulled the clip out of her hair to let it fall over her shoulders.

"I really appreciate you trying to look out for me, Sai. But you need to back off," Sakura sighed as she turned to look at him. Sai sat in the chair normally reserved for visitors to her office. He leaned back in it but didn't put his feet up on the desk like Naruto tended to. He had seen Sakura pinching Naruto's ear too many times in punishment to try such a risky behavior.

"But he's attracted to you," Sai bluntly said.

"I know," she answered with exasperation coloring her tone.

"And you're attracted to him," he added as he scrutinized her expression.

"Think what you like," Sakura sniffed. She met Sai's searching gaze to stick her tongue out at him.

Sai hung out in her office a little while longer before he accompanied her out to the nurse's station where she handed back files for the nurses to put away. She leaned against the counter, chatting amiably with them. When Sakura handed them the bag she had received from Sai, there were noises of surprise.

"For us? Why, Sensei?" one of them asked as they crowded around to look at the custards inside.

"I'm trying to cut back on the sweets. Would you mind helping me out?" Sakura answered with a smile. A chorus of thanks and laughter responded to her. Sakura lingered there for a while until she felt Sasuke's chakra flicker into existence somewhere downstairs. She glanced at Sai and found his expression suddenly a little stiffer. Letting out a sigh, she elbowed him.

"Go. I'll meet up with you guys. I don't need you starting a cat fight with him in the hospital," Sakura said. Sai either didn't understand the joke or didn't find it funny at all. Either way, he returned her look with an equally solemn one. Arms crossed over his chest, Sai seemed to say that he wasn't moving from the spot. Sakura very briefly considered throwing him out the nearest window. It was only the second floor. He wouldn't get hurt. But she decided against it when she saw Sasuke exit the stairwell and make his way toward her.

"Hi," Sakura chirruped, raising a hand in greeting.

"Hey," answered Sasuke. And then he glanced at Sai before giving him a curt sort of nod.

"Sai," Sasuke acknowledged him. There was a slight pause and then Sai nodded back.

"Uchiha."

"The idiot wants dinner tonight. Are you coming?" queried Sasuke as he turned his attention back to Sakura. She smiled.

"Of course. He's probably going to beg and beg for ramen so I've got to be there to put my foot down," she responded. Sasuke smirked.

"If you put your foot down, you might kill him," he quipped. Sakura pushed him lightly as she tried not to laugh. A light giggle escaped past her pursed lips as she looked away from him.

"Alright. I'll try not to kill him too badly then," she assured him.

After giving some basic instructions to the head nurse and also to Takumi, Sakura shed her white coat and replaced it with her jacket. Although she silently urged Sai to go on ahead with pointed looks and subtle nudges, he refused to be moved. Heaving a sigh, Sakura let him tag along. Though Sasuke also seemed to find Sai's presence unusual, he didn't say anything.

"How was work? Ino mentioned that she's been pretty swamped lately," Sakura asked Sasuke as they headed out the sliding doors.

"It's busy. We're processing some of the files from the Godaime's archives and there's a lot of information to deal with. I'm surprised how much the Hokages have always managed to hide from the village," Sasuke told her. Though Sakura didn't like the idea of having her mentor be accused of withholding secrets, she knew that there was no way that Tsunade had told the citizens everything. She also knew that there was a lot the Godaime hadn't told her as well. Sakura sighed. She missed her mentor. Not only in the operating room. She missed having the older woman around for her advice and for her support.

"There's a hawk," Sai suddenly said, pointing up at the sky. Following his finger, Sakura tilted her head back to stare upwards. The bright light stung her eyes but she managed to see the silhouette of the bird circling above. It was only when Sakura lifted her head that the hawk swooped down. Sakura recognized the shape of a scroll tied to its ankle. She raised her left arm and the bird promptly landed on it, flapping its wings as it let out a screech. She quickly ripped the cord from the scroll and unfurled it with a flick of her wrist.

The rounded loops of the characters were immediately familiar.

"It's from Shizune-senpai," Sakura said with surprise. In all the months since the Godaime had quietly departed, Sakura hadn't heard a peep from either her or Shizune. Sometimes Sakura summoned Katsuyu just to ask how Tsunade was doing. But the slug always replied that she hadn't heard from Tsunade either and Sakura figured the older woman was enjoying her retirement gambling her cares away through the countries.

"What does it say?" queried Sasuke.

But Sakura couldn't hear him as she read. The words seemed to blur together, darkening and twisting angrily. It was almost like the world was collapsing in on itself. She stared at the big character with the three boxes in the center. There was no way she was reading it wrong. It was a character she had seen a million different times in a million different books.

"No," Sakura spat. She made a fist, crumpling the edges of the scroll. Only half-aware of what she was doing, Sakura elbowed her way past Sai, striding off in the opposite direction. She vaguely heard Sasuke calling her name.

"No. No. NO," she muttered to herself as she broke into a fast walk- nearly a run. When someone grabbed onto her wrist, she roughly shook him off.

"Where are you even going?" demanded Sasuke. He was walking next to her now, matching her stride for stride.

"To Naruto," Sakura hissed back. The hot stinging in her eyes was definitely the prelude to tears. But she strode on, determined to hold it together until she was at least in the privacy of the Hokage's Tower. But the guards on duty seemed to practically throw themselves out of her way as she rushed past. She wasn't sure what her face looked like at the moment but she didn't really care.

Barging into the office, Sakura threw the crumpled scroll down on top of Naruto's other papers. Some of them went flying but she didn't care. He saw the whiteness of her face and let out a deep breath before he picked up the scroll. But the look of surprise morphed into concern as he read on. By the time he had finished the entire thing, his face had gone an odd shade of blue.

"What?" he whispered.

"I have to go, Naruto. She wouldn't send this message if it weren't severe," Sakura told him.

Naruto's knuckles turned white as he clenched the scroll tightly.

"Yeah. Of course. Take Sai and Sasuke with you," Naruto immediately agreed.

"No. I need to go alone, Naruto. Shishou wouldn't want anyone else to see her like this," she insisted.

Naruto hesitated for a long time with a grim look. He stared at Sakura with her white knuckles and her shaking hands. The shakiness of each breath she took was unmistakable but there was fire in her eyes. Naruto turned in his chair to look out the window at the village.

"...Then go," he sighed in a tired breath.

Sakura took off and she left less than an hour later. She didn't leave a note for her parents or for her friends. Naruto notified the hospital that she had been called away on an urgent mission but that was it. To the rest of the village, it seemed as if she had simply vanished.

Sakura plowed on through the forest, across the border, and up into strange territories so quickly that she nearly collapsed with exhaustion at the end of each day. Her jaw began to ache from always having her teeth clench but the anxiety in her heart refused to let her body take it easy. Her heart always felt like it was beating too quickly in her throat. There was a tight knot of worry in her gut that made all her food like sand against her tongue.

A few days later, Sakura arrived in a large resort village. She didn't even read the name of the place as she shoved her papers at the guards and waited for them to let her in. She sharpened her senses, searching desperately for the right chakra signature. It shouldn't have been difficult. This place was known for its tourism. The only shinobi around were those on vacation or the low-level hires standing guard duty for some diplomat. But it felt like forever before Sakura found the signature in a modest hotel near the edge of the village. She barely glanced at the concierge as she checked in and paid up-front in cash.

Up the stairs was an arduous journey. Each heavy footfall echoed in her ears a million times. The tiny squeaks ofd the wood under her soles seemed to magnify with each passing second. Even the noises of her breath was intolerably loud, pounding inside her head.

Sakura reached the room at the end of the hallway. It took a million years to get there. And when she did arrive, the doorknob turned under trembling fingers smudged with dirt. She stumbled inside, eyes flitting frantically around until they focused on the one queen bed at the end of the room. She lurched forward, grabbing desperately at the wrinkled hand that rose to greet her. Pressing the puckered palm to her cheek, Sakura squeezed her eyes shut and she let out a shaky breath.

"Shishou," she whispered brokenly.

"Damn Shizune. She shouldn't have told you," Tsunade croaked with a rasping chuckle.

A laugh bubbled out of Sakura that melted into breathy gasps as she tried so hard not to wail.

"You're dying, you old fool. Of course she told me," Sakura scolded as fat tears rolled down her cheeks. She squeezed the bony hand tight, unable to believe that it had only seen 65 years of life. The veiny skin and the spidery fingers were all wrong. Tsunade let out a hacking cough that made Sakura's gut clench in agonized empathy.

"Did you bring any sake?"

Sakura dissolved into sobs right there. She pressed a kiss to the wrinkled palm as she cried and cried. And even then, she knew, that somehow, part of her was laughing.


	16. White Chrysanthemum

Entropy

Chapter 16: White Chrysanthemum

Sakura came home twenty-three days later. The emptiness in her face made words redundant.

She went straight to Naruto's office, barging in while an ANBU was giving a report. She recognized his hair but was too tired to put a name to it. As he and Naruto stared at her, she trudged through the room and sat on top of the heavy desk. She heard the crumple of scrolls and paperwork collapsing under her weight. As she sat there, slumped and staring out the window, she vaguely heard Naruto dismissing the man. The only sounds she could really register were the door slamming shut and Naruto gently calling her name as he grasped her forearm.

An ugly sob ripped up from her chest. Words were lost to her as she sat there, hunching in closer and closer to herself until her forehead touched her thighs.

A wail slipped through her lips. Keening, tearing pain clawed through her chest.

And Naruto. Beautiful, sweet Naruto. Her brother beyond blood. Her best friend.

Naruto sat down on the desk beside her, tearing more papers and knocking over an inkstone. The black liquid spilled across the surface, a slow-moving puddle, while Naruto sucked in a breath through clenched teeth and accompanied Sakura's crying with quiet tears of his own.

Stomach cancer, he mouthed to himself as he stared down at the village.

Sakura clocked into work a few hours later. She avoided the upper floors, instead burying herself in research in the sub-basement lab. Nozomi saw the swollen eyes but stayed silent. They surrounded themselves with petri dishes and vials of colored liquids. Pencils scratched across paper and the occasional chair scraped across the ground as someone stood to get a fresh set of slides. Long after everyone else had gone home for the night, Sakura stayed in the sterile room, squinting into microscopes. It was only 18 hours into her shift that Takumi found her.

Takumi stood in the doorway, clipboard hanging at his side. He watched the drooping slope of her shoulders. Every once in a while, she lifted her hand to wipe at her face. He could hear her sniffles.

"Sensei," he finally called after several minutes.

Sakura didn't say anything.

Sighing, he stepped into the room. He stood just beside her, watching as she switched out the slide for a new one. She scribbled something in her notes- something half-legible and wildly crooked. It was nothing like her normal hand. A single tear dripped onto the counter as Sakura sniffed again.

"Sensei, go home. You've been here since yesterday afternoon," Takumi uttered. He had clocked in for the beginning of his shift at 8 am and noticed that she hadn't signed out. When he found her office empty, it wasn't difficult to deduce where she was.

Sakura stubbornly went on ignoring him. Closing one eye, she stared into the microscope. She carefully adjusted the lenses to focus in on the slide clipped to the stage.

"Sensei, you're going to contaminate the samples if you keep crying. Go home!" Takumi tried again. His voice was sharper with irritation. He quickly clapped a hand over his mouth as he heard just how rude he sounded. But it caught Sakura's attention. Her hand dropped as she looked up at him. Red rimmed her puffy eyes.

"Tsunade's dead," she rasped out.

The clipboard clattered to the tiled floor. Takumi stood gaping while Sakura got to her feet. She picked up her access card to slip it into the pocket of her white coat.

"I'm taking today off. I'll leave things to you, Takumi," Sakura croaked.

She walked home in slow, unfaltering steps across rooftops. The sunlight warmed her face despite the chilly wind. Smells of freshly-baked bread wafted up from the streets below. She could hear the shouts and laughter of children running late to their classes at the nearby academy. Arms hugged tightly around herself, Sakura tried to convince herself that she wasn't turning transparent.

When she got home, she ran a bath. The knob turned to hot until billows of steam rose up from the curve of the tub. While the water poured from the faucet, she went to the kitchen where she knew a twelve-pack sat in the corner next to paper recycling she hadn't had a chance to take out yet. She had bought it right before her sudden departure. She picked up the box and carried it to the bathroom where she plopped it down on floor. She meticulously pulled out each can to stack on top of the closed toilet lid. Once all twelve cans were out, Sakura tossed the empty box into the corner and stood staring at them, waiting for the tub to fill halfway until she stepped in- still in her clothes.

By the time Sasuke let himself in, her feet were pruney.

The mirror was fogged up and the air felt damp. She didn't say hi when he opened the door and stood there staring at her.

There were no more tears by the time Sasuke got there. Sakura chugged down warm beers with dry eyes. Sasuke stood there for a long time, like he was waiting for her to speak. She leaned back in the tub to stare up at the ceiling. She saw a spiderweb.

"She told me that she loved me," she said.

"That was the last thing she said to me. She told me that she was proud and that she loved me."

The beer can collapsed in her right fist. It sounded like a skull when it shattered between her fingers. The flattened can went into the trash before she was reaching for another beer. But then she stopped. Her fingers touched the top of the next can and then slid off. She could see her wavering reflection in the water. She looked angry.

"She was 65."

Snap.

She opened the next beer anyway. The can didn't touch her lips. She let it sit fizzling and dripping foam down the side. Sasuke entered the bathroom to sit next to the tub. Sakura didn't bother to warn him that the bathmat was probably wet. He didn't seem to care.

He held her hand. She leaned against the wall, limp and quiet as she thought.

They sat that way, unmoving and silent until she heard Sasuke leaning forward. She turned her head in time to see him pop open the tab on another beer. He hit the side of his can against the opened one she hadn't touched. Fat drops of condensation rolled down the sides of the drinks. They wet Sasuke's fingertips.

"To Tsunade," he said and gulped.

Sakura closed her eyes. Her soaked clothes felt heavy and she needed to wash her hair.

Days later, Sasuke came home after work to a chakra signature in his apartment. He was in no hurry as he went to his bedroom.

"Sasuke-kun."

Sakura sat, tired and pale in the open window. There was a kunai spinning around her finger by the handle and a plastic bag in her other hand. She wasn't smiling but they both knew she was happy to see him.

"I brought sushi. Eat it with me," she ordered while she slid into his room. Her feet twisted and turned. She had already memorized the layout of his trip wires and traps. One wrong move would send a tag exploding in her face. The kunai slipped back into her pocket.

"Hey, you don't get to look so gloomy. You're supposed to cheer me up," she said, slapping him on the back. And then she walked off, boots held in her hand like she owned the place.

* * *

><p>Old patterns quickly returned. Work at the hospital was the same. Nothing had fallen apart without her. The village had continued functioning, ignorant to the fact that such a great soul had gone from the world. Sakura stood in her office, staring out the window. She quelled the urge to scream that Tsunade was dead. Her ashes were with Shizune. But no one else had attended the quiet funeral. How could they have? No one else knew. So Sakura kept on her best smile for her patients and for the staff.<p>

She had taken whatever comfort Naruto had to give. But he had a village to run. He had a wedding to plan. While Tsunade's death had shaken Naruto as well, he was moving forward so quickly that he had no time to look back. Sakura looked on him with some amount of envy. She seemed to be the only one clinging to memories.

Though Sai had always been her go-to for support, she knew that Sai, while always willing to listen, seldom understood. He understood, he understood pain and loss. But the complexities of human relationships were still difficult for him. How could he know the deep bond a student felt to her mentor? It wasn't fair to ask him to empathize with her when she knew he couldn't.

"Sakura."

In the middle of the busy marketplace, she heard her name. Blinking out of her reverie, she looked up to see Sasuke standing there. His hands were in his pockets and it was clear that he had stopped mid-step. It was still so strange to see him wearing the green flak jacket of a jounin. She always forgot that he was a jounin now. When had that happened anyway?

"Hi," she weakly said.

She could see it in his eyes. He already knew that she hadn't noticed him. Her chakra reserves were so low from overworking again. Of course she wouldn't be able to sense anyone.

She half-expected him to remark that she looked like shit. Instead, he glanced around.

"You eat dinner yet?" he asked.

"No," Sakura replied.

"Come on."

She didn't care that people would see them. She didn't care about the stares or the whispers. Sakura took his hand and let him lead her into whatever restaurant was nearby.

She didn't remember what they talked about over dinner. She didn't remember what she ate or if it had even tasted vaguely good.

Sasuke sat there, not forcing words. Sakura knew that this was him, in his awkward way, offering her his attention, letting her know that it was okay for her to talk to him. And in a strangely counterintuitive way, just eating with him made it so that she didn't need to speak. The waiter gave them worried looks whenever he passed by and saw that neither of them were speaking. Even the bill was paid in silence.

"I'm not really okay," she admitted on the way back.

"But I can't mope around at work. Someone in my position can't do that," she added needlessly.

"For someone so good at taking care of others, you give yourself a lot of crap," Sasuke noted.

"...Yeah," she agreed.

"A patient's father got really mad at me," she told him one day. It was one of those impulsive nights where she showed up at Sasuke's apartment with a bottle of wine and parked herself on the couch. She knew he didn't mind. He usually trained after work and then spent the rest of the night reading files from the office over dinner.

She sat on the coffee table and put her feet up on the sofa. Sasuke just looked at her. He was used to her using furniture the wrong way.

"His son had a congenital heart problem and they've been waiting for a donor for about two years. But you can't perform a transplant if the patient is sick. It's too risky," Sakura explained. It occurred to her that she always went into detail about work when she was with him. If he let her, she could go on and on about the circulatory and genetics and everything else. It was hard to tell if she did it because he asked questions or if he asked to humor her. She didn't mind it either way.

"Why don't you just grow him a new heart?" Sasuke asked.

Sakura was startled. Logically, since she had grown Naruto new lungs and somehow grown a new uterus, it wasn't strange to wonder if it was possible to be done again. Sasuke's insight sometimes surprised her. He wasn't just smart. He was intelligent. But she had to shake her head.

"The kind of energy it takes to grow a new organ like that is tremendous. I'd have to tap into my seal. And you saw what it did to Naruto. You can't be unconscious for the procedure. The pain would send him into shock and kill him. And just the amount of stress it puts on the body would make his heart give out before I could do anything," she said.

"Then why is it okay with Naruto?"

Sakura tried not to laugh. Of course he would be confused. They were both shinobi but the worlds they lived in were so different. She could break all his rules with her hands. But she supposed it was a fair trade. Sometimes the most obvious and cruel truths about his world were hard to swallow.

"It's okay with Naruto because he's got the Kyuubi inside him. The secondary chakra acts as a sort of shield for his body. My chakra will never be enough to overpower his. Naruto is literally the only other person I can perform that procedure on," she admitted. Then she sat there, staring into the bottle of wine held in her left hand.

"And the only reason **I** don't die is because my own body refuses to let me," she added in a softer voice.

She heard Sasuke's pen drop.

"It's not fair. Shishou spends her whole life healing people and doing amazing things and she dies from cancer. And look at me. I grow myself new organs without even realizing it. I couldn't even help her," she bit out. Then she gulped down some wine. She rubbed at her mouth, feeling the balm smear across the back of her hand.

Sasuke put his book down. His chair scraped across the floor so she followed him with her eyes as he moved into the kitchen. He opened up a cabinet.

"First of all, you're the one that bought these damn things so use them," Sasuke said when he walked over to set a wine glass on the coffee table next to her hand. Then he sat on the sofa, putting his feet up on the coffee table. They were sitting in exact opposite poses.

Making a face, she poured herself a generous glass and put the wine bottle down on the floor.

"And secondly, are you really blaming yourself that someone else got cancer?" he queried.

"She's not **someone else**!" Sakura immediately snapped.

"She is. She's not you. You can't control that. You can't will it not to happen," Sasuke retaliated. There was an edge of irritation to his voice.

"I should have been there for her. I shouldn't have let her go without me. I could've helped her," she mumbled. Her shoulders hunched. Everything felt so heavy.

"She left because she could trust you."

It got very quiet. Sakura rested her cheek on her knee, turning her head to look at Sasuke. She traced the curve of his frowning mouth with her gaze before she handed him the wine glass. He drank it without complaint even though it was sweet.

"You know, Shizune-senpai and I always used to joke that Shishou's legacy was too big- that it had to be cut in two. So when she was leaving, Shizune-senpai said I was taking on the role of doctor and she was getting the wandering gambler half," Sakura said. She smiled a little.

"What'll she do now that Tsunade's gone?" asked Sasuke. His gaze was soft and unguarded.

"She won't come back for a while. She said she would return eventually. But my guess is that she'll probably wander for a while. She might not come ever- if she finds somewhere to settle."

Sakura could imagine Shizune starting up her own clinic in some rural village. She had always liked working one-on-one with people. The glitz and politics of big hospitals had never been her favorite.

There was a long pause. Sakura waited for Sasuke to say something. He set down the wine glass, rubbing his thumb over the clear stem.

"Is it... alright if she doesn't come back?"

Sakura considered this for a moment. She imagined Shizune handing out lollipops to her younger patients. Maybe she would find a place she liked. The wrinkles would multiply on her face as her hairs grew white. She could settle down, maybe even get married if she liked. The one thing really tying her to Konoha had been Tsunade and now she was gone.

"I think so," Sakura slowly responded. And then she shook her head.

"No. Definitely. It would definitely be alright," she amended.

* * *

><p>"We've kissed a few times," Sakura admitted to Ino over coffee. Ino almost spat the beverage out.<p>

But those moments were always unexpected.

Sometimes they sat late at night with the streetlights filling Sasuke's kitchen with orange. There was the smell of the cool night that clung to her jacket as she walked in. And when she shed that outer layer, the antiseptic bite of the hospital wafted off her skin and clothes. Sometimes she wouldn't even say hello as she walked in, opening the door with a key of her own. She made coffee, moving around the kitchen and using the red mug set aside for her.

With the mug of hot coffee cradled in her hands, she sat on the counter, bare feet swinging lightly. And after a long day of work at the hospital, her hair was forever falling out of the clip and into her face. Her fingers curled carefully around the cup, cradling it gently in her palms.

And once, she closed her eyes for an instant to blink. They had been talking about something trivial but suddenly Sakura blinked and the light hit her in a way so that her eyelashes were transparent but they casted feathery shadows across her cheekbones. And then Sasuke leaned in to kiss her. Her gasp drew inwards instead of escaping her mouth.

"Sasuke-kun, no," she whispered.

And she curled into herself, steeling herself. She didn't know what to expect. His disappointment or even his anger? And he was sort of frozen, tensing like he was waiting for her fist. But they both sat there, staring at each other, hovering just far apart to not quite be touching.

"Alright," Sasuke finally said.

Letting out a breath of relief, she hugged him tightly.

It's not you, she always assured him.

"It's not your fault," she insisted, "Just right now... Right now, I'm no good for that. I'm just too..."

She almost said "depressed" but that wasn't right. It was grief. A large chunk of it was undoubtedly grief. But what about everything else? How could she express the anxiety and the apprehension and the excitement she felt whenever he did something like that? She could have explained. She should have explained. But the words and feelings tangled up and all she could do was offer him those half-finished sentences.

Sasuke understood. At least, she thought he did.

As the weather started to warm, Sakura started to leave her windows open. Naruto and Sai picked on her, teasing her that it was silly for a kunoichi to leave her home so exposed to danger.

"Anyone could waltz in," Naruto chuckled.

The idea was ridiculous. If anyone was to break in, everyone knew that Sakura wouldn't hesitate to break his face. But the teasing kept things light and it made her smile so Naruto did it each time they met up to eat.

But the windows stayed open.

And part of it definitely had to do with Sasuke showing up whenever he pleased. Mostly she spared him a smile without looking up from her books and notes. She was studying diligently as the hospital analyzed the chemical warfare encountered on the battlefield. Though the remaining Root defectors had been tracked down and either imprisoned or executed, there was a chance that their research had somehow survived. Seeing the devastating effects of the bastardized Delta-Hachi firsthand, Sakura was determined to never let something like that happen again.

But she always had time to smile for Sasuke.

A few times, she felt him approach the window to her study where there would be no one. He looped around, hopping over the fence and letting himself in through the back door to find her brewing up concoctions in the kitchen. The air was thick with the smells of plants. Stems and leaves littered the countertops while oddly-colored mixes bubbled away on the stove.

Those instances, she took off her goggles and pushed the vials aside. She brew up some tea and they stood in the kitchen. Sasuke pointed at her work, asking questions about the herbs or about the liquids themselves. Somehow she doubted that it was really her work he was interested in so once she asked. Why did he always ask so many things?

"Part of it is that I'm interested. But you look happiest when you're talking about your work," he admitted.

And it was true that there was a sparkle that lit up in her gaze as she looked down at her work.

Once, she cradled a yellow flower in her palm as she babbled on and on about its amazing properties. It could be boiled into a tea, mashed into a poultice. The list was endless. And the excitement was so vivid. Everything was animated and bright about her as she marveled at the wonders of nature. For that moment, she was the Sakura he remembered. And he kissed her, cutting off her words.

She pulled away with a soft look. Her eyes appeared wet but she wasn't crying. She pressed her free hand to Sasuke's chest where his heart was. The quickened thud of its beat whispered against her palm.

"Not now," she quietly told him. There was a promise in her words. She looked up, staring right at him in the way that she could never bring herself to do when she lied to him. There was no disappointment in that time. Just anticipation.

Another time, they were eating dried squid, tearing the papery strips off with their hands. It was too early in the year for this. Dried squid was for balmy summer nights- for the times when it was just too hot to sleep. But it was alright. With the damp smells of earth and of new flowers, they watched the village close its eyes before the nightlife bubbled upward. As lights went out, new ones flickered on.

"I want to move back into the Uchiha compound," Sasuke told her.

Because every time he visited, he looked at the abandoned, dust-filled district. He traced her careful steps and imagined her hugging flowers to her chest. She was always careful not to disturb anything except for that one path she left in the years of dirt. There was a hollowness to the whole place. It was a glorified graveyard. Sasuke sometimes wished that this part of the village would have been destroyed in Akatsuki's attack as well. But he kept such thoughts to himself.

A piece of squid fell from her hands. It rolled down the shingles, flipping and skidding before disappearing off the edge to land in her front yard among blades of grass.

"What?" she breathed even though she had heard him perfectly.

They sat in strange silence as thoughts raced through her head.

"Will you be alright?" was what she finally asked.

"I need to go home, Sakura," he answered.

"I know. But will you be alright?" Sakura insisted on knowing. The rest of the squid fell in her lap as she grabbed his wrists. And she stared at him, staring so hard in the hopes that if she did, she would be able to peel back one of the layers covering up the person she called Uchiha Sasuke.

"I will be," he replied.

Truth rang clear in his words.

She put her hands on his face and kissed him. There was the taste of salt on both their lips. And even though she was the one who surprised him, she was suddenly breathless and faintly pink in the face. When she suddenly pulled back with a blush blooming across her face, Sasuke smirked at her.

* * *

><p>"So you've kissed him a bunch of times," Ino demanded.<p>

'I did say a few times, Ino," answered Sakura with a shrug. Ino looked ready to explode.

"And?"

"And nothing. It's just the way it is," Sakura insisted. But Ino crossed her arms over her generous chest.

"Come on, girl. I know you better than that. You should be up in the clouds," probed Ino.

Smile faltering, Sakura let out a heavy sigh.

"Tsunade-shishou's dead, Ino."

Sakura stayed by Tsunade's side for as long as possible. 13 days passed in that town. She begged and begged for the woman to try surgery or even some kinds of medication. But Tsunade always grimly shook her head, stubborn as a mule even in the face of death. So all that was left was for Shizune to make their mentor as comfortable as possible. Morphine was hooked into the IV drip. The fluffiest pillows were procured. Sakura used every ounce of her charm to convince Tsunade to eat something.

It was difficult for both younger women to watch the great Tsunade wheezing into her breathing tube and vomiting up her meals. More than the bodily pain, Tsunade seemed to detest the sheer humiliation of her condition. The disease ate away at her energy and the sight of bedpans, she admitted, filled her with shame and relief all at once. Sakura knew that was why Tsunade had kept her illness a secret for all this time.

Sakura wiped Tsunade's forehead with damp cloths. She sat by her side telling her stories of the village and about Naruto especially. She had been told, years ago, that Naruto reminded the Godaime so much of her little brother. It went without saying that he had died. Sakura understood that was why she hadn't flicked Naruto into oblivion every time he barged into her office with another one of his ridiculous requests. Sakura smiled as she described his shining hope for the future. And even though she sometimes teased his idealistic view of life, she knew that if anyone could create such a utopia, it would be him. The little orphan boy who once sat on the swings by himself would never let her down.

And then, with much reluctance, Sakura admitted the story of her own condition since the time that Tsunade and Shizune had departed in the spring. The two women listened with solemn expressions, occasionally exchanging worried looks.

"And now, Sakura?" prompted Shizune.

"I've menstruated once. It lasted the normal length of time. Everything is functional," she reported. As she spoke, Shizune placed a hand on her belly. A cool surge of chakra flowed from the fingertips, piercing deep into her stomach to search. Sakura could feel the chakra twisting between muscles and past membranes as Shizune examined the organs there. The knotted, warped scar tissue that had once been there was gone.

"It's fine. Completely normal," Shizune whispered. Awe colored her tone as she peered into Sakura's face.

And then, when Sakura had expected Tsunade to be happy for her, a bomb was dropped on her.

"Sakura, you will still very likely be unable to be a mother," Tsunade rasped out.

The blow numbed her. When Tsunade passed away in the middle of the night, Sakura sat silently contemplating those words. She and Shizune had their teacher quietly cremated and placed in an urn. Sakura hugged Shizune tight and then left, not even a full day after Tsunade had passed. The pain knotted tight in her chest, making it hard to breathe. But she forced herself to walk, plodding along the border of Fire Country with dry cheeks.

It would seem odd to others. Maybe even cold. But Sakura left Shizune, knowing that for them, there would be no solace in companionship. They would have only amplified the pain as they wept together. The only bitter tears Sakura shed on the way back were for Tsunade's ominous warning. To have what was taken from her given back and to have celebrated only to have that very same thing ripped away again was doubly painful. The reality of Tsunade's death only hit her when she came home and saw Naruto's golden face all bright and concerned for her.

"What do you mean you can't be a mother? You're fine now. You said so yourself," Ino interrupted with a scowl. She fiddled with her wedding band as she spoke.

"My immune system response is too strong. It obliterates pathogens and foreign objects much too efficiently," Sakura elaborated. She watched Ino's eyes narrow as she thought before they grew wide.

"You mean... it would identify a fertilized egg as a threat and obliterate it," Ino concluded. Her expression grew pensive. The genetic material contained in it would only be half hers. And an over-vigilant defense system would waste no time in eliminating an intruder.

"You don't catch colds, Forehead," Ino suddenly noted. Sakura gave her a grim smile. It had been years since her body had grown used to healing almost naturally. And sometimes treating herself as an incubator for diseases and poisons hadn't helped the situation. Sakura's defense system was tough- tougher than tough. Ino leaned back on the sofa, staring at her best friend. Her mouth puckered as she thought deeply.

"Shishou said that it was actually not uncommon with female medics of our caliber. She said that it was the same for her and for Shizune-senpai," Sakura added.

"Okay, maybe I'm an idiot. But why is this holding you back from things with Sasuke?" the blonde slowly queried.

"Ino... he's the last one."

Ino stared at her like she had just said that the sky was blue.

"Duh," Ino retorted. Sakura kicked at her.

"I mean that he's the last Uchiha, you moron. As in there's just one. Ever since we were kids, he's only had two goals," Sakura snapped, her tone sharpening with exasperation.

"First," Sakura continued, counting off on her fingers, "Kill his brother. Second restore his family both literally and in terms of reputation."

"So you're afraid to admit that you love Uchiha Sasuke because you can't pop out some babies for him," Ino loudly interrupted.

"Well what would you do in my situation, INO?" Sakura growled.

"I would cross that fucking bridge when I got to it, SAKURA. You're not even at the bridge yet. You're way off in the neighboring country hacking through reeds. But you're worried about the stupid bridge in the distance," Ino retorted just as adamantly.

"Not thinking ahead to the bridge is stupid," Sakura huffed.

"Yes. It is. But refusing to take a step forward and never getting anywhere because of a dumb bridge is stupider," Ino said.

"It's realistic," insisted Sakura.

"It's fatalistic and idiotic and I want to punch you in the face," Ino snarled.

There was a long pause. Both women scowled, refusing to look at each other. When Sakura finally did glance at Ino, she elbowed her friend.

"By the way, when did I ever say I love him? I don't love him," Sakura grumped out. At this, Ino let out an incredulous laugh.

"Girl, your lips didn't. But your everything else did. Don't even try to lie to me," Ino snorted. Sakura's eyes narrowed into a glare.

"Shut up, Piggy."

"Never, Forehead."

* * *

><p>Naruto and Hinata were married in the beginning of March.<p>

It was a traditional Shinto ceremony. Despite the fact that neither Hinata nor Naruto were particularly religious, it was a Hyuuga tradition that Hinata wanted to honor. It took place in the only shrine in the village, conducted by an old priest with a scraggly beard. While many people wanted to attend, the number of guests was kept down to accommodate the smaller building.

Hinata's white kimono was pristine and crisp. The headdress she wore covered her dark hair and framed her face in swaths of snowy cotton. Sakura was certain that Naruto was trying his best not to exclaim loudly over his bride's beauty in the middle of the proceedings.

Everyone stood and bowed to be purified before the ceremony. As Naruto and Hinata exchanged cups of sake to sip and exchange. Naruto read out his words of commitment, surprisingly calm in the stony faces of all the Hyuuga clansmen attending. Sakura only knew the effort it took because he had spent several nights keeping Sasuke and her up as he stuttered out his lines over and over again. Then the couple left an offering to the gods on the altar and performed the bows and claps to ensure a happy marriage. Rings were exchanged and Sakura caught that Naruto's hand was shaking so badly that Hinata subtly helped him guide the ring onto her finger.

The celebration afterwards was opened up to the entire village so to call it a lively affair was a gross understatement. The main dining hall was set up in one of the Hyuuga family's sprawling estates. There were specific spots set up for the Hyuuga elders and for the family of the groom. Sakura shuddered to think of how much money the Hyuuga clan was spending on this party alone.

When Sakura was led to the spot directly right of the groom, she felt a lump form in her throat. This order was all wrong. It should have been Jiraiya here, with Tsunade next to him, and then her. But Naruto spotted her and genuine tears welled up in his sky blue eyes. Completely abandoning all propriety and rules, he rose from his seat to smother her in a tight hug.

"My brother. Look at you," she whispered as she wrapped her arms around his middle.

"I'm so glad you're here, Sakura-chan," Naruto choked out in return. Then he opened his eyes to see Sasuke standing behind Sakura.

"You're not escaping. Group hug. Come on, Sasuke," demanded Naruto. Sasuke glared at him.

"Do it. It's my wedding," Naruto insisted. The stubborn stare Sasuke gave in response seemed to put the two of them in a stalement. This was quickly broken when Sakura reached back and hooked her arm around Sasuke's waist. With a little chakra, she pulled him in. And Naruto locked his arms around them all squeezing and squeezing until Sakura began to feel a little uncomfortable breathing.

"Will you kill me if I punch the groom on his wedding day?" muttered Sasuke as he hung slightly off the ground. His toes just barely skimmed the wood.

"Absolutely," Sakura answered in a cheery tone.

But Naruto soon put them down and Sasuke punched him on the arm all the same. Sakura chatted with Hinata for a bit but then withdrew, freeing up the bride to attend to her other guests. Once most of the food was eaten and people started to delve heavily into the alcohol, Sakura filched one of the big bottles of sake and slipped outside. Sasuke was talking to Shikamaru but their eyes met as she fled and she knew Sasuke would find her eventually.

Sakura wandered around in the backyard for a while, admiring the brightly-colored koi in the pond and the neatly-trimmed plants filling the spaces. But as she lifted the bottle to take a swig, she heard a polite cough.

"This is quite a sight," Kakashi drawled as he appeared beside her. He had probably been lounging on the roof, away from people. Unruffled, Sakura took a generous sip and took her time swishing it around in her mouth before swallowing loudly. Just to be obnoxious, she smacked her lips.

"I'm surprised you're still here, Kakashi-senpai. I thought you'd be gone as soon as you'd eaten," Sakura said as she offered him the bottle. Kakashi shook his head.

"I'm part of the council now. People notice when I'm gone. I have to stay at least another hour before I can leave without any one of these oldies complaining," sighed Kakashi. He scratched the back of his head.

"Small note: you're one of those oldies now," Sakura remarked with a cheeky grin.

"As hurtful as always, Sakura-chan. How are you doing?" Kakashi responded.

"Swell," answered Sakura before taking another drink.

"I can see that," replied Kakashi with a silver eyebrow rising.

"Hey. No judging. You read porn in public," warned Sakura. Kakashi raised his hands in a placating gesture. But then her scowl dropped and she extended her arm to him for a quick hug. She felt his gloved hand pat her back a few times before ruffling her hair when they pulled apart.

"I need to get back in there and schmooze for a bit. Have a drink for me, Sakura-chan," drawled Kakashi with a pointed look toward the lively building. Sakura nudged him forward.

"I'll have two in your honor," Sakura laughed. They squeezed each other's hands before Kakashi slipped back into the fray. But as Kakashi stepped up onto the raised platform, he passed Naruto who waved cheerfully. Walking bow-legged in his stiff geta, Naruto clomped over to squeeze Sakura in another big hug.

"What're you doing? Get back in there," scolded Sakura as soon as she was set down. But Naruto happily ignored her. He took her hand and pulled her along until she was forced to match pace with his leisurely stroll in the garden. They walked along the stone pathway, in the bright rectangles of light that shone onto the ground from the sliding doors left open. But soon they reached part of the yard where no lights shown. The doors were shut securely and only shadows of tree branches sprayed across the grass there.

Naruto suddenly sat down on the deck there. Sakura followed suit. She set her sake bottle down too, off to the side. Naruto's hand was still gripping her's tightly. His palm felt clammy.

"I got married, Sakura-chan," uttered Naruto. He stared up at the sky. Slipping her feet out of her heels, Sakura sighed.

"You did," she agreed. She took another sip of sake and offered the bottle to Naruto. He shook his head. When Naruto finally let got of her hand, it was to cross his arms behind his head and flop onto his back. She folded her legs under herself. Though it would be spring in a couple weeks, the night air was cold on her calves. Sakura idly picked at some lint on her black dress as she waited for him to speak. But Naruto didn't seem to have anything to say. He lay there, eyes closed and humming quietly to himself.

"Hey, Naruto," called out Sakura in a soft voice. They both heard Sasuke's quiet footsteps on the wood. He didn't announce himself. Hands in the pockets of his black slacks, he walked over and seated himself on the other side of Sakura.

"Congratulations, Idiot," Sasuke said. Naruto snorted as he gave a half-hearted middle finger.

"Isn't the bride looking for the groom?" Sakura queried in a low voice. She leaned in toward Sasuke, pretending not to notice him slipping his fingers through hers. With his other hand, he loosened his white tie. There was the faint fragrance of cologne wafting from his crisp shirt.

"The last I saw, Rock Lee was singing karaoke. I don't think anyone's noticed the Idiot-sama's absence yet," Sasuke replied. Eyes sliding shut, Sakura nodded before leaning against his shoulder. Naruto's hand flopped as he searched for her. When he finally made contact with her leg, he moved down until he was patting her ankle.

"I... am really glad that you're here. All three of you," Naruto admitted out loud. And at those words, Sakura tilted her head back until she noticed a foot hanging down from the roof. There was a pause before Sai slid down from the sloping roof. He landed soundlessly between Naruto and Sakura.

"Eavesdropping? Rude," scoffed Sakura with a smile to let Sai know that she was joking. She saw the way his dark eyes flitted down to her and Sasuke holding hands. A disapproving twist to his mouth conveyed enough. But he seemed to decide against saying anything out loud.

"I wasn't quite certain if I was welcome at this intimate moment," Sai professed as he looked over at Naruto.

"Don't be ridiculous. You're a part of Team 7," snorted Naruto.

Sakura missed it because she was occupied with staring up at the night sky. But Sai glanced over at Sasuke. The two men stared at one another before Sasuke nodded ever so slightly. Sai hesitated for an instant before he returned the gesture. And the thick knots of tension still weaving between them after all this time slowly began to loosen.

After several minutes, Sakura shooed Naruto back to the banquet. She got to her feet too, grabbing a flustered Kei from a conversation and pushing her into Sai's direction. The girl's interest in the pale man had never been subtle. And after a year of wary glances and quiet blushes, Sakura figured that it was time to interfere. When Sasuke raised an eyebrow at her, Sakura shrugged without guilt.

"You feeling alright?" Sasuke queried as they sat back down at the table. A very intoxicated Kiba was currently doing a duet on the karaoke machine with Shino. Kurenai was shaking her head in the background somewhere. A cheer rose from elsewhere in the room.

Sakura looked over at Naruto and Hinata speaking at the head of the table. Their heads were close together and she could tell that their hands were linked underneath the tabletop. Hinata's father looked on at them with his usual sour expression. But something about his stare seemed slightly less dour that night.

"I'm fine," Sakura assured Sasuke.

The words that left her mouth were genuine. When their fingers twisted together under the table, Sakura didn't say anything. She kept a straight face. Pretending to be casually glancing at people to her right, she nudged Sasuke's arm with hers.

"What'll be my excuse if Naruto notices us holding hands?" she questioned. There was a slight pause- the quiet was filled in by the scuffle of Lee trying to grab the microphone from Shino.

"You yell something ridiculous like 'UFO', point off into the sky, and we run," responded Sasuke with an equally casual expression.

"Stupid," scoffed Sakura, lifting her glass of wine to her lips.

"Like you're not," Sasuke answered.

Sakura nearly snorted into her drink. Even though Tsunade wasn't here and even though Shizune was missing as well, Sakura thought she could almost imagine them here with her. Tsunade would be secretly stealing all the sake while Shizune tried her best to stop her. And at the end of the night, completely hammered, Tsunade would have wished the bride and groom her most sincere blessings. Sakura fought another fierce pang of longing- a longing to see the woman who had taught her everything. But she fought the wave of loneliness as she tilted her head to look over at Sasuke.

"Is there a point to missing the dead, Sasuke?" she abruptly questioned.

There was such a long pause that she thought Sasuke had ignored her. Or maybe he hadn't heard her properly over the noise. But then she felt his fingers tighten around hers.

"Yeah. There is," he assured her. His voice was almost swallowed in the din. But she heard him loud and clear.

* * *

><p>The weekend of her birthday, Sakura spent the days helping Sasuke move into his new home. Or maybe it was him moving back into his old home. It was hard to describe just what it was that Sasuke was doing. Ino called it "confronting his demons". When Sakura told him this, Sasuke snorted and pushed her out of the way with his hip as he brought a box into the house. She caught him by the back of his shirt when he was about to leave again.<p>

"I think she's kind of right. I'm... not a big fan of this plan, Sasuke. You don't have to do this if you're not ready," she said.

"I am," replied Sasuke without meeting her eyes. Letting out a sigh, she released his shirt.

"Really?" asked Sakura. She wasn't challenging him or threatening him. Her concern bled through into her words so that he couldn't get angry even if he tried.

"Even if I wasn't," began Sasuke as he took another step forward. He stopped in the doorway, grasping the wooden frame with one hand. When he glanced back at her, she thought she saw a smile pulling at his lips as he said, "You're here, aren't you?"

Furiously fanning herself with her hand, Sakura shoved him out of the way to go get another box of his things. Determined to block out his smug snicker, she slammed the box down on the kitchen counter to begin sorting pots and pans.

There was a lot of work to be done on the house before it was habitable. They could have just as easily called in a contractor to deal with the repairs but Sakura didn't even bother to suggest the idea. Whispers about the Uchiha district being haunted had spread throughout the village. Very few people would be willing to take the job. On top of that, Sakura didn't like the idea of strangers stomping around in their work boots all over this almost-hallowed ground. This she didn't mention to Sasuke because she, as a stranger herself, almost seemed hypocritical complaining about such a thing.

She was relatively handy with a hammer. And Sasuke had had some experience patching up fences and sheds on the few D-rank missions Team 7 had completed together in the past. Pulling up her hair into a ponytail and rolling up her sleeves, Sakura suggested that they take care of the repairs themselves. Sasuke agreed.

They scoured the outside of the building with water. Sakura scrubbed the wood until it gleamed while Sasuke patched some of the holes that had appeared in the ceiling after years of neglect. They then moved on to cleaning every room inside the house. Most of the rice paper in the sliding doors had begun to mold so they stripped that clean and built new doors. The smells of sawdust and wood stain filled every crevice of the building. They ate ramen cooked on a portable stove while they waited for the gas and electricity to be restored.

When they grew tired of brushing through cobwebs and chasing bugs out of dark crevices, they dropped their cleaning tools. Sakura pulled her bandana off her head, letting her hair fall down the back of her neck in loose curls. Hand in hand, they walked through the darkened house. And even though they had just spent the entire day ripping through all the dust, this time there was a sense that Sakura was getting a very intimate tour.

"This was my brother's room," Sasuke quietly said as they stood in the doorway.

There had been nothing in the place except a dust-filled futon and an old dresser without clothes. The next room was his parents'. Sakura knew that they had been killed there but there was no blood stain on the tatami floor. She saw the bathroom and the laundry room and the living room and the kitchen. But the last room was Sasuke's. And even though no one had died in that place, it seemed to be the most painful room in the whole house.

Sakura stared into the emptiness and she sank to her knees. There had been nothing in this room to start with. No futon and no clothes. It had probably been cleared out a long time ago- when Sasuke had moved into his own apartment as a child. But still, there were no photographs. No toys. Not one speck left behind to indicate who had once spilled their dreams into those walls.

The floor was uncomfortable. It was hard and it was a little cold in the house overall. But Sakura lay down on her back to stare up at the ceiling. And after a long moment, he let out a sigh and lay down right next to her. Their hands meshed. She felt the outlines of his calluses against her palm.

They fell asleep that way- hands squeezing together as they lay stretched out on their backs. And even though the house echoed awkwardly, squeaking and groaning in the wind, there was no loneliness inside the walls that night.

In the morning, they scrubbed the floors until they shone. They moved the furniture that had been stacked by the front door during the night. And as the empty rooms began to fill, Sakura thought she saw faint shadows of memories. Maybe a little Sasuke had run through here. Maybe it was the outline of Sasuke's mother standing at the stove. What would she be cooking? Would she smile when her sons ran in to greet her? Of course she would.

By the second night, the water and power were finally reconnected to the house. After badly-needed showers, they made soba to celebrate the move-in. And even though Sakura had brought a bottle of sake to celebrate, she barely touched the alcohol. Instead, as they sat under the kotatsu, legs tangling together, Sakura asked about Sasuke's family.

Sasuke didn't talk about his brother- for obvious reasons. But he didn't like to talk about his father either- for less obvious reasons. Instead, he spoke fondly of his mother. He remembered her cooking, her laughing smiles. He recalled the way she woke him so he wouldn't be late for class at the academy. It was remarkable how he even imitated the curve of her right hand as she washed rice in the morning. She patched up injuries and sewed patches on torn clothing. On days that he felt feverish, she would place cool cloths on his head and tell him stories of brave shinobi from the past.

Before bed, Sakura set out an offering of rice cakes at the family altar. She lit the incense and sat, as she always did, to stare at the motionless faces in the picture frames. She didn't look when Sasuke settled next to her. Sakura even managed to hold back the tender tears when Sasuke stared at his mother's face and whispered, "I'm home."

Later, she sat on the corner of Sasuke's bed, watching him as he organized the clothes in his dresser. They had moved the furniture from his apartment into here- including the western-style bed. Sakura ran her hand over the soft blue comforter.

"Do you want me to leave?" she inquired in a soft voice. The top drawer slid shut before the next one opened up.

"What?" asked Sasuke without looking up at her.

"You heard me, asshole," Sakura retorted without an ounce of venom in her voice.

"No," answered Sasuke in an equally calm tone.

"You have pajamas for me?" she then proceeded to demand. This time Sasuke straightened. He glanced over his shoulder at her.

"What makes you think you can take my clothes?" he questioned. Sakura smiled cheerfully.

"Because I'm cute. And because you think I'm cute," she promptly replied. Rolling his eyes, he turned back to the dresser. She watched him open up the third drawer and root around in it for a bit. She was prepared when clothes were thrown in her direction. Retreating into the bathroom, Sakura changed into the old t-shirt he had given up, deciding to stick with her leggings on the bottom.

She overslept. That night they talked almost until the sun was beginning to rise over the horizon. Sakura asked endlessly about his childhood- or about the good parts he wanted to remember. She wanted to know what kinds of foods his family ate, about what kinds of things he talked to his mother about. And in exchange, though Sasuke had no questions of his own, he seemed surprisingly willing to divulge. Sakura didn't complain. The affection that softened his face when he remembered his family was something that filled her chest with an indescribable warmth.

It took a long time for Sakura to finally drift off to sleep, pillowing her own hands under her cheek. And when she finally did wake, it was at nearly 10. Eyes squeezed shut, Sakura let out a deep breath.

"Shit. I'm so late," she grumbled. Sasuke grunted. After some thought, Sakura opened up her eyes and twisted to look toward the sliding door that led outside. The light that filtered in through the thin rice paper was promising. It foretold a clear and mild day.

Because she was already late, Sakura decided to teleport home to shower and to change. As she sat up, she raked her hands through the tangled mess on top of her head. Sasuke, hair ruffled but not unappealing, snorted derisively at her panic.

"When are we going to tell Naruto?" Sasuke suddenly croaked.

"Tell him what?" grumbled Sakura in return. She rubbed her eyes with the heels of her hands.

"That we're together," clarified Sasuke with a hint of exasperation. It was Sakura's turn to snort with laughter.

"Who said that we're together?" she challenged with a smug hint to her voice. Sasuke's eyes opened at this. The sepia irises that focused in on her were filled with unvoiced amusement. He rolled onto his side to face her, one arm thrown up over his head.

"You slept over," he stated. Sakura sniffed.

"My conscience is clear. I am pure," huffed Sakura in a haughty tone.

"Pure," Sasuke scoffed in a voice scratchy with the remains of sleep. Still, he caught her hand when she aimed a half-powered punch at him.

"Jerk," she remarked.

"See you for dinner?" asked Sasuke, completely ignoring her jab as she climbed out of bed. Sakura stretched her arms up high before bending over to touch her toes. She cracked a few things and flexed her fingers before she looked back at him.

"Sure," she answered. And then she disappeared in a puff of smoke to reappear in her own bedroom.

When she showed up very late at the hospital half an hour later, she received several worried looks from the nurses who asked if she was feeling well. Sakura honestly replied that she had overslept, earning a few fake scoldings and relieved giggles. But Kei and Nozomi exchanged sly smiles when they walked into her office without knocking. Arms crossed over her generous chest, Nozomi sighed dramatically.

"Hot date last night, Sensei?" Nozomi grilled her, as subtle as ever.

"I don't know. Where are the reports I asked for last week?" Sakura returned with a question of her own. That shut Nozomi up. When Kei looked ready to interject, Sakura sighed.

"And Kei, I thought I asked you to do a demonstration on how to place a chest tube for the trainees today," added Sakura. The telephone receiver was cradled against her shoulder. She was on hold and the irritating music wasn't something she particularly wanted in her ear.

The two girls stared at the Chief of Medicine who merely stared back. When Takumi walked in, he very nearly walked back out in the face of Nozomi's glare. But Sakura waved him in.

"I noticed that Sasaki-san wasn't around so I took the interns on rounds. Nara-san called about an hour ago to ask if you would be willing to give him a physical to ok him for a mission. Then I started Inoue-san on steroids to bring down the swelling," reported as he handed over his patient files for her to check. Sakura glanced through the symptoms and then his medical history just to be sure that he wasn't allergic to anything. Only then did she look at Takumi and smile.

"Personal gossip is very good but it shouldn't get in the way of your work. You can think about this when Takumi has off this Saturday and you two are covering his shift," said Sakura. And though neither Nozomi nor Kei seemed happy at the idea, they nodded obediently.

"I'm not doing this to torture you. Patients suffer when we lose focus. I need you girls to understand that," added Sakura in a gentler tone. Pouting slightly less, Nozomi bowed and then exited the office. Kei also bowed before she followed her friend out, leaving only Takumi.

"I don't need Saturday off," he remarked.

"You're only saying that because you're afraid they'll come after you to kill you," answered Sakura. Takumi nodded.

"I'll tell them not to bully you too much. You deserve a day off, though," Sakura assured him as she handed his patient files back.

Suddenly there was a voice on the other end of the line and Sakura lifted the receiver to her ear.

"This looks good. I'll be in surgery the rest of the day so I need you to head down to research and check on them for me," she instructed before responding to the voice calling through the phone.

Sakura ordered new supplies and touched base with the nurses before she retreated into the operating room to reconstruct someone's shattered ribcage. The interns watching through the glass window stared enough to make the assisting nurses and doctors grumble about being creeped out. Despite her experience, there were enough problems that when Sakura exited the OR, it was about an hour behind schedule. She quickly shed her bloody gloves and scrubs and changed into a fresh pair before heading out to the waiting room to talk to the anxious wife and son of the patient.

After a quick lunch, Sakura was back in the operating room again. This time, it was to deal with a woman dealing with seizures. She severed the connections between the left and right brain, being extra careful not to cut through a delicate nerve. Takumi assisted her on this one, handing off tools almost as she requested them and applying chakra to cauterize vessels as she worked. Sakura let Takumi deliver the good news to the parents this time. The grateful tears that streamed down the mother's face was almost enough to make Takumi cry. When he returned to her, he simply nodded and Sakura patted him on the shoulder. That was more than enough to express her pride in the boy who had once trembled with fear at putting in a needle for an IV.

Sakura clocked out at 5. She was twisting her damp hair into a bun on top of her head. Normally she avoided showering at the hospital if possible. But two surgeries in one day meant plenty of blood combining with sweat, culminating in one stinky doctor. She scrubbed out the stench with hospital soap, avoiding the interns that awkwardly attempted to make naked conversation in the communal showers. Sasuke walked into her office later, his eyes roving around in his habitual scan of any room he entered.

"I went crazy and bought a giant package of rice noodles last week. You need to help me finish them," said Sakura without greeting.

"Are you staying over tonight?" Sasuke abruptly queried.

"What?" demanded Sakura with a startled laugh. Putting her hands on her hips, she arched an eyebrow at him.

"Why? Do you have any plans?" she asked in response. But Sasuke's stare was completely serious as he observed her.

"Not particularly. I just like when you stay," he replied so honestly that she immediately felt guilty for teasing him. Feeling her cheeks warm slightly at the sheer innocence of his confession, Sakura suddenly looked away from him. As she tried to shove him out of the way, she felt his chest shake slightly under her palm. Her head whipped around so she could stare at him. A gasp parted her lips.

"You... you ASS! You totally did that on purpose just to get me embarrassed!" she exclaimed. Though Sasuke shrugged, she could see the mischief sparkling in his eyes. And she knew, without a doubt, that Uchiha Sasuke had laughed at her.

"You complete bastard. Get out of here. I'll eat dinner with Sai instead," she sniffed.

Sasuke caught her wrist.

"Don't be ridiculous. You obviously prefer me," Sasuke flatly stated as he stared down at her.

"How do you know?" Sakura bit back. Sasuke raised an eyebrow. It was Sakura's turn to fix him with a pointed look.

"Between the two of you, I don't think there's a clear winner for sparkling conversation. You're going to have to convince me of your worth, Sasuke," she drawled. Sasuke didn't seem thrown at all.

"You think I'm hotter," he immediately responded.

Sakura sagged against him as she began to laugh again. Wrapping her arms around his middle, she pretended to headbutt him.

"Arrogant," she chuckled.

"Crazy," he solemnly replied.


	17. Gladiolus

This is the final chapter of a story that has gone on for such a strangely long time. This started off as an experiment in character development and I honestly didn't expect for it to be received so warmly. Thank you to everyone for reading and reviewing through all this time. The ending is a little ambiguous and there definitely won't be a sequel, but I think that's what works for these two.

* * *

><p><span>Entropy<span>

Chapter 17: Gladiolus

Around the time spring really began to warm the earth, Sakura always took off a day to tend to her garden. Normally the dormant roots to the previous year's plants merely lay sleeping in the cooled soil. But last spring there had been no time to tend to them. The year before that, she had been up north on her rotation. Most of the plants had died without proper care and weeds had swallowed up the remaining ones. The shriveled remains of the garden had decomposed underneath the melting snow until their nutrients seeped back into the soil.

Pulling on some old clothes she didn't mind getting dirty, she tamed her hair into a quick fishtail braid and headed out to her front yard. Sakura yanked out the weeds and broke up the clods of soil. She poked holes in the dirt to plant the little seedlings. As each little plant was placed in the soft bed, Sakura mentally made note of each variety. Sweet marjoram was good for its antifungal properties while sage was used for cooking and for its anti-inflammatory effects. Brightly colored poppies were also included for their ability to tranquilize. In the stretch of soil edging the fence, she planted plenty of jasmine tobacco. The sweet-smelling clusters of white flowers would sprout out in long stalks that swayed in the winds that came at the tail end of spring. She liked their star-shaped blooms but, more importantly, the leaves could be mashed up to relieve skin inflammations and even draw out the poison from bug bites. There were other varieties of flora scattered around- each with its own set of unique medicinal properties. Sakura had memorized all of these things and could sometimes identify the flower by its smell alone.

For lunch she heated up some leftovers in the microwave, washing her hands and face in warm water as she waited. And later, when she grew tired of spreading out fertilizer, she curled up with a beer on a warm spot in the sun to enjoy the gentle breeze. It was still a little too cool to really enjoy the weather fully, but she pushed her shoes off to dig her toes into the soft blades of grass. The whisper of the wind against the leaves was calming enough to lull her into an unexpected nap.

Sakura woke up to a sudden chill. Her eyes lazily peeled open to find Sasuke standing over her, blocking the sun.

"What an easy life you have, napping like a cat. You didn't go to the hospital today?" he said. The rays of light slanted off the sides of his head. They turned the edges of his hair dark blue. And the shadows darkened his expression until all she could see were his eyes with the edges turning slightly downwards to accompany his smirk.

"Today was gardening day," she responded. As she sat up, she shook loose tendrils of her hair out of her face. Sasuke crouched down in front of her. He reached out to rub at a smudge of dirt next to her eye. Then his fingers travelled down to grasp a lock of her hair that had come loose from the twist.

"I need a haircut," Sakura remarked as she watched his movements. Sasuke made a noncommittal noise.

"It's gotten pretty long. You used to keep it short. It was about your resolve to be real kunoichi, right?" answered Sasuke. It wasn't really a question. They both knew that. A mischievous smile curled up the edges of Sakura's mouth. She could see the wariness in his gaze in response.

"You know, when we were little, someone started a rumor that you liked girls with long hair. Truth?" she queried. With a sigh, Sasuke sat on the grass across from her. When he didn't immediately answer, Sakura nudged his leg with her toe.

"I had no interest in girls back then- long hair or short hair," Sasuke told her. Sakura let out a short laugh.

"Yeah. Something about all-consuming desire for vengeance does that to you," she retorted. Sasuke flicked her knee with his pointer finger and thumb. A scowl crossed Sakura's face. She leaned back on her hands and slung her calves across his thighs. Letting her feet dangle idly by his back, she fixed him with a pointed look.

"So really? No preference? Even Sai has one," Sakura grilled. Sasuke's eyebrows rose with clear curiosity.

"Long. He think it looks elegant," clarified Sakura. Sasuke pondered this before he gave a sort of shrug.

"I… honestly don't care. You look fine with short or long so it doesn't matter," Sasuke finally admitted. She could see that the open honesty was still difficult for him. And she felt a little guilty for teasing him so much over tiny things like this all the time. Ino always assured her that it was the right thing to do. But then again, Ino, in their youth, had once strongly advised Sakura to always snoop through her boyfriend's things. Perhaps Ino wasn't a well of absolute truths.

Satisfied, Sakura nodded before she let her arms relax and she lay back down again. The sweet fragrance of the grass filled her nose each time she inhaled.

"Gardening?" she heard Sasuke ask. Nodding, she lifted an arm to point vaguely in the direction of the house.

"Sage, blackberries, sweet marjoram," listed Sakura. Then she gestured more in the direction of the front gate, "Jasmine tobacco, poppies." As her pointing finger moved, she rattled off the names. Even though her eyes were focused on the light-blue sky overhead, she knew that Sasuke was staring at the little mounds of dirt that sometimes had tiny green leaves poking up from them. Other piles cradled seeds in their damp soil. Those little pods would eventually crack open as a tiny shoot crawled its way to the surface. Life would burst up from the dark brown beds of plain dirt. In a few weeks, the fragrance of flowers would begin to filter up. By the beginning of summer, the front yard was always a pleasant mélange of sweet smells.

"What about that spot on the side?" Sasuke pressed. She rose on her elbows to see that he was looking at the raised humps of dirt edging the walkway.

"Gladioli. They represent infatuation and strength," she sighed as she sank back down. Her eyes fluttered shut as the sun emerged from a swath of clouds and shone into her face. Soaking in the warmth, she took a deep breath.

"Ino told me that your garden always smells nice. What do those smell like?"

His voice was gentle, matching with the rhythm of the swaying branches and rippling grasses. Her hands rose as she traced the imaginary shapes of the blooming gladioli. They had long stems, with the flowers cascading down the length and all pointing up toward the sun. The delicate petals wrinkled and folded together like bunches of coral-colored fabric.

"They don't smell like anything," she admitted.

"Hm," Sasuke replied. She listened to his back hit the grass too.

"Doesn't that make them pointless?" he asked after a while.

"I just like them. That's all. That's good enough," she told him. Turning her cheek to press to the ground, she aimed a little kick toward his middle. There was a faint "oof" that told her that her heel had connected with his stomach.

"Don't insult my flowers, jerk," she added.

Her eyes flew open when Sasuke sat up and tossed her legs aside. He grabbed her around the middle before falling backward, pulling her down with him. A gasping laugh burst from her mouth as he rolled over, pinning her beneath him. The grass tickled her neck and arms. His fingers splayed across her back, warm against her cool skin. Sakura pressed a kiss to the side of Sasuke's neck, just to see him bristle at the unexpected sensation. And even though he could see that she was laughing at his reaction, he let it go with a little shake of his head.

* * *

><p>The new batch of interns had gone through their full year of training. There had been many new faces this year- a common occurrence after eager children saw the horrors of war and resolved to develop a noble heart to heal others. But the truth was that many of them had given up in the middle. And when it was time for Sakura and Takumi to select the medics from their ranks, they chose less than the normal 10. When the desperate ones asked why there were four spots left unfilled, Sakura shook her head.<p>

"You aren't ready," she simply said.

The six new members of the staff were welcomed warmly. Two she recommended immediately to the ANBU division of medics where they would be trained both in medicine and in physical skills needed like stealth and speed. One went to pediatrics; one went to endocrinology. The remaining two she handed over to a colleague where they would be brought up as physicians.

"You didn't pick a favorite this year, Sensei," Takumi noted over lunch.

"I know," she responded. But no one had caught her eye from this batch. She couldn't help but notice how happy Takumi looked. She reached out to pinch his cheek.

"I guess you'll have to endure being my favorite again this year, Takumi," she added.

A week later, they held the written examinations to begin selecting their new interns. As Kei had suggested, they only chose the 25 best scores from this pool instead of the normal 50. Sakura noticed that many of the interns rejected from the previous year did not show up to take the test again. Then again, she hadn't expected them to. She let Takumi, Kei, and Nozomi handle the grading and selection while she caught up on administrative work for the hospital.

When the report landed on her desk containing the names and profiles of all the new interns, Sakura leafed through it with a sigh. She marked a couple profiles with a red pen before handing it back to Takumi.

"Keep an eye on these ones. They look promising," she told him. And then she stood, hands slipping into the pockets of her white coat, to go speak to the lucky ones who had passed the initial selection for the first time. Her three students trailed after the sounds of her heels on the polished hospital tiles. Sakura passed the nurse's station and cut past the OR, heading downstairs to the lecture hall. She opened both the doors at once, walking in without saying a word. Nozomi and Kei let the doors slam loudly behind them. They did this every year- claiming that the dramatic sound was a nice touch to the scary Chief of Medicine image. There were panicked shushing noises as she stopped in the exact center of the floor and turned to face the bewildered faces.

"Congratulations. Out of the many applicants we've had this year, you're the 25 that have made it past the initial testing," Sakura announced. She cast a sweeping glance around the room to gauge the faces she saw looking back at her.

"My name is Doctor Haruno Sakura. I am your Chief of Medicine," added Sakura. There were no shocked faces in response to that fact. She delved into her usual speech that highlighted the importance of medics and how they were the elite of the elite. But she kept her words brief and dismissed the students after a few minutes. Kei shepherded them out of the room for a tour of the building while Nozomi tagged along just for the fun of it. When Takumi glanced unsurely from his friends and then back to his teacher, Sakura laughed a little.

"Come on. I'm removing a tumor today. You've always said you wanted to assist on one of those," said Sakura. Excitement lit up Takumi's entire face at those words. Sakura never grew tired of seeing that pure joy brightening his expressions. She silently hoped that he would never lose that wonder. That was sometimes the only thing that dragged her to work when she grew tired of seeing the pain and death that pooled in the hospital like dirty water in a dead leaf.

The hospital wasn't any less busy for Sakura. Though the aftershocks of war had largely dispersed and all the staff was now home, the administrative work did tend to bog Sakura down. Sometimes she sat for several minutes at her desk, glaring at the stacks of forms in her inbox, as if she could combust them through vengeful looks alone. But the faster she finished those, the faster she could go treat patients, which was how she forced herself to finish that hated part of her job each day.

The sick and injured continued to flow into the hospital while the healed streamed out. The only difference was that the anxiety of conflict was gone. Sakura had almost forgotten what peace and ease looked like. On the odd occasion that she made up some excuse to go snoop through the Hokage's archives, Sakura saw that the atmosphere of the Hokage's Tower had also changed. The brisk strides of messenger's delivering updates from the battlefield had softened into the leisurely gait of employees off to fetch coffee or scrolls. Even the guards were more relaxed. And though Naruto always joked that he would have to punish the slackers, they both knew he was relieved that people were beginning to smile once more.

Sakura didn't bring up Tsunade in front of Naruto again. Sometimes she would turn her head just in time to catch his unguarded looks. And she would know that Naruto was thinking about the old woman too, probably along with Jiraiya. Naruto was her brother. He was her best friend. And yet that was a topic they couldn't broach. Neither of them fully understood why so they couldn't put a name to those reasons.

Naruto feared hurting Sakura with the reminder of that loss while Sakura feared distracting Naruto from his job with feelings of grief. And in a way, not talking about the pain softened it more quickly. Tsunade's death faded into an ache that was always there but not so debilitating. And after years had passed, after time had healed that wound, only then could Sakura think back to the wonderful woman without a stab of fresh pain.

Because the Hokage generally didn't sit around twiddling his thumbs, Sakura was more comfortable dropping in on Intelligence to bother people there whenever she wasn't at work or not researching at home. They were equally occupied but their work came in waves. There were days that weren't as busy and then there were days where new information came in and everyone scrambled to work through field reports and sources. On the quiet days, Sakura swung by and no one ever complained. Her main target: Uchiha Sasuke- without a doubt. But Shikamaru and Ino were there too. They were also glad to see Sakura visit.

"You look completely different when you get a decent amount of sleep," Shikamaru commented one day. Sakura shook her head.

"Suave," she snorted.

"What're you doing here? Shouldn't you be giving sponge baths to the old or something?" teased Ino as she walked up to join them.

"It's my day off, rude lady. And sponge baths I leave to the interns," retorted Sakura while folding her arms across her chest. They lingered to exchange a few more joking barbs before Sakura pointed toward the hallway.

"Is he busy?" she inquired.

"Probably not. He might be in a bad mood though," Shikamaru sighed. He stretched his arms over his head as his words tapered off in a yawn. Ino nodded solemnly. Sakura raised an eyebrow.

"He and Ino went out during lunch to go pick up food for us. On the way some old lady slapped him," drawled Shikamaru.

"She was all, 'How dare you set foot in our village? You're a traitor! An animal! My son died fighting for this village and how dare you wear that headband mehmehmehmeh'," Ino mocked in a high-pitched voice. Her upper lip curled. Sakura's gut clenched so hard that she began to feel sick. Her head turned back in the direction of the hallway.

"Luckily Ino told her to shut up. I'm glad he wasn't out on his own. He doesn't deserve to hear that crap after all he's done for Konoha…" added Shikamaru. When Sakura turned back to him, she saw the sympathy flickering in his dark eyes. Laying her hand on his arm, Sakura gave him a wan smile.

And then she was walking down that narrow hall, her heels clicking in a lonely echo against the click-clack of typewriters from some of the rooms. Her fingertips rested on Sasuke's door for a moment. She peered in through the narrow rectangle of the window and saw his dark head of hair bent over a book on his desk. She knew that he felt her presence there already so she entered without knocking. The door swung shut behind her as she took slow steps up to the desk.

"It's too early for you to come demanding dinner," Sasuke remarked without looking up. Sakura leaned against the wall beside her, her hands folded behind her back. She waited patiently for him to finish his page and to place a bookmark in it before he shut the dusty tone. A cloud of dust rose up that he waved away in a careless sweep of his hand. When he finally looked up at her, she could feel the angry tears pricking at her eyes.

"You let an old lady hit you," she said with a calmness she didn't feel. The corner of Sasuke's mouth quirked upward.

"She had a strong arm," he answered.

She took a step toward him. When she reached for his face, he softly pushed her hand away.

"I'm fine," he insisted.

"Look me in the eyes and say that," Sakura demanded. Her hands were fisted at her sides as she stared at his cheek. It was red and she could see a little scratch near the corner of his mouth from a nail. It was only when Sasuke grasped her forearm that she realized that she was physically shaking with anger.

"I'm fine," he repeated, staring up at her with a completely unconvincing smile. But she smiled too, tears welling over as her mouth stretched. She stood stiffly, hands still clenched as angry tears rolled down her cheeks.

"I'll find that old bitch and I'll punch her in the mouth," she sniffed. Taking a big breath, she hiccupped without meaning to. Sasuke let out a short snort of laughter.

"With that face? Terrifying," he answered.

"Shut up!" she snapped back.

"You would kill her. It wouldn't look good for the Chief of Medicine to go around murdering old ladies," he added.

"How could you let someone do this to your face?" Sakura suddenly raged. This time she grabbed his chin, roughly tilting his head so she could get a better look at his cheek. She placed her hand on his face, trying to imagine what angle the slap would have hit him at. The skin was a little warm and maybe his face was a little swollen. Blowing out a deep breath, she channeled chakra to her palm to quickly erase the pain.

"Are you alright?" she quietly asked once her chakra dissipated.

"Yes," he said.

There was a lengthy pause. Sakura carefully examined his expression before she spoke again.

"Do you need a hug?" she queried.

"No," he said in the same calm voice.

But when Sakura wound her arms around his shoulders anyway, he didn't protest. With his cheek pressed to her stomach, Sasuke tilted his head to peer up at her with a strangely placid expression. His arms hung loosely at his sides.

"I didn't know her son. I didn't kill him," Sasuke remarked in a muted voice after a long time. Sakura's arms tightened.

"I know," she answered, "But sometimes it's easier to have someone to blame for all the hurt. Anger is a lot easier to handle than pain."

Ino, staring in at them through the window, felt shame flood her cheeks in a hot blush. She had snuck over with the intention of catching the two of them being naughty. Bursting in, she would make obnoxious comments until Sasuke was glaring holes into the floor and Sakura was laughing despite her irritation. But upon peeking in through that narrow rectangle of glass in the door, Ino immediately felt that she was intruding on something that went beyond intimate.

Sakura's hand was on Sasuke's cheek. The door was thick enough that sound didn't travel through it. Ino watched Sakura's lips move before Sasuke seemed to grunt something in response. A smile pulled at Sakura's mouth before she leaned in to press her forehead to Sasuke's while her eyes fluttered shut. Her mouth moved in slow, deliberate words. And for some reason, Sasuke's closed too as he listened. Ino had the sense that she was intruding upon some sort of ritual- a sacred thing that the two of them shared. That was why when she felt a tap on her shoulder, she instinctively whirled around and angled her body to block the window.

"Hey, Ino, you mind moving? I need to give Uchiha these files," one of her coworkers said.

"I'll take them. He's busy right now and I'm waiting to talk to him anyway," Ino quickly insisted, snatching the folder from him. There was an awkward moment where her eyes shifted uneasily back and forth. But then he shrugged.

"Sure. Thanks, I guess," he easily responded before walking off.

"What the hell am I so embarrassed for?" Ino muttered to herself as she stared down at the file in her arms. She laughed at herself a little.

Sakura owed her one.

Though in that moment, Ino fully intended to hold this over her friend's head, something changed her mind. Instead she found a way to quickly hand Sasuke the file without pausing to jab teasingly at Sakura.

Ino's actions were unnecessary, though. It became an unspoken truth around the Intelligence Division that Haruno Sakura was no longer to be flirted with. A building filled with exceptionally observant people was bound to notice the changes that overcame Sakura. Most noticeable was the fact that she no longer palled around with the single men. They had always flirted harmlessly; she let them talk but always rejected them. It was a long-standing tradition that when it faded, was easily noted. This was coupled with the definite change in her aura.

"What're you even talking about?" Sakura laughed it off when it was mentioned to her.

"I haven't changed at all," she chuckled. But everyone rolled their eyes at each other and decided to let the subject drop. There was no use in trying to say something to a person who just wasn't listening.

When Ino recounted all of these observations to Sakura's apprentice one day as she went to return some borrowed files, Takumi let out an exasperated noise.

"Not to mention their mirroring," he sighed. Then he turned his attention to thumbing through the folder to make sure that nothing was missing. But Ino's gaze sharpened as she tried to understand the comment.

"Mirroring?" Ino repeated.

"Mirroring. The behavior when people that are interacting copy one another. You and Sensei do it too," said Takumi without looking up. Only when Ino didn't move did Takumi realize just how interested she was in what he had to say. He lifted his head to meet Ino's questioning gaze.

"Like when you and Sensei are talking, you'll cross your arms if hers are crossed. Or when you're walking together, you start walking at the same pace. It's very common among close friends," he explained. Ino's eyes narrowed. She had never studied psychology during her time in medicine. Since she could just dive straight into someone's brain, using science to try to understand the human mind had never seemed so important to her. But clearly Sakura's apprentice had been hitting the psychology textbooks.

"And in the case of Sensei and Uchiha-san, it's even more severe," sighed Takumi. As he spoke, he gestured for Ino to turn around. They both turned in time to see a familiar figure entering the lobby. Sakura, standing at the reception desk with a cup of coffee, continued writing something on a clipboard while a nurse spoke to her. Sasuke strode across the lobby with even steps, coming to a stop several feet away from Sakura. He observed her for a long moment until she finally finished writing with a grand scribble of her signature on the bottom right of the form.

"Here you go. Send this up to cardiology and they'll take care of it," Sakura said while handing the clipboard to the nurse. Only then did she turn around to face her visitor. She stared at him for a couple seconds before holding her cup out to him.

"You look like you could use it. Long day?" she uttered. Sasuke stepped forward and accepted the beverage. Sakura turned to her side, leaning on the reception desk with one elbow as she watched him drink. Sasuke finished off the bitter coffee without complaint. The beans the hospital used always tasted faintly burnt but it was the kind of taste that assured the drinker that the caffeine would kick in soon. He set the mug on the counter and then nodded.

"We've been processing scout reports since yesterday. You'd think that once we cut off Danzo's head, we'd have less enemies to worry about," remarked Sasuke with a dry chuckle. A wry smile pulled at Sakura's mouth. She crossed her arms over her chest.

"Having a common enemy creates a lot of temporary truces. Once that enemy is gone, the truces end too," Sakura agreed.

When Sasuke moved to cross his arms over his chest too, Takumi nudged Ino's arm to point it out.

"I ran into your mother in the market today," Sasuke told her. Surprise widened Sakura's eyes. Her arms fell to her sides.

"Did she ask if you were eating?" she guessed with a sympathetic grimace.

"And if my new house was alright. My health, my job- it's like she was going down a checklist," he admitted. His arms lowered.

"Don't worry. She's like that with Sai and Naruto too," laughed Sakura.

From a distance, Ino and Takumi stood observing them as if they were two scientists observing wild animals.

"Huh, you're right," Ino said after a while. She watched Sakura shift her weight to her left leg. It didn't take long for Sasuke to do the same. And when Sasuke leaned his head in closer to say something, Sakura copied him. She laughed loudly, eyes sparkling as she stared up at him.

"So are they official yet?" queried Takumi. Ino shook her head.

"I don't know what the hell they are. All I know is that I haven't seen her laugh like that in a really long time," answered Ino, followed by a fond smile.

* * *

><p>"Hey, listen to this," Sakura said one night as she lay on her stomach on her sofa. She nudged Sasuke's shoulder with her elbow until he let out a long sigh and then leaned back to look at her. He was sitting on the floor in front of the sofa. A roll of thick cloth was spread across the coffee table. His kunai and shuriken were laid on top of the fabric, waiting their turn to be sharpened and polished. A thick science book lay open on the sofa in front of Sakura. Her ankles crossed in the air, keeping freshly-painted toenails from smudging. The bright teal stood out against her pale skin.<p>

"I found this old physics textbook in the library yesterday. Listen to this," she said. Her pointer finger trailed down the page until she found the spot she had marked with a dot of her green pen.

"Entropy is a measure of the disorder of any system. The world that we perceive to be stable and unchanging is actually made up of tiny parts that are constantly in motion," Sakura read out loud. She then skimmed further down the lines to add, "Simply put, entropy is the measure of chaos."

When she looked up at Sasuke, he didn't say anything.

"Isn't that a little poetic? There's the idea that nothing is really unchanging. Everything is moving. That kind of blows my mind," she said. Medicine had always been her passion but the intricacies of the physics and chemistry she had learned early in her career had always been fascinating too. There was an invisible world that was either too big for her to perceive or too small for her to notice.

"It's a little frightening, actually," replied Sasuke after a long pause.

"That means that nothing is stable. The world that you just described thrives on disorder, not logic," he went on to explain himself. Sakura's eyes glittered as she suddenly sat up.

"I know! So that means that in this random, scary, weird world, all of us just happened to come together. The universe kind of smashed us together and we became the way we are," she insisted. It took Sasuke a while to understand what she was saying. Leave it to Sakura to be able to put a positive twist on anything. Sasuke shook his head.

"Your optimism is frightening," he remarked.

Sakura gave him a smug look.

"That's right. Tremble before my awesome optimism," she said with a snooty air. Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"I think it's your fists- not your optimism- that makes people tremble," he pointed out. Sakura looked torn between laughing and scowling. In the end, she scoffed. Picking up her heavy book, she flopped onto her back and placed it on top of her face.

"Fine. You're clearly an uneducated barbarian incapable of appreciating science," concluded Sakura. She laid back down on the sofa to resume her reading.

But the next night, when Sai came over to return a set of her shuriken that had somehow gotten mixed up with his during the move, he saw her book left open to that same passage.

"Entropy?" he read out loud, eyebrows rising, "The measure of chaos?"

"You can borrow that if you like- maybe for some light reading?" Sakura teased as she entered the living room with tea. She handed him a mug before sitting down on the sofa beside him. The sweet fragrance of orange wafted up from the warm beverage. Cupping her hands around her drink, Sakura inhaled deeply. She stopped before taking a sip when she felt Sai's stare on the side of her face.

"What?" she asked.

"You're happy," Sai stated. Sakura waited for the rest of the sentence to follow but there was none. Blowing out a deep breath, Sakura set her mug down. Tucking her legs underneath her, she turned to the side to look at him.

"Yeah, I am. Why are you saying that like it's a bad thing?" she questioned. Sai didn't say anything but his eyes pointedly trailed to the two empty wine glasses she hadn't cleaned up from the night before. And even without that, there were so many hints around her house to testify to the fact that someone else frequented it. There was an extra pair of men's sandals in her shoe rack that Sasuke left there in case he ever needed them. A few of his clothes had migrated into her closet and some of hers had found a home in his closet too. There was a second toothbrush in the cup on the sink. There were two towels hanging on the rack in the bathroom instead of one.

"I don't want him to hurt you, Sakura. I care about you," Sai bluntly stated. Despite the absurd lack of tact, Sakura found herself smiling fondly at him.

"Despite you being an absolute freak, I care about you too, Sai," Sakura replied. And then her expression sobered.

"But it isn't your job to protect me. I'm a big girl. I don't need you to fight my battles for me," she added in a softer voice. Sai's brow furrowed.

"He might hurt you. My opinion of him has improved significantly but I cannot guarantee with confidence that things will go well for you," admitted Sai. Sakura rolled her eyes. She put her hand on his shoulder to give him a little shove.

"Here's the thing, genius. That's true about all relationships- romantic or not," Sakura laughed. There was a long pause before Sai spoke again. Something soft lingered in his gaze as he looked at her.

"Everything is changing. Naruto is married. You're… involved or whatever you'll call it," Sai trailed off, leaving an implicit statement about himself. Sakura felt a small part of her heart break as she finally realized what this was all about. Because yes, there was a part of Sai set against Sasuke because he believed he might hurt her again. But there was another more vulnerable part of him.

Sai had no family. And unlike Naruto, he didn't have a big group of friends to make a surrogate family growing up. And now that Naruto was married, he had a wife- he finally had a real family of his own. As Sakura processed these things, she finally realized that it wasn't really distrust or jealousy that plagued Sai.

She then leaned forward to press her forehead to his.

"Sai, I promise, no matter what happens, I will never leave you behind. You will always be precious to me. You will never be forgotten," she said.

A tentative smile slowly curled Sai's mouth.

* * *

><p>When Sakura told her parents that she was bringing her boyfriend for dinner one night, they didn't even have the decency to pretend to be surprised. Hisako calmly asked if Sasuke had a favorite food he wanted to eat while Yuusuke asked them to bring a bottle of wine. The meal was a pleasant affair. Sakura's parents watched Sasuke with perhaps a touch more curiosity but they didn't pry. And when it was time for them to leave that night, Hisako graced Sasuke with a hug.<p>

"You're always welcome here, Sasuke-kun," Hisako promised. Sakura didn't think her mother understood just how much those words meant to him.

But once Sakura's parents knew, it didn't take long for the rest of the village gossips to figure out what was going on.

Sakura very quickly realized that people always assumed things about her relationship with Sasuke. They assumed Sakura was a martyr or a selfless angel. Those who didn't see Sasuke as a traitor saw him as wounded. And in a way, they were all wrong.

Some nights Sasuke woke in a cold sweat, teeth chattering. Flashes of his smiling brother with those black sclera and cracking skin haunted him. He saw his parents splayed across the tatami with sticky blood gathering in a puddle. Madara grinned at him with eyeballs swiveling around in his mouth instead of teeth. Clenching his jaw to quiet his gasping breaths, he curled into himself, trying to block out the ugliness of his own memories. And his panting and shivering eventually woke Sakura.

Bone-weary from a day at the hospital, she roused in a slurred voice to stroke his shoulders- to call his name until he remembered where he was. She rose on her elbow to look at him. The startling red of his bloodline trait flared wildly until his eyes could finally focus in on her face in the darkened room. Her hair fell around him in loose curls. It lay like a curtain that smelled like flowers across his arms and face, shielding him from whatever ugly horrors lurked in his mind. She pressed her cheek to his arm, watching silently as his breathing began to even out.

His shaking slowly subsided and then the red faded from his stare, melding back into the warm brown she remembered. Wrapping her arms around his middle, she wormed her way under his arm to lie on his chest. And Sakura pressed herself close to him and held him while they slowly drifted back to sleep.

But other nights, it was Sakura that jolted awake. Shapeless faces and disjointed names floated around. She dreamt of the morgue and of fading backs that became smoke under her reaching fingers. Dead people screamed for her and blamed her for letting them fall. And if she happened to jolt awake when Sasuke had risen to go to the bathroom or get a drink of water, a cold fear seized her heart. A sudden terror that she had been abandoned again consumed her until her breathing came in shallow gasps. Her fingers clenched tightly into the sheets as she stared around as bewildered as a lost child.

Only when Sasuke stumbled in with his hair sticking up in all directions could she catch her breath again. The guilt he felt shone brightly in his eyes because he knew exactly what she was feeling. He knew it was his fault. And Sakura didn't lie to spare his feelings. The terror that he would one day disappear was something she wouldn't lie about. Hands gently cradling her head and trailing through her hair, Sasuke would hold her that way long after his arm had fallen asleep.

Sakura couldn't cut apples for them after meals. Sasuke would watch her carefully stripping the red peel away with a knife before sectioning off the fruit into crescent-shaped slices. And they both knew he would remember that afternoon in the hospital after Chunin exams. Him, bitter with rage and ingratitude, had coldly flung aside the apples she had cut for him. And Sakura, with her tender heart and softer eyes, had felt part of her innocent love wither a little.

"You stared at me like I had cut you," he admitted one night as they lay side by side on the floor with a glass bowl filled with wasabi peas.

"It was painful. You should have cut me. It would have hurt less," she answered.

Her honesty wounded him but she knew that a lie would hurt him worse. He pressed kisses to her palms, her wrists, and her shoulders. He touched his lips to her cheek and buried his face in the crook of her neck with his arms wound tight around her.

Who was being comforted and who was doing the comforting wasn't exactly clear.

Out of the blue, he sometimes said, "I'm sorry."

If anyone else happened to be around, it would be confusing. It was a drifting apology that floated without purpose. But it only mattered that Sakura understood.

"I know," she answered. And she took that small sentence, swallowed it whole, and let it patch up a small piece of her heart.

It wasn't just the words that she felt the apology in. Whenever he visited her at the hospital to watch her work without saying anything, she could feel the unvoiced words. Or after making love, he laid his chin on her stomach to stare up at her with wondering eyes and she would hear his "I'm sorry" when he hadn't said a word. His hands found hers in the dark when they walked through the village streets and she would feel the cracks in her heart begin to fill in.

"Are things alright between you two… after all of that?" Ino tentatively asked one night over coffee and tiramisu. Her spoon hit the side of the cup as she stirred the sugar in. The surface of the drink slowly changed from black to a color closer to gold. Whenever the light hit it right, the diamond on Ino's finger glittered brightly.

"Definitely not," Sakura promptly said. Ino raised an eyebrow.

"We'll be alright eventually," Sakura clarified when she noticed the quizzical look. A smile curled Ino's lips as she lifted the coffee to drink.

"You know, Chouji's convinced that you're the normal one. I'm pretty sure you make me look sane, Forehead," remarked Ino. Sakura didn't bother to look offended.

"Oh, obviously," she agreed.

Sakura slapped Ino's hand away when it began inching toward her slice of cake.

* * *

><p>Sasuke resigned from his job at Intelligence. The news came so suddenly that Naruto nearly choked on the piece of pork he had been enjoying so vigorously just seconds before. Sasuke slid a glass of water across the table to him as Sakura patted him on the back. Sasuke patiently watched Naruto drink and clear his throat.<p>

"You what?" Sakura demanded as Naruto set down his chopsticks.

"I handed in my resignation today," Sasuke repeated with the same blasé expression.

"Why? Was something wrong? Did something happen?" she questioned. But a careful look at Sasuke revealed no turmoil in his expression. Then a thought occurred to her- spurred on by a faint memory of something he had said months before.

"Are you thinking of becoming ANBU?" Sakura ventured.

"I want to be a Jounin," said Sasuke.

"You _are_ a Jounin, Sasuke-kun," she answered, pretending not to understand what he meant. Sasuke saw right through her.

Naruto sat across from him with an intense expression crinkling his face. Beside him, Sai was also watching carefully without saying anything. He turned toward Naruto with an expectant expression. But the Hokage simply raised his hands in a gesture of innocence.

"I had nothing to do with this," Naruto insisted with a furtive look at Sakura. But his worries were for nothing. Sakura barely glanced his way.

"I'm sure Uchih- Sasuke-san has his reasons. From what I've heard, your coworkers didn't despise you," Sai spoke up. Sakura and Naruto exchanged exasperated looks at this.

"_Thank you_, Sai. Silver-tongued as always," Naruto sighed.

"I think what Sai means is that you got along really well with your coworkers. And you said that you liked the work you were doing. So what is it?" Sakura translated with a pointed look at Sai.

There was a loaded pause. Sasuke looked around the table, gaze lingering particularly long on Sakura. But the moment his eyes connected with Naruto, a sort of unspoken understanding passed between them. Leaning back in his chair, Naruto let out a heavy sigh.

"Sai, take Sakura-chan home. I have to talk to Sasuke," Naruto suddenly announced. And the authority in his voice choked Sakura's angry protest in her throat. Eyes shining with unvoiced concerns, Sakura stared at Naruto. She was comforted by what she saw in his face. Pursing her lips, Sakura rose to her feet. The wooden legs of the chair scraped across the floor with her movement. She placed money on the table and then ducked under the plastic flaps to leave the restaurant. Sai tossed money out too and then followed her with one worried glance thrown back at the two still sitting at the table.

Naruto waited for several minutes before he said anything. And before he did, he poured some sake for the both of them. They clinked glasses together before they drank. With the warm burn of the sake running into his stomach, Naruto scrutinized Sasuke.

"So… spill. What's this really about?" demanded Naruto.

"I feel restless. I'm always in the village. I need to get out," Sasuke slowly said. Naruto frowned.

"Is it Sakura-chan? Does she have anything to do with this?" Naruto asked. Sasuke shook his head.

"But she'll think it's her fault and you don't want her to feel bad," Naruto concluded. The Hokage's sigh was heavy with sympathy. He reached out and patted Sasuke on the shoulder one.

"Alright, man. Do what makes you happy. But tell Sakura-chan the truth. You'll hurt her if you keep this from her," Naruto said as he got to his feet.

Later that night, much later, when even the late-night bars had closed their doors and gone to bed, Sakura heard a tap on her window. She sat up, sleepily rubbing her eyes. She had fallen asleep while reading up on autoimmune disorders. Part of her had been waiting for Sasuke to show up- though she would never admit it out loud. Before she could react, the window opened up and Sasuke slipped inside. He smelled like cool night air as he wrapped her up in his arms. The sudden affection startled Sakura. But still in a daze from her accidental nap, she didn't do anything more than call his name.

"I want to be a Jounin again. I need the missions. I'm going to choke to death if I'm in this village all the time," he whispered against her ear.

It was Sasuke's turn to feel surprised as Sakura let out a deep sigh.

"I get it," she whispered back.

The paperwork for Sasuke's transfer was processed in a couple days. Right after, Sasuke took an A-rank mission that took him up to a frozen town in the north.

So with Sasuke gone, Sakura found herself feeling a little lost for the first time in a while. She had gotten spoiled, she realized. Every night, having someone waiting for her had become such an obvious thing that she had forgotten that things hadn't always been this way. It became clear to her that she had to relearn how to be on her own again.

At first, the emptiness of her house had scared Sakura a little. But gradually she began to enjoy the occasional absences- not because he wasn't there- but because of the immense relief she felt whenever he did come home. The first time Sasuke came home from a mission, he found her curled up in his bed with one of his shirts under her cheek as a pillow. She woke with a sleepy smile and a kiss and that was the moment Sasuke realized what it meant to say "I'm home" with sincerity for the first time since he had been a child running into his mother's arms.

* * *

><p>On a warm April night, Sakura leaned back in her chair and spun around to look out at the sleeping city. She had opened the windows to let in the fresh air during the day. The vertical blinds were pulled off to the side and occasionally clattered against each other whenever the wind blew hard enough. The brittle snap of the plastic hitting itself was almost like the hospital's version of wind chimes. She spun around again to listen to the small creak of her chair.<p>

Leaning forward, she placed her weight on her forearms. The surface of the desk was cool against her skin. For once, her inbox wasn't full. There weren't patient files stacked on her desk that needed to be checked on. No desperate interns were clawing at her door, begging for help. Nozomi and Kei were sleeping safely at home. Takumi was in charge of the night shift today in the ER so Sakura knew she could relax.

5 pm was when she should have clocked out. She had arrived at the hospital at 8 am, gone through the usual rounds, and then gone into surgery a couple times. None of those things was out of the ordinary. She had finished her paperwork on time too. But when the time to clock out came, Sakura let it pass and instead took a nap in the on-call room.

With a sigh, Sakura slipped her feet into the shoes she had abandoned under her desk. As she eased her white coat off her shoulders, she picked up the scrap of paper on her desk. It had arrived several hours ago, carried by a hawk that flew up straight to her office window and pecked at the glass to be let in. Sakura hadn't recognized it from the rookery. It took her a second to notice the collar around its neck with the Uchiha fan hanging from it in a simple charm. Sometimes she forgot that Sasuke could summon hawks too.

It was a simple note, comprised of just a few sentences. Sasuke told her that he was home from his mission. That he was safe. And that he was going to take a long nap.

Nothing else was written on the paper, but Sakura knew an invitation to come over when she saw it. Setting the message aside, Sakura had sent the bird out the window, watching it curve sharply to the right in the direction of the Uchiha district.

That had been around 2 in the afternoon. It was near midnight now. Sakura wondered if Sasuke was still sleeping. He probably wouldn't have bothered to eat dinner if he still was. She didn't always know what his missions entailed, but they took a lot out of him. Whenever Sasuke came back from one, he slept for close to a solid 12 hours before functioning normally again.

"Is everything alright?" Sakura asked as she stopped at the nurse's station on her way out.

"Nice and quiet tonight, Sensei. You should go home and get some rest," one of the nurses replied. For once, Sakura nodded her assent. She raised a hand in greeting before she was headed down the stairs and out the door.

Arms bare, Sakura crossed them behind her back as she walked. The streets were empty. Lights set up on the sides of the roads cast fat pools of warm orange on the ground. Each time Sakura stepped through one, she watched her skin turn orange. For those few seconds, she listened to the buzz of the electricity inside the lights humming like a hundred bees.

Normally Sakura stuck to the rooftops to travel. It was faster and she liked looking at the village from higher up. She could watch the odd lights in the windows of buildings she passed. Sometimes she watched silhouettes dance across the panes and she was granted a brief glimpse into the life of a completely different person. But tonight she stuck to the ground. All she could see were the locked doors and darkened windows. The only signs of life were from the ramen stand as old man sat slurping noodles between sips of sake.

By the time she reached the Uchiha district, Sakura felt a slight chill. The weather had been nice enough all week, but it was cool at night and she hadn't thought to wear a sweater to work that morning. Rubbing her hands up and down her arms, she unlocked the front door to the only clean house on the street and let herself in. She pushed her shoes in a neat line right next to Sasuke's before she stepped up onto the raised platform of the house.

She stopped in the kitchen to peek into the refrigerator. It was dismally empty save for a plastic container of miso paste and a bottle of ketchup. Then again, she hadn't expected Sasuke to go grocery shopping the moment he stepped foot in the village after almost a month.

Practically tip-toeing, Sakura stepped onto the wooden walkway that wrapped around the house. She had always liked that about Sasuke's home. In the typical traditional fashion, there was no hallway in the inside- just this outdoor path. In the center of the house was a square courtyard decorated with a small pond. Sakura could see the empty patches in the grass where there had once been various plants and decorations that had died off. She and Sasuke had spent a day pulling weeds and gathering up dead leaves but they had never gotten around to doing anything else about the garden. The pond was mostly filled with rainwater. The carp that had once swum around in the waters were long gone but that was something Sasuke didn't seem particularly interested in fixing either. One of the only things really left intact was the big gingko tree. The fan-shaped leaves swayed majestically in even the smallest of breezes.

Taking just an extra moment to appreciate the modest remains of the garden, Sakura moved on to enter Sasuke's room. She didn't bother to slide the door shut behind her. Sasuke didn't stir from his bed at all. All she could see was the top of his dark hair peeking out from under the covers. His backpack was set next to his dresser and his shirt was tossed carelessly on the floor next to the bed. The gingko leaves whispered together outside as they swooned in the wind.

Sakura watched Sasuke sleeping peacefully for a minute until she decided against waking him. She sat on the floor next to the bed, pressing her back against the side of the mattress. The soft sounds of his breaths were in her ear. From here, she could see the little garden with its motionless pond. The shadow of the gingko leaves danced across the dark surface of the water. Sakura drew her knee up to her chest as she began to think.

Someday, Sakura decided as she stared out onto the wood deck, there would be little footsteps chasing each other around. Ino had brought up a crazy idea one day over lunch.

"Hey, so I was thinking, when you give any patient an organ transplant, you feed them medication to keep them from rejecting the organ. Why not do the same for you?" Ino babbled, hardly able to pronounce her words properly in all her excitement. At first the idea had sounded so simple that it sounded impossible. But the longer she thought, the more Sakura realized that she could hope again.

She could take an immunosuppressant and it would be possible to become a mother. Wrestling with her body wasn't that difficult. It was strong, but she was smarter. That much she was certain of.

When she pulled the clip from her hair, the smell of her shampoo filled her nose. Running her fingers through the locks, she tilted her head to look back at Sasuke's sleeping form. The steady rise and fall of his bare back was a rhythm of its own. She had never guessed Sasuke would be someone who usually slept on his stomach. But then again, she never would have pegged him as someone with such a fierce insistence for cuddling in the morning.

"Sasuke," she called in a quiet voice. When he didn't stir, she reached up to poke his cheek. He grunted before his one eye slowly cracked open.

"Ah, when did you get here?" he mumbled in his scratchiest voice.

"Good to see you too. I thought you'd be a little happier to see me," Sakura said as she rose to her feet. Sasuke's hand moved over her arm and then grasped her elbow to pull her in closer. A smile softened her expression as she leaned in to kiss his cheek. But as her lips made contact with his face, she caught sight of something red. Yanking the comforter away from him, she exposed two long red lines that cut through his back diagonally.

"What did you do? Have sex with a girl with knives for hands?" Sakura scoffed as she sat on the edge of the bed.

"Ha ha," Sasuke flatly said into his pillow. Chakra flooded her hands when she placed them on his warm back. Her fingers slowly traced from his right shoulder all the way down. She erased the hurt thoroughly. Eyes closed, she couldn't see the ugly red lines shrink and vanish under her touch.

"What would you do if I said yes to that?" queried Sasuke. His voice was so calm that she almost didn't realize what he was talking about.

She then calmly reached over and pinched the sensitive skin under his arm.

"Sleep-talk when you're asleep," she retorted. Sasuke's face scrunched up from the pain but he remained a motionless lump as her hands began to massage the smoothed expanse of his back. The heels of her palms pressed firmly against the muscles. Whenever she found a knot of tension, she pressed into the flesh, kneading and rubbing until the muscles unwound themselves.

"Sasuke-kun," she called in a soft voice.

"Hm?" he grunted.

She paused her work for a moment as she stared at his back. Using her left thumb, she traced the curve of his shoulder blade. His muscles rippled as he lifted himself slightly to look back at her.

"Nothing," she replied after a long moment. At this, Sasuke sat up, eyes scrutinizing her.

"Nothing!" Sakura insisted as she felt her cheeks begin to warm. But she soon buckled under the intensity of Sasuke's stare.

"I just missed you, okay? You idiot," she relented. Then she picked up a pillow and smacked him with it to distract him from the furious blush flooding her cheeks. He deflected the blow with his forearm, eyes never leaving her. The pillow flopped harmlessly to the floor while Sakura turned her back to him. With a loud sniff, she slid off the edge of the bed and onto the floor beside the discarded pillow. She crossed her arms over her chest in possibly the most childish thing she had done all day.

Sasuke watched her in silence for a while. He traced her back with his gaze, watching the way her shadow spilled across the floor beside her. Reaching out, he lightly touched her arm with the back of his hand.

"I'm home," he said in a soft voice.

"Welcome home," Sakura answered with a smile forming on her lips.


End file.
